Online dating

Superhero1993

Deleted User wrote: »

Then you are good to go

Not according to my past experience with online dating lol

*** I done the lol thing again.........crap

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

armaghlad wrote: »

I only ask for their snapchat if they seem catfishy. And if not snapchat then some form or social media that verifies that they are who they say they are. Most of the time you can distinguish which ones are catfish though

I get that nobody wants to be catfished but if you feel like you're being messed about, stop writing to them. Nobody needs to justify their existence or prove themselves to you. If you asked me for something like that, I'd tell you to eff off.

armaghlad

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I get that nobody wants to be catfished but if you feel like you're being messed about, stop writing to them. Nobody needs to justify their existence or prove themselves to you. If you asked me for something like that, I'd tell you to eff off.

But what if they're pretttyyyyyy!?!?!

To be fair I ask it more for the reaction rather than wanting their actual snapchat as I don't actually use it that much. If they get uppity like tomwaterford says they can just block me again straight after.

Superhero1993

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I get that nobody wants to be catfished but if you feel like you're being messed about, stop writing to them. Nobody needs to justify their existence or prove themselves to you. If you asked me for something like that, I'd tell you to eff off.

Its an app that has no info on it. Can't see the big deal. Ya can easily block them.

Eircom_Sucks

if somebody bases their attraction on you're grammer then in my opinion i would not waste my time on them to be honest.

whatever happened to the person being nice and genuine ?

i personally know 2 guys who both work for huge multicorporate companies and both earn over €130k , but both text using text speak etc , does that mean that they don't warrant a proper chat because they use lol instead of laughing out loud ?

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Superhero1993 wrote: »

Its an app that has no info on it. Can't see the big deal. Ya can easily block them.

It's an app with my Instagram handle, it's my snapchat. I might not want a stranger looking at my stories. I might not feel comfortable putting myself in the position of recieving a few dick pics before deleting him.

Are you serious? Get uppity? You ask them for "their reaction?"
Ask them on a date, and if you still like each other then add each other as friends on social media. You posted about asking a girl for two forms of identification (her Facebook, and her snapchat AFTER she gave you her place of employment) they'd ask for less in the dole office if she went in looking for money

Lyaiera

PandaX9 wrote: »

Here, I'm not trying to be forward but like.. If you ever decide you want to go for women I'll gladly try a relationship with you. Or even friendship. You sound like my soulmate. Friend soulmate. I swear I could have written that post!

I'm not a great book reader, in reality. I told him I'd be reading a photobook, not a words book. I really like photography, and read far more photobooks than novels. Although I do read the words in the photobooks, especially interviews with the artist. And I'm also not a great sit at home person. If I had someone to sit at home with, that'd change, and I really want someone to cuddle up on the couch with. But as I don't have that at the moment, I go out and prop up a bar.

And sexuality is a weird one for me. I'm a transgender woman (and make that clear in my profile.) I've had "encounters" with women as a teenager when I didn't understand what I was going through, and those encounters did nothing for me. But since accepting myself I've become more open to things in general. I'm definitely attracted to men, they make me feel funny. But occasionally (and less than with men) women have made me feel funny too.

And as I think about it I'm left unsure. I was never attracted to women when I thought I was a man, but as I understand my self more, I'm becoming more open to the idea. I don't get immodest thoughts just by looking at women like sometimes happens with men, although I can look at a woman and think she's stunning. But there's been a few times with women that we've been drunk, and really opening up to each other and ended up holding hands and I've been turned on by it (and I think they have been too.) So I don't know what that makes me? And it kind of goes back to what I was saying about attraction earlier. A man may not be physically attractive by general measures, but if I connect with them emotionally and mentally I can find myself being physically attracted to them. I've never thought of myself as a lesbian, or bisexual, but it seems an attraction to particular women has happened to me a few times over the years. Although I've never pursued it because I'm probably 90% straight, and I doubt there's many women who would want to date someone who's only exploring their sexuality. Especially when I may realise it's not actually for me in the end. So I stick to dating guys.

tl:dr the kinsey scale has a lot to answer for

Edit: Jaysus, I talk a load a rubbish.

