Remind me never to have children

thattequilagirl

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Please don't patronise me. There is nothing wrong with my opinion as is.

Agree to disagree then... Have a good day.

Ice Maiden

thattequilagirl wrote: »

Hands up then, I'll just have to admit I am a bit judgemental when someone's biggest hobby is drinking. As I've said, I think there's absolutely no harm in it every now and then, but as a lifestyle choice, I consider it to be a poor one.

Did people say their biggest hobby was drinking?

5rtytry56

PARlance wrote: »

Maybe one day, one of those bored and depressed mothers will raise a kid who goes on to create fascinating threads like this on After Hours. I'm sure it will fill her with such pride that she'll realise that all of those elbows on the table were worth it.

These bored and depressed mothers can show off this thread to their 18 year old sons and daughters in 6th year for their 'coming of age' :cool:

Turtyturd

Slagging off kids and Beats in the one post, the OP is the ultimate AH stereotype. His neck beard will probably prevent him engaging in the necessities for having kids so no worries there.

thattequilagirl

thattequilagirl wrote: »

Where did I try to assert authority over anyone?

I expressed an opinion that's different from yours, that's all.

You claimed that dying of a hangover at 35 is a bit sad and that people should really have moved on from that.

My claim was everyone is different and gets happiness from different things regardless of what age they are.

There is a difference there tequilagirl. Your post is being judgemental regarding the choices a person makes. Who made you the authority on what constitutes a sad life or not?

Do you see where I'm coming from? I am simply challenging the judgement in your post.

chrissb8

I just think people have kids too early on in life sometimes. I don't mean your 16 year old teenage girl with 2 kids I'm talking about the young married couple late 20's early 30's. Just a sense some people are in a rush to do it all very fat. See them getting married late 20's kids within a year or two. Still young like, plenty of time for all that. Don't think you have to be grown up and have kids because that's how things are supposed to go. If you have any wants or desires go do them. I'd preferably want to be in a place where I've done everything I wanted to do while I was young then settle down. I know some people getting married at 27, good for them I suppose but I do wonder is it a bit big of a step when they've only been out of home less than a year or two.

thattequilagirl

Ice Maiden wrote: »

Did people say their biggest hobby was drinking?

It was implied pretty strongly in the OP

thattequilagirl

Deleted User wrote: »

You claimed that dying of a hangover at 35 is a bit sad and that people should really have moved on from that.

My claim was everyone is different and gets happiness from different things regardless of what age they are.

There is a difference there tequilagirl. Your post is being judgemental regarding the choices a person makes. Who made you the authority on what constitutes a sad life or not?

Do you see where I'm coming from? I am simply challenging the judgement in your post.

That's my opinion Persepoly. You might not like it, but that's how I feel. I'm allowed to express my opinion and you're allowed to not like it.

Alf Veedersane

It never ceases to amaze me how people don't see the vast swathes of spectrum that lie between each end of it.

kunst nugget

I'm in my late thirties with a hangover and kids. I rather have kids than a hangover. You can't psychologically torture a hangover.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

thattequilagirl wrote: »

That's my opinion Persepoly. You might not like it, but that's how I feel. I'm allowed to express my opinion and you're allowed to not like it.

Absolutely, and people are free to do whatever they like with their free time, and have whatever enjoyment or hobbies they like within reason, without condescending judgemental comments on their lifestyle choice. Just live and let live eh? Once they're not impacting on you or your life choices, who do you think you are speaking down to them?

thattequilagirl

thattequilagirl wrote: »

That's my opinion Persepoly. You might not like it, but that's how I feel. I'm allowed to express my opinion and you're allowed to not like it.

You are right Tequila. I really struggle with judgemental statements over how a person should live their life.

Ice Maiden

thattequilagirl wrote: »

That's my opinion Persepoly. You might not like it, but that's how I feel. I'm allowed to express my opinion and you're allowed to not like it.

Don't get snippy if people judge you, so.

andekwarhola

kunst nugget wrote: »

I'm in my late thirties with a hangover and kids.

Same.

