Asking a girl out

StupidLikeAFox

Bear in mind that if you are not friends on fb the message may not be seen. I'd add her first, if she is interested in you she won't mind

Widdershins

Hi Op, I'm female and I think your message seems fine. Simple and straightforward and clear.

Goya

I'd get her number before letting her know that you searched for her on Facebook.

KERSPLAT!

Flimpson wrote: »

I'd get her number before letting her know that you searched for her on Facebook.

You make it sound creepy, it's a 2 second search of someones name. Everyone is on FB these days, if you want to find someone, go there.

I was going to suggest a FB message before adding her but I know that it doesn't deliver to their inbox unless you're friends.

Add her, if she accepts then ask her out on a date.

exaisle

johnyy92 wrote: »

<SNIP> I was just wondering if you would be interested in going for dinner and a few drinks some night when your around ?

"...when you're around. "

If you're going to ask her out, at least make sure you're spelling the invitation correctly....

DanWall

Ted111 wrote: »

can you put up a sketch map of her house and garden. mark out
positioning of bins and trees etc...

Pluggy sounds good

Glenster

"Dear female acquaintance,

It is the human male who previously conversed with you,

I would like to be near you and partake in activities at some point in the future. Do you consent?

Kind thoughts,

Definitely not a murderer

PS. Please disregard the inactivity on my facebook, I am laying low."

Maximus Alexander

You should say:

"Hi there,

It was so good to see you the other night. I've thought about you often over the last few years and how it was such a shame that we lost touch. Chatting to you has rekindled and old passion that I haven't really felt since we last met. In the intervening time I have dated other girls, but it always fizzled out as we seemed to be missing that special spark. That was sort of a fire based analogy, hope you liked it.

I feel that spark with you. You were a breath of fresh air in an otherwise dull and uninspiring evening. Our lives are like a song and I think that we could make beautiful music together. Would you like to meet up for a drink sometime? I believe in seizing the day so sooner would be better than later; how about tonight? If you're not available tonight, perhaps tomorrow or Thursday? Friday will work for me too.

Oh, and just to avoid any potential creepiness, I'd just like to clarify that I haven't been using Facebook for a few years and reactivated it in order to get in touch with you. I just didn't want you to look at my sparse profile and get the wrong idea, like that I had just been using it to creep on people or whatever. Although on an unrelated note you looked really great in the pink dress you wore to your ex-boyfriend's birthday back in August last year.

Anyway, I'm really looking forward to seeing you again sweetheart!

Chat soon. xx"

dar100

How is she much older than you now!! Was she not much older last time you seen her

jamesbere

Dear member of the opposite sex

I'm a male of breeding age looking for companionship.

Father Hernandez

Also, don't forget to let us know how you get on if you do message her !

Kimbot

KERSPLAT! wrote: »

You make it sound creepy, it's a 2 second search of someones name. Everyone is on FB these days, if you want to find someone, go there.

I was going to suggest a FB message before adding her but I know that it doesn't deliver to their inbox unless you're friends.

Add her, if she accepts then ask her out on a date.

FB now sends you a message asking you to accept the message if you are not already friends

SteM

Stakeout her office to try and meet her, I think she works for Sagman, Bennett, Robbins, Oppenheim and Taft.

Peregrine

jonnycivic wrote: »

FB now sends you a message asking you to accept the message if you are not already friends

Yeah, you get a "message request" on Messenger now. Not sure about the webpage. It's still a bit odd. I don't think I got a notification about them, they just popped up on screen.

Just add her. You knew her years ago, you've got mutual friends and you were talking recently. I don't get what the problem with adding her on facebook is.

And definitely don't get her phone number from friends to call her. That's creepy.

Kimbot

Peregrine wrote: »

Yeah, you get a "message request" on Messenger now. Not sure about the webpage. It's still a bit odd. I don't think I got a notification about them, they just popped up on screen.

Just add her. You knew her years ago, you've got mutual friends and you were talking recently. I don't get what the problem with adding her on facebook is.

Yeah, I got a notification on the main site and also thru the app too.

Winterlong

Yup, just add her. If she ignores your friend request then so be it.
If she accepts then PM her and see how it goes from there.

