How come Tinder is so difficult?

Kal El

The Talking Bread wrote: »

Gel, haircut, cutting their nails, clearing their ear wax, shaving, aftershave!

Wiping your ass!!

Where is the line drawn between being insecure and wanting to modify your body to rid of certain insecurities and taking pride in your appearance which requires you to be out of your natural state!

Or is it just a sexist thing about women and the culture of makeup!

I assume it be similar to the way women arent wholly attracted to over manicured guys or six pack adonis. Obviously some are but Ive heard it said about those guys that they are all insecure "this came from a girl"

Kal El

The Talking Bread wrote: »

If you are into the gym or wear tights, fk off and don't approach me! I just had a shower and applied my hair gel and done some sit ups!

Officially back in the top 1% !!!!!!!!!!!!! Result!

Logs onto Tinder.............40 Matches! Seeya later, I'm calling a girl over for sex!

Youve pretty much through a dig at 4 people here. Im sorry not everyone has the same life as you. People are allowed to have a different view to life than you. Im sorry if youve never been able to get a girl/guy over for sex :rolleyes:

zulutango

I've had many good relationships, some short and sweet, others longer. I value them all. The girls who were into make-up tended to be more insecure. The argument that make up is about expression is grand, and there might be something in that, but to say that a lot of women are not insecure about their looks (and hence resort to make-up) is stretching things. (A lot of men are also insecure about their looks but it manifests differently.) I don't blame women for this insecurity because it's really not their fault. There is so much pressure to look at certain way, and if you don't you're not good enough. I see my nieces going through hell as teenagers, suffering depression, bullying, self-harming, etc., because of this pressure, and the great promise in the women's magazines is that you will be worthy if you just cover over your blemishes. Can anybody here really disagree with that?

How do the women here feel about breast implants? Do women get them because they are insecure about their bodies or is there another reason?

Kal El

Eric Cartman wrote: »

Its a matter of taste, not dishonesty. This notion that makeup (even a little bit) is definitely an improvement is ridiculous.

so many people are so quick to go 'ohh you mean slapped on with a trowel' , obviously that's awful, nobody likes that. But myself and at least one other poster in here have said we prefer none/0/absoloutely not a thing and have just been told 'nah thats lies' 'no way' 'not being honest' Obviously advertising has worked very well since not a single woman has come along to say 'yeah, a woman can look better without any makeup'

I dont agree with your taste buddy, a bit of makeup never hurt anyone. But I feel people are getting into a bit of a huff over you having a different taste. I dont see why people try force everyone to find the same people attractive.

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I know plenty of women who aren't a bit bothered with makeup. You're entitled to find whatever floats your boat attractive, but speak for yourself and not the entire male population. I find tall guys with no body hair, wide shoulders and huge arms with no stubble and a strong jawline attractive, a stylish guy who takes care of himself.

I wouldn't have any interest in a manchild with a beer belly, a hairy chest, a collection of sports jerseys and tiny little arms that wouldn't swat a fly. However, I know a lot of women love a man with a hairy chest.

Different people find different attributes attractive.

I never found the poster above was talking about the male population. If its another poster then my bad

Goya

All this psychoanalysis about insecurity and deception - whatever happened to just wanting to look nice?!

I know there are women who cake themselves in an inch of make-up to hide their skin because they're misfortunate enough to have acne, and women who spend hours grooming and fret about the most inconsequential shyte like eyebrows, but what about the rest of us?

On the male height thing too - I wasn't aware 5ft 11 was considered short?

Flimpson

Flimpson wrote: »

On the male height thing too - I wasn't aware 5ft 11 was considered short?

I wouldn't consider it to be... or 5'10 .. even 5'9 is not that short - Conor McGregor is about this height (maybe even half an inch shorter) and he is able to look proportional and good. I think 5'9 on the dot to 5'7 is a big jump.

zulutango

Flimpson wrote: »

All this psychoanalysis about insecurity and deception - whatever happened to just wanting to look nice?!

Do you look less nice without make-up?

Surreptitious

Flimpson wrote: »

All this psychoanalysis about insecurity and deception - whatever happened to just wanting to look nice?!

