About to miss first mortgage payment in 19 years

eeguy

CramCycle wrote: »

No need for installments unless it is a private college in which case give them a call. They will have their student cards for the year. Just make sure it is paid by exam results time or before next year. Don't get me wrong, it's not my first option but given the situation.

Don't pay the college unless they're shouting for it.
You can get away without paying that till June. The kids can get their results straight from the lecturer if the college doesn't put them online.

So now you're more than halfway there to mortgage freedom

newdigi

OP how much is owed on the 17th?

Mrs OBumble

Sounds like the kids need a giant kick up the backside. Why arent they paying their own college fees?

eeguy

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Sounds like the kids need a giant kick up the backside. Why arent they paying their own college fees?

Not many 17 or 18 year olds would have 3k+ a year in fees plus living expenses. No one in my family ever has at any rate.

jimmycrackcorm

chisel1 wrote:

Business van is for sale. The most it will release is 2k, Wont help this month though.

Is this wise? It'll release cash but what will he do to earn income later?

nostro

To be frank I think people are getting way to worked about this. There is no possibility that a bank would take legal action with such a small amount owed. Maybe after a few years of no engagement and no payments but even then it is unlikely. He should just stop payments if he can't pay now and then pay it off when he has the money to spare or is back on his feet. Sure his ICB report will be affected for a while but should he really be borrowing more money anyway. If he is not applying for more loans then ICB report doesn't matter.

Avatar MIA

jd wrote: »

I wouldn't worry about been 2 weeks later like that. The question would be how will he pay the following months

Not gospel, but as long as paid within the month my understanding is that it wont count as a missed payment and be reported to the ICB.

newacc2015

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Sounds like the kids need a giant kick up the backside. Why arent they paying their own college fees?

You say this everytime someone mentions their children in College dont contribute to the household, yet you never know the persons circumstances... Or even seem to value the importance of education.

You are always very quick to attack the children lack of work ethic. These children might have 40 hours of lectures a week and maybe another 20-30 hours of study, yet you think they are lazy?

What if OP's children are studying medicine where they no time to relax never mind find a job. Do they still need a giant kick up the backside? The fact is OPs childrens only priority in College should be to get a 2.1 or a first, otherwise their 4 years in College was a total waste of time.

There is no point in OPs children messing up their final grade which will affect their career for life to pay their parent mortgage.

I see no mention of the wife of the household working. Is it grand for the women of the house not to be in paid employment, but totally unacceptable for the children studying 60 hours a week?

Mrs OBumble

Dad's had a heart attack, could not keep his business going - and still expected to support Snowflake through college? Not in my world.

Let Snowflake go part time, or even defer their studies for a couple of years, get a job and support the family in the meantime while the parents need it.

And 40 hours of lectures a week. From 9am - 5pm solid every day? Yeah, right, that happens.

I would assume that the wife's job is what is putting food on the table and the lights on. If not, then they'd have been in trouble long before now.

eeguy

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Dad's had a heart attack, could not keep his business going - and still expected to support Snowflake through college? Not in my world.

Let Snowflake go part time, or even defer their studies for a couple of years, get a job and support the family in the meantime while the parents need it.

And 40 hours of lectures a week. From 9am - 5pm solid every day? Yeah, right, that happens.

I would assume that the wife's job is what is putting food on the table and the lights on. If not, then they'd have been in trouble long before now.

I think you have very entrenched views and are not willing to accept another point of view.
I disagree with all your points.

DesperateDan

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Let Snowflake go part time, or even defer their studies for a couple of years, get a job and support the family in the meantime while the parents need it

That's equivalent to getting in to debt for two years and ensuring the kids finish college. Except they'll have meaningful finances coming in and everyone will be significantly better off.

Your proposal is 'everyone struggle for 4 years until the kids have deferred, helped with debts and are out of college' vs 'everyone struggle for 2 years until the kids are out of college and have prospects'.

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

And 40 hours of lectures a week. From 9am - 5pm solid every day? Yeah, right, that happens..

I went to college from 07-12 and worked every weekend and holiday for those 5 years. Roughly 20 hours a week. During those years I had no college fees due to means testing and received the full maintenance grant (both of which have been cut significantly today).

