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Louise O Neill on rape culture.

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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,105 ✭✭✭drugstore cowboy


    Dunno if this has been posted and don't have time to check back but it seems LON has been caught rotten.

    She said this recently
    Most recently, we discussed the ethical subtext of going to see Manchester By The Sea, the movie which won Casey Affleck an Oscar for best actor at this year’s Academy Awards.

    Despite rave reviews, I refused to see it due to two sexual harassment cases that had been brought against Affleck by a female producer, Amanda White, and director of photography, Magdalena Gorka, both of whom had worked with Affleck on a previous project.

    The allegations were extensive and disturbing, ranging from a daily diet of highly sexualised, offensive comments, abusive texts messages when White refused to have sex with Affleck, to physical intimidation where Gorka claimed she woke in the middle of the night to find Affleck lying in bed next to her.

    The cases were settled for undisclosed terms out of court in 2010..

    Since I was aware of this story, I felt that going to see the film would be a betrayal of my feminist principles.

    And this from a recent interview she gave
    The movie you always rewatch?

    LON: Heathers is so wonderfully quotable. ‘**** me gently with a chainsaw’ is my favourite line ever.


    Somebody went and found this in a few seconds
    In 1997, Slater was convicted of assaulting his then-girlfriend, Michelle Jonas, and a police officer while under the influence of drugs and alcohol. He spent over 100 days in a rehabilitation facility while out on bail and then was sentenced to a three-month term in jail followed by three months in a residential rehab center.

    On May 24, 2005, Slater was arrested in Manhattan, New York, after he allegedly sexually harassed a woman on the street. A video of Slater being arrested was recorded and shown on television. Slater was charged with third degree sexual abuse and was held at the 19th precinct in Manhattan.


    The charges seemed to have been dropped and he was told to stay out of trouble but Mr Slater ain't no man a feminist like LON should like.Keep up the struggle Louise :cool:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    Tbf (not that I think LON deserves anyone being fair to her in this regard) but her point is that she believes men who are charged with, or alleged to be guilty of, sexual crimes deserve to fail at the box office and so she encourages boycotting their films to achieve that aim.

    Heathers was back in '89 (IMDB says '88 but I'm sure I brought one of my first girlfriends to it then - awww) and so her no longer saying she likes it wouldn't effect how it (and he) did financially and so a retrospective boycott would be pointless.

    Not saying she's right to believe the nonsense she does now... boycotting films when someone hasn't been found guilty of anything is absurd. 'Settled out of court' means nothing when you're famous either. Can sometimes just be a decision made to avoid damage to reputation and/or a lengthy trial. Not always of course but enough times to make boycotting the work of any celebs who take that route an absurdity.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    Tbf (not that I think LON deserves anyone being fair to her in this regard) but her point is that she believes men who are charged with, or alleged to be guilty of, sexual crimes deserve to fail at the box office and so she encourages boycotting their films to achieve that aim.

    Heathers was back in '89 (IMDB says '88 but I'm sure I brought one of my first girlfriends to it then - awww) and so her no longer saying she likes it wouldn't effect how it (and he) did financially and so a retrospective boycott would be pointless.

    Not saying she's right to believe the nonsense she does now... boycotting films when someone hasn't been found guilty of anything is absurd. 'Settled out of court' means nothing when you're famous either. Can sometimes just be a decision made to avoid damage to reputation and/or a lengthy trial. Not always of course but enough times to make boycotting the work of any celebs who take that route an absurdity.

    Normally I would agree-but Slater has had films in cinemas since, such as Nymphomaniac volumes 1 and 2, and Igor, and appearances on Phineas and Ferb, among other, noteworthy, tv shows.

    However, what is also noteworthy is that she doesn't give a mention to the Irish folks-Michael Fassbender is accused of violence towards a woman-which I find questionable since the charges were dropped and she returned to dating him too. LoN didn't give him a mention-cos he's Irish, or good looking, perhaps?
    I also note she didn't accidentally libel herself-mentioning the usual suspects like Sean Penn-who was accused of abusing Madonna. Something Madonna recently stated never happened.

    Anyways. LoN has said that the accusation is enough-not the court of law, but rather the guilty until proven innocent rule of thumb feminists seem to go for. And even then being found innocent doesn't count unless the judge is either a woman, or a minority.

