Online dating

21-05-2016 3:42pm

fin12 wrote: »

I honestly don't know anymore, I'm just finding it hard to connect with anyone, I just find online so intimidating. I don't know what to do anymore.

I suppose I'm just lonely.

Ah I understand that fin. Can I ask do you have many close relationships in your life?

KERSPLAT! · 21-05-2016 3:50pm

http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/simpsons/images/1/14/Zweig.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20071203001337

fin12 · 21-05-2016 3:52pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Ah I understand that fin. Can I ask do you have many close relationships in your life?

Not really, I feel sometimes that I need to be alone but then at the same time I would like to have company. I'm still in contact with my ex who isn't Irish and Nobody approved, I felt racism from a lot of people when I told people where he was from I practically had to keep the relationship a secret, the stress and pressure of that is horrible. i can't even explain people's reactions towards me about him.

21-05-2016 4:02pm

KERSPLAT! wrote: »

http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/simpsons/images/1/14/Zweig.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20071203001337

Shup you! Smart boy

21-05-2016 4:10pm

fin12 wrote: »

Not really, I feel sometimes that I need to be alone but then at the same time I would like to have company. I'm still in contact with my ex who isn't Irish and Nobody approved, I felt racism from a lot of people when I told people where he was from I practically had to keep the relationship a secret, the stress and pressure of that is horrible. i can't even explain people's reactions towards me about him.

The reason I ask is because we sometimes look to fill gaps in out lives with intimate relationships. If we have no close family or friends then having a partner becomes a very attractive prospect indeed.

I know that it's not easy for a lot of people to just go in to a bar on their own. Once upon a time I wouldn't have dreamed of doing it. There's no guarantee that it will garner a positive result on the dating front but what it will do is increase your confidence. You'll feel good about doing something out of your comfort zone.

fin12 · 21-05-2016 4:17pm

Deleted User wrote: »

The reason I ask is because we sometimes look to fill gaps in out lives with intimate relationships. If we have no close family or friends then having a partner becomes a very attractive prospect indeed.

I know that it's not easy for a lot of people to just go in to a bar on their own. Once upon a time I wouldn't have dreamed of doing it. There's no guarantee that it will garner a positive result on the dating front but what it will do is increase your confidence. You'll feel good about doing something out of your comfort zone.

Ok thanks Persepoly.

:)

21-05-2016 4:20pm

fin12 wrote: »

Ok thanks Persepoly. :)

Just take it easy. You'll get there

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 21-05-2016 4:21pm

Perse, you're so good/wise with advice.

Them: I'm having relationship problems.
Me: have you tried drinking excessively?

I'll come to your class on life advice

21-05-2016 4:24pm

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Perse, you're so good/wise with advice.

Them: I'm having relationship problems.
Me: have you tried drinking excessively?

I'll come to your class on life advice

Now if only I could apply my advice to myself I'd be feckin laughing. Instead I'm a bit messy inside

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 21-05-2016 4:27pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Now if only I could apply my advice to myself I'd be feckin laughing. Instead I'm a bit messy inside

Have you tried drinking excessively?

Ah no.

Any dates anyone?

21-05-2016 4:28pm

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Have you tried drinking excessively?

Ah no.

Any dates anyone?

Yes and I have the bruises to prove it

Tell me how · 21-05-2016 5:04pm

Deleted User wrote:

Yes and I have the bruises to prove it

I'm not sure if Persepoly has the bruises from excessive drinking or from dates.

Shint0 · 21-05-2016 5:17pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Yes and I have the bruises to prove it

Well done, Persepoly. You obviously gained something from the thread

21-05-2016 5:36pm

I'll tell you all a little secret

Many beverages were consumed on Thursday night and I ended up falling on my ass. Such a lightweight. The bruise is massive and it hurts to walk.

I'm an eejit.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 21-05-2016 5:41pm

sounds like a good night! If walking is difficult!

21-05-2016 5:43pm

LexieOnRale wrote: »

sounds like a good night! If walking is difficult!

Walking is difficult because of the bruise!

Witchie · 21-05-2016 5:55pm

So have been ghosted again by American fooker.

All was going so well. He was ringing me and messaging non-stop.

I just don't get it.

