Kids in Cafes

Ave Sodalis

Keane2baMused wrote:

I would be more concerned about people not washing their hands which is far more likely to make someone sick and far more common than a flippin sock on a table.

But we are talking about an incident that did happen and why it's not okay.

John_Rambo

sup_dude wrote: »

What's with the sneery way of talking to people? That post was posted after I started to type mine and I didn't see it until I had mine posted.

Keep up. I posted way before you guessed and assumed! Nothing sneery about my posts, I just reposted how I'd react to my kid if he/she carried on.

sup_dude wrote: »

They have more bacteria than adults, and it's not about the dangers but the disgust.

A child year olds sock, thrown at a table.


It's not that bad. There's much worse things that can happen to you.

Grayditch

John_Rambo wrote: »

It's not that bad. There's much worse things that can happen to you.

This can apply to every single thing you ever care to complain about.

Ave Sodalis

John_Rambo wrote:

Keep up. I posted way before you guessed and assumed! Nothing sneery about my posts, I just reposted how I'd react to my kid if he/she carried on.

You do realise how much of a contradiction this part of the post is?
Also, you posted that after the post I was replying to. I'm on my phone so I'm not exactly replying at top speed.

John_Rambo wrote:

It's not that bad. There's much worse things that can happen to you.

Absolutely, there's far worse. But that's not the point.

Grandeeod

Oh the irony in this thread. People complaining about kids in cafes, acting like kids on an internet forum. I was enjoying myself tonight here on Boards. Having an oul ramble about the place called After Hours. But the experience has been ruined by supposed adults acting like children, while criticising children.

Keane2baMused

sup_dude wrote: »

But we are talking about an incident that did happen and why it's not okay.

Oh sorry I didn't realise bringing a valid point wasn't allowed.

I'll take a child's sock any day landing on my table over the bacteria your waiter who didn't wash his/her hands after the loo probably left all over your plates...

Wigglepuppy

metaoblivia wrote: »

LOL, dude I like kids. I'm the person who doesn't mind sitting next to babies on a plane and have held the hand of a little girl who was screaming and crying on a plane because she was scared of landing (she asked me to - just like she had asked me questions and asked me to play games with her during the flight, which I happily did, and her father held her other hand).

And even I think what you've said here is massively reaching. Having a sock thrown on your table while your eating isn't good manners under any circumstance and the parents should have apologized. It can't compare to "passive aggressive dirty looks." That's a non starter.

Same here. I like kids too - I'm not one of the folks who has a problem with them being in public places. Life doesn't always accommodate children being kept away entirely from family eateries, but the sock landing on someone else's table was bad manners as you say.

Now I seriously doubt children's feet sweat more than adults' feet! And of course much worse things could happen to someone than a child's sock landing on their table, but anyone would be a bit wtf if a sock landed on their table when they're having a meal (including those pretending it was no biggie!) - it warranted an apology in my opinion, but then no more needs to be said about it.

Smondie

goz83 wrote: »

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

It clearly isn't off the stones the brats are licking it.

Next time consider that you're probably sitting around parents who have gone to the trouble of hiring a babysitter, and are trying to enjoy a rare hour or two in adult, or non-screaming company.

I'm not aiming to please others by keeping my kids at home. And as has already been said, at a reasonable hour, one should expect kids unless you want to pay for that baby sitter and go to a fancy restaurant serving mini portions. So, please do excuse me if my priority is my family and not what others have spent on baby sitters.

I'm not inconsiderate of others, but I'm also not going to let my family life be ruled by some "adult" diners who insist on their quiet time in public. I said this in a similarly precious thread and I am saying it again.....If the establishment has a kids menu, expect kids and expect noise. Of course, I won't tolerate bad behaviour from any of my lot, but that's not to say that I expect them to be on mute to suit other people and their sometimes overly sensitive ears.

Are you suggesting that my kids are brats, or was that part of your post aimed elsewhere?

Smondie wrote: »

Good old adhd, where would we be without it?

I realise I might get an infraction here, but you really are being a d!ck. Why would you even joke about that? Do you have any idea how stressful and upsetting it is for many parents who have kids with adhd?

yellowcandle wrote: »

I had the misfortune to pass by the food hall upstairs in Liffey Valley today. It was full of youngsters high on sugar. It was a total nightmare.