    LoN specifically mentioned Depp-and Depp has never been charged with anything related to domestic violence. That said, Amber was.arrested for hitting her ex-never mentioned that, eh LoN?
    Gibson was charged, yes-and reached a plea deal.
    But for LoN-that is not enough. Nobody is redeemed in her eyes. I will say, to me, a rapist cannot be redeemed-they are beyond redemption, tbh.

    She failed, at the time, to mention folks like Kobe Bryant, Michael Jackson, or Tupac who were far from white, yet committed alleged crimes of rape, child molestation, and rape. (Tupac did time in jail for the last one).
    But they were all highly successful afterwards.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 945 ✭✭✭red ears


    LoN specifically mentioned Depp-and Depp has never been charged with anything related to domestic violence. That said, Amber was.arrested for hitting her ex-never mentioned that, eh LoN?
    .

    That's a bit of an eye opener, generally a violent domestic abuser repeats the crime. I'd imagine she was violent to depp.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,390 ✭✭✭please helpThank YOU


    Brian Bank pro football player in the united states falsely accused of rape crime. You can see the picture of this grown man cry that is hurt in this man eyes.


  • Registered Users Posts: 52 ✭✭Smegmaniac17


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hog9Nlf-dRs

    Any thoughts on this video folks???


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,390 ✭✭✭please helpThank YOU


    The list of people false accused of rape and other crimes is Staggering here is a small sample list of people who have been wronged by this rape culture Louis O Neill talks about. Cliff Ricard, Michael Le Vell ,Lord Leon Brittan, Jim Davidson, Ched Evans, Prime Minister Sir, Edward Heath, Nigel Evans MP, Lord Bramell , William Roache, Freddie Starr, DJ Neil Fox,. and for some Men its to much like Jay Cheshire hanged himself from a tree he could not cope /distraught over false rape accusations this Man is Dead .


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,309 Mod ✭✭✭✭mzungu


    The list of people false accused of rape and other crimes is Staggering here is a small sample list of people who have been wrong by this rape culture Louis O Neill talks about. Cliff Ricard, Michael Le Vell ,Lord Leon Brittan, Jim Davidson, Ched Evans, Prime Minister Sir, Edward Heath, Nigel Evans MP, Lord Bramell , William Roache, Freddie Starr, DJ Neil Fox,. and for some Men its to much like Jay Cheshire hanged himself from a tree he could not cope /distraught over false rape accusations this Man is Dead .
    I am not sure about the details of all the above cases, but I think some of them were wronged by an overzealous police force trying to make up for leaving Saville get away with it.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,390 ✭✭✭please helpThank YOU


    mzungu wrote: »
    I am not sure about the details of all the above cases, but I think some of them were wronged by an overzealous police force trying to make up for leaving Saville get away with it.
    You are 100 per cent right what you say about Saville and the overzealous police
    Cliff Ricard is Suing the BBC/Police. Cliff Ricard made a very good point if he was not Rich how does say working Man/Women defend them selves ?. like say example a bricklayer he would not have the money to clear his/her name in the courts our pay for the best Solicitors/Barrister like the police/Garda have against the Innocent Man/Women.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,584 ✭✭✭ligerdub


    Pretty sure Heath was a true one.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,584 ✭✭✭ligerdub


    Pretty sure Heath was a true one.


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,633 ✭✭✭✭Widdershins


    It's been debated whether the LON type of extreme anti white male mentality is really that common outside of her bubble and how much influence she could have on younger girls. I've just seen a Twitter post by a Teen Vogue columnist, Lara Witt. It says '' Also white people are evil. Whiteness is evil.''


