Liveline thread 12/08/16 to date

Ally Dick

There were more bikes in Dublin yesterday than Amsterdam. it was amazing around by the Grand Canal. Thought it was great. Two fingers to the bus drivers

Dan Jaman

vicwatson wrote: »

What happened there?

Philip got uncomfortable with some figures.

Red Kev

90% broken, 95% stolen.

In fairness I know about him, he does a decent job for the kids.

TheHomeService

Can you imagine Duffy on a bike?

Dan Jaman

Every time I hear the news is to be read by Shane MacGowan, I expect a torrent of abuse and profanity.

pc7

Ally Dick wrote: »

There were more bikes in Dublin yesterday than Amsterdam. it was amazing around by the Grand Canal. Thought it was great. Two fingers to the bus drivers

Some of them are brutal though, Id more hassle getting out of town yesterday due to people on bikes. I'd say 50% have never had a bike on the road or even driven, they were clueless and dangerous.

Fujitsu10

pc7 wrote: »

Some of them are brutal though, Id more hassle getting out of town yesterday die to people on bikes. I'd say 50% have never had a bike on the road or even drive, they were clueless and dangerous.

Sounds normal for cyclists, rules don't apply to them.

sligojoek

Park Royal wrote: »

Hard to believe the GAA would allow drunks into the game.....

I know a man who played a county hurling final out of his head on coke and yokes. He scored the two winning points.

sligojoek

Dan Jaman wrote: »

Every time I hear the news is to be read by Shane MacGowan, I expect a torrent of abuse and profanity.

We won't be hearing from the 'real' Shane for a while. He's getting major hip surgery done soon.

Red Kev

sligojoek wrote: »

We won't be hearing from the 'real' Shane for a while. He's getting major hip surgery done soon.

Is he going to be a Hipster caller?

ButtersSuki

TheHomeService wrote: »

Can you imagine Duffy on a bike?

It would look something like this so to speak:

Oops69

TheHomeService wrote: »

Can you imagine Duffy on a bike?

lying collapsed across one yes , but cycling one? , no.

sligojoek

Red Kev wrote: »

Is he going to be a Hipster caller?

He was a hipster before it was cool.

Joe: Can you describe the paaaayyyyne, Shaaaaaayne?

Shane: F*cking excrutiating, John.

ButtersSuki

Oops69 wrote: »

lying collapsed across one yes , but cycling one? , no.

I'd say if you coated one in chocolate he'd have a good go at eating a bike so to speak.

Actually maybe dipping it in champagne would be more to his taste so to speak.

furiousox

bm_1212 wrote: »

i think philip is best described as 'ponderous'

He drips and exudes boredom from every pore.

Atlantic Dawn

I see all prisoners are going to receive a medical card when they leave prison, should make the show golden next week so to speak...

All prisoners will be given a medical card on the day they leave prison as part of a new agreement between the HSE and the Irish Prison Service (IPS).

In a move that is likely to anger families and groups that have campaigned for cards, Michael Donnellan, the IPS director general, confirmed that medical cards will be automatically issued to all prisoners once they are released.

The process has already begun at Cork Prison, where Mr Donnellan said they were “going to test the system for the next few weeks, but it is going nationwide”.

http://www.irishexaminer.com/ireland/prisoners-to-get-medical-card-when-they-leave-jail-421351.html

Brendan Bendar

furiousox wrote: »

He drips and exudes boredom from every pore.

Heh heh I'll try to beat that.

'He has the energy of a Zambesi croc at midday on the bank at Chobe National Park"

Did me best:D

Dan Jaman

I dunno; there are some days I prefer the calm, measured tones of PBH to the ill-informed populist nonsense that normally comes from the user of that studio microphone. One can only take so much of Mano de Peepul.

sligojoek

Dan Jaman wrote: »

I dunno; there are some days I prefer the calm, measured tones of PBH to the ill-informed populist nonsense that normally comes from the user of that studio microphone. One can only take so much of Mano de Peepul.

I agree with the last sentence but not the first.

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

I agree with the last sentence but not the first.

WHOY?

ButtersSuki

Dan Jaman wrote: »

I dunno; there are some days I prefer the calm, measured tones of PBH to the ill-informed populist nonsense that normally comes from the user of that studio microphone. One can only take so much of Mano de Peepul.

I think the real question is which of the TWO full-time hosts do you prefer?

Atlantic Dawn

Whoy don't they make a 2nd jingle "talk to Philip..." seeing as he's the other full time presenter to use when Joe is off?

ButtersSuki

Atlantic Dawn wrote: »

Whoy don't they make a 2nd jingle "talk to Philip..." seeing as he's the other full time presenter to use when Joe is off?

He's the full-time presenter, not just when Joe is off....according to himself and RTÉ so to speak.

ButtersSuki

Me Weekly Column, by me, Joe Duffy so to speak.

So dis week after puttin' in a 2 week hard slog so to speak I treated meself to a week off. It wasn't all jolliers so to speak as I did some wurk too, yisser no me and me moynd is always wurkin' overtime so to speak plottin' and schemin' so to speak but more on dat later so to speak.