My nightmares are usually a bit more scary than seeing a bunch of hyper kids around a food hall. :pac:

Smondie wrote: »

I saw a sign the other day whitch I had to laugh at.

Trespassers wil be prosecuted.etc

PARENTS
Please keep your children off this site.


I must get a picture of it the next time. Parents need special signs because they are special.

Did you not insinuate earlier that you had kids when someone suggested that you don't? Do you have kids? Do you know how many? Do they live with their mums?

Cienciano wrote: »

Wow, this thread was getting pretty stupid but this post has is a whole new level.

Yes, I think Smondie is going for the record and is building up quite a post count in the short time the account has been active.

zedhead wrote: »

You really think its ok for a child to throw a sock onto a complete strangers table while they are eating? And that the parents are right to laugh instead of apologise profusely?

I know this wasn't aimed at me, but even without proper context, the behaviour of the PARENTS in that case was terrible. I don't know what I would have done in the situation, but I wouldn't be happy with that carry on.

Smondie wrote: »

I would have taken off my sock and flung it over to thier table, and demanded they pay for new food for my table. See how funny it was then.

No, you wouldn't have. At least bring some sort of substance to the thread. Every single post I have seen you post is just tripe and often insulting. How old are you? Serious question.

You seem fascinated with me!?

Let's say a child does have adhd and it is being used to excuse behaviour, i'd ask this: why would a parent bring a child to a place that overwhelms them and causes a melt down? Are lattes more important than addressing the child's needs?

John_Rambo

sup_dude wrote: »

You do realise how much of a contradiction this part of the post is?
Also, you posted that after the post I was replying to. I'm on my phone so I'm not exactly replying at top speed.

Ah, but you assumed wrong, you assumed I was of the same attitude of the parents of the sock throwing parents, why did you did you assume this? Because your a silly billy! :pac:

Anyway, I've work to do in the morning to keep my kids in bacteria riddled sock and shoes.

Again, if any of you sensitive diners need direction to the hot spots of Dublin, Cork or Galway where you can eat the best of food, drink amazing wine or cocktails just PM me.

Otherwise, you're going to have to slum it with the horrible peasants and commoners and their childer in crappy cheap hotels, pretend you're above them and go online afterwards and plss and moan about how you're deep fried chips and carvery beef was RUINED by kids screaming or throwing various garments at you.

Good night. xxx

Keane2baMused

Smondie wrote: »

You seem fascinated with me!?

Let's say a child does have adhd and it is being used to excuse behaviour, i'd ask this: why would a parent bring a child to a place that overwhelms them and causes a melt down? Are lattes more important than addressing the child's needs?

There's a difference between using an excuse for a behaviour and there being a reason for a behaviour.

Why? Because it's the only way a child can learn to cope with a world that is so noisy to them it is almost painful. Otherwise they will never de-sensitise and become able to integrate into society, just as everyone else without a neurodevelopmental disorder can.

I can have a latte and address my child's needs. They are not mutually exclusive.

Ave Sodalis

Keane2baMused wrote:

Oh sorry I didn't realise bringing a valid point wasn't allowed.

Can you point to where I said this? Unwashed waiter hands are completely wrong... but we weren't talking about that.

Honestly, you'd swear I was saying all children are devil spawn but if you read my posts, I'm very much in the middle of what's a fairly hysterical thread on all sides. What I was saying with regard to the sock was that although crying/laughing etc are in a grey area of acceptable child behaviour, throwing a used sock at a stranger who is eating is definitely on the no side of acceptable child behaviour and that parents, who just laughed it off, should have remanded the child. No, it's not the worst thing that could happen and I think the majority of people would be satisfied to see the child get told off if it happened to them. But in this incident, the child wasn't and yet people were still trying to defend the action.

Whispered

The whole "is a sock landing on the table acceptable" conversation is hilarious. Of course it was rude! Not the end of the world, but rude. I'd be mortified if my fella did it.

Smondie wrote: »

are lattes more important than addressing the child's needs?

How do you teach a child (any child) the best way to act in public, without bringing them out in public? How do you suggest they learn social etiquette without being out in society?

Grayditch

sup_dude wrote: »

Honestly, you'd swear I was saying all children are devil spawn

You'll get a lot of that strawman craic on this thread.

SEPT 23 1989

Smondie wrote: »

You seem fascinated with me!?