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,309 Mod ✭✭✭✭mzungu


    The list of people false accused of rape and other crimes is Staggering here is a small sample list of people who have been wrong by this rape culture Louis O Neill talks about. Cliff Ricard, Michael Le Vell ,Lord Leon Brittan, Jim Davidson, Ched Evans, Prime Minister Sir, Edward Heath, Nigel Evans MP, Lord Bramell , William Roache, Freddie Starr, DJ Neil Fox,. and for some Men its to much like Jay Cheshire hanged himself from a tree he could not cope /distraught over false rape accusations this Man is Dead .
    You are 100 per cent right what you say about Saville and the overzealous police
    Cliff Ricard is Suing the BBC/Police. Cliff Ricard made a very good point if he was not Rich how does say working Man/Women defend them selves ?. like say example a bricklayer he would not have the money to clear his/her name in the courts our pay for the best Solicitors/Barrister like the police/Garda have against the Innocent Man/Women.
    Not in all those cases, but with Cliff Richard the whole affair was like a circus. It had little to do with rape culture, and more to do with knee jerk reactions. The BBC were waiting with a camera crew the day his house was searched. Somebody wanted to be seen doing something. Was he guilty? Was he innocent? At this stage does it matter? Mud sticks. The other people mentioned above I am not familiar with their cases so I won't comment on those. Obviously, when allegations are made the police need to investigate, but they could have done without making a big drama out of it.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,309 Mod ✭✭✭✭mzungu


    It's been debated whether the LON type of extreme anti white male mentality is really that common outside of her bubble and how much influence she could have on younger girls. I've just seen a Twitter post by a Teen Vogue columnist, Lara Witt. It says '' Also white people are evil. Whiteness is evil.''
    That kind of stuff is commonplace on Twitter. Probably trying to get attention no doubt.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,994 ✭✭✭✭gormdubhgorm


    I am amazed at the amount of posts on this thread.
    Louise O'Neill must be delighted (whoever she is).

    All I can think of now is the Nirvana song 'Rape me'.
    I think we sang an Irish version of it in the Gaeltacht called 'tóg mé' as young fellas in a song competition, we didn't win it.

    I blame Louise!

    Guff about stuff, and stuff about guff.



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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,249 ✭✭✭ Holland Helpful Pita


    mzungu wrote: »
    That kind of stuff is commonplace on Twitter. Probably trying to get attention no doubt.

    Since she didn't bother going to the March/protest on International Woman's day after she was "threatening to burn to the place down" in the days before it happened, I cant believe that she believes half the stuff she comes out with (e.g. hatred of Its cold outside song) ...I think its an attempt by her for some attention and pushing her career in the media by saying "controversial" and "edgy" things, Kinda like Katie Hopkins and others as it will raise eyebrows


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    Since she didn't bother going to the March/protest on International Woman's day after she was "threatening to burn to the place down" in the days before it happened, I cant believe that she believes half the stuff she comes out with (e.g. hatred of Its cold outside song) ...I think its an attempt by her for some attention and pushing her career in the media by saying "controversial" and "edgy" things, Kinda like Katie Hopkins and others as it will raise eyebrows

    Agreed but at least Katie Hopkins doesn't avoid debate like LON. Not a chance Louise would go on TLLS (for example) and debate with people who vehemently disagree with her . In fact she campaigned for Hopkins to be removed from TLLS as a guest and so disagree with her as I might, at least she walks her walk to a far greater degree than LON ever does, or ever will.

    But I do agree that much of what she says seems designed to ruffle feathers rather than anything that she believes too deeply. Hence her blocking /muting of anyone that dares to say they like so much as a different breakfast cereal to her. The cynic in me might ponder whether or not her going after Casey Affleck in the press and Twitter recently might have been her attempting to get acquainted with an American feminist audience, what with the film adaption of her first book, Only Ever Yours, due to be released at some stage next year.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    Agreed but at least Katie Hopkins doesn't avoid debate like LON. Not a chance Louise would go on TLLS (for example) and debate with people who vehemently disagree with her . In fact she campaigned for Hopkins to be removed from TLLS as a guest and so disagree with her as I might, at least she walks her walk to a far greater degree than LON ever does, or ever will.

    But I do agree that much of what she says seems designed to ruffle feathers rather than anything that she believes too deeply. Hence her blocking /muting of anyone that dares to say they like so much as a different breakfast cereal to her. The cynic in me might ponder whether or not her going after Casey Affleck in the press and Twitter recently might have been her attempting to get acquainted with an American feminist audience, what with the film adaption of her first book, Only Ever Yours, due to be released at some stage next year.

    Oh definitely-she would be slaughtered if she did-not literally, but verbally. And she won't risk her 'brand' doing that-it's why she went on Tommy Tiernan, where he didn't know who she was, to peddle her wares. She thought she'd have it easy-but even without all the prep, he was still able to challenge her immensely. Imagine someone more prepped for her.

    It's possible-I mean, from a twitter/ facebook standpoint, she could be trying to do just that.
    But it was a very lacklustre attempt to do so if she was. Again, she had not done her research-some very mediocre writing on the subject too.

