Forum tone - let's make it more positive

Mrs OBumble

dloob wrote: »

I don't think anybody looking though this thread will have any problem figuring out what the problem is....

I don't think there's a problem!

People have different views. They discuss them. This is a good thing.

Yes, it's quieter than it was. But that due to a whole range of issues, including the response to the denial of service attacks, installation, economic recovery etc.

A forum full of Pollyanna Positivity would be far less interesting than one where a range of views are aired.

El_Dangeroso

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

I don't think there's a problem!

People have different views. They discuss them. This is a good thing.

Yes, it's quieter than it was. But that due to a whole range of issues, including the response to the denial of service attacks, installation, economic recovery etc.

A forum full of Pollyanna Positivity would be far less interesting than one where a range of views are aired.

It's a false dichotomy to imply that's the only alternative to the current state.

Just because you don't see a problem, just means you don't see it, lots of other people do and hesitate in posting as a result.

I'd also like to clarify TONE =/= CONTENT. You can have lots of negative topics discussed without the snark and patronising of the OP that I see a lot of on here.

beardybrewer

Eeden wrote: »

I actually don't understand the logic behind this. It's not the dicks that are a problem, it's the people who can't/won't engage with the dicks?!?

Really? It's a pretty well known idea. A “the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing” notion. Never give up, carry on (or you deserve what you get).

Arghus wrote: »

If you're asking me why anyone would be a dick to anyone else on a public forum, the answer is I don't fully know. There is undeniably a quasi dickish point scoring element to a lot of online debate. I think when it comes to posting online people often feel the need to make their point, often at the expense of those in opposition to what they are saying. Also anoynomity plays a part, along with the relative weightlessness of what a person may say online - in here we could face a certain level of consequences for acting the dick - a ban or a slap on the wrist - but that's really it. Act the prat in real life and things could be a lot harder for you.

It's interesting to imagine the change of tone if this were a site more like LinkedIn where it is tied to your real name and people you really know. Yet, I don't think it's so problematic nor think the tone of this forum is as dire as suggested. Maybe a few need to grow a thicker internet skin because this place is tame compared to the real world. However, I think the anonymity is two-fold is that it gives and it takes. People can say whatever sh!t they like and now and then they may hit upon an inspired idea they might not have posted otherwise. So anonymity isn't always bad.

El_Dangeroso wrote: »

Maybe if some of the posters that seem deeply passionate about a single topic were to also branch out and participate in some of the more lighthearted or alternative threads then it would help people not be so jaded when they see them posting about their favourite topic. If they don't then if just comes across as nagging and lecturing.

Reddit employs certain tags such as [serious] which imply an additional set of mod rules for a particular thread. This could potentially be a way to mark certain threads for a particular purpose if we could decide 2 or 3 tags with obvious rules such as [serious] = serious replies; limit taking the piss, [happy] = no moaning/snark - contribute towards the topic (e.g. xmas market), [debate] = no holds barred death match.

El_Dangeroso

beardybrewer wrote: »

Reddit employs certain tags such as [serious] which imply an additional set of mod rules for a particular thread. This could potentially be a way to mark certain threads for a particular purpose if we could decide 2 or 3 tags with obvious rules such as [serious] = serious replies; limit taking the piss, [happy] = no moaning/snark - contribute towards the topic (e.g. xmas market), [debate] = no holds barred death match.

I like this idea but it the Galway forum gets a lot of one-off casual OP's (eg where can I get this etc) so those rules might be a bit confusing.

Perhaps when things get a bit debatey on a thread that didn't start that way this could be siphoned off into a mega-thread. We could have one on each topic that has been done to death, one for traffic, one for cyclists vs. the world, one for moaning about the council's various mess ups.

Mrs OBumble

El_Dangeroso wrote: »

I'd also like to clarify TONE =/= CONTENT. You can have lots of negative topics discussed without the snark and patronising of the OP that I see a lot of on here.

Perhaps it might help us to understand what you mean if you provided some specific examples.

Because I'm really not sure exactly what is being complained about, and how you would prefer things to be.

Eeden

beardybrewer wrote: »

Really? It's a pretty well known idea. A “the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing” notion. Never give up, carry on (or you deserve what you get).