Superhero1993

LexieOnRale wrote: »

It's an app with my Instagram handle, it's my snapchat. I might not want a stranger looking at my stories. I might not feel comfortable putting myself in the position of recieving a few dick pics before deleting him.

Are you serious? Get uppity? You ask them for "their reaction?"
Ask them on a date, and if you still like each other then add each other as friends on social media. You posted about asking a girl for two forms of identification (her Facebook, and her snapchat AFTER she gave you her place of employment) they'd ask for less in the dole office if she went in looking for money

When I ask for Snapchat it would be before a date so I wouldn't call myself a stranger.
Haven't a clue what the second paragraph is about tbh.

armaghlad

LexieOnRale wrote: »

It's an app with my Instagram handle, it's my snapchat. I might not want a stranger looking at my stories. I might not feel comfortable putting myself in the position of recieving a few dick pics before deleting him.

Are you serious? Get uppity? You ask them for "their reaction?"
Ask them on a date, and if you still like each other then add each other as friends on social media. You posted about asking a girl for two forms of identification (her Facebook, and her snapchat AFTER she gave you her place of employment) they'd ask for less in the dole office if she went in looking for money

This isn't every girl. This are girls I suspect of being catfish. I ask to get their reaction... it will either be "yes I do, it's ... add away" and I add and see they've a proper sc going on; or alternatively it's "no I don't have snapchat" or "no I don't give it out"... then it's bye bye catfish!

As for employment it's usually the women ask that question!

Lyaiera

LexieOnRale wrote: »

God I hate that.
Men thinking they've a God given right to your private information

"Where do you work?"
"What's your surname? Add me on facebook."
"Add me on snapchat?"


Call me paranoid but I a) don't have to prove myself to anybody or b) need to pander to his trust issues or c) am not so stuck for choice that I feel obliged to disclose private identifing information to someone I don't know from Adam.

My Facebook is very private. I keep everything on it private. My friends, my wall, my photo. People can't tag me in anything without approval. I would have nothing to hide but someone pressing me for private information before meeting them in person would be told no. And if they continue to press, I'd just block them.

"Where do you live?"
"Cork" (Which it says in my profile.)
"Where in Cork?"
"The city centre."
"Oh whereabouts in the city centre."
*Block* while thinking, "I'm not telling you that because I don't want to wake up to someone standing over me and breathing heavily."

PandaX9

armaghlad wrote: »

This isn't every girl. This are girls I suspect of being catfish. I ask to get their reaction... it will either be "yes I do, it's ... add away" and I add and see they've a proper sc going on; or alternatively it's "no I don't have snapchat" or "no I don't give it out"... then it's bye bye catfish!

As for employment it's usually the women ask that question!

But what if the girls are just very private people who may not feel comfortable with the prospect of sending photos of themselves to strangers? I love Snapchat personally but on occasion people I don't know well have taken screenshots of my snaps and it has always left me feeling very "wtf was that about?".

Superhero1993

PandaX9 wrote: »

But what if the girls are just very private people who may not feel comfortable with the prospect of sending photos of themselves to strangers? I love Snapchat personally but on occasion people I don't know well have taken screenshots of my snaps and it has always left me feeling very "wtf was that about?".

Thats fair enough but it sounds like women like these would be difficult to get to know through online dating. *That's sharing info now not just pics.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

I would tell you I wasn't giving you my snapchat or my Facebook. and I've never used catfish pics

Superhero1993

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I would tell you I wasn't giving you my snapchat or my Facebook. and I've never used catfish pics

Would you meet a guy only after speaking through POF?

tomwaterford

PandaX9 wrote: »

But what if the girls are just very private people who may not feel comfortable with the prospect of sending photos of themselves to strangers? I love Snapchat personally but on occasion people I don't know well have taken screenshots of my snaps and it has always left me feeling very "wtf was that about?".

