Sociopaths

Bongalongherb

Melisandre121 wrote: »

Not sure if you will answer this OP, and apologies if it's offensive; but given your lack of empathy and need to control do you think you could kill someone? Have you ever thought about it?

That's why I asked the question... did any-one here do the psychopath test yet

indioblack

Bongalongherb wrote: »

That's why I asked the question... did any-one here do the psychopath test yet

Yes - and I'm almost normal - almost.

PARlance

Bongalongherb wrote: »

That's why I asked the question... did any-one here do the psychopath test yet

Got 50% in the too... jack of all trades.

Wonzy

Made up term for people who are just high horse ignorant arse holes, e.g 90% of people who post in the motors and accomadation forum.

poa

indioblack wrote: »

How do you feel about this - ruining someones career for example.

Apathetic.
It's just revenge, evening up the score. The same as when takes care of some business. Feelings and empathy don't come into it.

poa

Melisandre121 wrote: »

Not sure if you will answer this OP, and apologies if it's offensive; but given your lack of empathy and need to control do you think you could kill someone? Have you ever thought about it?

My ex was the first to say to me I could shoot someone stone dead and carry on eating my dinner as if nothing had happened.
Before then, I hadn't considered it.
But if I am honest, yes I could kill. I would get a rush from the power of it.
What stops me is the penalty for doing so. Would I kill if I knew I could get away with it? Yes, I would.
I don't feel guilt or remorse the same way that others do. Empathy is something I understand, but just don't feel.
I could take a life and sleep well as normal, sure as night follows day.
For example, I ran over a fox in my car and killed it. When I got out to check was it dead I felt nothing either way. My only concern was there any damage done to my car. A normal person would have felt sad or upset I suppose.
But my ex thought it was odd I didn't even mention it after. She asked me how did I get the dent in my car. She couldn't believe my apathetic reaction when I told her I killed a fox as if nothing happened.
We just have a killer instinct that others don't have. I would climb over others to survive no problem.

donegaLroad

poa wrote: »

Apathetic.
It's just revenge, evening up the score. The same as when takes care of some business. Feelings and empathy don't come into it.

see #49

Samaris

poa wrote: »

Apathetic.
It's just revenge, evening up the score. The same as when takes care of some business. Feelings and empathy don't come into it.

You are obviously aware of it enough that you can identify it in yourself. Like a person with autism who knows that they do not process certain information the same way as others, but can learn to do so - and want to do so, not for personal gain, but because they feel it's a better way to live - would you or do you actually try to overcome these impulses for the sake of others, or do you relish in it?

Two Tone

Wonzy wrote: »

Made up term

Think it's a medical diagnosis, but it can be misused all right.

Two Tone

Two Tone wrote: »

Think it's a medical diagnosis, but it can be misused all right.

The medical diagnosis is Anti-Social Personality Disorder, psychopath isn't a term that's actually used.


On this thread it seems to mean anyone who has difficulty relating, or is a bit of a heartless git.

Sariah

I'm an empath and can usually feel a sociopath from 100 yards. They are not connected to the emotion they are mimicking. I feel quite uneasy around them. They do not seem to like me or try to control me. I prefer to think of myself as the cream. I want to get to the top but I want to bring everyone with me and do it through ability and expertise.

Sariah

Sariah wrote: »

I'm an empath and can usually feel a sociopath from 100 yards. They are not connected to the emotion they are mimicking. I feel quite uneasy around them. They do not seem to like me or try to control me. I prefer to think of myself as the cream. I want to get to the top but I want to bring everyone with me and do it through ability and expertise.

Is this a psychic ability?

poa

donegaLroad wrote: »

having a quick read at this and your opening post OP, I think you are too open about yourself to be a sociopath. A true sociopath will never drop their guard about how they really feel inside, even 'anonymously' on an internet forum... for what purpose would someone do this? Why are you telling us about yourself like this OP?