I'm thinking about the phrase "don't feed the trolls". It's surely not necessary to engage with every petty post, but there do seem to be more of them lately. They're not all reportable. Just ... negative and annoying.

And of course, you don't want to start quoting examples, because it then looks like you're singling out certain posters

Totally Tropical

J.pilkington wrote: »

I'm really disillusioned by this forum lately. The amount of negativity from select posters is shocking and its dominating the forum. Whinging, giving out, complaining about everything and anything even if it doesn't affect them in any way. So much of the posts are bad news, seems like they trive in it. It really looks like a lot of positive contributors have moved on which isn't helping the pace. Looking at the first page of the forum over half the threads are whingefests full of bickering (me included as I try to pull whingers up)

While the city / society will always have challenges we need to celebrate success, it's good for the mind and soul. Galway is doing a lot better than many other parts of the country so let's be more positive.

- It's summer
- we have an amazing city with history / culture that other cities and towns are envious of(and a lot of locals take for granted)
- Galway city is the gateway to Connemara
- Galway has a great community spirit (ya who would have thought! which can easily be seen from all of the cultural events which are organised (through dam hard work) and successfully take place
- Galway won 2020 bid
- Races are starting
- Town is packed with tourists providing a huge boost to the local economy
- we have beeches 10 mins away
- we had good weather two weeks ago!
- hurlers and footballers are doing well which raises the spirits of plenty of the city / county
- Olympics about to start
- Arts festival was great

Etc etc

So it would be better to have a board where everyone agrees with you and all alternative thoughts of view are censored.;) I find Galway to be a grand spot.A bit overrated i have to say and the natives can be a bit pompous and pretentious at times.The above post being an example.But all in all it's grand place and most of the people are sound.But i think it's a bit much to brand people who have a different opinion to yourself as whingers.;)

snubbleste

A person died in Galway and there is a thread on it. How do you suppose you spin that in a positive manner OP?

biko

I suppose by being respectful to the deceased and not get into some stupid argument in that thread.




On this topic - not all threads will be roses and puppies but at least stopping digs will go a long way I think.
Some posters will drag jokes/arguments from one thread to another which only inflames old grievances.
It may be "banter" for the poster doing it, but to the butt of the joke it may not be funny at all.

Moo Moo Land

snubbleste wrote: »

A person died in Galway and there is a thread on it. How do you suppose you spin that in a positive manner OP?

A good start would be to take the "ghoulish" element out of those kind of threads.

Gremlinertia

For me, and i will admit being thin skinned, i find how pedantic it gets here sometimes hard to take..

biko

Can you exemplify a little?
I know I can be awful pedantic sometimes.

Or just report anything and mods will take a look.
You can also PM if your prefer

Mrs OBumble

Moo Moo Land wrote: »

A good start would be to take the "ghoulish" element out of those kind of threads.

Can you be specific and tell us what, exactly, from that thread you would like to be different?


This passive-aggressive "we don't like how you're doing it, but we won't tell you what we don't like" is pretty difficult to respond to, either directly or by changing behaviour.

El_Dangeroso

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Perhaps it might help us to understand what you mean if you provided some specific examples.

Because I'm really not sure exactly what is being complained about, and how you would prefer things to be.

I'm fairly sure quoting specific examples would be against the charter. I could list off at least 5 recent examples but it would be singling out posters and would be skirting the line of bullying for real.

You either see an issue or you don't, if you don't that's fine! You're on here enough that even if I did post specific examples you'd feel compelled to argue there was nothing wrong, and that's really pointless. Suffice it to say enough people notice it for it to be a real thing.

Moo Moo Land

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Can you be specific and tell us what, exactly, from that thread you would like to be different?

This passive-aggressive "we don't like how you're doing it, but we won't tell you what we don't like" is pretty difficult to respond to, either directly or by changing behaviour.

I would rather not (because I know what would happen) and I am not passive-aggressive, thanks.

Edit: I had not even read the recent "Dangan death" thread before I posted. I do not have an issue with that thread whatsoever.

Moo Moo Land

El_Dangeroso wrote: »

I'm fairly sure quoting specific examples would be against the charter. I could list off at least 5 recent examples but it would be singling out posters and would be skirting the line of bullying for real.

You either see an issue or you don't, if you don't that's fine! You're on here enough that even if I did post specific examples you'd feel compelled to argue there was nothing wrong, and that's really pointless. Suffice it to say enough people notice it for it to be a real thing.

