Child support question - ex taking me to court

Padraig1888

I pay maintenance every month for my child. Now she’s demanding more with an email there a few days ago. Emailed back saying just paid my car tax and I’ll revise it next month and up the payments. She came back and said no now, I know you’re earning this etc and I’m taking you to court. The figure she pulled is off to what I earn. How can someone through a solicitor find out what you earn? Even though I know she’s lying cause it’s off. Can’t be bothered with court and having to show payslips, I’ve faithfully paid her €350 a month without exception, why the issue now?

Wouldn’t mind but the mother is terminal with liver cancer which she knows so could do without the hassle.

Dravokivich

If the current arrangement is not by Court Order, you'll find yourself challenged a lot with this.

It doesn't need to be entirely in the courts if it's something that can be discussed candidly with the guidance of a mediator. Dolphin HSE provide a free mediation service and outcomes can be signed off by a judge.

Otherwise, she can submit the applications she wants, doesn't mean what she'll get is what she wants.

Either way you'll need to show earnings, expenses and what you are able to provide for your child. Just as she'll be required to present earnings, expenses and specifically for the child too.

Padraig1888

Dravokivich wrote: »

If the current arrangement is not by Court Order, you'll find yourself challenged a lot with this.

It doesn't need to be entirely in the courts if it's something that can be discussed candidly with the guidance of a mediator. Dolphin HSE provide a free mediation service and outcomes can be signed off by a judge.

Otherwise, she can submit the applications she wants, doesn't mean what she'll get is what she wants.

Either way you'll need to show earnings, expenses and what you are able to provide for your child. Just as she'll be required to present earnings, expenses and specifically for the child too.

Sounds fair so, pay 20% of my tax home pay, think that's fair and don't have too much to worry just going to court is a bummer

sammy2016

wow well done paying her 350e a month my friend was paying 275e a month and when his ex dragged him to court looking for more her payments were cut and he only had to pay her 43e a week..so she is risking getting money cut if she takes you to court

Hollister11

i'd tell here to go for it.

Unless you have a 7 figure net worth. I think €350 is more than fair. There her kids too, if she needs more money, work more hours.

cbyrd

I'd say let her go to court. I used to get E500 per month for 4 children, my eldest girl (17) moved in with her dad last year so he cut the maintenance to E375 a month for 3 children.
He's got a good job and refused to increase it even though losing the weekly payment I got for the eldest girl, her portion of the children's allowance and the reduction in the maintenance meant I couldn't afford my rent. I'm currently staying in a 2 bed apartment. We've gone to mediation about it but he refuses outright to increase it. Even explaining that technically myself and the 3 children are homeless (the place I'm staying in is part of a bankruptcy so I'm waiting to get notice to leave)
So court it is. He got redundancy last year (36,000) and was out of work for 3 months. In mediation he told me all that money is gone. He used it to keep himself for the few months he was out of work. So.. all in all I think she has a very generous maintenance.
Our divorce won't be final until next year.

sword1

Thankfully have no experience of this but from reading the other answers i think an email back saying you are unable to raise the amount and need to know when you are going to court as you will have to lower the payment to prepare to pay for costs involved if it goes ahead

Stealthfins

My exe brought me to court for more drink money lol seriously,she was naive enough to say she's entitled to more money to go out from Thursday to Sunday night.

The judge cut her maintenance by 40% and suggested rehab....

It doesn't always go the mother's way,I was paying 90 a week,the judge knocked it back to 50.

The maintenance is for the kid and not the mother.

draiochtanois

This post has been deleted.

cbyrd

Stealthfins wrote:

The maintenance is for the kid and not the mother.

If you're married and separate, until the divorce is final there is a responsibility to the main carer of the children to be maintained... Ie, if I am at home caring for the children and unable to work (it wouldn't pay me with childcare costs) there's a duty on my ex husband, until I am no longer his wife , to pay maintenance to both me and the children. This doesn't apply unmarried parents.
Also, if I was working and he had the children, I would have to pay maintenance to him.
If he had 2 of the children then no maintenance would be liable from either of us.. it's also taken into consideration how much time the children are with each parent as this also affects the amount that is payable.
My ex cut my maintenance without a variance order so it has to go back to court and he could be liable to pay the arrears.
If it's not court ordered maintenance make sure you have a record of payments made, pay it direct into her bank account. keep a record of any additional payments you make, you don't want it levelled at you that you pay nothing..

kazmcdonald

Padraig1888 wrote:

I pay maintenance every month for my child. Now she’s demanding more with an email there a few days ago. Emailed back saying just paid my car tax and I’ll revise it next month and up the payments. She came back and said no now, I know you’re earning this etc and I’m taking you to court. The figure she pulled is off to what I earn. How can someone through a solicitor find out what you earn? Even though I know she’s lying cause it’s off. Can’t be bothered with court and having to show payslips, I’ve faithfully paid her €350 a month without exception, why the issue now?

I personally think what you are paying is fair. I took my ex to court, he didn't bother turning up and I got awarded a tenner a week!

Cabaal

Seems like a fair amount I have to say,
Leave her take the court route if she wishes, it may not pay off for her like she thinks, that or she's just calling your bluff