I think some do, some don't. Often I will drop my guard and play the victim card in order to lure someone in under my control. When one displays vulnerability it is alluring and disarms ones opponent. Then one ramps up the charm when they have been weakened and their will broken. I can go from passive to aggressive in an instant, from poacher to gamekeeper, prey to predator when needed. A sociopath will go through the gears when needed to get what they want. Being open or closed is meaningless if the end is justified by the means. Why would someone do this? Why does anyone do anything? There doesn't always need to be a modus operandi. People post on forums, just for the sake of it. Why am I telling you? Why not? Revealing ones secrets is of interest to others, hence all the replies so far.
I abhor I am a sociopath, but that is what I am. I share the interest in my kind like many on here. I see it as both a curse and a gift at times. One can use it as an advantage in some professions, but it comes at a cost in personal relationships. I am 39 and on my 30th birthday my ex said that by 40 I would either end up in jail or the grave due to it.
So with one year to go, I have nearly proved her wrong on that one. For me that is all I am really concerned about. One cannot fight what one is.

Sariah

No, but I take an emotional read off people when I meet them. I don't pay much heed to what they are saying but instead look to connect emotionally. I am very open emotionally which can be very draining but I don't seem to have a filter with which to protect myself. It's probably the opposite end of the spectrum.

indioblack

poa wrote: »

I think some do, some don't. Often I will drop my guard and play the victim card in order to lure someone in under my control. When one displays vulnerability it is alluring and disarms ones opponent. Then one ramps up the charm when they have been weakened and their will broken. I can go from passive to aggressive in an instant, from poacher to gamekeeper, prey to predator when needed. A sociopath will go through the gears when needed to get what they want. Being open or closed is meaningless if the end is justified by the means. Why would someone do this? Why does anyone do anything? There doesn't always need to be a modus operandi. People post on forums, just for the sake of it. Why am I telling you? Why not? Revealing ones secrets is of interest to others, hence all the replies so far.
I abhor I am a sociopath, but that is what I am. I share the interest in my kind like many on here. I see it as both a curse and a gift at times. One can use it as an advantage in some professions, but it comes at a cost in personal relationships. I am 39 and on my 30th birthday my ex said that by 40 I would either end up in jail or the grave due to it.
So with one year to go, I have nearly proved her wrong on that one. For me that is all I am really concerned about. One cannot fight what one is.

Would it not be contradictory to say you abhor what you are?

Sariah

Sariah wrote: »

No, but I take an emotional read off people when I meet them. I don't pay much heed to what they are saying but instead look to connect emotionally. I am very open emotionally which can be very draining but I don't seem to have a filter with which to protect myself. It's probably the opposite end of the spectrum.

How do you know what you're feeling is really being experienced by the other person?

I assume you don't ask them.

Bongalongherb

Well, if every-one was a sociopath, civilisation would have ceased to exist a long time ago. Thankfully most folk can feel and associate themselves to the planet and what's in it to have empathy for other living beings.

Sociopaths, I can spot them a a long way away, and when I come across one I ignore them and move on to more interesting folk.

Very crafty they are indeed, just like Dracula was

Melisandre121

Sariah wrote: »

No, but I take an emotional read off people when I meet them. I don't pay much heed to what they are saying but instead look to connect emotionally. I am very open emotionally which can be very draining but I don't seem to have a filter with which to protect myself. It's probably the opposite end of the spectrum.

I'm very much the same

Melisandre121

Bongalongherb wrote: »

Well, if every-one was a sociopath, civilisation would have ceased to exist a long time ago. Thankfully most folk can feel and associate themselves to the planet and what's in it to have empathy for other living beings.

Sociopaths, I can spot them a a long way away, and when I come across one I ignore them and move on to more interesting folk.

Very crafty their are indeed, just like Dracula was

What stands out to you about them? Is it not difficult to discern due to their superficial charm? I'd love to be a good enough judge of character to be able to spot one - I'm sure I've encountered a few over the years.

