Are you from a well-to-do family?

Lollipops23

Certainly not- parents worked in retail when I was growing up. My mother was a single mother for several years (before she met my step dad), and she still gets emotional when she talks about trying to pay the mortgage and feed us during that time.
Later she sweated and worked her ass off to make sure we could have nice holidays every 2 years. Still managed to send me to college and paid off her mortgage early. She's retired to France now, living her dream. She bloody deserves it.

Surreptitious

celligraphy wrote: »

My father was a successful business man owned Many restaurants cars had a mobile phone when they first came out , my mother stayed at home to mind us ,lived in a terrible council house in a horrible estate . My father would give loans and money to anyone , while my mother sister and I were locked in the bedroom with no food or bathroom from the time he left for work until he came home to beat us all... So grew up terribly poor ,until he decided to leave

But now I'm doing great im happy with my life and so is my family

Jesus, that's terrible.

FizzleSticks

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Pac1Man

Why are people delighted to talk about the hard upbringing they have had whereas well to do families almost shamefully shy away from the discussion?

Corkgirl18

My parents work crazy hard and growing up we were never very well off but never wanted for anything either. They've had tough lives.
My dad lived in this town all his life so he knows pretty much everyone and is very well liked. If he needed something I'm sure someone would help him out and vice versa.
Not sure if this qualifies as "well-to-do" though.
He did get me a part time job when I needed it

Elliott S

Sh1tbag OToole wrote: »

For everyone who has a problem with it there's someone else who will shamelessly lick arse and become a lackey of the well off person. There are those who look up to them and give them so much leeway just because they're wealthy

So very true. It's rife and it's nauseating.

celligraphy

Surreptitious wrote:

Jesus, that's terrible.

Terrible but we are all doing ok now my mother even owns her own house first in her family to have done so 😊

Arcade_Tryer

I used to think I was.

Then I realised I was from a very lucky family. Like most people living relatively comfortable lives.

And yes, my family worked extremely hard too. Like most families.

beks101

I'll hold my hand up here. My parents were quite professionally successful and I had a great upbringing in a big house in a nice part of town, although I never grew up thinking we were well-off or had money to burn.

In truth we didn't - my parents were both really prudent and disciplined about their financial affairs from a young age, invested well and poured all of their money into the house, which in later years would come to be worth multiples of what it was built for. They both came from typically Irish catholic families, "one banana between the 7 of us on Christmas day", grandparents were all teachers and worked their backs off to make sure every single one of them was well-educated. They've all excelled.

In terms of "influence" - they have some very wealthy friends, my god father was a government minister, they'd be well-respected about the town but my mother is the most honest-to-god, Catholic guilt ridden soul you'll ever meet and my Dad is as understated as they come. Retrospectively I probably could have followed in my mother's professional footsteps (and be making a damn sight more than I am now as a measly journalist), but I was never raised to believe I could rely on anything other than hard work and grit to achieve anything.

It's only in latter years that I've come to appreciate how privileged my childhood was and how hard they worked and how careful they were with their money to be able to give us the best they could. My boyfriend is from a pure cockney working class London family and my life was like the partridge family compared to his. Both families are as thick as thieves when they get together though - despite mine being a hell of a lot more conservative and his being total utter hippies. They've got kindness and pure decency in common. That's something I've always seen in my parents first and foremost and that has always drawn me to other people in my life.

eviltwin

I'm from a working class family. My dad was the bread winner until a catastrophic car accident left him disabled when I was a toddler. We never had money. We were good kids though, my dad may not have had a penny to his name but he was the definition of a gentleman.

Sam Kade

Sh1tbag OToole wrote: »

The well-to-do family is a peculiar concept in Irish society and your actions will be judged by others taking into consideration on whether you're from a well-to-do family or not. No doubt the British are to blame for foisting this concept upon us with their elaborate class system they have back home.

Being from one also yields certain benefits. If you land up to the only manufactuerer of bouncy castles in the county looking to purchase a few bouncy castles for a bouncy castle rental business you're setting up you'll be given credit and discounts, where as yer man from the terrace who tries to buy a bouncy castle will probably be told to f*ck off. Likewise if you land up to the local FG TD for a favour or the priest for some indulgences the door is always open and you'll quickly be able to get things done.

If you have anything to offer you'll be on the preferred suppliers list for the local school, the GAA club, the church and the council. Even the local shops will be trying to buy stuff off you. Lads from well-to-do familes will have a horde of girlies chasing after them for the road frontage they're about to inherit, their contacts and political clout.

Have you leveraged the benefits of being from a well-to-do family, or know anyone who has? Perhaps maybe you have brought shame to one, or know a tale of someone from a well-to-do family who went rogue.

Anonymous poll so you can own up in peace

How much money property does a family need to be labeled well to do?

steddyeddy

To me well to do means happy and stable.