Good luck Op. Let us know how you get on.

kfallon

Candie wrote: »

Wot he sez.

Also, say nuthin' about facebook and don't add her first.

And mind your punctuation in the message, little things can put people off at first.

So no dick pic OP..... :P

Potential Underachiever

Even by adding her on FB days after meeting is pretty much saying you're interested OP, do it, ask her, what's the worst that can happen?

Sam Kade

StupidLikeAFox wrote: »

Bear in mind that if you are not friends on fb the message may not be seen. I'd add her first, if she is interested in you she won't mind

He'll have to find her Facebook page first, he's surely a troll bored after Christmas.

hairyprincess

jamesbere wrote: »

Dear member of the opposite sex

I'm a male of breeding age looking for companionship.

Have you road frontage?

Hercule Poirot

The only obvious option is to hire a PI to follow her for a few weeks until you can identify regular occurrences in her schedule, e.g., she may eat at the same place for lunch every Tuesday. Once identified you can be there to "bump into her" and tell her how much you love the smell of her hair after she showers and that the Pantene Pro-V is doing wonders for her natural shine. This is how normal, 21st Century people go about these things and she in turn will appreciate the effort you have made to get to know her routine - good luck.

TerrorFirmer

I can't believe people suggested sending a message on Facebook was creepy and in the same sentence advised him to get her number from her friends and just cold-call her? That's infinitely more awkward.

johnnyskeleton

1. Become a mysterious billionaire con man.

2. Throw lavish houseparties during the Long Island summer season.

3. Invite everyone she knows and extend an open invitation to them.

4. Get surly each time she doesnt come so befriend her cousin.

5. Eventually she comes to the party.

6. [Details are sketchy]

7. Happy ending.

arayess

Atari Jaguar wrote: »

So it's not creepy to get a persons number from someone and ring them up out of the blue? Jaysus.

no it's not , it's a very reasonable thing.

got your number from x (added to the message) sorts that out

I'm interested to know why it would be creepy to ask soembody for somebody elses number?

jmayo

dar100 wrote: »

How is she much older than you now!! Was she not much older last time you seen her

She hasn't aged well ?

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

1. Become a mysterious billionaire con man.

2. Throw lavish houseparties during the Long Island summer season.

3. Invite everyone she knows and extend an open invitation to them.

4. Get surly each time she doesnt come so befriend her cousin.

5. Eventually she comes to the party.

6. [Details are sketchy]

7. Happy ending.

Is that not most of Donald Trump's bio ?

circadian

Ask her if she likes to watch Netflix and chill. It's all the rage these days I hear.

tigger123

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

1. Become a mysterious billionaire con man.

2. Throw lavish houseparties during the Long Island summer season.

3. Invite everyone she knows and extend an open invitation to them.

4. Get surly each time she doesnt come so befriend her cousin.

5. Eventually she comes to the party.

6. [Details are sketchy]

7. Happy ending.

Not sure if there would be much of a happy ending there.

Hercule Poirot

arayess wrote: »

I'm interested to know why it would be creepy to ask somebody for somebody elses number?

OK then, can I have your sister's phone number please?

corner of hells

Get her name tattoed on your neck, send pic to her.

If that doesn't work , get into her bathroom and wait in her shower overnight.

She'll be pleasantly surprised.

_Whimsical_

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

Too long winded.

"Hey x, great seeing you again the other night. Do you fancy going for drinks sometime?

Cheers,
Johnny "

Go with this,exactly this!
Be casual, you're risking coming across intimidatingly intense right now, no one wants an interview for the position of your future wife. Girls are well used to men coming on too strong and generally it's unsettling, even if you like them. See how she responds to the above and then if she agrees see where she's at with it all before you start revealing you're seriously invested in the idea of you two. If she says no to this she really wouldn't have said yes to a more forward approach.

carrieb

As a girl I'd say definitely don't put in the bit about deactivating the account etc. It does sound a bit creepy!
You don't need to explain the state of your account to anyone! I barely use FB except for private messages and groups so my page is very empty, none of anybody's business! Many people are the same.
I'd be very short and sweet.
"It was great to see you the other night. Just wondering if you'd like to go out for a drink sometime?" Don't say much more then that. I'd cut straight to the chase. At least she can say yes or no straight away without dragging it into a long chat and you not knowing if she's being polite or is actually interested. Go for it.