Let's say a child does have adhd and it is being used to excuse behaviour, i'd ask this: why would a parent bring a child to a place that overwhelms them and causes a melt down? Are lattes more important than addressing the child's needs?

Would you prefer if they were kept in their room isolated like in the good old days?

Children with certain issues need to be socialised which is much more Important than your cup of coffee

Keane2baMused

sup_dude wrote: »

Can you point to where I said this? Unwashed waiter hands are completely wrong... but we weren't talking about that.

Honestly, you'd swear I was saying all children are devil spawn but if you read my posts, I'm very much in the middle of what's a fairly hysterical thread on all sides. What I was saying with regard to the sock was that although crying/laughing etc are in a grey area of acceptable child behaviour, throwing a used sock at a stranger who is eating is definitely on the no side of acceptable child behaviour and that parents, who just laughed it off, should have remanded the child. No, it's not the worst thing that could happen and I think the majority of people would be satisfied to see the child get told off if it happened to them. But in this incident, the child wasn't and yet people were still trying to defend the action.

If my child did that I would reprimand him for it and apologise to the person but I also wouldn't make a huge song and dance over it.

You also have to learn to pick your battles and not sweat the small stuff

Wigglepuppy

Keane2baMused wrote: »

If my child did that I would reprimand him for it and apologise to the person but I also wouldn't make a huge song and dance over it.

You also have to learn to pick your battles and not sweat the small stuff

I think that's all people are saying should have been done - but in this case it appears the parents did nothing, apart from laughing about it. I think that is what was taken issue with most.

Ave Sodalis

Keane2baMused wrote: »

If my child did that I would reprimand him for it and apologise to the person but I also wouldn't make a huge song and dance over it.

You also have to learn to pick your battles and not sweat the small stuff

I think you've been reading my posts wrong.

I didn't say make a song and dance about it. But someone who wouldn't be too impressed about it nor the parents reaction (again, these parents laughed and did nothing) isn't being hyper sensitive.

Smondie

Whispered wrote: »

The whole "is a sock landing on the table acceptable" conversation is hilarious. Of course it was rude! Not the end of the world, but rude. I'd be mortified if my fella did it.

Smondie wrote: »

are lattes more important than addressing the child's needs?

How do you teach a child (any child) the best way to act in public, without bringing them out in public? How do you suggest they learn social etiquette without being out in society?

Introduce them to the environment slowly at a pace they are comfortable with, practice scenarios, bring them to places they can play while thier food is being prepared, expel energy beforehand and come equipped with stuff for them to do etc. Read thier signals and work with them. If they are going to have a meltdown address the situation.

Not just lash them in, ignore thier meltdowns and tut at anyone who dares say anything while hoping the drugs kick in and sedates them in lieu of active parenting.

Yeah_Right

SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »

Children with certain issues need to be socialised which is much more Important than your cup of coffee

Not to me. My coffee is far more important.

Grayditch

Yeah_Right wrote: »

Not to me. My coffee is far more important.

Harsh.

Whispered

Smondie wrote: »

Introduce them to the environment slowly at a pace they are comfortable with, practice scenarios, bring them to places they can play while thier food is being prepared, expel energy beforehand and come equipped with stuff for them to do etc. Read thier signals and work with them. If they are going to have a meltdown address the situation.

Not just lash them in, ignore thier meltdowns and tut at anyone who dares say anything while hoping the drugs kick in and sedates them in lieu of active parenting.

That post started so well. Then you start on about lashing in drugs and sedatives. Where did that come from? Like who are you referring to?

Any child, any person really, needs to experience something to learn how to cope with it. Throwing a person into a situation which they're afraid of/uncomfortable with is not ideal. However, Sometimes kids misbehave, not because they are bold, having a meltdown or because their parents can't parent. Sometimes it's because they simply don't know how to act in a given situation. They're learning. It's up to the parent to guide that and teach them what is and isn't acceptable. The best way to do so is through day to day life.

Keane2baMused

Smondie wrote: »

Introduce them to the environment slowly at a pace they are comfortable with, practice scenarios, bring them to places they can play while thier food is being prepared, expel energy beforehand and come equipped with stuff for them to do etc. Read thier signals and work with them. If they are going to have a meltdown address the situation.

Not just lash them in, ignore thier meltdowns and tut at anyone who dares say anything while hoping the drugs kick in and sedates them in lieu of active parenting.

Jesus wept. You lost me at the second paragraph. For a moment there I thought you had an understanding.

