Spoofers

4zn76tysfajdxp

I was in the pub with a group of friends last night one of whom was boasting about her skills with "martial arts" and ability to split others in half with a sword. This was a girl weighing no more than eight stone talking absolute tarmac. I told her that she was a spoofer and "martial arts" are a total waste of time and energy.

It got me thinking about other spoofers I've encountered. We all know the type. Lads claiming they could have "made it" in football if it weren't for an injury, people saying their friends from "northside" Dublin are really witty when they're just obnoxious blowhards, lads on the internet making out they're unreal self-made hardshaws when they wouldn't say boo to a ghost.

What about you? Have you met any spoofers in your time?

FrKurtFahrt

Grabs popcorn

keeponhurling

^ how do you know she's a spoofer ?

FrKurtFahrt

Grabs popcorn - let the games begin.

Birneybau

Knew a bloke years ago that worked in a clothes shop, saying 'Ah, Bono's in here all the time', be telling lads in the pub that himself and myself pulled some gorgeous women the previous week when we hadn't even been out and I'm sitting right beside him with a 'What the fcuk' look on my face.

Birneybau

FrKurtFahrt wrote: »

Grabs popcorn

FrKurtFahrt wrote: »

Grabs popcorn - let the games begin.

Loves the popcorn this one.

drunkmonkey

This reminds me of a little story I once heard about a pot and kettle...

4zn76tysfajdxp

keeponhurling wrote: »

^ how do you know she's a spoofer ?

Gut feeling, I would say.

keeponhurling

Something about popcorn

retalivity

The usual ****e....if you went to some random town in croatia and ended up on a bender for 3 days in Otočac with a jewish family that escaped from Auschwitz, this lad did it the year before for 4 days.

yellowcandle

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

I was in the pub with a group of friends last night one of whom was boasting about her skills with "martial arts" and ability to split others in half with a sword. This was a girl weighing no more than eight stone talking absolute tarmac. I told her that she was a spoofer and "martial arts" are a total waste of time and energy.

It got me thinking about other spoofers I've encountered. We all know the type. Lads claiming they could have "made it" in football if it weren't for an injury, people saying their friends from "northside" Dublin are really witty when they're just obnoxious blowhards, lads on the internet making out they're unreal self-made hardshaws when they wouldn't say boo to a ghost.

What about you? Have you met any spoofers in your time?

I worked with a girl one time, her brother had a baby with his wife. She told us that it was her baby, and since she was so young, her brother and wife adopted her child.

Cortina_MK_IV

Quite unreal that I was watching Reeling in the Years tonight and there was a bit about Eamonn Coghlan and it got me thinking along these lines. I knew a girl said she grew up beside him and he couldn't catch her in kiss chasing. (Didn't want to more like). Also knew some lads and one should have been with/instead of Paul McGrath going to United and was a better player but for injury, also Ronnie Whelan. Same he was a better player but for his knee or whatever.

yellowcandle

Cortina_MK_IV wrote: »

Quite unreal that I was watching Reeling in the Years tonight and there was a bit about Eamonn Coghlan and it got me thinking along these lines. I knew a girl said she grew up beside him and he couldn't catch her in kiss chasing. (Didn't want to more like). Also knew some lads and one should have been with/instead of Paul McGrath going to United and was a better player but for injury, also Ronnie Whelan. Same he was a better player but for his knee or whatever.

In fairness Coghlan wasn't a snappy sprinter, he could just stride for like 2 or 3 minutes really good.

El Weirdo

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

... group of friends ...

Yeah right.

Spoofer.

Duckworth_Luas

Reminds me of the time me, Johnny Cash and Sam Cooke were driving to the Fleadh Ceoil in Killarney. A fellow in a cowboy hat was thumbing a lift. Sam didn't want to pick him up but Johnny did. I said "go on Sam, it's pisin rain, the poor whore must be frezin". In the end Sam relented and the guy hopped in. Turns out it was Ronald Reagan.

Junkyard Tom

People who say 'I was in the pub the other night' on t'internet.

