Online dating

The Backwards Man

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Be sure and ask them their thoughts on turf, I'm crossing a lot of them off my list!:pac:

I'm thinking maybe you and peresoply may be good together............

XR3i

bubblypop wrote: »

I'm thinking maybe you and peresoply may be good together............

i don't think either of them could drive a tractor

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

I'd be inclined to agree superhero, definitely confidence. Not every couple in the country are made up of good looking people. You need to be comfortable with yourself and your own company before you'll be comfortable in a relationship too. If you're relying on her to keep you amused and not be bored, that's clingy and you're setting yourself up for a world of trouble.

I'd place looks much down the scale for a successful relationship, yes there needs to be mutual attraction but being alright looking doesn't make you relationship material.

What would you find to be a turn off in a potential partner?

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

XR3i wrote: »

i don't think either of them could drive a tractor

He needs a woman who knows her way round a holland!

XR3i

LexieOnRale wrote: »

He needs a woman who knows her way round a holland!

around amsterdam more like it

Superhero1993

I'm not being made to look very good here. I'm not clingy. I'm bored. She can do whatever she wants but it would be nice to go to the beach today with someone with the weather we have.

Esel

Superhero1993 wrote: »

There is nothing in my area as regards clubs. There's football clubs but I used to be in them a few years ago and frankly the guys aren't friendly. That is it. None that involve women as well.

A hobby does not necessarily have to involve other people though - e.g. art, woodcarving, DIY, nature study, running, swimming, etc.

Something you are passionate about. If that comes through on your profile (the passion) it will make you stand out a bit from the rest.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

I don't mean it in a bad way, it's perspective. I get that you're frustrated but you don't NEED a girlfriend to go to the beach. It would be nice, but you need to be happy and independent to do things by yourself or with your friends too. Having a girlfriend doesn't fix all that. Infact, it makes it more difficult. You'll want to go to the beach, she doesn't want to get all sand and she wants to go for lunch and to a beer garden, for example. There's lots of compromises, and little arguements. And a lot of doing things by yourself too for a bit of peace.

Don't get so hung up on your looks. They're not the be all and end all. Nobody is attractive to 100% of the population. Each and every person finds something different attractive.

XR3i

XR3i wrote: »

i don't think either of them could drive a tractor

Ooh I think they could make their way around a tractor .....

And each other!!!!.....

The Backwards Man

XR3i wrote: »

around amsterdam more like it

Put that in De Pijp and smoke it!:pac:

Esel

This thread - so many 'new users' that it might just be the future of Boards.

Shint0

Esel wrote: »

This thread - so many 'new users' that it might just be the future of Boards.

Some of them may or may not be 'new'.

endabob1

This thread has made me laugh quite a lot, very entertaining stuff read over a couple of boring days at work!
My experience, good and bad.
Had a message from this girl/woman through one of the sites, she seemed pretty cool but was always a wee bit slow in responding, i thought she wasn't interested. Because I'm working away, I knew it was a stretch.... Anyway, we met for a coffee, got on well so I was keen to keep it up, then again only a few messages, it was 6 weeks before I was home again and we met up for dinner, got on really well (I think) but she said the geography was too much of an issue. I would only be home every month/other month, shame really she was (is) very cool. Whenever I get back permanently I'll look her up again even as a friend, can never have enough good people in your life.

Had someone else message me, we clicked online straight away, went to whatsapp messaging, over and back the whole afternoon, then spoke on the phone for an hour, I asked her out the following weekend on the phone all good, then more whatsapps all evening, this was all in the same day. Next morning the messages started over and back again, we had exchanged more pictures all good, so late afternoon I said feck this, why wait till next weekend, lets cancel plans and meet this evening. So at short notice I did all the S's jumped in the car and drove an hour to meet her, a total disaster, complete fiasco, lasted one drink and we abandoned ship!! Took me twice as long to get there than the date itself lasted!!

Meet them in real life folks, it can be a whole different ball game!!

Tinder is an odd one, I don't like it, have only tried it a little bit, I get the whole instant attraction thing but the pictures tend to be deliberately deceptive and there are zero details, height is a big one for me (as a bit of a shortar$e) so I'm looking in the background to see if I can gauge how tall some of them are!!