I'm trying hard to see myself in the stock archetypes of this thread and failing.

storker

Hammer89 wrote: »

Perhaps, but the reason they were in the pub at 2pm was because they had turned into that woman; the woman whose Sunday dinner is at a time which used to be their Sunday breakfast more or less.

...and that's bad because...?

thattequilagirl

Ice Maiden wrote: »

Don't get snippy if people judge you, so.

This is exactly what's pissing me off. Somehow several posters on this thread think it's perfectly acceptable to judge non-drinkers, but get awfully sensitive if their choice of lifestyle is called into question. It's all very well to say live and let live, by my choice of lifestyle has been demeaned a number of times on this thread. So you can't have it both ways.

I also don't understand people who spend their weekends running marathons, I'd never in a million years spend my weekend like that. Am I being judgemental against people who run marathons? Or is it just an opinion.

ibarelycare

thattequilagirl wrote: »

This is exactly what's pissing me off. Somehow several posters on this thread think it's perfectly acceptable to judge non-drinkers, but get awfully sensitive if their choice of lifestyle is called into question. It's all very well to say live and let live, by my choice of lifestyle has been demeaned a number of times on this thread. So you can't have it both ways.

I also don't understand people who spend their weekends running marathons, I'd never in a million years spend my weekend like that. Am I being judgemental against people who run marathons? Or is it just an opinion.

Where was your lifestyle demeaned? Genuine question, I skimmed through a lot of this thread so I might have pissed some posts.

thattequilagirl

thattequilagirl wrote: »

I also don't understand people who spend their weekends running marathons, I'd never in a million years spend my weekend like that. Am I being judgemental against people who run marathons? Or is it just an opinion.

No of course not, it becomes judgemental when you call people who run marathons "woefully sad" like you did about people who might have a hangover on a Sunday and don't want kids at 35.

storker

Emmadilema123 wrote: »

The biggest problem here is they have taken their children to a pub! Pub is no fun with children!

Bingo. Pubs are no fun with children, and pubs are no fun for children. Children are very good at making their own entertainment from what's available, but a pub's scope is exhausted too quickly. Our kids have only ever found themselves in a pub when they were there for a meal, and that works fine...meal over, exit pub.

lawred2

Hammer89 wrote: »

Before today, I was quite keen on fatherhood. I loved the idea of being a dad, but all that changed this afternoon.

I'm in the pub watching the football. This isn't a particularly sporty pub; my mate was the only one wearing a football jersey, while most of the people around us seemed far too interested in their carveries to notice that a massive football match was taking place on the telly.

I had to keep my cuss words to a minimum because the place was full of more nuclear families than Pripyat. I was interested in the match, but I was a lot more interested in observing how miserable the mothers looked. We're talking middle-class young mothers, say late 20s or early 30s, and they looked heart-breakingly fed up with life.

They'd sit lazily with their elbow on the table, the palm of their hand pressed against the side of their head, like a teenage girl in Geography class, just waiting to die more or less. It looked as if they had realised their life was basically over. They're slowly but surely getting old.

They used to spend their Sundays nursing hangovers and discussing the wild and hilarious stories from the night before. Now they're the types who go for Sunday lunches with their older husbands and think: 'if only I made him wear a johnny'. I wanted to hug them. Seriously.

Never have children. They might seem like a good idea, but they're expensive and sooner or later you'll think 'actually, this is a bit sh*t'. I'd liken them to Beats by Dre. Just don't bother.

yeah watching lads kicking a balloon around a field is much more rewarding than raising your own family..

simple answer here is for you not to have kids

Wanderer78

Our economic situation over the last few years has hammered the crap out of everyone particularly young families. Maybe op you're seeing the effects of this? It eventually takes its toll!

Hammer89

ibarelycare wrote: »

I'd rather have a hangover once a week than a child 24/7. Incredibly easy choice. At least with the hangover you wake up the next day and it's gone.

So is a child if you take it to Portugal.

valoren wrote: »

The League Cup is a "massive" game of football now?

We both know there was another match on pal, at 2pm, the time I stated.