    As far as the film being out next year-yeah, I would hesitate to even say that. At present, it has no director, no screenplay, no screenplay writer (rarely does a writer adapt their own work to screen-if they do, they usually have much experience doing so) no actors, and many other things.
    Also, with the adaptation of The Handmaiden's tale coming to Hulu-it may lead to the adaptation not happening.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,309 Mod ✭✭✭✭mzungu


    Since she didn't bother going to the March/protest on International Woman's day after she was "threatening to burn to the place down" in the days before it happened, I cant believe that she believes half the stuff she comes out with (e.g. hatred of Its cold outside song) ...I think its an attempt by her for some attention and pushing her career in the media by saying "controversial" and "edgy" things, Kinda like Katie Hopkins and others as it will raise eyebrows
    I think it was somebody else from a US magazine that said it going by Widdershins post above. But it is a fairly general statement (for Twitter anyways) among that type of cohort.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,105 ✭✭✭drugstore cowboy


    Oh definitely-she would be slaughtered if she did-not literally, but verbally. And she won't risk her 'brand' doing that-it's why she went on Tommy Tiernan, where he didn't know who she was, to peddle her wares. She thought she'd have it easy-but even without all the prep, he was still able to challenge her immensely. Imagine someone more prepped for her.

    It's possible-I mean, from a twitter/ facebook standpoint, she could be trying to do just that.
    But it was a very lacklustre attempt to do so if she was. Again, she had not done her research-some very mediocre writing on the subject too.

    As far as the film being out next year-yeah, I would hesitate to even say that. At present, it has no director, no screenplay, no screenplay writer (rarely does a writer adapt their own work to screen-if they do, they usually have much experience doing so) no actors, and many other things.
    Also, with the adaptation of The Handmaiden's tale coming to Hulu-it may lead to the adaptation not happening.

    Am I right in thinking Una Mulally pulled out of an abortion debate that was due to take place on TLLS? She was being called a coward and lacking the ability to win the debate by the guy who was due on the show to counter her arguments.

    I think Una recently moved on to the lack of female festival headliners in Ireland.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,249 ✭✭✭ Holland Helpful Pita


    Una pulled out over a talk about has political correctness gone too far, im guessing she pulled out as she'd be slaughtered if she went against someone who disagreed with her (Ian Docherty then lost the plot - so she came out the winner )


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,337 ✭✭✭Wombatman


    Doting father and solid GAA club man......... wot?????

    NKpy794.png


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    Yes, 'doting father' in that that is how he WAS seen in the local community. I don't think anybody would henceforth describe him as such but I see the twitterazi are acting as if they would this morning. Guess they missed the following:
    "People were curious as to what happened I suppose, and then the word spread that he was arrested for some sort of sexual abuse. People were absolutely shocked, the GAA club took him off committees at once, and he moved away and rented somewhere, and faded out of the community," the local woman explained.

    "It was difficult to believe. You would never have suspected anything about his past."

    People could not believe that a man who seemed so 'normal' could have such a history.

    "It's horrific. You think you know somebody, and then this comes out. There are no words to describe it," the local woman said.

    The main focus now is on caring for and protecting McCarville's wife and children, and her parents, who are all very well respected members of the community.
    People in the community are understandably cautious in explaining their thoughts and views.

    But one man summed up how the parish feel about McCarville's wife and family.

    "They are all innocent, and we all need to reinforce our support for them. If we are so shocked by his actions we can only imagine how difficult it is for them."


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    Yes, 'doting father' in that that is how he WAS seen in the local community. I don't think anybody would henceforth describe him as such but I see the twitterazi are acting as if they would this morning. Guess they missed the following:

    Yeah, they also noted how, bizarrely, he 'just stopped'-like, seemingly stopped raping the kids.

    For a sexual predator such as him, usually they do not forgo their abhorrent behaviours-they continue. But he didn't.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    Oh Lon... you make this too easy...

    Talking about objectification of Dan Stevens from Beauty and the Beast, and also completely missing the point of Stockholm syndrome.

    https://twitter.com/oneilllo/status/845559530306097152


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,390 ✭✭✭please helpThank YOU


    Oh Lon... you make this too easy...