Arcade_Tryer

Ryder Tinkling Goth wrote: »

Nope, grew up in a flat in Ballymun. Left school when I was 13, was a little bollox for a few years.. Luckily got out of that environment by joining the army. Got lucky buying and selling a few houses and now live in a really nice area.

My kids are the first in my family to even finish secondary school!.. My son done an economics degree and is doing exceptionally well for himself and should never see a poor day.. My daughter is in her third year of her degree and she'll do similarly well for yourself.

So no, I'm not from a 'well to do' background. But I've broken out of that socio-economic background to set my kids up and no my grandchildren (when they start to arrive) can hopefully say 'Yes, I come from a well to do back ground'.

And yet none of that can compare to the feeling of all those thanks you're going to get!

MilesMorales1

I look down on all posh people so. Reverse snobbery for life :cool:

steddyeddy

I think people shouldnt have to say they were lucky to have worked hard and got a good job. The harder I work the luckier I get it seems. Everyone should be proud of making something of themselves.

Aurum

FizzleSticks wrote: »

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This comic is a great, succinct illustration of that privilege.

Arcade_Tryer

steddyeddy wrote: »

I think people shouldnt have to say they were lucky to have worked hard and got a good job. The harder I work the luckier I get it seems. Everyone should be proud of making something of themselves.

You can acknowledge that you are lucky to have been allowed to succeed without feeling ashamed for having done so. Both critiques can be done simultaneously. Of course people should be proud of making something of themselves and so on.

indioblack

looksee wrote: »

How can it be both a concept peculiar to Ireland, and the fault of the Brits at the same time?

Easily - this is After Hours.

Your Face

Tally-ho

Sh1tbag OToole

Sam Kade wrote: »

How much money property does a family need to be labeled well to do?

There is no absolute figure. Its probably more about how much money passes through the family than what they have

Static funds and property only help to a point

anewme

used to say our family put the funk into dis functional.

very poor growing up in West Dublin.Dad grew up in an Industrial school and carried a lot of baggage. Police always round at house over parents fighting. Rows daily. No food from Tuesday - Thursday (dole was paid Thursday) dad had gambling problem so money went on the Horses. He never attended stuff for us like Communions or Confirmations and we were dressed out of the second hand shop. Often no money for toys over Christmas. Not one family holiday.

Mum worked as a cleaner (I cleaned The men's jax) to put us through school.

Got a decent office job at 18 and have been working since. Always been a hard worker and Celtic Tiger was good to me. It's been a bit of a slog but now, own house in a good area(small mortgage) decent job, nice lifestyle, 2 holidays per year, new car every year, nice jewellery, & watches, pension, never worry about bills, bit of savings.

I describe myself working class made good.

But, the downside, and there always is one, is still single in my 40's. . Can't grow up like that and escape unscathed.

I don't dwell on it and life is good.

CruelCoin

Pac1Man wrote: »

Why are people delighted to talk about the hard upbringing they have had whereas well to do families almost shamefully shy away from the discussion?

They're not interested in the ugly **** that gets thrown at them. Mostly on a "well for you/silver spoon" vein.

Agricola

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8Kum8OUTuk

bnt

No. I didn't realise until years later how genuinely poor my family was when I was growing up. I never had any LEGO, for example: that was a "name brand" product that was too expensive, but I did get some cheap generic building blocks and was quite happy with them. I eventually got a bike, because some other family was throwing it away. A home computer? Fat chance.

RobertKK

Grew up on a farm, we weren't poor, we weren't rich, but never wanted for anything, had great parents who provided all we wanted, it was a very happy upbringing, close family, good neighbours, grew up in a most beautiful location so in that aspect we are well to do.

You see poverty elsewhere and then you realise how good your family have it.

Fox_In_Socks

No, we wouldn't have had a lot of money. Nor would we have been in any way "a well to do family" in the community. One of my parents died when I was young and the other parent and a sibling had mental issues. So, little in the way of nice things/experiences, but that's made me grow up to be not that materialistic which is good.

FizzleSticks

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FizzleSticks

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TSMGUY

I like to think I'm a from a "To-do well" family, by which I mean working-class but educated and full of aspiration. I come from a long line of intelligent but inexplicably poor people. Maybe I'll break the mold..... someday.

Corkgirl18

RobertKK wrote: »

You see poverty elsewhere and then you realise how good your family have it.

I couldn't agree more. I'm teaching in a very disadvantaged area surrounded by poverty.
Growing up and prior to teaching I just presumed that kids came to school after having the option of having breakfast and they'd get fed when they go home.
That if they had holes in their shoes or clothes they'd be patched/replaced.
That if they don't wash for a week a parent would tell them they had to.
Then I realised how naive I was.