OP, you missed it. It is not their lives that is regret, it is sitting in the bar on a Sunday when their partner finds some fascination with the irrelevance that is a football game in England for a trophy that no club really cares about.

lawred2

lawred2 wrote: »

yeah watching lads kicking a balloon around a field is much more rewarding than raising your own family..

simple answer here is for you not to have kids

Um - that's what the thread title says :P

thattequilagirl

ibarelycare wrote: »

Where was your lifestyle demeaned? Genuine question, I skimmed through a lot of this thread so I might have pissed some posts.

I can't do multiple quotes as I'm on my phone, but a few pages back it was suggested that I don't enjoy life and never "let my hair down" because I don't drink. That's just one of a few examples.

Alf Veedersane

lawred2 wrote: »

yeah watching lads kicking a balloon around a field is much more rewarding than raising your own family..

Ahhh heyor!

Have you ever tried kicking a balloon around? It's nothing like a football.

Though it might be a good game for the kids to play during the match.


--> Dragon's Den

arayess

i have kids and I agree with the OP.
nothing as depressing as seeing some lad my own age spending his weekends wandering around IKEA or retail centre dragging kids with him while looking depressed and dejected.
few parents ever look happy in public.

although that said , bringing your kids to the pub was something I never understood

Hammer89

Deleted User wrote: »

OP, you missed it. It is not their lives that is regret, it is sitting in the bar on a Sunday when their partner finds some fascination with the irrelevance that is a football game in England for a trophy that no club really cares about.

Their partners weren't watching the match. And you've got the wrong match like the last bloke.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

thattequilagirl wrote: »

I can't do multiple quotes as I'm on my phone, but a few pages back it was suggested that I don't enjoy life and never "let my hair down" because I don't drink. That's just one of a few examples.

After you described child free people hungover at 35 as woefully sad.

osarusan

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

It never ceases to amaze me how people don't see the vast swathes of spectrum that lie between each end of it.

NO. THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND HERE.

thattequilagirl

thattequilagirl wrote: »

I can't do multiple quotes as I'm on my phone, but a few pages back it was suggested that I don't enjoy life and never "let my hair down" because I don't drink. That's just one of a few examples.

No they didn't.

They told you to go have a few pints, they didn't even know you didn't drink until after that post when you pointed it out!!!

Deleted User wrote: »

Your comment regarding people who are hungover at 35 didn't strike me at all as being funny. Have a few pints. Let yourself go. Who knows you might relax a bit and enjoy yourself.

thattequilagirl wrote: »

Fair enough- but Hammer89s proposition that we all spend our Sundays hungover and never have children sounds woefully sad to me. Yeah, if it's an occasional thing, grand, but not every weekend. By the way, did you not find the original post pretty judgemental of parents?

lawred2

Deleted User wrote: »

Um - that's what the thread title says :P

end thread then

sorted

what was the point?

thattequilagirl

thattequilagirl wrote: »

I can't do multiple quotes as I'm on my phone, but a few pages back it was suggested that I don't enjoy life and never "let my hair down" because I don't drink. That's just one of a few examples.

If you are referring to where I said that you should have a few pints because you might enjoy yourself I apologised for being deliberately provocative there.
Of course I don't believe that how you live your life is less than how anyone else lives their's.

Alf Veedersane

This thread has also highlighted that it's a bit odd/sad/strange to enjoy watching football between two teams from another country.

Who knew the only normal things to enjoy have to have the Guaranteed Irish stamp?

Hammer89

Hammer89 wrote: »

Their partners weren't watching the match. And you've got the wrong match like the last bloke.

I forgot there was another match from England not even for a trophy! A special kind of hell for the poor women

thattequilagirl

Deleted User wrote: »

No of course not, it becomes judgemental when you call people who run marathons "woefully sad" like you did about people who might have a hangover on a Sunday and don't want kids at 35.

Not "a Sunday", but "every Sunday". That's a very important distinction.

I've said a few times that I have no issue with people getting drunk and having hangovers now and then. Just that I don't think it's a good lifestyle to aspire to, as the OP seems to suggest.

People are choosing to take it as an attack on anyone who's had a hangover ever, but that's not what I said.