Sariah

If someone hurts their leg I feel the pain, like I feel it physically in my own leg. If someone is in emotional pain I feel that too. Obviously with strangers i don't always say it to them directly but with plenty of people i do. It is very tiring and draining as if I go into a meeting with a room of people that's a whole lot of emotional energy to process. I can sometimes feel very overwhelmed by it but it means I am good at negotiating and bringing people along.

poa

indioblack wrote: »

Would it not be contradictory to say you abhor what you are?

No more than an alcoholic saying he abhors he is one. Often people abhor what they are. My mother for example was a lesbian. In the 1960's she married my father to try and hide it from her family; as it wasn't as accepted as it is now.
She had to fake her life and it made her very bitter. Playing the part of the happy housewife married for 50 years with 2 kids. But it's all been a lie.
My father knows of course, and they do love each other. But she has had secret partners over the years. She knows what she is, and abhors it. Reason being she was indoctrinated in a convent to think being gay was dirty and a sin. She can't deprogramme all that Catholic guilt and indoctrination even now. So you see, lots of people abhor what they are, even when they can't do anything to change it. Contradiction? No. Reality? Yes.

indioblack

poa wrote: »

No more than an alcoholic saying he abhors he is one. Often people abhor what they are. My mother for example was a lesbian. In the 1960's she married my father to try and hide it from her family; as it wasn't as accepted as it is now.
She had to fake her life and it made her very bitter. Playing the part of the happy housewife married for 50 years with 2 kids. But it's all been a lie.
My father knows of course, and they do love each other. But she has had secret partners over the years. She knows what she is, and abhors it. Reason being she was indoctrinated in a convent to think being gay was dirty and a sin. She can't deprogramme all that Catholic guilt and indoctrination even now. So you see, lots of people abhor what they are, even when they can't do anything to change it. Contradiction? No. Reality? Yes.

In your case, though, where does the pressure come from to make you hate that part of yourself?

Sariah

But surely having the degree of self awareness that you do have allows you to behave in a different way? So even if you don't feel empathy for others surely you understand how to act in a way that is respectful and considerate of others. Tbh I would think self awareness is a more important trait to have. It gives you a choice.

poa

indioblack wrote: »

In your case, though, where does the pressure come from to make you hate that part of yourself?

My father left Ireland for London in 1960 aged 17 with £10 to his name and a small suitcase of clothes. He retired at 65 a millionaire. Being a sociopath helped him do the work of 2 men and he rose up through the ranks from apprentice to managing director over 40 years. But it came at a cost to his health. He is now f.ucked. Is he happy? No. Does he have any friends? No.
My mother is the only one that stood by him. He cut everyone else off over the years as many sociopaths do.
So the pressure comes from that, I see myself now at 39 becoming him at 71.
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. My sister at 50 is burned out just like he was. The genes are there, one cannot fight it whether one abhors oneself or not.

Sariah

Sariah wrote: »

But surely having the degree of self awareness that you do have allows you to behave in a different way? So even if you don't feel empathy for others surely you understand how to act in a way that is respectful and considerate of others. Tbh I would think self awareness is a more important trait to have. It gives you a choice.

A person with schizophrenic or bipolar disorders know they have these conditions. It isn't as simple as choosing alternative behaviour/ feelings, even if you know, on an intellectual plane, that you have this condition.

A schizophrenic will tell you he has schizoprenia, and in almost the same breath, can assure you that the Special Branch are after him, and that his mother is a secret agent.

Mental illness does not operate in accordance with lucid reason. That's why it's mental illness.

corner of hells

Did you'se see that episode of the Simpson's, where Homer gets cloned in a possessed hammock ?

This thread reminds me a little of it..... D'oh .

indioblack

poa wrote: »

My father left Ireland for London in 1960 aged 17 with £10 to his name and a small suitcase of clothes. He retired at 65 a millionaire. Being a sociopath helped him do the work of 2 men and he rose up through the ranks from apprentice to managing director over 40 years. But it came at a cost to his health. He is now f.ucked. Is he happy? No. Does he have any friends? No.
My mother is the only one that stood by him. He cut everyone else off over the years as many sociopaths do.
So the pressure comes from that, I see myself now at 39 becoming him at 71.
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. My sister at 50 is burned out just like he was. The genes are there, one cannot fight it whether one abhors oneself or not.

