Manchester United Team Talk/Gossip/Rumours Thread 2016

bangkok

or just off to the local strip club...

Rayne Wooney

Someone dug up construction plans and apparently there's a secret tunnel under Mourinho's house

Coat22

Rayne Wooney wrote: »

Someone dug up construction plans and apparently there's a secret tunnel under Mourinho's house

I think there must be one under Carrington also down which VG escaped around 7 hours ago

Kerrydude1981

Where is Ed??

0gac3yjefb5sv7

zerks wrote: »

Rashford...... ......Martial
Zlatan

Now,that is a front 3.



https://twitter.com/Ladbrokes/status/734745988628402176

This is class news.

Maximus Alexander

Kerrydude1981 wrote: »

Where is Ed??

Probably taken to bed with the nerves after having to tell LVG he's sacked.

spiralism

Manutd_4life wrote: »

I honestly don't know why people are so butt hurt over us being beaten to his guy's signature when the majority here have hardly heard of this guy never mind seeing him play. Every CEO in the world of football has lost out on a deal - what's the big deal??

It's not like we lost out to any old numpties either, it was to ****ing Bayern. Him going to City or Chelsea would have been a lot harder to swallow.

Kylo Ren

Jose Mourinho is the Manchester United manager.

Sorry, I just had to type it out. It's so weird.

sjb25

Coat22 wrote: »

I think there must be one under Carrington also down which VG escaped around 7 hours ago

LVG Still in his office cctv here

Korat

Ed is in for a busy few weeks of noodle advertising sales in China. Guardiola to City is old news and the arabs don't really care about marketing Man City as a brand but Mourinho taking over Utd and the first games being in the Qin Chinese homeland, it's going to be a busy time for the Mr. Woodward.

On the plus side Mourinho and Mendes can decide the transfer strategy unimpeded by the Glazer's lapdog.

sjb25

sjb25 wrote: »

LVG Still in his office cctv here

Lol probably signed a new contract

RobertKK

It would be funny if Ibrahimovic did have a great career at United and then successful in a coaching role, with PSG having named a stand after him.

Everyone knows that PSG has never made any player legendary. It would look like homage to a United player :P

Maximus Alexander

M!Ck^ wrote: »

Lol probably signed a new contract

At this stage I wouldn't be able to avoid PMSL if that was the case.

Vic Vinegar

v3ttel

M!Ck^ wrote: »

Lol probably signed a new contract

For a penthouse in the Algarve, hopefully...

Lord TSC

Reports in Spain saying we have had a £29m bid turned down for Varane.

Trigger

Jaysus this Jose fella works quickly, not even in the door and has already signed Zlatan and is bidding for Varane.

ScummyMan

Lord TSC wrote: »

Reports in Spain saying we have had a £29m bid turned down for Varane.

Double it I'd say would be more realistic

Korat

Lord TSC wrote: »

Reports in Spain saying we have had a £29m bid turned down for Varane.

If you've just humiliated a legendary coach and a major football club you'd think a super-agent would pick a lower figure to leak as an opening gambit.

I hope Jose comes in and tells him to go f*ck himself because he now has the contacts and means to go around him.

MagicIRL

Varane is injured, out of the CL Final and a doubt for the Euros too. Sounds like United alright! :pac:

Mitch Connor

Korat wrote: »

If you've just humiliated a legendary coach and a major football club you'd think a super-agent would pick a lower figure to leak as an opening gambit.

I hope Jose comes in and tells him to go f*ck himself because he now has the contacts and means to go around him.

What? Woodward is leaking to Italian papers? Yeah..... Sure.

Kerrydude1981

Zlatan is on the plane

http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/man-utd-mourinho-live-updates-11370565

Lord TSC

Wonder will they have Ibra and Jose together at the first pressed then.

Trigger

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1067890003285546&id=100001936684329

54and56

Korat wrote: »

I hope Jose comes in and tells him to go f*ck himself because he now has the contacts and means to go around him.

Can you decipher for the rest of us who don't speak Korat?

Mr.Nice Guy

Ibra in a Man United jersey excites me as much as RVP, and his first season at United was immense. Fingers crossed.

RobertKK

Zlatan stats for the past 10 seasons.

06/07 Inter Milan 36 games, 15 goals, 8 assists
07/08 Inter Milan 34 games, 22 goals, 11 assists
08/09 Inter Milan 47 games, 29 goals, 12 assists
09/10 Barcelona 45 games, 21 goals, 13 assists
10/11 AC Milan 42 games, 22 goals, 12 assists
11/12 AC Milan 44 games, 35 goals, 12 assists
12/13 PSG 46 games, 35 goals, 17 assists
13/14 PSG 46 games, 41 goals, 17 assists
14/15 PSG 37 games, 30 goals, 8 assists
15/16 PSG 51 games, 50 goals, 19 assists

Not too shabby.

0gac3yjefb5sv7

Mr.Nice Guy wrote: »

Ibra in a Man United jersey excites me as much as RVP, and his first season at United was immense. Fingers crossed.

Imagine Martial and Rashford behind him. Would be unreal.