Probably coz I wouldn't send him nudie pics. Feck sake.

Am so fed up of being let down.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 21-05-2016 6:04pm

if someone asks for a nudey pic, it's time to be saying see ya after. Ghost them first

KERSPLAT! · 21-05-2016 6:05pm

Witchie wrote: »

So have been ghosted again by American fooker.

All was going so well. He was ringing me and messaging non-stop.

I just don't get it.

Probably coz I wouldn't send him nudie pics. Feck sake.

Am so fed up of being let down.

I understand your frustration but I'm sure you realise that you're better off without if that is the reason.

21-05-2016 6:16pm

KERSPLAT! wrote: »

I understand your frustration but I'm sure you realise that you're better off without if that is the reason.

I couldn't agree more with this.

Witchie it seems you want something real. A guy who gets the huff because you won't send him naked pics of you isn't the type of person you want.

You want to feel special and to be with someone who you want to make feel special

Witchie · 21-05-2016 7:04pm

LexieOnRale wrote: »

if someone asks for a nudey pic, it's time to be saying see ya after. Ghost them first

Aw it was (at least I thought!) only messing. We jokingly were sending pics like his legs in the bath, me in the shower but you could only see my face, just messing.

He is a whovian too and I sent him a pic of my tardis necklace which nestled at the top of my completely covered cleavage and he was saying lucky tardis. Just a bit of flirting but he never demanded pics. He did say once he would love some and I said the only way he could have some where if he took them himself.....he lives in New Jersey, wasn't gonna happen for a long long time if ever!

So I don't think he took the huff as such as we were still flirting and enjoying each other's company until he went home from work early with his sore knee (an old injury flared up) and had taken some pain killers that left him a bit zonked. I could hear it in his voice. That was a week ago. I sent him a message a few days later saying I hoped he was ok, but no reply so have left it at that.

Mister Vain · 21-05-2016 7:23pm

Have you ever really loved someone?

tomwaterford · 21-05-2016 7:30pm

Mister Vain wrote: »

Have you ever really loved someone?

No (I'm too selfish

)...but I do loves me county

(For all those who wonder what that's about ......YouTube it

)

21-05-2016 7:33pm

Mister Vain wrote: »

Have you ever really loved someone?

Yes. Have you?

Witchie · 21-05-2016 7:44pm

Mister Vain wrote: »

Have you ever really loved someone?

Yes. Really really loved.

Also been in love a few times.

Mister Vain · 21-05-2016 8:03pm

Witchie wrote: »

Yes. Really really loved.

Also been in love a few times.

So there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone? I never did get that one.

Tell me how · 21-05-2016 8:16pm

Mister Vain wrote:

So there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone? I never did get that one.

Of course. Platonic love versus romantic love is the context.

FortySeven · 21-05-2016 8:17pm

Mister Vain wrote: »

So there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone? I never did get that one.

Massive difference.

I've tried both.

Penny Tration · 21-05-2016 8:23pm

Mister Vain wrote: »

So there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone? I never did get that one.

Of course. I love my best friend. I'm in love with my boyfriend. Aside from the fact that I don't shag my best friend, there are differences.

My boyfriend sees me in a vulnerable state if I'm feeling down, a side I wouldn't show any friend.

He looked after me when I had food poisoning on holiday, instead of me hiding how ill and gross I was, as I'd do with a friend.

he knows my fears, dreams, some of my deepest secrets, all things my friends would only know the basics of.

I can tell him "oh hey, I'm gonna try get a therapist," and he just knows me enough to say "okay, I'm here if you need anything," instead of getting "omg are you ok, talk to me?!" in a hysterical tone.

He knows me better than my friends do. My best friend could tell by looking at me if I'm feeling down, but my boyfriend could tell why I'm feeling down, and whether I need a cuddle or time to myself.

There's just a huge sense of intimacy. When you're in love, they truly know you, more than your friends ever will, IMO

21-05-2016 8:28pm

My best friend knows me more than anyone. Even when I was in a relationship it was always her that knew me best. She knows my vulnerabilities and when I'm not doing so good.

I have been in love. I've experienced that love deepen and grow. Yet funnily enough it has been a long time since I felt able to show all parts of me while in a relationship.

Online dating

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