You think it's unavoidable?

poa

Sariah wrote: »

But surely having the degree of self awareness that you do have allows you to behave in a different way? So even if you don't feel empathy for others surely you understand how to act in a way that is respectful and considerate of others. Tbh I would think self awareness is a more important trait to have. It gives you a choice.

Its like a drug addict is aware they are a drug addict, and the effect that has on people; but they still take drugs. One cannot change what one is. I don't feel empathy, but I know what it is. I can pretend to and fake it, but its just an act to get what I want.
Psychologically I mirror people and project their own personality back on them.
So they fall for my charm, as its like themselves. I become them, mirroring everything from their tone of voice to their breathing to disarm and control them. Once I have charmed and weakened their will, I take control of them and manipulate them. I let them think I am the victim and vulnerable, and they are the predator. Then I take more control and get what I want. When they have given me what I want, I cut them off; as they have served their purpose and are now of little of no use to me. The thrill of the chase has gone and the dopamine rush fades away.
Sociopaths can act empathetic so one would never know. We are the best actors and liars one could ever meet. My ex often said I would win an oscar for my lying to her and acting.
The thing is, the only time I feel threatened is when I meet someone more intelligent than I am. They can see what we are, and they are harder or impossible to manipulate and control. So we seek out the weaker vulnerable types as they are easier to control.
I am self aware, but it won't fix me. If there was medication or psychotherapy to stop being a sociopath I would take it to be honest; but nothing cures it. Like I have said before, its both a gift and a curse.

Sariah

I would have considered aspd to be a personality disorder as opposed to a mental illness.

People with bi polar can and do learn to manage the illness. I know my mother has done so. She knows her triggers and knows when to get help. she may not always be in full control but she has learned to reduce the times that she is not.

indioblack

poa wrote: »

Its like a drug addict is aware they are a drug addict, and the effect that has on people; but they still take drugs. One cannot change what one is. I don't feel empathy, but I know what it is. I can pretend to and fake it, but its just an act to get what I want.
Psychologically I mirror people and project their own personality back on them.
So they fall for my charm, as its like themselves. I become them, mirroring everything from their tone of voice to their breathing to disarm and control them. Once I have charmed and weakened their will, I take control of them and manipulate them. I let them think I am the victim and vulnerable, and they are the predator. Then I take more control and get what I want. When they have given me what I want, I cut them off; as they have served their purpose and are now of little of no use to me. The thrill of the chase has gone and the dopamine rush fades away.
Sociopaths can act empathetic so one would never know. We are the best actors and liars one could ever meet. My ex often said I would win an oscar for my lying to her and acting.
The thing is, the only time I feel threatened is when I meet someone more intelligent than I am. They can see what we are, and they are harder or impossible to manipulate and control. So we seek out the weaker vulnerable types as they are easier to control.
I am self aware, but it won't fix me. If there was medication or psychotherapy to stop being a sociopath I would take it to be honest; but nothing cures it. Like I have said before, its both a gift and a curse.

What was their purpose? Not money or sex or even power as such.
Well, maybe power - the knowledge that you have manipulated a bit of the world.

darkpagandeath

Apparently I'm a psychopath according to online. Prob borderline socio. Have not killed anyone yet :P

poa

indioblack wrote: »

You think it's unavoidable?

Well I am no psychiatrist as I have stated before, but I have looked into treatment for it. If I thought medication or psychotherapy would cure it I would take it. But one cannot cure it. Some sociopaths do well, and others don't.
My sister is one for example; happily married for 20 years with 2 kids and a successful barrister. She has a social circle of friends; and one would never know. But at 50 she is already burned out, and has been unable to bond with her kids due to lacking empathy for their feelings. She doesn't have any maternal instinct whatsoever. Her husband takes on the mother and father role of nurture as best he can, and her nanny does the rest.
She is turning into our father the older she gets, and so am I if I am honest. I really think being a sociopath is genetic; not learned behaviour. One can make changes to an extent, but its just an act, and sooner or later one reverts back to true type; ruthless, controlling, and lacking empathy.

