Leaving work due to anxiety

Nototrump

So I am facing a period of significant anxiety and depression at present it has been ongoing for about 10 years but has gradual been intensifying for the last couple of years.
I have been in my current job for the last two years and have had 4/5 weeks off sick due to mental health issues in this time.

My doctor feels I am probably not able for the job at present and to be fair he is right. I just had an appointment with him this afternoon and we agreed I would hand in my months’ notice next week. I have 4 weeks holiday pay to take so I was going to take that while looking for something else.

The thing is it’s a very good job with good pay and I may regret it if I don’t find something else suitable.

I have made an appoint with HR to discuss it next week and I was thinking maybe I could ask for a leave of absent for 3 months without pay to see if I could get on top of my problems once and for all. Then I could return to the same role.

How would people think a potential employer would look at this suggestion?

The four weeks I have been off I received full pay but I feel awful being off to be honest really if I could just keep working through it I would.

My employer has invested a lot in my training over the last few years and HR have been very nice to me when I disclosed the mental health issue but I still feel terrible to be the weak link and it probably would be best if we did part ways but part of me thinks I am letting a big opportunity pass me by quitting.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Laura_A

There is nothing weak about needing to take some time for yourself.

I would talk to your HR and see if they would be open to a leave of absence, at the end of the day your going to hand in your notice regardless so the worst they can say is no but they might be completely open to it.

Really depends on the company some are just better than others at dealing with mental health problems with compassion rather than just a business decision.

Best of luck with it whatever you do.

drunkmonkey

Nototrump wrote: »

How would people think a potential employer would look at this suggestion?

Not to be blunt about it but a potential employer would run a mile, sounds like your in a good job with an understanding employer, you said you feel like the weak link in the team is that something you can work on with coaching/training while keeping your job?
I'd stay put if I was you and try and get all the help you need. Asking for 3mts off without knowing that's a cure might not be much use and test an employers patience if you came back the same way.
With the proper supports your anxiety can be overcome but if it's being triggered by you not doing well in work you need to concentrate on doing better in work and ask for what ever help you need.

I stay but get the best help you can. Try and remain in your job if you can. A new job might not be as tolerant and not disclosing any problems before commencing employment could land you in trouble.

Stealthfins

I'd go to a doctor,they might suggest a low dose of antidepressants.
They usually take the edge away,and a bit of counselling wouldn't go astray.

I get bouts of depression myself every 4 or 5 years I go on an antidepressant for around 6 month's.

I'm lucky they suit my metabolism,and I am myself without the hole in the soul.

I empathize with you,I know the feeling.

I suggest you go to your GP

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

Not to be blunt about it but a potential employer would run a mile, sounds like your in a good job with an understanding employer, you said you feel like the weak link in the team is that something you can work on with coaching/training while keeping your job?

I stay but get the best help you can. Try and remain in your job if you can. A new job might not be as tolerant and not disclosing any problems before commencing employment could land you in trouble.

please do not offer your own opinion as fact. its not helpful to the OP.

A lot of employers from my experience are more understanding than expected when it comes to mental health issues. While it depends on your company and i can only speak regarding my own org, we offer a support system for any employee going though health or personal issues.

Definitely approach them,
speak to your GP about taking time off first though, they might think reduced hours or flextime might be more suitable.

seamus

drunkmonkey is right. You sound like you're very forthcoming about your illness, which won't always be to your benefit.

Anyone who says they're leaving a job because they're having difficulty handling it and mention anything about stress, anxiety or sick leave, will find themselves excluded from the candidate pool very quickly. You could be brilliant at what you do, but if you're disappearing for weeks at a time it's going to look bad in a new job.

You're in a much stronger position, being in your current job for two years. Handing in your notice might seem like an easy way to relieve some of the pressure you feel, but trying to find and then start a new job will be a hell of a lot more stressful.

Get a referral to a counsellor. Don't assume your GP really understands how to help you. There's no reason not to trust him, but he's not a doctor of psychology. Of course ignore that if the "doctor" you're referring to is your counsellor.

I would definitely go with the leave of absence suggestion. You think you want to leave anyway, so you have nothing to lose. Maybe even consider if it's possible to go on a shorter working week. Do 3 days instead of five, take the other two days to do things that relieve your anxiety.

