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Online dating

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    #2402
    cantdecide
    Registered Users Posts: 11,465 ✭✭✭✭cantdecide


    Deleted User wrote: »
    How do you mean? If they spied you standing at a bar would that be any different?

    Possibly- liking someone's body language for example but I mainly mean in the context of getting to know someone through a friend, or from work or meeting at a party. Just because someone dismisses you in the context of online dating because you're not photogenic or because one of you has made some misguided profile errors shouldn't mean much to ones self worth. OD is just a platform and has limitations.


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    #2403
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Deleted User wrote:
    I wonder is it something about your profile. Do you mind me asking what site you use?

    POF. I've had someone actually do up my profile for me on Boards.ie after I showed it to them.
    I'm trying to get physically fit cos that seems to be all women in their 20's want nowadays. (Sadly not joking)


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    #2404
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Silverman, without sounding harsh, that's on you not a random woman. You can't go around like eeyore from Winnie the Pooh and expect women to throw themselves at you because you feel like you can't get out and about much.

    What do you need to do to make things happen for yourself? What would you need to improve? I don't know you so I can't answer.

    If I were single and struggling to find a relationship, taking a good look at myself now -- let's see, off putting things.
    - dramaqueen
    - moody
    - quick tempered
    - stubborn
    - unpredictable

    What mans going to put up with those dramatics before getting to know me? Nobody. I'd need to sort myself out, keep calm, stop getting myself worked up for no reason etc etc, rather than think everyone else had a problem with me when it's not true.

    If you're finding it hard to meet people out and about, why is that?
    What could you do to be a little more confident?
    Recognise your strengths and your weakness.


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    #2405
    tomwaterford
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,768 ✭✭✭✭tomwaterford


    Silverman. wrote: »
    POF. I've had someone actually do up my profile for me on Boards.ie after I showed it to them.
    I'm trying to get physically fit cos that seems to be all women in their 20's want nowadays. (Sadly not joking)

    A really bad reason to get fit/change anything to impress someone else...(like how long would ya keep it up)


    If you like/enjoy it go for it (you prob will)...but never be a second rate version of someone else


    You see a lot of people who get pure into it and then end up with someone and let themselves go...why??


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    #2406
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    cantdecide wrote: »
    Possibly- liking someone's body language for example but I mainly mean in the context of getting to know someone through a friend, or from work or meeting at a party. Just because someone dismisses you in the context of online dating because you're not photogenic or because one of you has made some misguided profile errors shouldn't mean much to ones self worth. OD is just a platform and has limitations.

    None of it, meeting in real life or online should have any impact on a person's self worth.

    And that's at the core of all of this. Your attitude, how you view yourself, how you sell yourself, the type of language you use, all of that being positive is dependent on your self-esteem. If that's low or fragile then dating and relationships are going to be very difficult.


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    #2407
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    LexieOnRale wrote:
    Silverman, without sounding harsh, that's on you not a random woman. You can't go around like eeyore from Winnie the Pooh and expect women to throw themselves at you because you feel like you can't get out and about much.


    Thats unfair. Not once did I say I expected them to throw themselves at me.


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    #2408
    fin12
    Registered Users Posts: 10,934 ✭✭✭✭fin12


    Silverman. wrote: »
    I know what ya mean but its constantly being blanked yano. I think online dating is a waste of time for guys, I'm only on it cos I'm not fit to get out meeting woven that often ATM.

    Silverman I wouldn't take it personally at all if u don't get reply's to your messages, people have plenty of reasons for not replying, might not be in the right mind for dating, might have decided not to do online anymore but their profile is still active.

    I don't think I'm suited to online really at all, I've attempted it a tiny bit but I can't seem to figure out what the other person is like or then I wouldn't be the most confident person as well either so I'd have my own doubts going on as well.


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    #2409
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    You need to build yourself up Silverman and I don't mean physically.

    Slow down with the looking for love. Work on yourself and concentrate on the things that make you happy.


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    #2410
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Thats unfair. Not once did I say I expected them to throw themselves at me.


    Insinuating women in their 20s want physically fit men "sadly true" and judging them for same is unfair. You obviously want women in their 20s. You can't help who you're attracted to. You can't blame other people for that. It is what it is.


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    #2411
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    I am in my 20's and I have observed countless women (friends, acquaintances etc) drooling over guys that are in physically good shape even though they treat them like crap.