I was careful with money but did not have a spare euro to hand over to my parents during that time, so certainly in my case a full-time college kid cannot also help with the upkeep of the house, unless they are living with their parents.

We had over 30 hours of lectures a week spread across the day from 9-5

newacc2015

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Dad's had a heart attack, could not keep his business going - and still expected to support Snowflake through college? Not in my world.

You do you, most people will totally disagree with that opinion though

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Let Snowflake go part time, or even defer their studies for a couple of years, get a job and support the family in the meantime while the parents need it.

The fact you are calling them snowflake is so condescending and belittling. These children are going to have to drop out of College because their parents didn't manage their financial resource properly is ridiculous.

So OPs children should drop out of college to work a minimum wage job at around €17k per year when if they finished college they would probably be making around €28-40k per year. OPs priority should be to get this children through College and get them into highly paid employment

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

And 40 hours of lectures a week. From 9am - 5pm solid every day? Yeah, right, that happens.

When was the last time you were in College? Because a lot of degrees are in fact 40 hours. Medicine, Engineering, Psychotherapy, Nursing if they are on placement, some of the science ones are about 30 hours a week when you have a ton of labs.

You seem quite of touch with College in 2017

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

I would assume that the wife's job is what is putting food on the table and the lights on. If not, then they'd have been in trouble long before now

So you are making assumptions of that wife is hard working straight off the beat, but the children are all lazy... That is a serious double standard, which you don't seem to be bothered with. It is possible that the wife is doing nothing and not in employment if they can't make any mortgage payment

Nervous Wreck

chisel1 wrote: »

I have arranged to pay this month for him. But not till about the 27th, passed the due date of 17th.

FYI, the payment isn't "missed" until it's over 30 days late so this instance will not affect ICB.

murphaph

eeguy wrote: »

Not many 17 or 18 year olds would have 3k+ a year in fees plus living expenses. No one in my family ever has at any rate.

The kids might have to look at the bigger picture for a while. Their old man has just had a heart attack. A year out from college, working to clear their father's debts and get him mortgage free so he can go on disability and recover without the stress bringing on another, possibly fatal heart attack.

El Tarangu

Op - sorry to hear about your friend.

Any possibility that he could take in a lodger? Tax free up to 10 or 12k AFAIR - it would only need to be for a few months.

Mrs OBumble

newacc2015 wrote: »

The fact you are calling them snowflake is so condescending and belittling. These children are going to have to drop out of College because their parents didn't manage their financial resource properly is ridiculous.

So OPs children should drop out of college to work a minimum wage job at around €17k per year when if they finished college they would probably be making around €28-40k per year. OPs priority should be to get this children through College and get them into highly paid employment

.....

So you are making assumptions of that wife is hard working straight off the beat, but the children are all lazy... That is a serious double standard, which you don't seem to be bothered with. It is possible that the wife is doing nothing and not in employment if they can't make any mortgage payment

Nope. The kids may be being selfish, valuing their own education (which they can continue later) over their parents health. We don't teally have enough information to know if this is true or noy - but the whole point of a discussion forum is to talk about alternatives like this.

No one is entitled to have the bank of mammy and daddy support them once they've reached 18.

padd b1975

Arrange meetings ASAP with all creditors in order of importance and explain the situation informing them that you'll be engaging with MABS as a matter of necessity -mortgage lender first obviously, credit card is unsecured debt so they're least important. Don't fall into the trap of making promises to pay that you can't keep.

Make an appointment with MABS and be totally honest with them also, they will engage on your friends behalf.

Best of luck.

cruizer101

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Dad's had a heart attack, could not keep his business going - and still expected to support Snowflake through college? Not in my world.

How do you know the kids aren't already working, also do you really think calling them Snowflake when you know nothing of their circumstances adds any strength to the argument.

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

And 40 hours of lectures a week. From 9am - 5pm solid every day? Yeah, right, that happens.

