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Online dating

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    #2702
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    PandaX9 wrote:
    With all due respect, you could have the body of Adonis but if you've the face of Shrek then I doubt many women will be going shlurp. But that applies to vain people.

    PandaX9 wrote:
    A handsome face is more important than a shredded body. Don't change yourself for others, do it because it makes you happy.


    Ah ffs so were bukt if ur not handsome? Haha ah here


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    #2703
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Ah ffs so were bukt if ur not handsome? Haha ah here

    No. What does "handsome" even mean? Something different to everyone :)


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    #2704
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Banter/personality is key!
    Then looks.

    He can be beautiful, but will he appreciate my deep throating skillz when it comes to beer bong?? All well and good him being nice to look at if you're not on the same page for craic


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    #2705
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Deleted User wrote:
    No. What does "handsome" even mean? Something different to everyone

    I would genuinely love to send a selfie of myself to 100 random women to see what they wud rate me out of 10. It would give a good idea of where your at lol


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    #2706
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    I would genuinely love to send a selfie of myself to 100 random women to see what they wud rate me out of 10. It would give a good idea of where your at lol

    Why does it matter what rating you are given? :)


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    #2707
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Deleted User wrote:
    Why does it matter what rating you are given?


    To see if its the looks or maybe I need to be more forward on a night out or in general etc


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    #2708
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    To see if its the looks or maybe I need to be more forward on a night out or in general etc

    I'm going to hazard a guess here Silver and say that you need the external validation of women in order to feel good about yourself.


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    #2709
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 18,749 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Coppers is the best. The shame that lingers the entire next day but the craic that night is the best. I always end up in coppers when I'm out in Dublin.

    The worst 'nightclub' in Dublin by a mile!

    It's like the worst ****hole disco in a crappy little country town , multiplied by 5 or 6.
    Horrendous .
    Cannot understand how it has this legendary status at all!

    Unless it's just because it's a meat market....


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    #2710
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    bubblypop wrote: »
    The worst 'nightclub' in Dublin by a mile!

    It's like the worst ****hole disco in a crappy little country town , multiplied by 5 or 6.
    Horrendous .
    Cannot understand how it has this legendary status at all!

    Unless it's just because it's a meat market....

    It's also great craic :)


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    #2711
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Deleted User wrote:
    I'm going to hazard a guess here Silver and say that you need the external validation of women in order to feel good about yourself.


    Well I'm not gonna lie, have never been approached in the past so would be nice for a change. Haha but seriously, its not that big a deal or anything, just would be nice.


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    #2712
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    bubblypop wrote: »
    The worst 'nightclub' in Dublin by a mile!

    It's like the worst ****hole disco in a crappy little country town , multiplied by 5 or 6.
    Horrendous .
    Cannot understand how it has this legendary status at all!

    Unless it's just because it's a meat market....


    The heart likes what the heart likes. Well start off in the classy places, but always make our way to harcourt street for the very end of the night! It's not even to score, it's just great craic.


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    #2713
    Penny Tration
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,687 ✭✭✭✭Penny Tration


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Well I'm not gonna lie, have never been approached in the past so would be nice for a change. Haha but seriously, its not that big a deal or anything, just would be nice.

    Tbh, women don't generally approach men, though obviously some (myself included) do. I'm not much older than you and at your age, it'd be very rare for a girl to approach a guy.


    Really though, why not approach people? If you're not trying, you can't complain that you're getting nowhere. The awkwardness and fear of rejection are feelings women have too, you're not alone in that. But you suck it up and do it anyway. Chances are over time it'll improve your confidence.


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    #2714
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Well I'm not gonna lie, have never been approached in the past so would be nice for a change. Haha but seriously, its not that big a deal or anything, just would be nice.

    I'll hazard another guess and say it really is quite the big deal. That you think a lot about what you must be doing wrong. How you say to yourself that "no woman will ever want me". You think of ways you can change in order to be successful. Not a day goes by when you don't have one or all of those thoughts.

    I'm telling you now Silverman sort your self-esteem out before you go looking for a relationship.


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    #2715
    mickmackmcgoo
    Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 950 ✭✭✭mickmackmcgoo


    Silverman. wrote:
    I would genuinely love to send a selfie of myself to 100 random women to see what they wud rate me out of 10. It would give a good idea of where your at lol

    And if it came back that you are a 9 how will that change your approach to girls? Just tell yourself you're a 9 anyway, be more confident and don't try too hard . Just strike up a normal conversation with a girl and if there is a spark there then the flirting and banter will follow.


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    #2716
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Penny Tration wrote:
    Tbh, women don't generally approach men, though obviously some (myself included) do. I'm not much older than you and at your age, it'd be very rare for a girl to approach a guy.
    That's true.
    Penny Tration wrote:
    Really though, why not approach people? If you're not trying, you can't complain that you're getting nowhere. The awkwardness and fear of rejection are feelings women have too, you're not alone in that. But you suck it up and do it anyway. Chances are over time it'll improve your confidence.

    I have tried quite a lot in the past but its not easy for some people, ya can't just say suck it up.


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    #2717
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    mickmackmcgoo wrote:
    And if it came back that you are a 9 how will that change your approach to girls? Just tell yourself you're a 9 anyway, be more confident and don't try too hard . Just strike up a normal conversation with a girl and if there is a spark there then the flirting and banter will follow.


