Engagement rings

RoboRat

Ask her to show you the type of engagement ring she wants, then get a replica made from cubic zirconia. She would never know as long she doesn't try to get it valued, or is friends with a jeweler.

I went to Antwerp for mine and paid a snip of what I would pay here, but still far too much IMO. This bull**** of 3 months wages is just the jewelers marketing ploy to get more money and is no different from possibly the greatest marketing campaign ever; the De Beers essentially though marketing, made the diamond the stone of choice and then bought up as much diamonds as possible to regulate the flow to the market so they can inflate the price.

Bottom line, diamonds are nowhere near as valuable or rare as they are made out to be. This is an interesting read and covers the De Beers marketing campaign:
http://blog.hubspot.com/marketing/diamond-de-beers-marketing-campaign#sm.001xx4ihs12rreewqs81ajxmbyqdl

Maximus Alexander

RoboRat wrote: »

Ask her to show you the type of engagement ring she wants, then get a replica made from cubic zirconia. She would never know as long she doesn't try to get it valued, or is friends with a jeweler.

Sure who wouldn't want to start their marriage on the back of a lie?

mackeire

Id say he spent a few hundred on the ring and just told everyone it was 8 g's.
Liar!!!!!

RoboRat

valoren wrote: »

How about a new tradition?

If a man feels compelled to buy a bit of carbon for what is essentially a symbolic gesture, how about he get's a wrist watch bought for him in return.
My guess is that you wouldn't see many married lads walking around sporting a Rolex if that was the case.

I did that, after I bought the overpriced ring, I picked out a lovely watch and asked my fiancee to buy it for me as her engagement gift to me. I could have bought it myself but I felt I also deserved something special seeing as I shelled out a lot of cash on something I personally think is silly.

I got the watch anyhow :-)

minikin

My ex insisted on something with a big stone... was glad she didn't ask for something with a few carrots.

nullzero

I personally haggled when buying hers, got a reasonable reduction as well, not saying how much I paid but some people see it as a badge of honor to Bragg about how much they spent.

PARlance

valoren wrote: »

Just took a look.

Go back 10 years. Someone wants to spend $8000 on a Tiffany diamond ring which is now worth a fraction of what was paid.

Instead the fiancee says, i don't want a ring but invest it in Tiffany shares instead.

The 8 grand would be worth 16 grand now. Or 19 grand if the dividends were reinvested.

You would now have 311 shares and they would be paying you almost $140 every 3 months. (current dividend is 45 cent)

That's diamond investing.

Not sure how much that 8k ring would be worth today but it wouldn't be paying you money every 3 months that's for sure.

Sex could be limited to 4 times a year to celebrate to quarterly dividend. You could spice it up by going non-missionary for the Annual Results.

Smondie

minikin wrote: »

My ex insisted on something with a big stone... was glad she didn't ask for something with a few carrots.

it would have been nutricious aswell as romantic

maudgonner

RoboRat wrote: »

Ask her to show you the type of engagement ring she wants, then get a replica made from cubic zirconia. She would never know as long she doesn't try to get it valued, or is friends with a jeweler.

Or how about you marry someone with the same financial values as you and be honest about things? Wouldn't that be more likely to save a lot of hassle in the long run?

Or if she does want an expensive ring, but you decide that she's got qualities that outweigh any differences you have about finances, then shouldn't you be adult enough to live with the consequences of that and buy her a diamond ring, rather than lie to her about it?


(And I say this as someone who wouldn't want to have more than a couple of hundred quid spent on an engagement ring for me, were I ever to get married. But if I found out I had been lied to about it I would be extremely upset and worried about what other lies would be told)

OSI

Just on the subject of engagement rings generally, the engagement ring isn't some venerable old tradition that dates back to ancient times, as some might assume (well, betrothal rings did exist, but mainly among the nobility)

In the Victorian era, men did give posie rings to women, but they were cheap and symbolic of a lover's affection, not exclusively used in a marital context.

Modern, diamond engagement rings are the result of a 20th century marketing strategy by -- you guessed it -- deBeers, the diamond cartel, after the price of diamonds collapsed in the 1930s.

They also started that silly rule about selecting a ring that costs the equivalent of a month's salary. Sneaky, eh?

I know that all sounds like a conspiracy theory, you bunch of old skeptics, but it's verifiably true.

http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-27371208

The idea was embedded in popular culture in the West by an advertising drive from the De Beers diamond cartel that started in the lean years of the 1930s. The Depression was a disaster for De Beers, which controlled 60% of rough diamond output. De Beers embarked on what it now describes as a "substantial" campaign, linking diamonds with engagement.