Yes it does happen, in first year engineering I had 9-6 3 days a week, 10-6 1 day and 9-5 one day, 1 hr lunch each day, plus easily another days work outside that. Possibly enough free time to hold down job which would fund travel and general college expenses but nowhere near enough to pay fee and a mortgage on top

BoatMad

Avatar MIA wrote: »

Not gospel, but as long as paid within the month my understanding is that it wont count as a missed payment and be reported to the ICB.

you are only in arrears after 90 days , only then is there a risk of ICB

nor would I worry too much about that , he has far bigger things to worry about

the key is to engage with the lenders , whatever he does , dont just avoid communication

Kalimah

cruizer101 wrote: »

How do you know the kids aren't already working, also do you really think calling them Snowflake when you know nothing of their circumstances adds any strength to the argument.


Yes it does happen, in first year engineering I had 9-6 3 days a week, 10-6 1 day and 9-5 one day, 1 hr lunch each day, plus easily another days work outside that. Possibly enough free time to hold down job which would fund travel and general college expenses but nowhere near enough to pay fee and a mortgage on top

I'd concur with this. My own son had exactly the same hours in his engineering course. He did a bit of part time work throughout his college years but it was really only during the summer, and then only one of the summers. There was very little work for students from 2008.
I'd have cut off my right hand sooner than see any of mine drop out due to money worries.

Elemonator

thierry14 wrote: »

Poor guy

19 years of ploughing away and right at end gets in trouble

You should set up a fundraising account OP

Let us know when setup and I will donate 10e

That's a good idea. Kickstarter, GoFundMe, Razoo, IndieGogo are places to start.

Elemonator

cruizer101 wrote: »

How do you know the kids aren't already working, also do you really think calling them Snowflake when you know nothing of their circumstances adds any strength to the argument.


Yes it does happen, in first year engineering I had 9-6 3 days a week, 10-6 1 day and 9-5 one day, 1 hr lunch each day, plus easily another days work outside that. Possibly enough free time to hold down job which would fund travel and general college expenses but nowhere near enough to pay fee and a mortgage on top

Agreed you can have those types of hours. I enrolled myself in law and even though I had only 14 lectures a week, the amount of study in between reading and assignments was phenomenal. You also have gaps in between lectures. I could easily have pulled 9-6 everyday and then the 90 minute commute home.

chisel1

Three of the kids have part time jobs funding college. The fourth in in secondary.
The car was sold on Saturday, thats paid this months mortgage. 5 months to go. Paid 500 off credit card bill (1700). yesterday. Getting a loan of 5k at month end for 6 months (12.9%), this will pay the college fee and part of the tax bill.

Bits of work coming in (all invoiced) if they get paid in Feb, that mortgage should be paid, then down to 4 months........

chisel1

newdigi wrote: »

OP how much is owed on the 17th?

1300. Its sorted for this month

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Sounds like the kids need a giant kick up the backside. Why arent they paying their own college fees?

Let me clarify, The "kids" more than pay their way. The fees that are due are for the sons Masters. He got a college loan for the full amount and has a part time job to pay back the loan. The college fees were due in twi tranches. The first one was paid when due, the second payment is due on the 29th. He "loaned" his mother the second payment in October to pay other household bills. Its this bit that has to be paid back now.

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Dad's had a heart attack, could not keep his business going - and still expected to support Snowflake through college? Not in my world.

Let Snowflake go part time, or even defer their studies for a couple of years, get a job and support the family in the meantime while the parents need it.

And 40 hours of lectures a week. From 9am - 5pm solid every day? Yeah, right, that happens.

I would assume that the wife's job is what is putting food on the table and the lights on. If not, then they'd have been in trouble long before now.

Thats very helpful.


The debts are not insurmountable. Its just that he does not want his ICB rating damaged. There could be a broken engine, hospital bills, leaky roof etc etc and if you cant go to the credit union or bank, your screwed.

newacc2015

chisel1 wrote: »

Three of the kids have part time jobs funding college. The fourth in in secondary.
The car was sold on Saturday, thats paid this months mortgage. 5 months to go. Paid 500 off credit card bill (1700). yesterday. Getting a loan of 5k at month end for 6 months (12.9%), this will pay the college fee and part of the tax bill.