Sariah

The thing is you can't act empathetic with an empath as if you are not feeling it then they will pick up on that. If the feeling is not there then it can't be picked up on. It won't matter what words you speak or mind games you play. If someone understands the world through emotions and stores every interaction they have in life in an emotional bank then they will feel you a mile off.

poa

indioblack wrote: »

What was their purpose? Not money or sex or even power as such.
Well, maybe power - the knowledge that you have manipulated a bit of the world.

Often there is no purpose at all. Its just the thrill of the chase; getting control over someone is a dopamine rush. Charming and manipulating them. Once they are at that point, they are cut off and one moves onto the next one. Its rather like an addict craving the next hit of a drug. Scoring the fix is exciting, but after actually getting it the dopamine rush quickly fades away. Sociopaths experience a similar withdrawal, I feel the lowest of lows if I fail to control someone. But the highest of highs if I succeed.

Sariah

I'd be the opposite. It would eat me up if I thought I got my way through manipulation or control or power. The more I succeed in life the more power I give away. I always try to lift others up the pedestal I have vacated.

poa

Sariah wrote: »

The thing is you can't act empathetic with an empath as if you are not feeling it then they will pick up on that. If the feeling is not there then it can't be picked up on. It won't matter what words you speak or mind games you play. If someone understands the world through emotions and stores every interaction they have in life in an emotional bank then they will feel you a mile off.

They don't have to be an empath. My ex was the first to tell me I am a sociopath, she could see it immediately. I could not control her as she was more intelligent than me. When I tried to psychologically mirror her and project she knew I was doing it and did it back to me. But she was sharper than me, and better at it. She isn't a sociopath, but just highly intelligent; and this fascinated me and made me feel threatened at the same time. Usually I would cut someone off if I can't charm them and get control; but with her I found the thrill of the chase intoxicating. I was in awe of her gifted mind and insight. Some pick up on us being a sociopath, often after they have been hurt or used by one. Once bitten twice shy. But often I find the vulnerable types actually seek that in a man. They actually need to feel dominated and controlled. They know its wrong but it turns them on to have a man use them. Human nature I suppose, a victim seeking a predator.

Bongalongherb

But that is all it is... A superficial charm of which can be spotted a mile away and also with their constant lying if you are wise enough to notice, which is easy over time.

The charm of bullsh!t they come out with will alert your instinct to open up and after 5 minutes of the sociopath talking, you will know straight away especially when you point out to the person that they are wrong, and in most cases they are mostly wrong. Keep looking at their eye's when they talk this bullsh!t to try and get you into bed, and then just say that your dog died earlier with a tear in your eye and said sociopath will squirm like a worm with a dead look in his/her eyes while looking robotic with no feelings at all and the sociopathic person will stand up and say they have to leave for some other thing, just lies again cause they don't feel anything...

Sociopaths prey on weak people and often stay away from equally strong people, they look for people who are sad, insecure, or looking for a meaning in life because they know that these people are soft targets. In other words, a person with unmet needs, is a person that can be more easily manipulated through those unmet needs. Check to see if the person is great at getting other people to do what he or she wants.

True sociopaths will slowly gain dominance and control over a person without the person realizing it. They like to be in control of every situation and are uncomfortable being around other strong people. They are always worried about being exposed.

When strong people are around, they are afraid to get caught. They will keep distance, and from a distance, make small contact with the 'strong' person, to see if they are noticed. However, Sociopaths like to prey on the strongest people they can deceive, remain unseen, or exposed from, just like some government politicians when citizens get angry. Once they feel exposed, they will play their trump cards, or get out... always on an excuse that doesn't make sense.

Much of their dominance they gain through psychological warfare, creating dependency of the other person upon themselves. Like a venom, their game plan is to weaken people over time. They figure If they can remain unseen, they can stay out of harms way.

poa

Sariah wrote: »

I would have considered aspd to be a personality disorder as opposed to a mental illness.