Spoofers.

kfallon

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

I was in the pub with a group of friends

There's some real spoof right there, 100% billy bullshíttin' going on......'friends' indeed :P

4zn76tysfajdxp

El Weirdo wrote: »

Yeah right.

Spoofer.

Junkyard Tom wrote: »

People who say 'I was in the pub the other night' on t'internet.

Spoofers.

kfallon wrote: »

There's some real spoof right there, 100% billy bullshíttin' going on......'friends' indeed :P

Woah, guys, where's all this coming from?

Elliott S

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

when they wouldn't say boo to a ghost.

Goose.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

Woah, guys, where's all this coming from?

It;s Friday night. You were drinking. You posted on boards. In after hours.

Pretty damning evidence, I believe.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

It;s Friday night. You were drinking. You posted on boards. In after hours.

Pretty damning evidence, I believe.

Me? Tonight? Drinking? Don't be ridiculous.

B.A._Baracus

It's sad to say but there is an awful lot of spoofers in this world.
Ranging from the type who you can't believe a single word they say, to people who like to big themselves up here or there.

Noveight

"I had trials with Lyon when I was u16."

At least name an average English club so it's semi-believable ffs :rolleyes:

uch

I could have made it at Tranmere Rovers when I was asked to go for a trial but I was busy being a junky at the time 25 years ago

pidgeoneyes

Noveight wrote: »

"I had trials with Lyon when I was u16."

At least name an average English club so it's semi-believable ffs :rolleyes:

Was probably ON trial in Lyon!

FortySeven

My ex always had friends who got better deals on everything. I spent whole days and weeks finding the best tv for the best price and sure enough . Her culchie friend got it cheaper from some shop in ballybackward.

I source a car in the UK. Time spent flying over and driving it back 2.5 k cheaper than anywhere in Ireland and sure enough. Her friend at work got it cheapr from the dealer with 3 years free service...

Thank duck she's my ex. Ducking idiot!

Jim Bob Scratcher

Most spoofers seem to like the drink, hence the shoite talk..

Tin Foil Hat

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

I was in the pub with a group of friends last night one of whom was boasting about her skills with "martial arts" and ability to split others in half with a sword. This was a girl weighing no more than eight stone talking absolute tarmac. I told her that she was a spoofer and "martial arts" are a total waste of time and energy.

It got me thinking about other spoofers I've encountered. We all know the type. Lads claiming they could have "made it" in football if it weren't for an injury, people saying their friends from "northside" Dublin are really witty when they're just obnoxious blowhards, lads on the internet making out they're unreal self-made hardshaws when they wouldn't say boo to a ghost.

What about you? Have you met any spoofers in your time?

Maybe she's well able to split others in half with a sword and only societal norms prevent her from doing so.
Maybe it was a personalised warning to you to stop staring down her top. Pervert.

uch

pidgeoneyes wrote: »

Was probably ON trial in Lyon!

Now if were talking about being on trial, i'd say I was on trial in most of europe, arrested in,,, Amsterdam, Breda, Rotterdam, Antwrep, Luxembourg, Zeebrugge, london, Douglas but to name a few

FortySeven

uch wrote: »

Now if were talking about being on trial, i'd say I was on trial in most of europe, arrested in,,, Amsterdam, Breda, Rotterdam, Antwrep, Luxembourg, Zeebrugge, london, Douglas but to name a few

Douglas? That's f@cking low mate.

uch

FortySeven wrote: »

Douglas? That's f@cking low mate.

Nearly got whipped

FortySeven

uch wrote: »

Nearly got whipped

There's a girl called candy in Douglas that could have bypassed the legalalities. She has a cat o nine. Bona fide.

topmanamillion

I know a lad and a few years ago on paddy's day we were walking down main street in Letterkenny. The parade had just passed ahead of us and we were very thankful we didn't run into it as we only had beer on our mind, we walk across the street to the other side.
At this point my friend pulls out his phone, rings his father and tells him : oh da you'll never guess what happened, me X & Y were walking down main street when the parade emerges behind us. We ended up marshaling it and waving to the crowd as we went along. It was really lucky that we were all wearing our county jersey." (Only one of us was wearing a county jersey).

uch

topmanamillion wrote: »

I know a lad and a few years ago on paddy's day we were walking down main street in Letterkenny. The parade had just passed ahead of us and we were very thankful we didn't run into it as we only had beer on our mind, we walk across the street to the other side.
At this point my friend pulls out his phone, rings his father and tells him : oh da you'll never guess what happened, me X & Y were walking down main street when the parade emerges behind us. We ended up marshaling it and waving to the crowd as we went along. It was really lucky that we were all wearing our county jersey." (Only one of us was wearing a county jersey).