    Tbh I couldn't give a ****, I'd just sit around all day with a smile from ear to ear :D


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    #2718
    Penny Tration
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,687 ✭✭✭✭Penny Tration


    Silverman, I mean this with the utmost sincerity and respect but have you considered some counselling or even self help techniques for improving your confidence?

    Based on your posts here, even the jokey ones, it's seems to be non-existent and women notice that immediately. With your confidence so low, and being hung up on your friend, you don't seem in a good position to date.

    Women aside, doing something to improve your confidence for yourself will stand to you. You'll feel a thousand times better about yourself and that results in being less hung up on things like dating, and more focus on being happy.


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    #2719
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Penny Tration wrote:
    Silverman, I mean this with the utmost sincerity and respect but have you considered some counselling or even self help techniques for improving your confidence?

    Penny Tration wrote:
    Based on your posts here, even the jokey ones, it's seems to be non-existent and women notice that immediately. With your confidence so low, and being hung up on your friend, you don't seem in a good position to date.

    Penny Tration wrote:
    Women aside, doing something to improve your confidence for yourself will stand to you. You'll feel a thousand times better about yourself and that results in being less hung up on things like dating, and more focus on being happy.

    Haha I could I suppose. I know ye may not think it but my lack of confidence doesn't show cos I am a bit of a header when around women. Like constantly cracking jokes and tbh my confidence isn't low around women, its more when I think whether they would like me etc.


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    #2720
    Penny Tration
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,687 ✭✭✭✭Penny Tration


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Haha I could I suppose. I know ye may not think it but my lack of confidence doesn't show cos I am a bit of a header when around women. Like constantly cracking jokes and tbh my confidence isn't low around women, its more when I think whether they would like me etc.

    Tbh it has to be worth a try. My confidence was so bad a few years ago that I avoided even leaving the house, and now I love myself :pac:

    The lack of confidence about yourself in general will be obvious, trust me. I was the jokey, fun, chatty, bubbly girl, always smiling and cracking jokes. Yet everyone knew I had no confidence. It's just one of those things you can sense tbh.


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    #2721
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Penny Tration wrote:
    The lack of confidence about yourself in general will be obvious, trust me. I was the jokey, fun, chatty, bubbly girl, always smiling and cracking jokes. Yet everyone knew I had no confidence. It's just one of those things you can sense tbh.


    Tbh I disagree cos when I said it to a few different women that I got close to as friends that I'm not the most confident with women, they all couldn't believe it from how I act.


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    #2722
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    Haha I could I suppose. I know ye may not think it but my lack of confidence doesn't show cos I am a bit of a header when around women. Like constantly cracking jokes and tbh my confidence isn't low around women, its more when I think whether they would like me etc.

    It doesn't matter whether you are jokey or not around women. In fact cracking jokes doesn't equal being confident and in some cases actually mask lack of confidence.

    What matters is how you feel inside. In order to have a healthy relationship with another person it's vital that you have one with yourself. Now I'm longer in the tooth than you are Silverman but I remember very clearly my own struggles and the constant "there must be something wrong with me".


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    #2723
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    This thread reminds me of my fav meme.
    "Being single sucks. All I get to do is whatever the **** I want to do."
    :pac:


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    #2724
    Mec27
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 648 ✭✭✭Mec27


    I'd love to be on a fly on the wall when females come across my Tinder profile. Wonder what they comment?


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    #2725
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I can't actually think of what I miss the most about being in a relationship. I can however think of lots of things I don't miss. However that's because the not so nice bits happened a lot. There were some really horrible feelings. Plenty of hurt and tears.

    I remember after a very difficult few days ringing my ex because I really needed to talk. He had his kid at the time. He was short with me on the phone and then hung up. I was interfering in their time together you see. I cried buckets that night.

    Or feeling that I was on borrowed time thanks to a man's indecision. No you don't want to suddenly go slow because you believe that's the best way for the relationship to develop. It's because you have become uncertain and want to carry on until you make up your mind.

    Yet I'm still excited at the prospect of new love around the corner, or a while away or whenever it will appear. :)


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    #2726
    Silverman.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭Silverman.


    Deleted User wrote:
    I remember after a very difficult few days ringing my ex because I really needed to talk. He had his kid at the time. He was short with me on the phone and then hung up. I was interfering in their time together you see. I cried buckets that night.


    See a lot may think its naivety but I can't see myself ever doing that to a GF/wife. That wasnt a nice thing to do.


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    #2727
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Silverman. wrote: »
    See a lot may think its naivety but I can't see myself ever doing that to a GF/wife. That wasnt a nice thing to do.

    No but I loved him and while it hurt sometimes stuff just happens. We say things for different reasons.


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    #2728
    Mister Vain
    Registered Users Posts: 6,081 ✭✭✭Mister Vain


    At least when you're single you don't have to hold in your farts all the time.


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    #2729
    Jim Bob Scratcher
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,231 ✭✭✭Jim Bob Scratcher


    Mister Vain wrote: »
    At least when you're single you don't have to hold in your farts all the time.

    Don't forget more money in your pocket too.


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    #2730
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »
    Don't forget more money in your pocket too.

    I spent a fortune when I was last in a relationship. I hardly had it then and I certainly don't have it now. My ex had a good job but yet never had any money and when he did it went on his kid. I get that but jaysus we rarely did anything nice. I was definitely last in the pecking order.


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    #2731
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Nothing worse than someone that's tight with cash. You don't have to spend a fortune. There's lots of free stuff you can do but it'd get really old if it was a constant case of "sorry, I know it's only 30 euro for a cinema date but can't afford it this month!"


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