You haven't a clue.

You should write a novel on this stuff if you have all of the right answers.

Keane2baMused

Yeah_Right wrote: »

Not to me. My coffee is far more important.

Let's all hope for your coffees sake nothing more important comes along so.

nullzero

The amount of Armchair parenting in this thread is hilarious. Every child is different, even a good child can act up in any given situation.
Some parents are negligent with their kids and don't consider others in public places, but these people are ar5eholes and they are ubiquitous part of the human experience for better or more accurately for worse.
People who can't handle children in cafés or restaurants need to be more tolerant as well. Before I had kids I wouldn't have had much empathy for parents struggling to deal with an unruly child in such a setting, but that was my own lack of experience informing my attitude then. Children are an essential part of the human race, we were obviously all children at one stage, the world isn't the sole property of twenty somethings no matter how much the media tells us it is, it can be hard to convince a well educated supposedly mature person that they are wrong about something when their moral indignation seems to be so logically justified, but kids I'm afraid are more important than us adults and it is our responsibility as a society to keep children at the apex of what is most cherished by us as a society, ruined lunches or grande lattes be damned.

goz83

Grandeeod wrote: »

Oh the irony in this thread. People complaining about kids in cafes, acting like kids on an internet forum. I was enjoying myself tonight here on Boards. Having an oul ramble about the place called After Hours. But the experience has been ruined by supposed adults acting like children, while criticising children.

It is After Hours. Much stupidity and crazy randomness to be expected, but yes, sometimes, some threads are abit too much and the attention some posters seem to crave is fascinating. The quote below for example.

Smondie wrote: »

You seem fascinated with me!?

Let's say a child does have adhd and it is being used to excuse behaviour, i'd ask this: why would a parent bring a child to a place that overwhelms them and causes a melt down? Are lattes more important than addressing the child's needs?

I can't really put a word on it, because I am trying to figure out whether you are intentionally posting rubbish, or whether you actually believe any of what you are posting. I really hope it is the former, because I would be concerned if anyone was so lacking in cop.

Keane2baMused answered your question.

Smondie wrote: »

Introduce them to the environment slowly at a pace they are comfortable with, practice scenarios, bring them to places they can play while thier food is being prepared, expel energy beforehand and come equipped with stuff for them to do etc. Read thier signals and work with them. If they are going to have a meltdown address the situation.

Not just lash them in, ignore thier meltdowns and tut at anyone who dares say anything while hoping the drugs kick in and sedates them in lieu of active parenting.

As a parent of a child with adhd, I can tell you that the behaviour isn't quite as predictable as you might think. One moment, behaviour is super. A second later....not so much. Thankfully my sons adhd is not severe and good parenting has gone a long way to keep it under control, but he certainly has his moments.

I think it's pretty obvious at this stage that you don't have kids. What you say above might look good and practical in theory, but has no resemblance of reality, or experience. You've answered my questions. Thanks.

Smondie

nullzero wrote: »

The amount of Armchair parenting in this thread is hilarious. Every child is different, even a good child can act up in any given situation.
..

I don't believe in the whole good child / bad child theory. No children are born bad.

@Keane2bemused : this might be included in chapter 4 of the book

nullzero

Smondie wrote: »

I don't believe in the whole good child / bad child theory. No children are born bad.

@Keane2bemused : this might be included in chapter 4 of the book

OK, you could say that a child that is typically well behaved can occasionally misbehave.

Grayditch

Grandeeod wrote: »

Oh the irony in this thread. People complaining about kids in cafes, acting like kids on an internet forum. I was enjoying myself tonight here on Boards. Having an oul ramble about the place called After Hours. But the experience has been ruined by supposed adults acting like children, while criticising children.

Posts sorta sounds more clever than it is though, right?

SOCKGATE!

Sue Pa Key Pa

I wish I never mentioned 'the sock'. So many friendships on here now beyond repair

For the record;
The sock was clean (looking)
The sock was thrown at our table, but missed
Daddy just said to little darling to just sit back down, no nod of apology in our direction
I didn't leave early because of this incident and my life is not in tatters as a result

On the scale of trauma I've had in my life, this ranks at the very bottom, but I still believe children should not be allowed do as they please simply because a) they are children or b) because of the time of day. It's just my opinion and I'm not advocating that the parents involved be shot (not for a first offence anyway)