    Talking about objectification of Dan Stevens from Beauty and the Beast, and also completely missing the point of Stockholm syndrome.

    https://twitter.com/oneilllo/status/845559530306097152
    Einstein theory ?:eek:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    ..completely missing the point of Stockholm syndrome.

    She also seemingly misses the whole point of Beauty & The Beast as she was complaining during the week that the Beast wasn't as hot in the film as he was in the animated version......

    As for the whole Stockholm thing, feminists have been on about that for a while now, so much so that Emma Watson even addressed it in an interview.




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    Reading her comments about the 'abusive men' deserve to fail-I wonder if she would turn around and say 'sorry production company who worked on Manchester by the sea'- I don't want anything to do with you.
    Doubt it, more than likely she would take the money and run.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,074 ✭✭✭blackwhite


    That's just wrong-won't be using that page again-what's the point? Discourse is important, completely.
    I could understand it if the messages were of the 'I hate....insert ethnic, religious, minority group here'-but if you have an opinion you disagree with-shouldn't you be allowed challenge it?

    I knew the site was going downhill-but that badly is just a joke, tbh. Wonder if this will apply to posters who criticise the Journal's owner, Denis O'Brien?


    http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/jj-barnes/the-world-needs-angry-mot_b_15294434.html

    I found this article to be quite disturbing-not for the elements she included, but for certain quotes from within-notably.


    Besides being article she, the author, uses to promote her work-this paragraph leapt out at me like a hot dagger.
    Really? So circumcision does not count as being 'cut'? It's carried out in so-called civilised society. Boys are routinely abused, on a daily basis-even teachers who see a boy beating beaten the hell out of will just look at it and say 'oh, that's just boys being boys' (I even know a few current folks teaching who have said this to me). Girls, on the other hand...
    And I don't care how many children are sold as prostitutes-primarily because one is too much. If it's more boys than girls, or more girls than boys-that is still far too many. And abuse is pretty even, tbqh. The rate of sexual abuse is higher among girls, yes, but the rate of physical abuse is higher among boys. And the statistics about 'men being more evil'...yeah, I call BS on that. We know the domestic violence rates are even keel among men and women, women being more likely to seek help.

    There are more statistics in that article-but her 'anger' made me angry-for all the opposite reasons. Her statistics were haphazard at best, loose at worst.

    http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/daniel-cieslak-walks-free-from-court-after-admitting-raping-girl-12_uk_58cbd5bbe4b0be71dcf3c3dd

    This article I find troubling. For one thing, the accused believe the girl, a minor, was at least 16 (legal consenting age in the uk)-others noted she seemed closer to 20. So to completely put blame on him is a tad unfair, to say the least. The headline, 'man accused of rape walks free' is a misnomer-no force was used, there wasn't an element of danger involved. He genuinely believed she was of the age to consent (and she consented, despite her age), as did others, such as the taxi driver. In fact, he completely broke down crying when he learned she was underage. He met her at 4am that morning, in a taxi bay-most of us would assume a minor would not be out past that time.
    I have no doubt that in this situation, both were victims. But for different reasons.

    The Journal is owned by the same people as own boards.

    Are there really people in this country stupid enough to think that DOB owns the Journal?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    http://www.independent.ie/entertainment/television/tv-news/amanda-brunker-my-fractious-relationship-with-neil-prendeville-looks-like-it-could-be-over-35581909.html

    http://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/entertainment/amanda-brunker-sick-of-sharing-tv-screen-with-neil-prendeville-783887.html

    Claims she's a feminist, claims she's strong, claims to be independent, has an entire segment dedicated to her and her 'botox' on the late late show, so much so that it went over time-leaving a talented musician, with, ya know, talent waiting in the wings as she couldn't go on due to bad Late Late show management...

    Then has the gall to claim she 'doesn't want to share' with a man, accusing him of 'mansplaining'...

    Really, feminism just turns folks into immature children. It seriously does...and then making a 'threat' as her final line...a man would be vilified for this crap.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,249 ✭✭✭ Holland Helpful Pita


    http://www.independent.ie/entertainment/television/tv-news/amanda-brunker-my-fractious-relationship-with-neil-prendeville-looks-like-it-could-be-over-35581909.html

    http://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/entertainment/amanda-brunker-sick-of-sharing-tv-screen-with-neil-prendeville-783887.html

    Claims she's a feminist, claims she's strong, claims to be independent, has an entire segment dedicated to her and her 'botox' on the late late show, so much so that it went over time-leaving a talented musician, with, ya know, talent waiting in the wings as she couldn't go on due to bad Late Late show management...