Did you just come in from the pub ?

uch

FortySeven wrote: »

There's a girl called candy in Douglas that could have bypassed the legalalities. She has a cat o nine. Bona fide.

No listen dear, when I was in Douglas you could still be whipped for bad behavior

FortySeven

uch wrote: »

No listen dear, when I was in Douglas you could still be whipped for bad behavior

Candy would whip you for a 20.

uch

FortySeven wrote: »

Candy would whip you for a 20.

99:)

Robsweezie

Fifa 17? Completed it 17 times mate.

uch

Robsweezie wrote: »

Fifa 17? Completed it 17 times mate.

We have a Winner

Esel

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

I was in the pub with a group of friends last night one of whom was boasting about her skills with "marital arts" and ability to split others in half with a word.

FYP

Lie on, woo hoo!

Esel

yellowcandle wrote: »

I worked with a girl one time, her brother had a baby...

Obviously a spoofer. Brothers can't do dah.

Plus, you never worked with a girl. You never even worked.

Outlaw Pete

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRptAd9FGUI

alwaysadub

Worked with a lad years ago who came out with the most unreal bull. No matter what you did, he'd done it bigger, better or more extreme.
We were talking about someone getting a cut fairly close to their eye one day, and this lad comes out with a story of how he was just walking down the road one day and his eye just popped out of its socket and was hanging down his cheek. So he pushed it back in and continued on his journey with perfect vision and everything.

Badly Drunk Boy

Noveight wrote: »

"I had trials with Lyon when I was u16."

At least name an average English club so it's semi-believable ffs :rolleyes:

I worked with a lad who claimed to have played for IFK Gothenburg, mainly the reserves but also the senior team.

After years working on the factory floor, never getting a promotion despite constant sucking up to management, he was 'invited' to leave the company after missing time for his 3rd grandfather's funeral. (He had previous warnings.)

Burial.

Angelo Acidic Cab wrote: »

I was in the pub with a group of friends last night one of whom was boasting about her skills with "martial arts" and ability to split others in half with a sword. This was a girl weighing no more than eight stone talking absolute tarmac. I told her that she was a spoofer and "martial arts" are a total waste of time and energy.


What about you? Have you met any spoofers in your time?

Yeah. This one guy said that martial arts were a complete waste of time and energy. Spoofer.

Alf Stewart.

We all know that one absolute barry bull shītter.......

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GzWiXCHLek

evolving_doors

FortySeven wrote: »

My ex always had friends who got better deals on everything. I spent whole days and weeks finding the best tv for the best price and sure enough . Her culchie friend got it cheaper from some shop in ballybackward.

I source a car in the UK. Time spent flying over and driving it back 2.5 k cheaper than anywhere in Ireland and sure enough. Her friend at work got it cheapr from the dealer with 3 years free service...

Thank duck she's my ex. Ducking idiot!

Duck that dhit man.

evolving_doors

What is this mythical place called 'Douglas' people speak of?

alwaysadub

alwaysadub wrote: »

Worked with a lad years ago who came out with the most unreal bull. No matter what you did, he'd done it bigger, better or more extreme.
We were talking about someone getting a cut fairly close to their eye one day, and this lad comes out with a story of how he was just walking down the road one day and his eye just popped out of its socket and was hanging down his cheek. So he pushed it back in and continued on his journey with perfect vision and everything.

I know him.

Goes by the name Skullfúck

FortySeven

Gebgbegb wrote: »

What is this mythical place called 'Douglas' people speak of?

Tis a town on an island of three legged men.

Fluffy Cat 88

FortySeven wrote: »

Tis a town on an island of three legged men.

And tail-less cats