With regard to the 35 year old comment, it's an arbitrary age I chose. My opinion is that regardless of drinking and hangovers, if your priorities are exactly the same at 35 as they were at 25, something's wrong there. If that's judgemental, I guess I'm feeling a little judgemental today.

At least I can own up to it, unlike some of the faux-outraged here.

Alf Veedersane

arayess wrote: »

i have kids and I agree with the OP.
nothing as depressing as seeing some lad my own age spending his weekends wandering around IKEA or retail centre dragging kids with him while looking depressed and dejected.
few parents ever look happy in public.

You will never see me look happy in IKEA.

Or pretty much any shop.

Nothing to do with children.

lawred2

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

You will never see me look happy in IKEA.

Or pretty much any shop.

Nothing to do with children.

nonsense

you are quite clearly regretting your life decisions and would much prefer to be in the pub watching ball chasers and judging the local women folk..

lawred2

arayess wrote: »

i have kids and I agree with the OP.
nothing as depressing as seeing some lad my own age spending his weekends wandering around IKEA or retail centre dragging kids with him while looking depressed and dejected.
few parents ever look happy in public.

although that said , bringing your kids to the pub was something I never understood

I wonder is that a case of projecting?

thattequilagirl

thattequilagirl wrote: »

Not "a Sunday", but "every Sunday".

...........

thattequilagirl wrote: »

Dying of a hangover on a Sunday is grand at 25, at 35 it's a bit sad. You don't need to have kids to be an adult- but you do need to move past that stage.

kunst nugget

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

You will never see me look happy in IKEA.

Or pretty much any shop.

Nothing to do with children.

I think it's pretty sad that you don't like IKEA. I think you'll have changed your mind about it in 5 years time. Obviously, in my early twenties I thought it was great to hate on Ikea but now that I'm older and more contented I now know the inherent joy of Swedish flat pack furniture..

kunst nugget

That Tequila Girl is a very odd username for a non-drinking thirtysomething…

thattequilagirl

Don't understand your point whoopsadaisy, the two quotes you highlighted don't contradict each other. I expanded on my point and got rid of the word "sad" as it seems to offend people and I'm not out to offend anyone.

Alf Veedersane

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

This thread has also highlighted that it's a bit odd/sad/strange to enjoy watching football between two teams from another country.

Who knew the only normal things to enjoy have to have the Guaranteed Irish stamp?

There is nothing wrong with people enjoying the football games from another country. It's valid entertainment. But to show up in the pub wearing their shirt and adopting (?) the accents of the city the teams are from is bizarro

thattequilagirl

kunst nugget wrote: »

That Tequila Girl is a very odd username for a non-drinking thirtysomething…

I'm in my late 20s, and things have changed a lot since I joined boards in 2007/8

Charles Babbage

Unfortunately you grow old with or without children, I don't know many old people who are glad to have no children, although some are disappointed in the actual children they had.

kunst nugget

Deleted User wrote: »

There is nothing wrong with people enjoying the football games from another country. It's valid entertainment. But to show up in the pub wearing their shirt and adopting (?) the accents of the city the teams are from is bizarro

Eh! Eh! Alright! Alright! Calm down! Calm down! Dey do dough, don't dey dough!

Alf Veedersane

kunst nugget wrote: »

I think it's pretty sad that you don't like IKEA. I think you'll have changed your mind about it in 5 years time. Obviously, in my early twenties I thought it was great to hate on Ikea but now that I'm older and more contented I now know the inherent joy of Swedish flat pack furniture..

I respect the hell out of Swedish flat pack furniture. It has made life better in so many ways and when I'm in hotels and take out their copy of the Bible, I think how much better Noah would have had it if they'd had an IKEA on the outskirts of....wherever. Could have knocked together an ark in an hour or so and let rip on a load of meatballs in the time he saved.

But it's a labyrinthine place with no escape.

Maximus Alexander

Ahhhh, After Hours. Where every lifestyle is the wrong lifestyle.

Alf Veedersane

Deleted User wrote: »

There is nothing wrong with people enjoying the football games from another country. It's valid entertainment. But to show up in the pub wearing their shirt and adopting (?) the accents of the city the teams are from is bizarro

When I do watch football out, I don't watch them in The Parody Pub.