    Then has the gall to claim she 'doesn't want to share' with a man, accusing him of 'mansplaining'...

    Really, feminism just turns folks into immature children. It seriously does...and then making a 'threat' as her final line...a man would be vilified for this crap.

    Honestly it's Amanda Brunker - she's Desperate for any attention


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,390 ✭✭✭please helpThank YOU


    In My Opinion Amanda Brunker Loves Attention I had Totally Forgot About Her.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,074 ✭✭✭blackwhite


    http://www.independent.ie/entertainment/television/tv-news/amanda-brunker-my-fractious-relationship-with-neil-prendeville-looks-like-it-could-be-over-35581909.html

    http://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/entertainment/amanda-brunker-sick-of-sharing-tv-screen-with-neil-prendeville-783887.html

    Claims she's a feminist, claims she's strong, claims to be independent, has an entire segment dedicated to her and her 'botox' on the late late show, so much so that it went over time-leaving a talented musician, with, ya know, talent waiting in the wings as she couldn't go on due to bad Late Late show management...

    Then has the gall to claim she 'doesn't want to share' with a man, accusing him of 'mansplaining'...

    Really, feminism just turns folks into immature children. It seriously does...and then making a 'threat' as her final line...a man would be vilified for this crap.

    I think it's more of a reflection on Brunker that she was willing to park her "feminist" principles for long enough to co-host with Prendeville to begin with.

    If she's ok with his well-publicised behaviour before hosting the TV show, then what she is accusing him of now pales in comparison.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,386 ✭✭✭RabbleRouser2k


    https://www.instagram.com/p/BSlgYYnBVsv/

    "A woman just approached me in the queue in H&M and asked if I was Rosemary. "Hi!" she said. "Are you Rosemary?" I'm clearly getting too big for my boots, because I assumed she was going to tell me she's a big fan. She watches my snaps every day; she loves my dog. I told her that I was, indeed, Rosemary. I smiled and said hello and I shook her hand. I have a good handshake, I think. It's firm but not too firm and my hands are always warm (but never clammy). I'm pretty sure it's a good handshake. "We had a discussion online a few weeks ago, around the time that you wrote that piece about rape," she said. "I just wanted to introduce myself, to show you that I'm a real person. I'm not a troll. I'm a well-educated woman." I still wasn't sure where this was going, although I was beginning to get the impression that it wasn't going anywhere good. "I just wanted to speak to you, in person, face to face, and to tell you that you had no right. You have a responsibility... not to portray things... You don't get to define what happened to you as rape, when rape..." I don't remember her exact words. I remember that she had braces and blonde hair and that she had said the word "rape", pretty loudly, three times, in H&M off Dame St. There were women everywhere – many of whom will have heard that word enough in this life already. (Haven't we all?) So I interrupted her for them, but also for me – because I spent a week defending my my lived experience from the judgement of strangers, and I don't want to keep doing it, in person, in H&M – and I said, "This isn't the time for this conversation." She disagreed. "I think it is the time! I think it is!" I turned around and rejoined the queue. "Well I think you're disgraceful!" she shouted. "I think you're disgusting!" I'm not sure what she wanted – to show me that she wasn't someone who is only angry and aggressive and vitriolic online? Or did she hope that, by accosting me in public to dismiss my rape story, I would break down and tell her I misinterpreted things and I was sorry and should have said no a fourth time? Anyway. Now I'm drinking tea and shaking a bit and it's a sunny and beautiful day but it doesn't feel like it."


    On the one hand, I commend the person for challenging her, on the other, RMC still changes it for her own narrative. But I do admire that there are women out there who disagree with the 'seeming' narrative.

    And her 'horror' at someone standing up to her is quite symptomatic of the 'twitterati'.


  • Registered Users Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    Have to share this although it might be offensive to some.

    My college going 21 old sister was having a few drinks with DLH and other people tonight.

    DLH tentatively broached the subject of feminism with his only sister.

    To my pride she replied with.

    Quote: "Only bad looking yokes who can't get boyfriends are into that"

    Beautifully said, this girl is going to go far in life.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    DLH tentatively broached the subject of feminism with his only sister.

    To my pride she replied with.