Tell me how

I think if you are out of work and struggle to find a new one it would likely add to your anxiety.

I would definitely be upfront with your company and see if they can work with you to allow you to focus on getting well.

drunkmonkey

livedadream wrote: »

please do not offer your own opinion as fact. its not helpful to the OP.

I'm an employer, while I'll do my best for my employees and have done in the past I will not knowingly take on someone with a mental health issue, I've done it once and will never again.

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

I'm an employer, while I'll do my best for my employees and have done in the past I will not knowingly take on someone with a mental health issue, I've done it once and will never again.

yes and thats your opinion, not fact.

and that would be a very ignorant thing to do.

you had one bad experience and have painted everyone with a mental health issue the same.

there but for the grace of god go you or I.

Mrs OBumble

Nototrump wrote: »

My doctor feels I am probably not able for the job at present and to be fair he is right. I just had an appointment with him this afternoon and we agreed I would hand in my months’ notice next week.

Some posters seem to have missed the bolded part.

OP, before doing anything other than what you have agreed with your doctor - you need to go back to the doctor again and discuss it with him. It well may be that the doctor thinks you need a complete break, not just a 3-month respite, to be receptive to treatment. (Or else he would have suggested this route in the first place.)

Good luck. In my book, looking after your health is more important than your wealth. With proper treatment - that you engage with - you are likely to be well able for a good job again in the future, and to get one.

When it comes to future job applications - you don't need to tell them why you were off in detail, just that you were sick but have since recovered.

drunkmonkey

livedadream wrote: »

yes and thats your opinion, not fact.

and that would be a very ignorant thing to do.

Why is it ignorant to protect my current staff and business. I make no opologies for it and don't even dream of telling me mental health issues can't have a knock on effect on other staff.
My advice was to stay on with her current job, I gave her an honest opinion of how another employer might view the situation, calling that opinion ignorant is OTT as most employers would echo my sentiment.

Mrs OBumble

drunkmonkey wrote: »

most employers would echo my sentiment.

They might (I would) - except that the OP has had medical advice to leave.

In my eyes, that's a game-changer: if a health professional who knows the OP and the situation says to leave, then it's time to leave.

drunkmonkey

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

They might (I would) - except that the OP has had medical advice to leave.

In my eyes, that's a game-changer: if a health professional who knows the OP and the situation says to leave, then it's time to leave.

It sounds like a good job, I'd be taking reduced hours or the 3mts before pulling the plug, no income could add to the problem.

seamus

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

In my eyes, that's a game-changer: if a health professional who knows the OP and the situation says to leave, then it's time to leave.

Like I've said; the OP should obviously trust his doctor, but there is a gulf between diagnosing a medical condition and providing career guidance with a mental health focus.

Unless the source of the OP's issue is their job (and it doesn't seem to be), then it would seem to be something of a rash move to just jack it in and start searching elsewhere. The GP may have no clue what hunting for a job is like, how stressful the first few months in any role are.

Before making any drastic life choices in an attempt to improve your mental health, a specialist professional should assist in determining if this is a good course of action. All respect to the doctor but "maybe you should quit your job" sounds like an incredibly blase suggestion for what is a large life change.

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

Why is it ignorant to protect my current staff and business. I make no opologies for it and don't even dream of telling me mental health issues can't have a knock on effect on other staff.
My advice was to stay on with her current job, I gave her an honest opinion of how another employer might view the situation, calling that opinion ignorant is OTT as most employers would echo my sentiment.

im an employer i dont echo your sentiment, ive told you what i think of it.

because you are basing your opinion of everyone with mental health issues on one person.

there is a huge difference for example between someone with anxiety and someone with Schizophrenia...same as someone with depression versus someone with post natal depression.
the list goes on.

you are tarring everyone with a mental health issue as unemployable.

drunkmonkey

livedadream wrote: »

im an employer i dont echo your sentiment, ive told you what i think of it.

because you are basing your opinion of everyone with mental health issues on one person.

there is a huge difference for example between someone with anxiety and someone with Schizophrenia...same as someone with depression versus someone with post natal depression.
the list goes on.

you are tarring everyone with a mental health issue as unemployable.