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    #2412
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    But that's what they're attracted to? Are they obliged to settle for someone they don't find appealing just to be treated with respect?

    Would you date a 55 year old woman if you were both each other's types and she would treat you well?


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    #2413
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    LexieOnRale wrote:
    But that's what they're attracted to? Are they obliged to settle for someone they don't find appealing just to be treated with respect?
    That's what I'm saying, its sad that a woman would let herself be disrespected just to be with someone like that.
    LexieOnRale wrote:
    Would you date a 55 year old woman if you were both each other's types and she would treat you well?

    Cop on, theres no comparison there.


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    #2414
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Why not? Why is it ok for you to have certain standards but shallow of women to have certain standards?

    Not all physically fit 20 something year olds are disrespectful. It's an unfair representation.


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    #2415
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    LexieOnRale wrote:
    Why not? Why is it ok for you to have certain standards but shallow of women to have certain standards?

    Sorry what standards did I said I had?


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    #2416
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Sorry what standards did I said I had?


    20odd year old women


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    #2417
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    LexieOnRale wrote:
    20odd year old women

    Ah would you cop on, I'm in my 20's thats why I said that.


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    #2418
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Ah would you cop on, I'm in my 20's thats why I said that.

    And are the women you're interested in physically fit?


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    #2419
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Ah would you cop on, I'm in my 20's thats why I said that.

    What type of woman would you like to meet Silverman?


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    #2420
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    LexieOnRale wrote:
    And are the women you're interested in physically fit?


    No. I never said that.


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    #2421
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Deleted User wrote:
    What type of woman would you like to meet Silverman?

    Mainly a woman that's mad craic and just a joy to be around.


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    #2422
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Silverman. wrote: »
    No. I never said that.

    Okay. I'm not getting into it anymore than I have.


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    #2423
    Andre 3000
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,488 ✭✭✭Andre 3000


    Ye should go on First Dates Ireland lads ;)


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    #2424
    BlondeMoment
    Closed Accounts Posts: 142 ✭✭BlondeMoment


    Andre 3000 wrote: »
    Ye should go on First Dates Ireland lads ;)

    Oh god, its bad enough trying to get the person on the date to like you, nevermind with the whole of Ireland watching, ending up on Joe.ie the next day because of something stupid you might have said , and it turning into a hashtag on Twitter!


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    #2425
    Andre 3000
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,488 ✭✭✭Andre 3000


    BlondeMoment wrote: »
    Oh god, its bad enough trying to get the person on the date to like you, nevermind with the whole of Ireland watching, ending up on Joe.ie the next day because of something stupid you might have said , and it turning into a hashtag on Twitter!

    Ah sure you might be a secret comedic genius that the nation will love though!

    I was very close to submitting an application for the next series myself, more to do with people pushing me to do it rather than me being willing to do it. I'd love to do it for the craic as blind dates are brilliant but I don't trust my mouth in the company of alcohol and a woman and having that televised could end up with my mother getting a heart attack!


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    #2426
    BlondeMoment
    Closed Accounts Posts: 142 ✭✭BlondeMoment


    I would actually like to go on it, just to see who their team of matchmakers paired me up with, would be interesting!

    Yer man from Cork who was on this weeks episode, jasus there was something seriously attractive about him. I wish I were on that date!


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    #2427
    Andre 3000
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,488 ✭✭✭Andre 3000


    BlondeMoment wrote: »
    I would actually like to go on it, just to see who their team of matchmakers paired me up with, would be interesting!

    Yer man from Cork who was on this weeks episode, jasus there was something seriously attractive about him. I wish I were on that date!

    It's because he was from Cork, we're all like that :p

    Ah but na, he was very smooth to be fair.


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    #2428
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    I was accepted as a background dater on first dates Ireland but chickened out haha


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    #2429
    tomwaterford
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,768 ✭✭✭✭tomwaterford


    Silverman. wrote: »
    I was accepted as a background dater on first dates Ireland but chickened out haha

    Would it have been a blind date????


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    #2430
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    tomwaterford wrote:
    Would it have been a blind date????


    Yeah, exact same as the ones on camera just not recorded. Like the ones around the couples that are focused on.


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    #2431
    BlondeMoment
    Closed Accounts Posts: 142 ✭✭BlondeMoment


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Yeah, exact same as the ones on camera just not recorded. Like the ones around the couples that are focused on.

    Thats interesting. How/why do they pick certain people for the camera then?


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