Me jolliers:
After last Friday's show it was straight into de Jag and off to de airport to fly out to de French Chateau. Mrs. Duffy packed de Lyons Tea, de Superquinn sausages, de Brennan's bread, de frozen coddle and de TK Red Lemonade as I don't like spending me money in France as it's terribull expensive dare so to speak. It wasn't all fun in de sun so to speak as I did some research for me new buke - well by research I mean I opened de emails dat peeple sent ta me after I axed dem to on de twitter masheen and on me show. It's great been able to cut adn paste udder peeple's wurk into a buke and profitten from dat, and also havin' yer own show to promote yer own bukes dat you do be writin' wit de precious little free toyme ya do be havin' after puttin' in a hard week's wurk so to speak. After been in de studio all summer puttin' in a number of 6 hour and 15 minute weeks (including breaks) I needed a breakeen.

I also had RTE fly out de Funny Fryday Crew to de chateau and we did a rehearsal of next week's Funny Fryday on a Turrsday from Tulla-More-Ray. Syl brawt his "ye Olde Joke Buke, 1853" wit him and as usual we stole all de jokes from dat. It's been a long time since we ad Brindin O'Cardle on as part of de Funny Fryday Crew as he's all famous now and dat so dare'll be no more "willy" jokes so to speak. RTE also paid for Derry Clarke from De Samsung Kitchen @ Leck-rivv-van to come out and cuke us coddle everyday. It was bewerifull so to speak.

As I was missin' de death and dat I came back to Dubalin on Turrsday and went to a few funerals to catch up. Dare wasn't enough cryin' at deeze dough for my likin'. I'm going ta have a lot of death and misery on de show dis week I tink. I deserve it.

I also had to come back as I was invited don't you know by de hob nobs in de university in Galway to teech dem about de death of chilsers so I had to prepare me speech so to speak. I did made it very good and used all me bestest wurds in me speech so to speak. I truly was hob nobbin' wit de hob nobs - it wasn't some petty little talk for stewdents now, it was for authors and intellect-chewels like meself so to speak. I only axed for a few tings to give me talk:
1. me fee (of course)
2. a generous mileage package
3. me ryder to be filled wit de best coddle and TK Red Lemonade
4. a stand for me to sell me buke before and after me talk. As yisser all know it was important to me to keep de pryce under €20, so it was available for €25 on de day so I could make a few extra bob as I was signin' dem and dat. De stand was classy dough with a flashing electric sign and two disco balls - very Hollywood so to speak
5. to hurry up wit me honorary doctorate. I mean, I'm now and author and a broadcaster and I help more peeple in a week dan the HSE do in a year - actually, day should be givin' me 2 doctorates so to speak. "Talk to Dr. Joe" has a nice ring to it so to speak, don't ya tink. I need ta talk to Noel to tell Trinity to hurry up on dat wan too.
As I was in Galway I had to use some Irish so tp speak but it's a good job I do be flewent in dat too so to speak. I dazzled de audience wit me nolledge of de death and dat, threw in some great puns about dyin' chislers, and signed off with a koopla fockle. Day were in stunned silence at de end it was so brillunt.

On de way down I listened to me favourite cds; Sonny Knowles, Dickie Rock and De Swedish House Mafia. De Jag has a great sound system (day axed me to say dat, it'a part of de deal), although I have to say I prefer de Swedish House Mafia's earlier wurk as dare latter stuff was just a little too commercial for me likin' so to speak.

Wan ting dough about de road to Galway is dare's a lot of tolls on de way down. It would be great if I had an Eazy Pass so if anywan from dare PR company are listenin' I'll plug it a few times if youz can send wan in ta me so to speak? It'll definitely be noticed as dare's no ads on Lahv Lahn anymore........

I don't know wat happened on me show dis week - I barely listen to de callers wen I'm dare and gettin' paid for it, yisser hardly tink I was listenin' wen I wasn't dare now do yiz? I'm sure wit Philip dare dough it was fairly borin' dough. He's gas Philip, anudder fella who got in to RTE because of who he's related to and now he tinks he's the full-time host a me show? He is in his bollix, so to speak. I'll put manners on him wen I get in tamorra bright and early around 12:30pm.

So after me week off it's back ta de hard grind tamorra for me de wurkin' man and de voyce a de peeple. Hopefully de traffic won't be too bad and I can be home be half 3 for me tea so to speak.

'Til next week, keep de faith.

Hitchens

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/news/fare-city-rte-spent-almost-14kaday-on-taxis-last-year-35059614.html

It just gets better all the time. Do something Joe!

somesoldiers

I missed all last week, was Duffser off all week? whats the count up to now? 8 weeks?

ButtersSuki

Hitchens wrote: »

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/news/fare-city-rte-spent-almost-14kaday-on-taxis-last-year-35059614.html

It just gets better all the time. Do something Joe!

They spent more on taxis dan day did on Joe. He'll be fumin'.

ButtersSuki

somesoldiers wrote: »

I missed all last week, was Duffser off all week?

Yes, anudder unanounced week off so to speak.

somesoldiers wrote: »

whats the count up to now? 8 weeks?

Though I started a Joe Show/No Show Joe count at the start of the year sadly I didn't keep it up (oooh matron) so to speak. But in his own moynd he was here all summer so to speak.

sligojoek

Direct provision.
Bus strike.
Open the bus lanes.
De match. Nail biting spectacle.Tickeh scalpers.
Bronze Paralimpic medal from 1984

sligojoek

He's back , so to speak.