People with bi polar can and do learn to manage the illness. I know my mother has done so. She knows her triggers and knows when to get help. she may not always be in full control but she has learned to reduce the times that she is not.

I would agree that being a sociopath isn't a mental illness. I actually went to a psychiatrist and they said that I am perfectly healthy. At the time I thought it might be Borderline Personality Disorder or Schizophrenia. It was only later when I met my ex, that she told me I am a sociopath. I would agree its a personality disorder. Some manage it well, my sister doesn't seem to have a big problem as she is a barrister and happily married. The lack of empathy in her job isn't a problem. It is with her kids and husband though.
In the fiscal sense I did OK in my profession, but my lack of a wife and kids is very telling at 39. My one true friend that I haven't cut off thinks I am the most dangerous and complex person they have ever met. He said if I rang him up and told him I had killed someone he wouldn't be one bit surprised.
I think that is the true test really, could you kill someone? Yes or no.
A normal person would not be able to. But sociopaths can no problem.
We just don't have that feeling holding us back from doing things that others do.
I was dangerously overtaking in my car once, and my ex told me to stop as she was scared we would both be killed. She couldn't believe I didn't feel the risk or fear of crashing that a normal person would. I felt nothing about the consequences of having a head on collision. My heart rate was low and I felt relaxed. This is the kind of confidence and lack of fear, the coldness that makes us able to succeed in life where others fail. We just don't hold back.

Harry Angstrom

poa wrote: »

I would agree that being a sociopath isn't a mental illness. I actually went to a psychiatrist and they said that I am perfectly healthy. At the time I thought it might be Borderline Personality Disorder or Schizophrenia. It was only later when I met my ex, that she told me I am a sociopath. I would agree its a personality disorder. Some manage it well, my sister doesn't seem to have a big problem as she is a barrister and happily married. The lack of empathy in her job isn't a problem. It is with her kids and husband though.
In the fiscal sense I did OK in my profession, but my lack of a wife and kids is very telling at 39. My one true friend that I haven't cut off thinks I am the most dangerous and complex person they have ever met. He said if I rang him up and told him I had killed someone he wouldn't be one bit surprised.
I think that is the true test really, could you kill someone? Yes or no.
A normal person would not be able to. But sociopaths can no problem.
We just don't have that feeling holding us back from doing things that others do.
I was dangerously overtaking in my car once, and my ex told me to stop as she was scared we would both be killed. She couldn't believe I didn't feel the risk or fear of crashing that a normal person would. I felt nothing about the consequences of having a head on collision. My heart rate was low and I felt relaxed. This is the kind of confidence and lack of fear, the coldness that makes us able to succeed in life where others fail. We just don't hold back.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGPcSd7DDLk

poa

Bongalongherb wrote: »

But that is all it is... A superficial charm of which can be spotted a mile away and also with their constant lying if you are wise enough to notice, which is easy over time.

The charm of bullsh!t they come out with will alert your instinct to open up and after 5 minutes of the sociopath talking, you will know straight away especially when you point out to the person that they are wrong, and in most cases they are mostly wrong. Keep looking at their eye's when they talk this bullsh!t to try and get you into bed, and then just say that your dog died earlier with a tear in your eye and said sociopath will squirm like a worm with a dead look in his/her eyes while looking robotic with no feelings at all and the sociopathic person will stand up and say they have to leave for some other thing, just lies again cause they don't feel anything...

Sociopaths prey on weak people and often stay away from equally strong people, they look for people who are sad, insecure, or looking for a meaning in life because they know that these people are soft targets. In other words, a person with unmet needs, is a person that can be more easily manipulated through those unmet needs. Check to see if the person is great at getting other people to do what he or she wants.

True sociopaths will slowly gain dominance and control over a person without the person realizing it. They like to be in control of every situation and are uncomfortable being around other strong people. They are always worried about being exposed.