I never send pics of myself on smapchat...just use it as a msging service
Like take a pic with blank background et and write the msg....

armaghlad

PandaX9 wrote: »

But what if the girls are just very private people who may not feel comfortable with the prospect of sending photos of themselves to strangers? I love Snapchat personally but on occasion people I don't know well have taken screenshots of my snaps and it has always left me feeling very "wtf was that about?".

Well that sort of defeats the purpose of successful online dating. I've had people take screen shots too. The key is to keep your clothes on when you snap :pac:

armaghlad

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I would tell you I wasn't giving you my snapchat or my Facebook. and I've never used catfish pics

To me it's also just a natural progression from chatting to someone for x amount of time.. either they or I will mention snapchat or Facebook. I mean what are they going to do? See your pictures and and maybe poke you? You can always ignore them, unfriend them or block them.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Yes, if he wasn't pushy, we had a good connection and I was getting good vibes.
We would be equal. I wouldn't expect him to jump through hoops to reassure me he is who he says he is. I can't understand what benefits I'd get from knowing where he lived and where he worked before even knowing if I liked him *like that* and I'd be very offended if I was expected to prove myself to a stranger to secure a first date when I did not give any reason for any suspicion

PandaX9

Eircom_Sucks wrote: »

if somebody bases their attraction on you're grammer then in my opinion i would not waste my time on them to be honest.

whatever happened to the person being nice and genuine ?

i personally know 2 guys who both work for huge multicorporate companies and both earn over €130k , but both text using text speak etc , does that mean that they don't warrant a proper chat because they use lol instead of laughing out loud ?

The use of text speak does not automatically render someone undateable to me. However, we are all entitled to our own opinions and for me personally, I feel much more at ease texting someone who doesn't require me to decipher hieroglyphics in order to understand them. I wouldn't stop dating someone just because they don't bother writing correctly at all times; but it certainly would piss me off if they texted as though they were drunk all the time. Despite my posts here, I'm all for brevity and being concise :pac: but not at the detriment of syntax..

In my case, I was brought up speaking two languages simultaneously which have very different grammars behind them and I suppose after years of being lectured on how to speak properly by my parents (thankfully), I suppose I see poor grammar usage by an individual who only ever uses one language a little.. Lazy. And I'm probably in the minority there, and that's ok. It's not as though I stop people mid-text and say "whoa whoa whoa HOLD IT. Did you mean to say you saw when you wrote you 'seen'? Or did you mean you had seen?"


If that makes me "intellectually" shallow then so be it, I guess. Nothing else I can really say.

Superhero1993

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Yes, if he wasn't pushy, we had a good connection and I was getting good vibes.
We would be equal. I wouldn't expect him to jump through hoops to reassure me he is who he says he is. I can't understand what benefits I'd get from knowing where he lived and where he worked before even knowing if I liked him *like that* and I'd be very offended if I was expected to prove myself to a stranger to secure a first date when I did not give any reason for any suspicion

But what about a guy asking you for his number on a night out? Ya will know him as well as the person online etc. Any woman I have asked for their Snapchat, 90% exchange details.

Superhero1993

PandaX9 wrote: »

The use of text speak does not automatically render someone undateable to me. However, we are all entitled to our own opinions and for me personally, I feel much more at ease texting someone who doesn't require me to decipher hieroglyphics in order to understand them. I wouldn't stop dating someone just because they don't bother writing correctly at all times; but it certainly would piss me off if they texted as though they were drunk all the time. Despite my posts here, I'm all for brevity and being concise :pac: but not at the detriment of syntax..

In my case, I was brought up speaking two languages simultaneously which have very different grammars behind them and I suppose after years of being lectured on how to speak properly by my parents (thankfully), I suppose I see poor grammar usage by an individual who only ever uses one language a little.. Lazy. And I'm probably in the minority there, and that's ok. It's not as though I stop people mid-text and say "whoa whoa whoa HOLD IT. Did you mean to say you saw when you wrote you 'seen'? Or did you mean you had seen?"


If that makes me "intellectually" shallow then so be it, I guess. Nothing else I can really say.

Us guys have no chance

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Superhero1993 wrote: »

But what about a guy asking you for his number on a night out? Ya will know him as well as the person online etc. Any woman I have asked for their Snapchat, 90% exchange details.