I'm basing it on multiple people not just one, I said I employed one knowing that there was a previous mental health condition but thought it was behind them.
Regardless, I'm not sure what kind of diligent business owner would take on someone knowing they could be absent a lot or effect the mental health of other employees, that's just reckless when there are other candidates to choose from.
There's state schemes to take on people with diminished capacity. I'd assume that's why you would take them on.

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

I'm basing it on multiple people not just one, I said I employed one knowing that there was a previous mental health condition but thought it was behind them.
Regardless, I'm not sure what kind of diligent business owner would take on someone knowing they could be absent a lot or effect the mental health of other employees, that's just reckless when there are other candidates to choose from.
There's state schemes to take on people with diminished capacity. I'd assume that's why you would take them on.

your showing your ignorance by calling someone with a mental illness someone with a diminished capacity.
its 2016 mate. we dont lock people up for having a mental illness anymore.

Killgore Trout

drunkmonkey wrote: »

I'm basing it on multiple people not just one, I said I employed one knowing that there was a previous mental health condition but thought it was behind them.
Regardless, I'm not sure what kind of diligent business owner would take on someone knowing they could be absent a lot or effect the mental health of other employees, that's just reckless when there are other candidates to choose from.
There's state schemes to take on people with diminished capacity. I'd assume that's why you would take them on.

Your attitude to metal health as an employer, and a human being, is so appalling and ignorant I don't even know where to begin.

If you display such a basic lack of empathy towards your employees as you do in your posts here you must engender a very negative work environment.

drunkmonkey

livedadream wrote: »

your showing your ignorance by calling someone with a mental illness someone with a diminished capacity.
its 2016 mate. we dont lock people up for having a mental illness anymore.

Killgore Trout wrote: »

Your attitude to metal health as an employer, and a human being, is so appalling and ignorant I don't even know where to begin.

If you display such a basic lack of empathy towards your employees as you do in your posts here you must engender a very negative work environment.

Give it a rest, your not willingly introducing a new employee with anxiety/depression into an otherwise healthy work invironment.
I'm really struggling to believe your a business owner as you implied if it doesn't cross you a second thought when choosing an employee.

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

Give it a rest, your not willingly introducing a new employee with anxiety/depression into an otherwise healthy work invironment.
I'm really struggling to believe your a business owner as you implied if it doesn't cross you a second thought when choosing an employee.

firstly learn to read mate i didnt say im a business owner.
I'm an employer for a multinational. HR BP if you want to know not that you do.

and there is no way to know in an interview if someone has a mental illness.

and its illegal to ask.

a medical would not necessarily show it up unless they told the Doc and even then unless it effects their job you wouldnt be told.

from reading your posts here and in other threads im guessing you run a small or middle sized business in some back and beyond where everyone knows everyones business and you get away with murder because people have no option but to work for you due to lack of opportunies.

your opinion is bigoted and disrespectful and paints you in a terrible light. but close minded people rarely care what other people say. so keep on discriminating against people with a mental illness im sure it will bring you nothing but joy in your life.

then again you did say this:

Where to find CV's & Staff on the cheap

so lets call a spade a spade.

runawaybishop

No one will knowingly employ someone who could miss significant time off work due to ill health. Don't pretend any practical manager would.

livedadream

runawaybishop wrote: »

No one will knowingly employ someone who could miss significant time off work due to ill health. Don't pretend any practical manager would.

im not saying that at all

what drunk monkey is saying is that he/she wouldnt hire someone with a mental illness. there is not way of knowing that someone will miss significant days alot of mental illness is managable.

I have a chronic illness (physical not mental), but its managable I rarely miss days however if i do have to i can work from home or manage my time.

It didnt stop my org hiring me, the same way as if someone told me that they had depression but managed it it wouldnt bother me.

You cant judge people based on an illness. if they say its managed you take them at their word, and manage it if it does effect the business, you dont not give them a chance because they might miss days.

its the same cycle as unemployed people not getting jobs because they dont have up to date experience or have gaps in their CV, it doesnt make them bad workers or incapable.

drunkmonkey

livedadream wrote: »

firstly learn to read mate i didnt say im a business owner.
I'm an employer for a multinational. HR BP if you want to know not that you do.

and there is no way to know in an interview if someone has a mental illness.

and its illegal to ask.

a medical would not necessarily show it up unless they told the Doc and even then unless it effects their job you wouldnt be told.

from reading your posts here and in other threads im guessing you run a small or middle sized business in some back and beyond where everyone knows everyones business and you get away with murder because people have no option but to work for you due to lack of opportunies.

your opinion is bigoted and disrespectful and paints you in a terrible light. but close minded people rarely care what other people say. so keep on discriminating against people with a mental illness im sure it will bring you nothing but joy in your life.

then again you did say this: so lets call a spade a spade.