Prior to the 1930s, presenting a woman with a diamond engagement ring was not the norm. Even on the eve of World War Two, a mere 10% of engagement rings contained diamonds. By the end of the 20th Century, 80% did.

OSI wrote: »

"One used engagement ring for sale"

Yeah, you're alright thanks.

I wouldn't have a problem buying someone a used engagement ring, is that a bad luck thing?

When my eldest sister got engaged, her (now) husband bought her a nice diamond & emerald ring, it was an antique (read: used) ring. He couldn't afford a new ring as they were students. There were some bitchy comments; I gather some women were mildly alarmed that it was a 'second-hand' ring, but who really cares?

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Mine was less than a grand. Off the top of my head I think it was about 875? I didn't even want an engagement ring. I wanted engagement shoes (which I got) but he felt weird about me not having a ring, so we just got a basic token ring that wasn't expensive at all.

A few months later I saw this beautiful ring with a morganite stone, it didn't look like an engagement ring at all. But it was beautiful. I fell in love with it and I was going to buy it for myself. He of course was delighted I found a ring that I really loved, and he bought it for me.

So it's a sort of present, sort of engagement ring.

http://tinypic.com/r/11kbhp1/9

Whatever you can afford.

8k to one person might be 1k to another.

Ted111

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

I know that all sounds like a conspiracy theory, you bunch of old skeptics, but it's verifiably true.

It sounds like you only just found this out :eek:

Toots

woodchuck wrote: »

Technically, yes. But if they broke up because he cheated or something, it'd be a bit cheeky for him to ask for it back!!

Apparently it depends on who does the breaking up. If it's the girl, she's supposed to give the ring back. If it's the fella, she keeps it. If it's a mutual parting, they rock-paper-scissors for it.

BigMawn12

Was supposed to get a rock only for £1k today to take on holiday. It is still in transit so ended up getting a faker with a view to getting real rock and ring sorted when we get home. Got a wee £145 ring as well so she has something to wear in the meantime.

Anyway, starting to wonder if I should just hold off until ring is sorted. Heard the woman and her mate scoff at a proposal without a ring before.

What do yas reckon? The whole diamond thing is the biggest scam in the history of man. They're not even traditional - it has only been around since a successful advertising campaign in the early 1900s by the De Beers.

I'd love to get something much more unique and special tbh. Diamonds aren't even rare but I know I'm the only one that cares about this sort of stuff.

Anyway budget is £1k for the rock and £700 for 18c gold and workmanship. Thoughts?

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly

What do gays and lesbians do?

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly wrote: »

What do gays and lesbians do?

All the gay guys in my circle of friends are very ring-oriented, but I believe 'ring finger' has a rather different meaning for these chaps.

BigMawn12

Just realised this thread has more than 1 page (using the app) so sorry for repeating things like the big De Beers scam etc.

Smondie

BigMawn12 wrote: »

Was supposed to get a rock only for £1k today to take on holiday. It is still in transit so ended up getting a faker with a view to getting real rock and ring sorted when we get home. Got a wee £145 ring as well so she has something to wear in the meantime.

Anyway, starting to wonder if I should just hold off until ring is sorted. Heard the woman and her mate scoff at a proposal without a ring before.

What do yas reckon? The whole diamond thing is the biggest scam in the history of man. They're not even traditional - it has only been around since a successful advertising campaign in the early 1900s by the De Beers.

I'd love to get something much more unique and special tbh. Diamonds aren't even rare but I know I'm the only one that cares about this sort of stuff.

Anyway budget is £1k for the rock and £700 for 18c gold and workmanship. Thoughts?

Go for what you can afford. I don't get the idea of getting a stand in ring.if you ask her with a ring, that's her engagement ring. It's the one she'll show everyone when she tells them she got engaged.


Unless she'll show them the ring with a big story about that's all you coukd afford and then 6 months later she's going to go around showing everyone her "real" engagement ring. A nice ring for a 100 is better that a horrible ring worth more imho. It's the meaning and intent behind it that's important.


In Germany it's one ring, worn on the right hand when engaged and switched to the left hand when married.

I've heard of women purchasing thier own engagement rings they engagements didn't last long for some reason!

awec

BigMawn12 wrote: »

Was supposed to get a rock only for £1k today to take on holiday. It is still in transit so ended up getting a faker with a view to getting real rock and ring sorted when we get home. Got a wee £145 ring as well so she has something to wear in the meantime.