The children if they go to their College bank ie the AIB or BOI on campus, there is usually special rates for students to pay their fees.

newacc2015

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Nope. The kids may be being selfish, valuing their own education (which they can continue later) over their parents health. We don't teally have enough information to know if this is true or noy - but the whole point of a discussion forum is to talk about alternatives like this.

You are not treating the children like they are an individual, you are seeing them as a burden or a figure on the current account. The fact is the worst that would happen to OP's friend is that they would end up with a few marks on their ICB. That isnt really an issue when they dont need a mortgage in a few years and the credit report is clear within 5 years.

Expecting children to drop out of college is selfish of the parents. Their children are going to lose out on potential future earnings, they might not go back to college, it will be awkward to explain why they took 5/6 years to complete a 4 year degree etc.

A few marks on your ICB is better than potentially messing up your childrens future.

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

No one is entitled to have the bank of mammy and daddy support them once they've reached 18.

But once the children reach 18 they should have to support their parents? To the extent they should drop out of college and fund their parents lifestyle? IMO that is super contradionary. It might be acceptable in somewhere like rural China but not in 2017 Ireland. You can't expect your children to support themselves and then expect them to support you if you are poor at financial planning.

In America and Germany, it is expected that parents save for college when they have a baby so when the child goes to college in 18 years the money is there. If you dont think you should have to support your children in college, I think many people would argue your child is not going to reach its full potential if it working to fund its everyday expenses at the expense of study.

newacc2015

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Nope. The kids may be being selfish, valuing their own education (which they can continue later) over their parents health. We don't teally have enough information to know if this is true or noy - but the whole point of a discussion forum is to talk about alternatives like this.

You are not treating the children like they are an individual, you are seeing them as a burden or a figure on the current account. The fact is the worst that would happen to OP's friend is that they would end up with a few marks on their ICB. That isnt really an issue when they dont need a mortgage in a few years and the credit report is clear within 5 years.

Expecting children to drop out of college is selfish of the parents. Their children are going to lose out on potential future earnings, they might not go back to college, it will be awkward to explain why they took 5/6 years to complete a 4 year degree etc.

A few marks on your ICB is better than potentially messing up your childrens future.

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

No one is entitled to have the bank of mammy and daddy support them once they've reached 18.

But once the children reach 18 they should have to support their parents? To the extent they should drop out of college and fund their parents lifestyle? IMO that is super contradionary. It might be acceptable in somewhere like rural China but not in 2017 Ireland. You can't expect your children to support themselves and then expect them to support you if you are poor at financial planning.

In America and Germany, it is expected that parents save for college when they have a baby so when the child goes to college in 18 years the money is there. If you dont think you should have to support your children in college, I think many people would argue your child is not going to reach its full potential if it working to fund its everyday expenses at the expense of study.

In this discussion you have basically ignored the fact working heavily through College comes at the expense of future earnings

CramCycle

chisel1 wrote: »

Three of the kids have part time jobs funding college. The fourth in in secondary.
The car was sold on Saturday, thats paid this months mortgage. 5 months to go. Paid 500 off credit card bill (1700). yesterday. Getting a loan of 5k at month end for 6 months (12.9%), this will pay the college fee and part of the tax bill.

Could the kids get a loan instead (lower interest rate) and he pays them back. Use this to cover the mortgage and clear the CC. Don't pay the college fees right now until more stable would be my opinion, swallow his pride and say to the son that the college will be fine for a bit longer.

tracey turnblad

The only thing is they may be fined for late fees.

forumuser

chisel1 wrote: »

Three of the kids have part time jobs funding college. The fourth in in secondary.
The car was sold on Saturday, thats paid this months mortgage. 5 months to go. Paid 500 off credit card bill (1700). yesterday. Getting a loan of 5k at month end for 6 months (12.9%), this will pay the college fee and part of the tax bill.

Bits of work coming in (all invoiced) if they get paid in Feb, that mortgage should be paid, then down to 4 months........

Would you not be better just paying the minimum on the credit card for now (I know there will be an interest hit) but it seems mad to prioritise the credit card over the tax bill or mortgage.