I'd give it to him, if I was into him because he has no other way of contacting me. Someone online does.

Superhero1993

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I'd give it to him, if I was into him because he has no other way of contacting me. Someone online does.

Good response. touche I personally feel it's far too risky meeting someone that could easily be fake.

PandaX9

Superhero1993 wrote: »

Us guys have no chance

Maybe there is a reason why I'm forever alone.. Except for the fact that I'm frantically trying to juggle this thread and doing my make up for a date right now :eek:. Was so ingrossed with talking about online dating I forgot I'm meant to be doing it in a couple of hours!

That's it, Panda out for now.

tomwaterford

PandaX9 wrote: »

Maybe there is a reason why I'm forever alone.. Except for the fact that I'm frantically trying to juggle this thread and doing my make up for a date right now :eek:. Was so ingrossed with talking about online dating I forgot I'm meant to be doing it in a couple of hours!

That's it, Panda out for now.

Best of luck....


Get the roide :P

Eircom_Sucks

PandaX9 wrote: »

The use of text speak does not automatically render someone undateable to me. However, we are all entitled to our own opinions and for me personally, I feel much more at ease texting someone who doesn't require me to decipher hieroglyphics in order to understand them. I wouldn't stop dating someone just because they don't bother writing correctly at all times; but it certainly would piss me off if they texted as though they were drunk all the time. Despite my posts here, I'm all for brevity and being concise :pac: but not at the detriment of syntax..

In my case, I was brought up speaking two languages simultaneously which have very different grammars behind them and I suppose after years of being lectured on how to speak properly by my parents (thankfully), I suppose I see poor grammar usage by an individual who only ever uses one language a little.. Lazy. And I'm probably in the minority there, and that's ok. It's not as though I stop people mid-text and say "whoa whoa whoa HOLD IT. Did you mean to say you saw when you wrote you 'seen'? Or did you mean you had seen?"


If that makes me "intellectually" shallow then so be it, I guess. Nothing else I can really say.

i appreciate the reply

but for me there would be more concerning facts on if i date a person or not , their grammer being the bottom of the pile , with genuine , honesty , easy going up at the top , now if somebody was completely illiterate i'd understand , but the odd lol or lmao here or there surely is ok ?

PandaX9

Eircom_Sucks wrote: »

i appreciate the reply

but for me there would be more concerning facts on if i date a person or not , their grammer being the bottom of the pile , with genuine , honesty , easy going up at the top , now if somebody was completely illiterate i'd understand , but the odd lol or lmao here or there surely is ok ?

Oh of course! Abbreviations and contractions are great! I don't mean to come across like I write on tinder as though I'm penning a letter to my long lost love circa the civil war I'm just not a fan of people who write as though they used a sentence made up solely of "lmao rofl yolo" and then put that into google translate from English to Greek, then Greek to mandarin, then mandarin to Samoan and then sent me whatever Google spat at them :pac:, and trust me you do get people who write like that.

We have something in common. My top attractive qualities in another person as are follows: kindness, honesty and being respectful to themselves and others. If someone is genuinely self-confident, I feel like that will reflect in their interactions with others.

Superhero1993

PandaX9 wrote: »

Maybe there is a reason why I'm forever alone.. Except for the fact that I'm frantically trying to juggle this thread and doing my make up for a date right now :eek:. Was so ingrossed with talking about online dating I forgot I'm meant to be doing it in a couple of hours!

That's it, Panda out for now.

Best of luck.

And if it doesn't go well, hit me up

wakka12

Eircom_Sucks wrote: »

i appreciate the reply

but for me there would be more concerning facts on if i date a person or not , their grammer being the bottom of the pile , with genuine , honesty , easy going up at the top , now if somebody was completely illiterate i'd understand , but the odd lol or lmao here or there surely is ok ?

Was the ironic misspelling of grammar intentional ?

Lyaiera

The text speak thing smacks of someone putting in no effort. And putting lol at the end of every sentence is like you have no confidence in what you just said, so have to write everything off as you "avin' a laff."