The man and the hat and the cat

Mint Aero

There was once a man who had cat and also a hat. The hat he wore the cat he owned. This isn't a fairy tale nor rambling hearsay you might say. This is me telling you there once was a man with a cat and a hat and that is a matter of fact.

The hat you may ask, what's so special about the hat? Well of course the hat was magic wasn't it. Yes it was. Now I did say the man owned the hat and also the cat but I'm afraid I'm not being entirely honest with you, you the most avid of readers. The cat owned the hat. Yes the cat. Now the man, the man still owned the cat so by extension you could say he owned the hat too, yes you could say that.

Well now you might well think, if the cat had a hat and the hat was magic, perhaps the cat was too? No, no it wasn't. In fact it was dead. The cat was most certainly dead. The old man found him this morning, dead. The hat? The hat was where it was last left. So was the cat as it didn't move all night the old man thought, for it was dead so died did the cat where he sat last night with the hat by its side.

I didn't mention the car did I? No I didn't, I most certainly didn't but now I did so you know there's a car and I assume you presume the man with the dead cat who's hat sat beside the cat owns the car? Yes you're right. And, was the car magic too you suppose? No it wasn't. There's a magic hat owned by a dead cat and a man who hasn't said much yet other than think his cat was dead and that's enough, enough it is without a magic car in the pot. There's no pot either before you start, now, now that we're all well acquainted. What happened to the cat?.

Mint Aero

Opening to my book that I'm writing, what do you think?

Fuzzytrooper

Hmm interesting. It has a certain Dr Seuss-ish quality to it. It still feels a bit rough but there's something charming about the rambling nature of it.

It would be more suitable as flash fiction or a short story. I feel that this style would become tiring if it was a full novel.

Mr E

Fuzzytrooper wrote: »

I feel that this style would become tiring if it was a full novel.

I agree with this. What age group are you aiming it at?

Mint Aero

Aiming at young adults. There will be adult themes as the trio are up to no good. The narration style will be every 3rd chapter. You'll be left guessing throughout the book as to who the narrator is.

Fuzzytrooper

Mint Aero wrote: »

Aiming at young adults. There will be adult themes as the trio are up to no good. The narration style will be every 3rd chapter. You'll be left guessing throughout the book as to who the narrator is.

So other chapters will be in 3rd person?

Mint Aero

Fuzzytrooper wrote: »

So other chapters will be in 3rd person?

Yes they will. I'll include a sample of another chapter.

Mint Aero

"Dead is he?" She sqwuaked. "Dead?" She said.
Heh?
"I said is he dead?, that mangy cat of yours"
"Ours?" Confused and saddened by the still, limp body of his cat. Him, still limp, lumbered to his chair. Cursed cat he thought. "Where's my cane?"

"You don't have a cane you old fool"
Well I should, it's time I did. I'm old enough and... he looked over at his cat again lying in the corner. His trail of thought lost.
"What?"
His eyes darted to the kitchen. Her butt in the air again, her head in a press clambering about.

I'll find me a cane today. Or I'll make one. That's what I'll do. I'll head back to Hethersett. Shouting as loud as he could now. I say i'll head to Hethersett and find me a cane today!
"A cane?, what use have of you of a cane? " your father, now your father never used have a cane and his limp was so bad he'd knock his head off the side jamb coming in for supper." Her butt now tossing from side to side. "You remember?" her voice muffled from the depths of the press.

"Yes I remember. I'm not that bad yet. It's the short leg you see. Runs on his side." and with that he leapt to his feet. Looking to his toes and twirling around to catch a glimpse of his heels. It's my left. The left is shorter than the right I know it."
"they're the same on both sides you old fool." Peering from the press she now caught a glance of his butt in the air. Bent over, using his forearm as a rudimentary measuring device. Peering back upsidedown his pointy jaw level with his knees. He threw a sly grin. I'm right you know. I'm a whole pinkie short on my left.

"Hethersett you said? You won't! Cane you said? You'll take that cat out back and bury it". Handing him an old stained linen cloth from the press.
"Bury it?" He peered back to the cat. His ears slowly pricked up. The folds of skin on his cheekbones lifted and another grin formed. "Bury it I will" he murmured.

DavidKeane

I like the idea of varying the POV in different chapters. You'll have to have very clear voices IMO when doing this, otherwise it risks looking like you've just forgotten what tense you were using. It's hard to judge the story on what's been posted her but it sounds interesting and fun so far.