    Quote: "Only bad looking yokes who can't get boyfriends are into that"

    Beautifully said, this girl is going to go far in life.

    Erm, it's a bit obvious but...Naomi Wolff?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,039 ✭✭✭✭retro:electro


    https://www.instagram.com/p/BSlgYYnBVsv/

    "A woman just approached me in the queue in H&M and asked if I was Rosemary. "Hi!" she said. "Are you Rosemary?" I'm clearly getting too big for my boots, because I assumed she was going to tell me she's a big fan. She watches my snaps every day; she loves my dog. I told her that I was, indeed, Rosemary. I smiled and said hello and I shook her hand. I have a good handshake, I think. It's firm but not too firm and my hands are always warm (but never clammy). I'm pretty sure it's a good handshake. "We had a discussion online a few weeks ago, around the time that you wrote that piece about rape," she said. "I just wanted to introduce myself, to show you that I'm a real person. I'm not a troll. I'm a well-educated woman." I still wasn't sure where this was going, although I was beginning to get the impression that it wasn't going anywhere good. "I just wanted to speak to you, in person, face to face, and to tell you that you had no right. You have a responsibility... not to portray things... You don't get to define what happened to you as rape, when rape..." I don't remember her exact words. I remember that she had braces and blonde hair and that she had said the word "rape", pretty loudly, three times, in H&M off Dame St. There were women everywhere – many of whom will have heard that word enough in this life already. (Haven't we all?) So I interrupted her for them, but also for me – because I spent a week defending my my lived experience from the judgement of strangers, and I don't want to keep doing it, in person, in H&M – and I said, "This isn't the time for this conversation." She disagreed. "I think it is the time! I think it is!" I turned around and rejoined the queue. "Well I think you're disgraceful!" she shouted. "I think you're disgusting!" I'm not sure what she wanted – to show me that she wasn't someone who is only angry and aggressive and vitriolic online? Or did she hope that, by accosting me in public to dismiss my rape story, I would break down and tell her I misinterpreted things and I was sorry and should have said no a fourth time? Anyway. Now I'm drinking tea and shaking a bit and it's a sunny and beautiful day but it doesn't feel like it."


    On the one hand, I commend the person for challenging her, on the other, RMC still changes it for her own narrative. But I do admire that there are women out there who disagree with the 'seeming' narrative.

    And her 'horror' at someone standing up to her is quite symptomatic of the 'twitterati'.

    I commend that person for standing up to her. However, maybe the H&M queue wasn't the best place? Still though, if you are going to write, what you admit to be a very black and white and controversial piece, well guess what, real people are going to find it offensive and not just anonymous eggs on Twitter.
    Rosemary looks to be totally milking the situation, almost presenting it as some kind of harassment. She's gotten loads of "omg Hun are you okay xxx she's a troll never mind her", in the comments.

    That's what happens when you have buyers remorse and decide 15 years later you were raped.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,203 ✭✭✭Parchment


    Have to share this although it might be offensive to some.

    My college going 21 old sister was having a few drinks with DLH and other people tonight.

    DLH tentatively broached the subject of feminism with his only sister.

    To my pride she replied with.

    Quote: "Only bad looking yokes who can't get boyfriends are into that"

    Beautifully said, this girl is going to go far in life.

    Amanda De Cadenet....?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,177 ✭✭✭mrsdewinter


    anna080 wrote: »
    I commend that person for standing up to her. However, maybe the H&M queue wasn't the best place? Still though, if you are going to write, what you admit to be a very black and white and controversial piece, well guess what, real people are going to find it offensive and not just anonymous eggs on Twitter.
    Rosemary looks to be totally milking the situation, almost presenting it as some kind of harassment. She's gotten loads of "omg Hun are you okay xxx she's a troll never mind her", in the comments.

    That's what happens when you have buyers remorse and decide 15 years later you were raped.

    I'd love to read the other woman's account of what happened. It's true, starting a whole conversation about it in the Q at H&M isn't ideal but did Rosemary suggest taking the discussion to a coffee shop?


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  • Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 26,403 Mod ✭✭✭✭Peregrine


    The last two resurrections of this thread have just been posts about random feminists on twitter or elsewhere. There have been plenty of warnings to stick to the topic of LON. Time to put this thread to bed. It has well and truly run its course.


This discussion has been closed.
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