First off you said "my organisation" it's not your organisation. It's your employers. You implied it was yours.

As long as OP sticks to jobs in corporations like BP she'll be grand. Don't go near small or medium sized business as there knuckle dragging ignorant cavemen. Christ your arrogance is unbelievable.

Enough of the personal attacks and assumptions about my employees and their mental health, your bang out of order.

BaaLamb

drunkmonkey wrote: »

Give it a rest, your not willingly introducing a new employee with anxiety/depression into an otherwise healthy work invironment.
I'm really struggling to believe your a business owner as you implied if it doesn't cross you a second thought when choosing an employee.

Seriously? So if someone had diabetes or asthma say, would you exclude them as employees also? No wonder people are afraid to talk about mental health issues. You should be downright ashamed of your attitude :mad::mad:

BaaLamb

drunkmonkey wrote: »

I'm basing it on multiple people not just one, I said I employed one knowing that there was a previous mental health condition but thought it was behind them.
Regardless, I'm not sure what kind of diligent business owner would take on someone knowing they could be absent a lot or effect the mental health of other employees, that's just reckless when there are other candidates to choose from.
There's state schemes to take on people with diminished capacity. I'd assume that's why you would take them on.

Diminished capacity? As a sufferer of anxiety and depression I am beyond offended and disgusted by your comments.

drunkmonkey

BaaLamb wrote: »

Seriously? So if someone had diabetes or asthma say, would you exclude them as employees also? No wonder people are afraid to talk about mental health issues. You should be downright ashamed of your attitude :mad::mad:

Of course not with a physical problem, but I would exclude someone with a mental health problem if it would effect there ability to work at full capacity.
Why should I be ashamed for protecting my business and employees? I'm not a charity or state sponsored.

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

First off you said "my organisation" it's not your organisation. It's your employers. You implied it was yours.

*youre

my org because im a part of it and I run the human side of it.

drunkmonkey wrote: »

As long as OP sticks to jobs in corporations like BP she'll be grand. Don't go near small or medium sized business as there knuckle dragging ignorant cavemen.

you said it not me mate.

drunkmonkey wrote: »

Enough of the personal attacks and assumptions about my employees and their mental health, your bang out of order.

*youre

im right though, you said it in a few other posts, small company cant get staff, maybe you cant get staff because people realise what youre like. lacking basic empathy for other human beings.

im bang out of order? youre the one saying people with mental illness are incapable: you used the phrase ''diminished capacity''. like who seiroulsy even thinks that these days?

says more about you than it does them mate. OP needs to focus more on her own health than the assholes of the world who will judge her for an illness she has little or no control over.

drunkmonkey

BaaLamb wrote: »

Diminished capacity? As a sufferer of anxiety and depression I am beyond offended and disgusted by your comments.

Yes there are grants for taking on people who can't work at full capacity. That's they way it's worded when there trying to get your to take on people.

drunkmonkey

runawaybishop wrote: »

No one will knowingly employ someone who could miss significant time off work due to ill health. Don't pretend any practical manager would.

Thankfully someone understands.

livedadream

drunkmonkey wrote: »

Yes there are grants for taking on people who can't work at full capacity. That's they way it's worded when there trying to get your to take on people.

people with mental illness do not have a diminished capacity for work.

you are a disgrace and like ive said before i hope you never suffer from an illness you have no control over and dont meet someone with the same opinion as you.

your lack of humanity and basic respect or empathy for your fellow humans is abhorrant to me.

clemop

Nototrump, I'd suggest talking to your personnel manager/HR about the situation before you make any decisions. They may be flexible in terms of granting a leave of absence, especially as it sounds like they've been very understanding in the past. I've previously had people working for me who suffered from depression and it's not difficult to create some breathing space for people. That's obviously dependent on the industry and size of business but the first step has to be letting your manager know about the issue.
Worst case scenario is they decline the request for a leave of absence in which case you can consider your options.