Shint0

endabob1 wrote: »

Had someone else message me, we clicked online straight away, went to whatsapp messaging, over and back the whole afternoon, then spoke on the phone for an hour, I asked her out the following weekend on the phone all good, then more whatsapps all evening, this was all in the same day. Next morning the messages started over and back again, we had exchanged more pictures all good, so late afternoon I said feck this, why wait till next weekend, lets cancel plans and meet this evening. So at short notice I did all the S's jumped in the car and drove an hour to meet her, a total disaster, complete fiasco, lasted one drink and we abandoned ship!! Took me twice as long to get there than the date itself lasted!!

Meet them in real life folks, it can be a whole different ball game!!

Moral of the story: Intensity burns fast!

Esel

Shint0 wrote: »

Moral of the story: Intensity burns fat!

FYP

fin12

endabob1 wrote: »

This thread has made me laugh quite a lot, very entertaining stuff read over a couple of boring days at work!
My experience, good and bad.
Had a message from this girl/woman through one of the sites, she seemed pretty cool but was always a wee bit slow in responding, i thought she wasn't interested. Because I'm working away, I new it was a stretch.... Anyway, we met for a coffee, got on well so I was keen to keep it up, then again only a few messages, it was 6 weeks before I was home again and we met up for dinner, got on really well (I think) but she said the geography was too much of an issue. I would only be home every month/other month, shame really she was (is) very cool. Whenever I get back permanently I'll look her up again even as a friend, can never have enough good people in your life.

Had someone else message me, we clicked online straight away, went to whatsapp messaging, over and back the whole afternoon, then spoke on the phone for an hour, I asked her out the following weekend on the phone all good, then more whatsapps all evening, this was all in the same day. Next morning the messages started over and back again, we had exchanged more pictures all good, so late afternoon I said feck this, why wait till next weekend, lets cancel plans and meet this evening. So at short notice I did all the S's jumped in the car and drove an hour to meet her, a total disaster, complete fiasco, lasted one drink and we abandoned ship!! Took me twice as long to get there than the date itself lasted!!

Meet them in real life folks, it can be a whole different ball game!!

Tinder is an odd one, I don't like it, have only tried it a little bit, I get the whole instant attraction thing but the pictures tend to be deliberately deceptive and there are zero details, height is a big one for me (as a bit of a shortar$e) so I'm looking in the background to see if I can gauge how tall some of them are!!

its weird that ye were able to talk on the phone for up to an hour and then what happened on the date? was there very little conversation on the date or did they look different then their pictures?

Shint0

Esel wrote: »

FYP

I knew that Esel. There's more than one of us that can do a play on words

endabob1

fin12 wrote: »

its weird that ye were able to talk on the phone for up to an hour and then what happened on the date? was there very little conversation on the date or did they look different then their pictures?

zero conversation, zero chemistry, very odd indeed, I suspect we burnt out the topics on the phone and text.
She looked the same, I think I looked the same, all the pictures I use are in the last 6 months, I'm not tall but I told her my exact height before we met, she even made the observation that we were identical height, so perfect for kissing

Lesson harshly learned though!!

fin12

endabob1 wrote: »

zero conversation, zero chemistry, very odd indeed, I suspect we burnt out the topics on the phone and text.
She looked the same, I think I looked the same, all the pictures I use are in the last 6 months, I'm not tall but I told her my exact height before we met, she even made the observation that we were identical height, so perfect for kissing

Lesson harshly learned though!!

Sorry to hear that, I can't figure it out at all, i do know about thinking you are getting on great with someone and in the space of two weeks go completely off them. Do people have bad feelings towards someone who they have a really good date with and you would like to see them again but that person tells you that they don't feel the same. like what would be the feelings after that situation?

Shint0

fin12 wrote: »

Do people have bad feelings towards someone who they have a really good date with and you would like to see them again but that person tells you that they don't feel the same. like what would be the feelings after that situation?

Rage, anger, kicking and screaming, throw toys out of pram. Then nuke their car!!

Just kidding. Depends on the individual and how they handle rejection. Some are more or less sensitive than others.

endabob1

fin12 wrote: »

Sorry to hear that, I can't figure it out at all, i do know about thinking you are getting on great with someone and in the space of two weeks go completely off them. Do people have bad feelings towards someone who they have a really good date with and you would like to see them again but that person tells you that they don't feel the same. like what would be the feelings after that situation?