+1

Discodog

Maybe, for a while if Biko doesn't mind, people should report posts that they find offensive or that cause upset.

We all have different sensibilities & it's really the mods job to assess what is reasonable. People need to know if they are causing offence.

Mrs OBumble

El_Dangeroso wrote: »

I could list off at least 5 recent examples but it would be singling out posters and would be skirting the line of bullying for real.

Yet again - what is your definition of bullying?

Any definition I've ever seen includes a requirement for it to be repeated behaviour, carried out with the intention of negative consequences for the person on the receiving end.

El_Dangeroso

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Yet again - what is your definition of bullying?

Any definition I've ever seen includes a requirement for it to be repeated behaviour, carried out with the intention of negative consequences for the person on the receiving end.

I'm not entirely sure what point you are trying to make? As in do you just wish to convince people who think there's an issue with forum tone that there isn't?

nrb

As a reader regular reader of this board I wish the tone of every single post by Mrs o Bumbles were not condescending.

happyoutscan

nrb wrote: »

As a reader regular reader of this board I wish the tone of every single post by Mrs o Bumbles were not condescending.

Very easy to agree with this.

Mrs OBumble

nrb wrote: »

As a reader regular reader of this board I wish the tone of every single post by Mrs o Bumbles were not condescending.

Thanks for the feedback - it's good to finally hear something specific.

Have you got any suggestions about ways I could write things so that you don't experience them as condescending?

Also, if I really annoy you , there is an Ignore Poster function which you can use to ensure you never see anything by me again.

SB_Part2

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Thanks for the feedback - it's good to finally hear something specific.

Have you got any suggestions about ways I could write things so that you don't experience them as condescending?

Also, if I really annoy you , there is an Ignore Poster function which you can use to ensure you never see anything by me again.

Do you not think your last line alone is an example of you being condescending?

ben.schlomo

SB_Part2 wrote: »

Do you not think your last line alone is an example of you being condescending?

It's a valid point she makes, if the poster is that put out by Mrs OBumble then put her on ignore. I'd like to point out that I found that posters attack on Mrs OBumble to be very negative and I feel it brought the tone of this thread into disrepute.

SB_Part2

ben.schlomo wrote: »

It's a valid point she makes, if the poster is that put out by Mrs OBumble then put her on ignore. I'd like to point out that I found that posters attack on Mrs OBumble to be very negative and I feel it brought the tone of this thread into disrepute.

It might be a valid point but it still comes across as condescending.

timmyntc

SB_Part2 wrote: »

It might be a valid point but it still comes across as condescending.

In your eyes maybe. I don't see it personally. It's just frank and to the point advice.

El_Dangeroso

This is precisely why I didn't want to give specific examples of posters. It just degenerates to a slagging match.

I just want people to realise that you can make the same point and not be abrupt in tone.

Mrs OBumble

SB_Part2 wrote: »

Do you not think your last line alone is an example of you being condescending?

Eh? No. I'm giving advice about a function that some people don't know about, and might find helpful.

If you can suggest ways that I could have phrased it that would not have seemed condescending to you, then I'm all ears. But if you're saying I shouldn't have made the suggestion .. then nope, I can't agree with you there. Some people really don't know about it, and the only way they'll find out is if someone tells them.

FWIW, I don't consider anything here to be an "attack". It's just discussion of posting styles. Of course some people don't like the way I post. I don't like the way some other people post, too. That's just life. Not everyone's going to like each other - and no one's going to melt as a result.

If you want to influence posting to be more positive (or whatever), then you need to give specific, concrete examples of what you think it needs to be like - or not like. Saying "please be more positive" without being able to say how is meaningless.

El_Dangeroso

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

If you want to influence posting to be more positive (or whatever), then you need to give specific, concrete examples of what you think it needs to be like - or not like. Saying "please be more positive" without being able to say how is meaningless.

No, advising people to generally be less abrupt and to think about their tone is not meaningless.

The fact that you want to argue against people on this thread that are saying they refrain from participating in the community and demand they provide a dossier of evidence is sort of part of the problem.

If you can't see that then I guess you won't mind when there's less people posting here as a result.

sgthighway

I use to contribute to this section of boards a lot. It has turned into a moaning forum. Sorry.