Anyway, starting to wonder if I should just hold off until ring is sorted. Heard the woman and her mate scoff at a proposal without a ring before.

What do yas reckon? The whole diamond thing is the biggest scam in the history of man. They're not even traditional - it has only been around since a successful advertising campaign in the early 1900s by the De Beers.

I'd love to get something much more unique and special tbh. Diamonds aren't even rare but I know I'm the only one that cares about this sort of stuff.

Anyway budget is £1k for the rock and £700 for 18c gold and workmanship. Thoughts?

Proposing with a temporary ring is pretty common nowadays.

Also means she gets to have the fun of picking her own ring.

I wouldn't get a custom one made beforehand unless you are completely certain of what she wants and will like. My missus always said she wanted one type of ring but when it came to actually buying it she opted for the total opposite after trying them on.

Malari

We didn't get engaged, we went straight to marriage So I don't have one. We got nice wedding rings. Mine cost about 4 times what his did, but I wear it all the time and he only wears his occasionally.

Smondie

awec wrote: »

Proposing with a temporary ring is pretty common nowadays.

..

Well if it is, a ring from the pound shop should do as a tempory ring.

awec

awec wrote: »

My missus always said she wanted one type of ring but when it came to actually buying it she opted for the total opposite after trying them on.

Ahhh I didn't realise that's so lovely

ScumLord

BigMawn12 wrote: »

I'd love to get something much more unique and special tbh. Diamonds aren't even rare but I know I'm the only one that cares about this sort of stuff.

The problem is once you start looking at actually rare gemstones they are expensive.

I don't know what the cost of having a jeweler make a unique piece is, but if you're not using expensive stones it would allow you both to create something that is actually unique and meaningful to you. You're also supporting local arts and crafts, rather than exploiting the people of poorer nations. If you found the right person it could be something you sit down together and design.

It might be something that borderline worthless to anybody else but nobody should be thinking about the resale value going into a marriage.

ScumLord

awec wrote: »

Also means she gets to have the fun of picking her own ring.

Sounds disgusting. If she likes picking her own ring, maybe move on.

maudgonner

ScumLord wrote: »

Sounds disgusting. If she likes picking her own ring, maybe move on.

It's when they go around looking at other people's rings, deciding which of those they'd like to pick, trying them on for size even, that's when alarm bells really should be sounding.

woodchuck

ScumLord wrote: »

Sounds disgusting. If she likes picking her own ring, maybe move on.

It's actually fairly common nowadays and it makes sense when you think about it. It's something she'll be wearing every day for the rest of her life, so it makes sense that she likes the look and feel of it!

And even if the guy knows the girl very well and picks a ring he thinks she'll like, as another poster mentioned, you can have your heart set on one thing but then realise it doesn't suit your hand at all when trying it on. This is why the cheaper proposal ring followed by picking the actual engagement ring together has become so popular.

maudgonner

Apparently the new thing is for the girl to pick the guy's ring. I don't know how I feel about that tbh.

groucho marx

I'd buy a brack...this is how recessions start.

Smondie

maudgonner wrote: »

Apparently the new thing is for the girl to pick the guy's ring. I don't know how I feel about that tbh.

Does he get a stand in ring until he decides what one suits his finger too?

groucho marx

I was wondering is ops friend on the dole... now that would make this ah gold

maudgonner

Smondie wrote: »

Does he get a stand in ring until he decides what one suits his finger too?

Would a guy be happy to have his fiancee pick a stand-in's ring? That's even more strange really.

Smondie

maudgonner wrote: »

Would a guy be happy to have his fiancee pick a stand-in's ring? That's even more strange really.

Along as he doesn't pick the stand-in's ring over her, I can't see what the problem would be?

Lux23

Looking for an engagement ring now and the ones I like seem to be about €2k, I wouldn't be looking to spend much more. The wedding will also be a fairly low key affair!

Malari

ScumLord wrote: »

Sounds disgusting. If she likes picking her own ring, maybe move on.

Are people actually misunderstanding this post? :-D

TitianGerm

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Mine was less than a grand. Off the top of my head I think it was about 875? I didn't even want an engagement ring. I wanted engagement shoes (which I got) but he felt weird about me not having a ring, so we just got a basic token ring that wasn't expensive at all.

A few months later I saw this beautiful ring with a morganite stone, it didn't look like an engagement ring at all. But it was beautiful. I fell in love with it and I was going to buy it for myself. He of course was delighted I found a ring that I really loved, and he bought it for me.