When strong people are around, they are afraid to get caught. They will keep distance, and from a distance, make small contact with the 'strong' person, to see if they are noticed. However, Sociopaths like to prey on the strongest people they can deceive, remain unseen, or exposed from, just like some government politicians when citizens get angry. Once they feel exposed, they will play their trump cards, or get out... always on an excuse that doesn't make sense.

Much of their dominance they gain through psychological warfare, creating dependency of the other person upon themselves. Like a venom, their game plan is to weaken people over time. They figure If they can remain unseen, they can stay out of harms way.

I concur.
One thing I do to make someone believe me is to maintain 100% eye contact when I lie. I use a technique that criminals use in police interview rooms. Rather than look into their eyes, I stare at their eyebrows all the time which makes it easier not to blink. They mistake this for eye contact and think I must be telling the truth as I am not looking away or down as a liar does. Often it works, and I slow the speed of my speech but increase the volume to make it more sincere delivered with more gravity. It's rather like putting someone under a spell. Mirroring their phrases, breathing, tone, mannerisms also weakens them. Its like they are talking to themselves, and who would one trust more than oneself? Cultivating new relationships is no problem, maintaining them is. The lack of interest in them when they have served their purpose means the act is exhausting to keep up. It becomes a bore rather than a thrill. Its time to cut them off and move on to fresh meat.
If one picks up that the charm isn't delivering the goods then reverse psychology can work to break their will. I will often play the victim card and warn them how it feels to be violated by a sociopath and user. I become the victim and let them imagine being my predator. Nothing gains trust faster when they see the vulnerable victim like a helpless child. Then it's time to sink one's meat into one prey and finish the job. Where there's a will, and there's a will, then there's a way, and there's a f.ucking way.

Sariah

Ha I could kill someone but it would be a crime of passion, not in cold blood. And I would feel extreme remorse. If I thought had made someone's day, even a strangers, worse instead of better, it would eat away at me. I have no ability for duplicity. If I even think something bad about someone I have to tell them.

I still reckon I'd give you a run for your money though.

poa

Sariah wrote: »

Ha I could kill someone but it would be a crime of passion, not in cold blood. And I would feel extreme remorse. If I thought had made someone's day, even a strangers, worse instead of better, it would eat away at me. I have no ability for duplicity. If I even think something bad about someone I have to tell them.

I still reckon I'd give you a run for your money though.

Well I think me confessing I am a sociopath gives you an edge don't you!
Its not all doom and gloom, I have had some fun in my life. If I had the choice I would be normal and not a sociopath. Married with 2 kids and a steady job.
I have worked hard and done enough, but as I get older it bugs me that at 39 all I have to show for my efforts is an apartment. It all seems irrelevant if one cannot pass it on to one's kids.
My father has the same problem. He is a millionaire but unhappy. He was happier when broke to be honest.
My mortgage is paid, and so is my sisters; so its not like we need the inheritance. His work ethic has been pointless really.
So being a control freak or manipulator isn't anything to be proud of. If anything it is more of a curse than a gift.
When my best friends mother passed away he came round to my home broken for a chat. I found it difficult to feign any interest in what he was saying at all. F.uck him, is all I could think. What will I have for my dinner tonight? My eyes just glazed over with apathy.
I know that isn't normal, but I really felt nothing for his grief. I actually wanted to laugh at the state if him, so weak, so vulnerable, I thought to myself. He is a sheep not wolf that one. He will never make it past being a footsoldier.
When I cut both my parents off 16 years ago I felt apathy. It's like they are already dead to me. So I just see grief as a waste of one's time. Although I did take 2 weeks off work paid leave. My old boss still thinks they are dead, but I enjoyed the holiday and still kept my full annual leave after.
I have to confess, I did enjoy getting the sympathy for my loss from some of the women. Poor old me.

Bongalongherb

That part of the brain for emotions is just minimized or non-existent for these folk. Is that a blessing or a fault ?. Pain and feeling others pain is a right bastard of a feeling, but for certain folks that don't have these feelings... lucky you. I can't even imagine what it would be like to have no feelings at all for others or animals or for that matter other living things.