I know there are women who cake themselves in an inch of make-up to hide their skin because they're misfortunate enough to have acne, and women who spend hours grooming and fret about the most inconsequential shyte like eyebrows, but what about the rest of us?

On the male height thing too - I wasn't aware 5ft 11 was considered short?

I think he's 5 ft 7 which is not short either. I also think different people like different things. No point judging others on how much make up they wear or whatever, sure we all have faults.

Goya

zulutango wrote: »

Do you look less nice without make-up?

Yes! And the increased attention from men demonstrates this! I don't think I look hideous without make-up and I don't wear much of it, but it does highlight my eyes and lips (the teeniest bit of lip-liner is all) which are my best features.

zulutango

Flimpson wrote: »

Yes! And the increased attention from men demonstrates this! I don't think I look hideous without make-up and I don't wear much of it, but it does highlight my eyes and lips (the teeniest bit of lip-liner is all) which are my best features.

So, therefore you're insecure about your looks! Not massively insecure, but somewhat. Is that fair to say?

mzungu

Flimpson wrote: »

When short men are unhappy about being short reducing their chances of sex/romance, that sucks for them and I wish life was not like that for them. Comparing them to fat women is not comparing like with like either, as excess weight can be lost (difficult, but possible) and height cannot be changed.

If a woman is a bitch to a man because he's short, he's dead right to give her hell back, but if a short man is resentful and hostile towards women just for not fancying him, well the reason for this is obvious but there is no excuse whatsoever. Absolutely none. But it's where a lot of hostility towards women stems from - particularly on the internet (I don't encounter it offline at all).

I have heard this line trotted out many times on this forum. I think height only really matters to the person in question, I don't think anybody else really gives that much of a toss. For example, the shortest guy among my friends is, and has always been, a hit with the ladies. He is now approaching 40 (no spring chicken, beer belly etc) and he still gets chatted up by women much younger than him.

So, I think a lot of this stuff about height being a disadvantage is a defeatist attitude that eventually becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

Salrub

mzungu wrote: »

I have heard this line trotted out many times on this forum. I think height only really matters to the person in question, I don't think anybody else really gives that much of a toss. For example, the shortest guy among my friends is, and has always been a hit with the ladies. He is now approaching 40 (with the belly expanding and all the rest of it) and he still gets chatted up by women much younger than him.

So, I think a lot of this stuff about height being a disadvantage is a defeatist attitude that eventually becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

Yeah I'm not the tallest myself and I sometimes get down about it but like you say it's a defeatist attitude which I'm trying to change my mindset. By the way how tall is your shortest friend your talking about?

Deleted User

Deleted User wrote: »

I wouldn't consider it to be... or 5'10 .. even 5'9 is not short - Conor McGregor is about this height (maybe even half an inch shorter) and he is able to look proportional and good. I think 5'9 on the dot to 5'7 is a big jump.

5'7 is not that short OnionBelt, certainly not short enough for you to have no options.

Shoe lifts such as these would give you that extra couple of inches, and might work wonders on your confidence.

Goya

zulutango wrote: »

So, therefore you're insecure about your looks! Not massively insecure, but somewhat. Is that fair to say?

I don't know if it is. Is wanting to look nicer automatically insecurity? I mean, I only wear make-up when I go out. Never to work, never to anywhere other than going out/events. I think I look grand without make-up but want to look better at certain times.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

I think short guys attitudes sometimes are off putting, when they're completely hung up on, when they tell you they like you cause you're shorter than them, when they tell you how women are vain, when they've a chip on their shoulder.

Nobody should feel bad that they're not attracted to short guys much like nobody should feel bad if they're not attracted to heavily made up women.

The Talking Bread

Kal El wrote: »

. Im sorry if youve never been able to get a girl/guy over for sex :rolleyes:

No, I am not into frequently texting complete and utter strangers to call over to my house that I have never met to guarantee me sex because I seen her online!

I would prefer a girl a tad classier than that.