Trigger

So according to Instagram Zlatan is on a plane heading to destination unknown.. has anyone cracked out flight radar yer

brinty

jesus Christ
Jose isn't even at the club an already we're playing horny football
Zlatan and Varane....
who's next...

MagicIRL

Superthread to Futureguy..., Superthread to Futureguy..., come in..., over.

Coat22

Almost time to wander off home which means an announcement should be made in the time it takes for me to make it to the car (5 minutes)

RobertKK

brinty wrote: »

jesus Christ
Jose isn't even at the club an already we're playing horny football
Zlatan and Varane....
who's next...

Pogba given we seem to be doing business with Mino Raiola now, same agent as Ibrahimovic.

brinty

RobertKK wrote: »

Pogba given we seem to be doing business with Mino Raiola now, same agent as Ibrahimovic.

Stop it
just stop it now

its getting to be too much....

Trigger

RobertKK wrote: »

Pogba given we seem to be doing business with Mino Raiola now, same agent as Ibrahimovic.

Could be an "I'll get you Pogba if you sign Zlatan superdeal"..

IamtheWalrus

Should one board the positivity tractor?

raze_them_all_

varne bid rejected

brinty

IamtheWalrus wrote: »

Should one board the positivity tractor?

why aren't you on board already...
#choochoo

Rayne Wooney

Madrid don't lose players to us, there 0% of Varane moving

You can quote that

Trigger

IamtheWalrus wrote: »

Should one board the positivity tractor?

I reckon we can upgrade it to a train again now..

Strumms

You'd have to wonder how tough it would be doing business with Madrid after the DDG transfer saga and how that ended, got to be fresh in their minds. Unless they actively wanted to shift on a player I can't see them being that amiable at all. Nice to see us going after Varane though, think he'd be a great partner for Smalling at the back, one that could drag on over the summer though.

brinty

Rayne Wooney wrote: »

Madrid don't lose players to us, there 0% of Varane moving

You can quote that

did you ask FutureGuy if you could say something like that....
He has dibs on saying when we're not signing players

Manutd_4life

RobertKK wrote: »

Zlatan stats for the past 10 seasons.

06/07 Inter Milan 36 games, 15 goals, 8 assists
07/08 Inter Milan 34 games, 22 goals, 11 assists
08/09 Inter Milan 47 games, 29 goals, 12 assists
09/10 Barcelona 45 games, 21 goals, 13 assists
10/11 AC Milan 42 games, 22 goals, 12 assists
11/12 AC Milan 44 games, 35 goals, 12 assists
12/13 PSG 46 games, 35 goals, 17 assists
13/14 PSG 46 games, 41 goals, 17 assists
14/15 PSG 37 games, 30 goals, 8 assists
15/16 PSG 51 games, 50 goals, 19 assists

Not too shabby.

He seems to get better with age. Plays more games and scores more goals. Could be an immense signing.

The thought of having Fellaini and Ibra in the same box would be a nightmare to defend against. Both extremely rash and aggressive players. :P:P

Maximus Alexander

The latest in bleeding edge journalism has informed me that Mourinho has just had take away delivered from Salmontini. :rolleyes:

jayo26

Take a look at @BeardedGenius's Tweet: https://twitter.com/BeardedGenius/status/734777954438418432?s=09

Jose is having dinner guys.

RobertKK

Zlatan is currently training with the Swedish national team.

I do think United will go for Pogba.
Reasons are: not every top player wants to move to live in Manchester, Pogba said he loves Manchester and visits quite regularly by all accounts.
Another is, he made the UEFA team of the season (same time when Ballon dor is announced) which is the type of player United aspire to having - the best.
He scores goals from midfield and provides lots of assists.
I also think United will put getting success above the embarrassment that signing him back for a record fee for a midfielder would bring, however justified or not the criticism would be.
They will know this transfer window is where Pogba will most likely move to a new club, so it is now or a very long time...or never.
We will have to wait and see.

brinty

apparently Zlatan is trolling us and training in Sweden
the little scally wag...

v3ttel

RobertKK wrote: »

Zlatan is currently training with the Swedish national team.

I do think United will go for Pogba.
Reasons are: not every top player wants to move to live in Manchester, Pogba said he loves Manchester and visits quite regularly by all accounts.
Another is, he made the UEFA team of the season (same time when Ballon dor is announced) which is the type of player United aspire to having - the best.
He scores goals from midfield and provides lots of assists.
I also think United will put getting success above the embarrassment that signing him back for a record fee for a midfielder would bring, however justified or not the criticism would be.
They will know this transfer window is where Pogba will most likely move to a new club, so it is now or a very long time...or never.
We will have to wait and see.

I think we'll just ignore Paul Pogba's existence as much as possible.

"Hey, we let this guy go for free, but let's pay £60m to get him back"

thomasj

Maximus Alexander wrote:

The latest in bleeding edge journalism has informed me that Mourinho has just had take away delivered from Salmontini.

Stomach-turning isn't it?!

jayo26

Could you imagine woodward doing the apprentice fuk sake the episodes would he hours long.