I laughed like a drain about it with my sisters the next day, thought it was hilarious tbh. I was pee'd off at the time because I'd driven so far but she was a recruitment consultant, I should have known better, wtf was I thinking????

I'm ok with it if someone is honest and doesn't mess you about. Possibly I'm a bit of a softie, but if I think I have been messed about I would be Dr Angry.

fin12

endabob1 wrote: »

I laughed like a drain about it with my sisters the next day, thought it was hilarious tbh. I was pee'd off at the time because I'd driven so far but she was a recruitment consultant, I should have known better, wtf was I thinking????

I'm ok with it if someone is honest and doesn't mess you about. Possibly I'm a bit of a softie, but if I think I have been messed about I would be Dr Angry.

Well you sound like you have a great sense of humor anyway. I should stop reading this thread because the guys on here sound lovely and then I'm thinking the people are lucky to have been asked out by ye. sorry Im probably not even making sense.

Superhero1993

Is there many on here around early 20's cos I think that the women around that age aren't that receptive online.

yourdeadwright

I had 2 dates recently with the same girl from Tinder ,both went really well,
Second date we end up being a bit bold, So I thought this is great pick up great looking girls go for a few dates ,have fun and move on to the next,
So I told her I didn't want anything serious and moved on and now I totally regret it ,
Only after 2 other dates with new girls did I realise I really really liked her
Of course when I called her she had heard from someone id been on other dates and now wants nothing to do with me ,So I totally messed that up and I'm a lil freaked about it,

maudgonner

yourdeadwright wrote: »

I had 2 dates recently with the same girl from Tinder ,both went really well,
Second date we end up being a bit bold, So I thought this is great pick up great looking girls go for a few dates ,have fun and move on to the next,
So I told her I didn't want anything serious and moved on and now I totally regret it ,
Only after 2 other dates with new girls did I realise I really really liked her
Of course when I called her she had heard from someone id been on other dates and now wants nothing to do with me ,So I totally messed that up and I'm a lil freaked about it,

I guess chalk it up to experience? TBH, you couldn't have expected things to go much differently, really.

Sure the next time you find someone you really like, you'll be in a better position to deal with it. Onwards and upwards

manonboard

yourdeadwright wrote: »

Only after 2 other dates with new girls did I realise I really really liked her
Of course when I called her she had heard from someone id been on other dates and now wants nothing to do with me ,So I totally messed that up and I'm a lil freaked about it,

I find it a little strange that she wants nothing to do with you because you dated some others? Its a bit odd like, of course you date other people, you were out looking for dates when you met her.
I can understand if her own feelings had moved on and she was into another, but it seems a tad 'punishy' to say no because you were with others.

Superhero1993

Ah I ****ing give up. I know I'm probably always giving out on here but whens you gots to vent you gots to vent why the **** can I not get any ****ing replies. Stuck up bitches and there not wanting to chat :P Let them give out about guys breaking their hearts all the want when they ditch them after they sleep with them. I am no longer gonna give a **** cos when a guy that wants something more comes by they blank him. *And Breath* I feel much better now carry on everybody

KomradeBishop

A female dating site user, dating multiple people at the same time - any criticism of this, gets a very defensive response (not something I would criticize either) - a male dating site user, dating multiple at the same time - suddenly very much worthy of criticism...

The double standards when it comes to online dating, can be fairly minor and subtle - but they are aplenty.

maudgonner

manonboard wrote: »

I find it a little strange that she wants nothing to do with you because you dated some others? Its a bit odd like, of course you date other people, you were out looking for dates when you met her.
I can understand if her own feelings had moved on and she was into another, but it seems a tad 'punishy' to say no because you were with others.

He went out with her twice, and they slept together (presumably). He then decided there were plenty of fish in the sea (no PoF pun intended), so he could do better, and ended things with her.

Then discovered there were not plenty of other fish in the sea after all, so tried to get back with her. If I was her it wouldn't exactly have made me feel great to know he decided to settle for me after all.

I know he wasn't trying to be hurtful, but it certainly wasn't the nicest way to handle things. But as I say, we all live and learn from stuff like that.

KomradeBishop

That's not what he said at all - you completely rephrased what he said, into something totally different.