Trust me, no need to be sorry for me for that!

zulutango

Flimpson wrote: »

I don't know if it is. Is wanting to look nicer automatically insecurity? I mean, I only wear make-up when I go out. Never to work, never to anywhere other than going out/events. I think I look grand without make-up but want to look better at certain times.

Yes, I think it is, logically, isn't it? It seems like you're not very insecure about your looks, and therefore you don't wear much make-up.

Goya

zulutango wrote: »

Yes, I think it is, logically, isn't it? It seems like you're not very insecure about your looks, and therefore you don't wear much make-up.

Grooming/dressing up/looking nicer than the usual means a relative amount of insecurity? Like, a man getting dressed up, polishing his shoes, shaving, putting on aftershave/a bit of moisturiser, styling his hair... where on the scale of insecurity is that?

mzungu

Salrub wrote: »

Yeah I'm not the tallest myself and I sometimes get down about it but like you say it's a defeatist attitude which I'm trying to change my mindset. By the way how tall is your shortest friend your talking about?

At a very rough guess 5"3 or 5"4. The rest of us would all range from 6 to 6"4 and we are mostly complete train wrecks in the romance department.:D So, I just don't subscribe to the whole notion that being short is some kind of insurmoutable obstacle.

Changing your mindset is a good first step Believe me, nobody will care about how small/tall you are.

zulutango

Flimpson wrote: »

Grooming/dressing up/looking nicer than the usual means a relative amount of insecurity? Like, a man getting dressed up, polishing his shoes, shaving, putting on aftershave/a bit of moisturiser, styling his hair... where on the scale of insecurity is that?

Everybody is insecure to some degree. It's a human condition.

One eyed Jack

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Oh I agree - I would never and have never got annoyed or angry at a girl for saying I was too short on a night out (has happened), because I assume in the first place that she might be thinking that. It's more having it confirmed to you that is just depressing in the most literal sense, like it crushes your spirit when you're out, especially when you see lads with not many other redeeming features than their height able to have way more elbow room than me when it comes to having flaws while trying to attract women - when people dismiss with contempt what I'm thinking, feeling, seeing with my own eyes it's like "okay, so nto only do women almost never fancy me over the taller guys, but those same women are disgusted at me for noticing this and not being happy about the situation".

You're definitely only seeing what you want to see there, and that's why you're having all your thoughts confirmed, because you're assuming those women you see are thinking the way you think, when what's happening in reality is that you have no idea what those women see in those guys, and just because you would see them as unattractive for your own reasons, could be every reason why women might find them attractive besides their height.

There are of course procedures you can go through to give you more height, but I was just reading an article on Peter Stringer the other day in the Irish Times (if I find it I'll post it), but at 5'7" his height was actually an advantage in his chosen profession and he actually refused growth hormone treatment as a teenager because he was ultimately happy as he was.

Paul O' Connell is 6'6" and I've known women that have winced at the thoughts of it :pac:

Kal El

Flimpson wrote: »

On the male height thing too - I wasn't aware 5ft 11 was considered short?

When did this happen :eek:
How am I going to tell my mother the bad news

Olishi4

mzungu wrote: »

Changing your mindset is a good first step Believe me, nobody will care about how small/tall you are.

ye I know a man and he's about 5'5 and he gets with loads of women. He was going out with a really stunning girl for a while but all his relationships, it seems end really badly.

I've seen him be really nasty to women, usually women where it's pretty obvious that he is attracted too. He has some insecurity, not sure if it's his height or what. Well anyway lots of women are attracted to him but his personality means none of them stay around.

One eyed Jack

One eyed Jack wrote: »

but I was just reading an article on Peter Stringer the other day in the Irish Times (if I find it I'll post it), but at 5'7" his height was actually an advantage in his chosen profession and he actually refused growth hormone treatment as a teenager because he was ultimately happy as he was.

I've read about Stringer - really admire the guy. As a scrum half at that level he would still be unusally short, but by god he was (and presumably still is) good! The vast majority of top level rugby players would be 5'10 or over, but this is a bit of a tangent ..

Kal El

The Talking Bread wrote: »

No, I am not into frequently texting complete and utter strangers to call over to my house that I have never met to guarantee me sex because I seen her online!