So it's a sort of present, sort of engagement ring.

http://tinypic.com/r/11kbhp1/9

A basic ring for €875.
A pair of engagement shoes, hardly from Penney's?
A second ring.

I think someone is spoilt

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

emmetkenny wrote: »

A basic ring for €875.
A pair of engagement shoes, hardly from Penney's?
A second ring.

I think someone is spoilt

No the basic ring was really basic. About 150 euro. The second ring I was going to buy myself.

eviltwin

beach_walker wrote: »

A friend of mine got engaged recently, apparently he spent eight grand on the ring! I didn't ask, he told us in the Whatsapp group. It's his money but personally I think that amount is ridiculous.

How much was spent on yours? They used to flog the whole "three months salary" guff (which was a great campaign) but curious to know what the going rate is now-a-days.

Zilch. I don't have one. It seemed crazy to spend that much on something just for me when we could use that money on something the family would enjoy.

FizzleSticks

This post has been deleted.

ScumLord

woodchuck wrote: »

It's actually fairly common nowadays and it makes sense when you think about it.

I don't want to hear about people picking their rings, I don't care how common it is.

smash

FizzleSticks wrote: »

I'm allergic to Gold so it shall be a silver ring for me.

I'm sure some people will be horrified.

Get a tattooed ring. Classy as fcuk!

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Did anyone see the photo of that man who got a cat tattooed on his belly and had his belly button act as the cats ring

Smondie

FizzleSticks wrote: »

I'm allergic to Gold so it shall be a silver ring for me.

I'm sure some people will be horrified.

Platinum surely :eek:

Malari

FizzleSticks wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

No, that's not unusual anymore. I can only think of two friends with gold.

smash

smash wrote: »

Get a tattooed ring. Classy as fcuk!

Oh ick. I was sitting across from a man on the train who had a kind of faded claddagh style ring tattooed on his wedding finger. He was a big lad with a shaved head in full tracksuit mode. My little mind went in to judgement overdrive.

josip

FizzleSticks wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Is it the gold or the nickel you're allergic to?

http://www.dermnetnz.org/topics/jewelry-allergy

Summer wind

I got engaged 19 years ago and my ring was €1,200. We looked at a good few some which were cheaper and others were more expensive. Kept going back to the first ring I'd tried and to this day I love it. Don't think I could ever justify spending €8,000 on a ring.

scamalert

well for some reason it shows how stupid people are,now aside those that make millions i can understand since its pennies for them,but for working class person to fork out 4-10grand seems common,and all this crap just because one company invented strategy and add to monopolize whole market,when same diamonds are used on any drill or cutting disc since they didnt make the grade and size.

Thus theres mentality of them being rear and precious when its common mineral.And to make matters worse 99.9% getting them diamonds wouldn't know if it was some polished mineral or some common bling :]

Smondie

scamalert wrote: »

well for some reason it shows how stupid people are,now aside those that make millions i can understand since its pennies for them,but for working class person to fork out 4-10grand seems common,and all this crap just because one company invented strategy and add to monopolize whole market,when same diamonds are used on any drill or cutting disc since they didnt make the grade and size.

Thus theres mentality of them being rear and precious when its common mineral.And to make matters worse 99.9% getting them diamonds wouldn't know if it was some polished mineral or some common bling :]

Not just one engagement ring required now but two.


"And to make matters worse 99.9% getting them diamonds wouldn't know if it was some polished mineral or some common bling "


Diamond experts to thread in 3,2,,,,

RoboRat

maudgonner wrote: »

Or how about you marry someone with the same financial values as you and be honest about things? Wouldn't that be more likely to save a lot of hassle in the long run?

Or if she does want an expensive ring, but you decide that she's got qualities that outweigh any differences you have about finances, then shouldn't you be adult enough to live with the consequences of that and buy her a diamond ring, rather than lie to her about it?


(And I say this as someone who wouldn't want to have more than a couple of hundred quid spent on an engagement ring for me, were I ever to get married. But if I found out I had been lied to about it I would be extremely upset and worried about what other lies would be told)

I never said to lie, but being honest most people could be wearing zirconia and wouldn't have a clue. My wife has hers and it's never been valued so I could have just paid a fraction and it would never have been noticed.
Alternatively, get a synthetic diamond, fraction of the cost and it's still a diamond albeit a man made one.... I ct with rose gold ring is around 500 Euro.