Being honest, I don't have a problem with sociopaths because I don't associate with them, but in saying this, I cannot hate them, because that is just the way they are regarding their brain/mind make-up, it's just that many folk have feelings and some with deeper feelings, and some folk with none. It's interesting though regarding both. It's still hard to picture having no feelings though. You are who you are regardless. and as such move along accordingly.


And I'll say it again...

It's a crazy world but I live here...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9LwR8Hadg4

poa

This one sums me up better.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ckv6-yhnIY

PistolsAtDawn

poa wrote: »

To be honest I didn't diagnose myself. I am no psychiatrist.
My ex was a Doctor and she diagnosed it after years of observing my behaviour. Professionally in my career I don't think anyone knew as I was in a profession where one can be ruthless and controlling; lacking empathy. So it was seen as being good at the job. But of course unhealthy, and at 38 I knew my behaviour wasn't normal or sustainable at that level.
Behaving in a psychotic or control freak way in the engine room of a company while intoxicated with power isn't good for all concerned.
I had learned a lot of it from my father who worked his was up in a firm from apprentice to managing director of the company over 40 years.
But rather than remembering he came from nothing, he trampled over the little people like ants. They were just numbers on a payroll to him, not human beings with wives and kids etc.
My ex put up with it for far too many years really, partly due to her being attracted to it in men too much. But enough was enough and she realised that she couldn't change me, no more than I can.
It was only after she diagnosed me, that I realised what my father was. I thought, now I know where I get it from; my traits are his traits.
I don't know who is worse really? My sister seems to have it in her as well.
Academic, and successful in her profession; but totally lacking in empathy.
I thought I was cold and controlling, but I am like a sociopath-light version of her when it comes to controlling and dominant behaviour.
I think that is why my father and sister both get on so well, as its like a meeting of minds.
Ironically she doesn't see what she is at all, and will not admit it. I suppose some sociopaths know it, and some don't. In all cases we don't care though.
I always find it intoxicating when I meet another one though, its rather like a battle of wits. They try to mirror and project as I do, in order to take control and dominate. There is a certain sharpness and spark in the conversation that one just doesn't get with normal people.

Can you elaborate on what you meant by 'mirror and project'?

Sariah

How about humour? Do you enjoy a good laugh? Do you like witty people? Are you attracted to bright, energetic people? Do you get a kick out of small children and the way they view the world? Do you get ant pleasure from human company other than wanting to control or break it?

Sariah

The two of them end up trying to mirror and project the ego and behaviour of the other which must be quite commical when two people are mirroring and projecting a falsity with more falsity.

I find I mirror and project on a natural level but i hate when someone does it to me. My ego does not respond well to flattery. I think I would respond better if I was made to feel predatory as this is something would fear being and so would react quite strong to the accusation.

poa

Sariah wrote: »

How about humour? Do you enjoy a good laugh? Do you like witty people? Are you attracted to bright, energetic people? Do you get a kick out of small children and the way they view the world? Do you get ant pleasure from human company other than wanting to control or break it?

Yes to all.
Its just the dopamine rush from the thrill of the chase is the highest of highs for me. And I say that as someone that has taken E, cocaine, acid, ayahuasca, etc.
Controlling someone, using them, without caring; is so intoxicating.
I enjoy the usual pleasures in life, but when I say jump; and that person doesn't jump, they ask how high? That is the rush. Totally f.ucking mind control.
It doesn't matter if that is closing a deal in business or penetrating a woman; the pleasure is the same. The thrill of the chase is the dopamine rush.

Sariah

Jaysus I think I want me a bit of that.

poa

PistolsAtDawn wrote: »

Can you elaborate on what you meant by 'mirror and project'?

In simple terms, when one mirrors one reflects the other persons personality back at them. Projection is putting one own personality on them. You put your thoughts into their mind, rather like their own. One can project an image of what they want to see, and they believe fiction to be fact, lies to be truth.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But as the saying goes; a fool and his money are easily parted. In business this can be very true.