I would prefer a girl a tad classier than that.

Trust me, no need to be sorry for me for that!

I feel sorry for you that you feel its necessary to bring it up. I feel sorry that you judge girls for what they do. Its hardly any of your business what girls get up to. You have a stone age view on dating/womens sexuality. I also feel sorry for you on that. It must be a lonely position on your high horse where you feel you can judge people for living a different life to you :rolleyes:

Goya

Kal El wrote: »

I feel sorry for you that you feel its necessary to bring it up. I feel sorry that you judge girls for what they do. Its hardly any of your business what girls get up to. You have a stone age view on dating/womens sexuality. I also feel sorry for you on that. It must be a lonely position on your high horse where you feel you can judge people for living a different life to you :rolleyes:

Ah he just said he wouldn't find it classy. I wouldn't be insulting about it but it wouldn't be my cup of tea either - doesn't mean I'm on my high horse or have a stone age view on dating/women's sexuality. Extreme promiscuity (men or women) is something a lot of people find very unappealing and being sexually enlightened is also acknowledging this. We all judge, whether positively or negatively - it's only having an opinion on something.

The Talking Bread

Kal El wrote: »

I feel sorry for you that you feel its necessary to bring it up. I feel sorry that you judge girls for what they do. Its hardly any of your business what girls get up to. You have a stone age view on dating/womens sexuality. I also feel sorry for you on that. It must be a lonely position on your high horse where you feel you can judge people for living a different life to you :rolleyes:

Roll your eyes, call me sad and lonely, pity me for my views if you want.

If you think that a guy that considers a guy or girl seeing a tinder profile and deciding to not even meet them but merely just to call them over for sex a tad out of social norm stoneage mindset, that is fair enough!

Don't judge me or pity me or call me lonely or sad for not finding that out of the norm.

Kal El

Flimpson wrote: »

Ah he just said he wouldn't find it classy. I wouldn't be insulting about it but it wouldn't be my cup of tea either - doesn't mean I'm on my high horse or have a stone age view on dating/women's sexuality. Extreme promiscuity (men or women) is something a lot of people find very unappealing and being sexually enlightened is also acknowledging this. We all judge, whether positively or negatively - it's only having an opinion on something.

I understand your view buddy, its your view. But he has been mocking of the very idea for a while. Ignoring the fact that long before tinder came along women/men were getting lucky and enjoying it. Just because its more streamlined now doesnt mean its wrong it just mean its a different view to yours

The Talking Bread

Kal El wrote: »

I understand your view buddy, its your view. But he has been mocking of the very idea for a while. Ignoring the fact that long before tinder came along women/men were getting lucky and enjoying it. Just because its more streamlined now doesnt mean its wrong it just mean its a different view to yours

Well you are calling my views on this stoneage, I am not questioning promiscuity, one night stands etc . You brought it up initially. Sorry I replied!

Salrub

mzungu wrote: »

At a very rough guess 5"3 or 5"4. The rest of us would all range from 6 to 6"4 and we are mostly complete train wrecks in the romance department.:D So, I just don't subscribe to the whole notion that being short is some kind of insurmoutable obstacle.

Changing your mindset is a good first step Believe me, nobody will care about how small/tall you are.

At least I have a couple of inches on him!! Haha. Seriously though it's just when I'm out in a bar or whatever, I have it in my head that women prefer a man to be a good bit taller than them and makes me feel kinda intimidated to go and chat up women when most men around me are taller than me but that's a mindset I hope to change soon

Salrub

Salrub wrote: »

At least I have a couple of inches on him!! Haha. Seriously though it's just when I'm out in a bar or whatever, I have it in my head that women prefer a man to be a good bit taller than them and makes me feel kinda intimidated to go and chat up women when most men around me are taller than me but that's a mindset I hope to change soon

Feel exactly the same - when you look around and you are the shortest man in sight around the bar, it really feels like you are going against the grain, nearly like you expect no women to be interested when her natural references points at that moment are men taller than you. I agree with the poster to a partial degree who said that it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy but there is no denying that the odds are definitely stacked against you - positive mental attitude, provided you can summon it, is all you can do really.