carrieb

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

That might put a mutual friend in an awkward position though. I always hated if someone asked me for someone else's number. You'd have to check with the person and then it becomes a big thing. I never really like a friend asking me "is it ok if I give X your number" either... FB message is far more simple and easily forgotten/brushed over. A phone call could be very awkward too!

wherearemykeys

carrieb wrote: »

As a girl I'd say definitely don't put in the bit about deactivating the account etc. It does sound a bit creepy!
You don't need to explain the state of your account to anyone! I barely use FB except for private messages and groups so my page is very empty, none of anybody's business! Many people are the same.
I'd be very short and sweet.
"It was great to see you the other night. Just wondering if you'd like to go out for a drink sometime?" Don't say much more then that. I'd cut straight to the chase. At least she can say yes or no straight away without dragging it into a long chat and you not knowing if she's being polite or is actually interested. Go for it.

This - agree. Straight to the point.
I have all the privacy settings on my Facebook page so my page always looks blank if you're not a friend.

Maximus Alexander

Also tell her you think she might be your one true love.

Goya

KERSPLAT! wrote: »

You make it sound creepy, it's a 2 second search of someones name. Everyone is on FB these days, if you want to find someone, go there.

I was going to suggest a FB message before adding her but I know that it doesn't deliver to their inbox unless you're friends.

Add her, if she accepts then ask her out on a date.

Oh I don't think it's remotely creepy - and by jiminy would I have an auld stalk myself! But you know the way some people can be funny about what they perceive as stalking.

The Princess Bride

This thread reminds me of Ciara and our Bryan.
I wonder whether they're still together?

mansize

The Princess Bride wrote: »

This thread reminds me of Ciara and our Bryan.
I wonder whether they're still together?

Fake friends thread was fake

Lt Dan

Tell her that you want to fit inside her like a warm kitten


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8wrJZa4ICg

arayess

Hercule Poirot wrote: »

OK then, can I have your sister's phone number please?

, I don't know you .
He has friends in common is it's not a complete random ask and your request isn't the same thing

Radiosonde

arayess wrote: »

, I don't know you .
He has friends in common is it's not a complete random ask and your request isn't the same thing

He's a fictional Belgian detective. Smooth accent; small, tidy moustache. Your sister could do worse.

Valentina

jamesbere wrote: »

Dear member of the opposite sex

I'm a male of breeding age looking for companionship.

PM sent

lookinghere

johnyy92 wrote: »

Hi i just have a quick question. I met this girl one night over the Christmas which i have not seen in years. She is a few years older than me and we were talking for a good half hour. Anyway over that time i got the vibe that she was scoping me out and was possibly interested. I was going to ask her out but between mutual friends moving around we got separated. I rarely see this girl and I dont have her number. I was just wondering if i asked her out over facebook would that be acceptable. Also i deactivated my Facebook account three years ago so i would only be signing in to send her a message.

I have this message in mind

Hi (Name), (Name) here, I was talking to you there the other night. I deactivated this account years ago and I only signed in to talk to you as I may not run into you again. I was just wondering if you would be interested in going for dinner and a few drinks some night when your around ?. I would have asked you the other night but it didn’t seem appropriate at the time. Sure let me know what you think anyway.

Any input into my approach would be much appreciated and a girls opinion on her point of view.

Just do it. Worse can happen ? She say no move on then

oakshade

Any update OP?

Hammer89

oakshade wrote: »

Any update OP?

Johnny here off my other account.

Yeah, I messaged her on Facebook but now I'm not allowed within 500 feet of her. She's just playing hard to get, such a tease like, but my binoculars have a scope of 550 feet so the joke is on her lmao.

johnyy92

I have her asked. I am just waiting for a response. Did not mention deactivating account and I did not add her.

Barry Badrinath

johnyy92 wrote: »

I have her asked. I am just waiting for a response. Did not mention deactivating account and I did not add her.

Did she reply yet?

Barry Badrinath

What about now?

Barry Badrinath

Now?

Barry Badrinath

Aw tough break dude

Miss Demeanour

You mentioned the deactivating didn't ya?