Kal El

The Talking Bread wrote: »

Roll your eyes, call me sad and lonely, pity me for my views if you want.

If you think that a guy that considers a guy or girl seeing a tinder profile and deciding to not even meet them but merely just to call them over for sex a tad out of social norm stoneage mindset, that is fair enough!

Don't judge me or pity me or call me lonely or sad for not finding that out of the norm.

I never called you lonely, read the sentence correctly. You could be surrounded by friends and family but they may not share this stone-age view you have.
Actually I never said you shouldnt have your view, I feel everyone is entitled to there view, but thats all it is. I called you stoneage purely because you are mocking something you dont/cant participate in.
Im merely judging you purely because you are judging me, the difference is you are doing it from a high horse/condesending/insulting view. Im judging you not on what you do/think but that you feel your view is higher than others.

zulutango

I'm tall enough, just over 6 foot, but I'd never have considered my height a huge advantage. I always thought I scored because the women were interested in the ****e that I talk about!

Kal El

The Talking Bread wrote: »

Well you are calling my views on this stoneage, I am not questioning promiscuity, one night stands etc . You brought it up initially. Sorry I replied!

I brought it up, someone agreed with me, then you have then brought it up twice since in a mocking tone.
Your view is stone-age because you dont understand how regularly it happens and that you can judge women purely because they can enjoy sex

Kal El

zulutango wrote: »

I'm tall enough, just over 6 foot, but I'd never have considered my height a huge advantage. I always thought I scored because the women were interested in the ****e that I talk about!

How do you feel now that you know the truth :pac:

The Talking Bread

Kal El wrote: »

I brought it up, someone agreed with me, then you have then brought it up twice since in a mocking tone.
Your view is stone-age because you dont understand how regularly it happens and that you can judge women purely because they can enjoy sex

FIN. (Have the last word if you wish!)

Outlaw Pete

I missed out in the whole Tinder thing. Too old to be dipping my toes in that particular pool I think.

On the whole women having some class thing, personally I have always adored women that don't take sex all that seriously and just see it as fun. I don't think I have ever, or could ever, look down on any woman, nor any man for that matter, that loved sex and enjoyed it as often as they could and with whomever they could. If that is.. they are single.

I think the only thing that makes me disgusted by someone with regards to how they conduct themselves sexually, is if they are dishonest. If they are seeing someone and they lie about that.. well that just creeps me out. In fact I remember one night meeting a gorgeous girl and at my place she said she was seeing someone and said: "fcuk him, he'd cheat on me if he could" and then laughed. Instant mood killer, and she could see it and said "Jesus, you'd swear I'd just told you I was a serial killer or something". She left around 15 minutes or so later, thank God. If they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.

Back in my 20's some mates of my brother's ran a telephone sex line and I did have free access to that for a few years and met some girls off it though. I liked that as your initial contact with them was personality based given that you knew nothing of what the other person looked like at all. In fact it wasn't until I would get along with someone on the phone that there would be talk of swapping photos or discussing meeting up etc. Now today it seems to be the opposite case and people know all about looks first, long before they know almost anything about the person's personality and indeed and are saying 'no thanks, next' quite often at that point too. For me that has to be a step backwards.

Kal El

The Talking Bread wrote: »

FIN. (Have the last word if you wish!)

If you feel Ive twisted your words I apologize, thats just how Ive been reading them, you did say you want nothing to do with a girl who goes to have sex with a guy shes never met and that its like free prostitution (unless that wasnt you, I cant actually remember)
Fin :pac:

Kal El

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

I missed out in the whole Tinder thing. Too old to be dipping my toes in that particular pool I think.

On the whole women having some class thing, personally I have always adored women that don't take sex all that seriously and just see it as fun. I don't think I have ever, or could ever, look down on any woman, nor any man for that matter, that loved sex and enjoyed it as often as they could and with whomever they could. If that is, that they are single...

I think the only thing that makes me disgusted by someone with regards to how they conduct themselves sexually, is if they are dishonest. If they are seeing someone and they lie about that.. well that just creeps me out. In fact I remember one night meeting a gorgeous girl and at my place she said she was seeing someone but "fcuk him, he'd cheat on me if he could" and then 'aughed. Instant mood killer and she could see it and said "Jesus, you'd swear I'd just told you I was a serial killer or something". She left around 15 minutes or so later, thank God. If they chat with you, they'll cheat on you.

I really really and for emphasis really :pac: agree with you on cheating. I hate it and never could understand it. I never had a girlfriend till I met my wife, never wanted one tbh. If I wasnt interested in a girl I didnt understand that point in going out with her just for the sake of it, which so many lads do just so they have a partner and then cheat on them if they get a chance :mad:. I cut friends of who do this tbh, if you want to sleep with other women, just break up with your partner, its not that hard ffs.

Surreptitious

Sure there's loads of people cheating and not a bother on them, they even boast about it. I've seen married women sucking the faces off men. It' a very low thing to do.

LLMMLL

[Deleted User] wrote: »

but those same women are disgusted at me for noticing this and not being happy about the situation".

So you're somehow displaying to women who reject you that you're unhappy with the rejection and they're reacting with disgust to that? All sounds a bit strange.

The reason people say height doesn't matter is because we all know a short guy (or multiple short guys) who do well with women.

Are you upset that fewer women are into you or that no women are into you. Because if no women are into you then the problem is not your height.

Jimmy Garlic

Is the bearded lumberjack phase over now? A lot of women seemed to be going for that type the last time I was free and single.

Knex*

Salrub wrote: »

At least I have a couple of inches on him!! Haha. Seriously though it's just when I'm out in a bar or whatever, I have it in my head that women prefer a man to be a good bit taller than them and makes me feel kinda intimidated to go and chat up women when most men around me are taller than me but that's a mindset I hope to change soon

Would you ever just make a joke about your height, or a lighthearted reference/acknowledgement, when first talking to a woman in a bar? It seems you have this built up in your head, and usually a good way of breaking those barriers, even with yourself, is humour.

You'll instantly be addressing the elephant in the room so to speak, and you can relax a bit and be more of yourself from there. Instead of dreading that they mention it, or fearing they'll be put off by your height, you're pretty much hurdling that mental blockade for yourself from the off.

LLMMLL

LLMMLL wrote: »

Are you upset that fewer women are into you or that no women are into you. Because if no women are into you then the problem is not your height.

It just seems that most women on here seem to say "oh *lots* of girls have no problem with a guys height .. but personally *I* would only be interested in taller men" .. if you had 33% coming on saying they were into tall men, %33 into average height men and %33 into short men I would have no issue with my height, obviously.. but when it's nearly zero % into short men even a short man with otherwise good attributes is going to feel defeated from the get go

SarahMollie

Deleted User wrote: »

It just seems that most women on here seem to say "oh *lots* of girls have no problem with a guys height .. but personally *I* would only be interested in taller men" .. if you had 33% coming on saying they were into tall men, %33 into average height men and %33 into short men I would have no issue with my height, obviously.. but when it's nearly zero % into short men even a short man with otherwise good attributes is going to feel defeated from the get go

I really think you're taking things that woman say to be absolute when they're probably not. Someone a few pages back (I think it was Beks101 but apologies if not) mentioned the concept of the "total package" and this is what women really want, past the age of 25 at least. Now that package will be different for everyone, but very few people are so one dimensional that they will decide on one characteristic, ie height.

The total package can be made up of many things - looks, sure but also sense of humour, similar outlook on life, similar interests in maybe sport or travel, similar religious beliefs, ambition and career aspirations, family values..... etc etc.

Also, how old are you Onion? If you're on the younger end of the scale then I wouldnt worry. Things that I thought were absolute no-no's back when I was in my late teens or early twenties wouldnt feature in my decision making process now (30). I remember myself and my friends (rather childishly) having a no gingers policy. My Fiance has red hair, but he's my absolute match in terms of all the other factors I listed above. We all grow up and lean whats important and whats not.

Triceratops Ballet

SarahMollie wrote: »

I really think you're taking things that woman say to be absolute when they're probably not. Someone a few pages back (I think it was Beks101 but apologies if not) mentioned the concept of the "total package" and this is what women really want, past the age of 25 at least. Now that package will be different for everyone, but very few people are so one dimensional that they will decide on one characteristic, ie height.

The total package can be made up of many things - looks, sure but also sense of humour, similar outlook on life, similar interests in maybe sport or travel, similar religious beliefs, ambition and career aspirations, family values..... etc etc.

Also, how old are you Onion? If you're on the younger end of the scale then I wouldnt worry. Things that I thought were absolute no-no's back when I was in my late teens or early twenties wouldnt feature in my decision making process now (30). I remember myself and my friends (rather childishly) having a no gingers policy. My Fiance has red hair, but he's my absolute match in terms of all the other factors I listed above. We all grow up and lean whats important and whats not.

This is really accurate, like if I had to make a list of attributes I want in a partner as if I were ordering from a manufacturer, sure they'd be all those absolutes like tall, dark handsome, blah blah blah. In reality non of those are dealbreakers. I only have one deal breaker and that's smoking, everything else is up for negotiation. I am one of those women who personally prefers tall men, mostly because I'm 5'9 myself but I've dated guys all the way from 5'9 to 6'7. I can't say for definite if I would or wouldn't date a guy shorter than me, I seem to just know a lot of tall men, but My aunt who's 6' is married to a guy who's 5'6 so maybe while outside the norm, it happens

If someone is sound and you click, the superficial things (like being in the top 10%) that the pua guys seem so focused on don't actually matter at all. In fact the top 10% is such a ridiculous and bizzare notion, like what is the scale who makes the decision if you're in the top 10%? is there a book somewhere that has pictures of every human on the planet ranked in order of attractiveness? it's weird!

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

professore

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

I missed out in the whole Tinder thing. Too old to be dipping my toes in that particular pool I think.

On the whole women having some class thing, personally I have always adored women that don't take sex all that seriously and just see it as fun. I don't think I have ever, or could ever, look down on any woman, nor any man for that matter, that loved sex and enjoyed it as often as they could and with whomever they could. If that is.. they are single.

I think the only thing that makes me disgusted by someone with regards to how they conduct themselves sexually, is if they are dishonest. If they are seeing someone and they lie about that.. well that just creeps me out. In fact I remember one night meeting a gorgeous girl and at my place she said she was seeing someone and said: "fcuk him, he'd cheat on me if he could" and then laughed. Instant mood killer, and she could see it and said "Jesus, you'd swear I'd just told you I was a serial killer or something". She left around 15 minutes or so later, thank God. If they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.

Back in my 20's some mates of my brother's ran a telephone sex line and I did have free access to that for a few years and met some girls off it though. I liked that as your initial contact with them was personality based given that you knew nothing of what the other person looked like at all. In fact it wasn't until I would get along with someone on the phone that there would be talk of swapping photos or discussing meeting up etc. Now today it seems to be the opposite case and people know all about looks first, long before they know almost anything about the person's personality and indeed and are saying 'no thanks, next' quite often at that point too. For me that has to be a step backwards.

Agree 1000%. What especially boils my blood is people who say they are "sex positive" and "my body is my own" - mostly women - which translates as "I'll shag anything that moves regardless what my partner or spouse thinks or feels about it". Men do this too, but they don't generally make up such bull**** excuses about it. More "my wife doesn't understand me" and "we've grown apart" kind of thing. They don't use some false sense of equality to back up their bad behaviour.

professore

Kal El wrote: »

I really really and for emphasis really :pac: agree with you on cheating. I hate it and never could understand it. I never had a girlfriend till I met my wife, never wanted one tbh. If I wasnt interested in a girl I didnt understand that point in going out with her just for the sake of it, which so many lads do just so they have a partner and then cheat on them if they get a chance :mad:. I cut friends of who do this tbh, if you want to sleep with other women, just break up with your partner, its not that hard ffs.

I did the going out for the sake of it thing, but I didn't cheat ... I just broke up with them first.

professore

Permabear wrote: »

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I doubt there are any women out there swiping right on every guy on Tinder. So no, they wouldn't experience rejection in the same way some guys do.