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I wonder if the roles were reversed...

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  • 03-02-2017 11:48am
    #1
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭


    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1

    Can't help but think that if I, a straight male, started a thread anywhere here about looking for accommodation, where I would never cross paths with members of the LGBT community?
    That there would be a full blown meltdown, thread locked and me banned.

    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.
    Post edited by Shield on


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    #2
    MrBlack93
    Registered Users Posts: 1,041 ✭✭✭MrBlack93


    Your post would be closed and you'd get berated for being a homophobe


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    #3
    hullaballoo
    Administrators, Entertainment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 18,726 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭hullaballoo


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1

    Can't help but think that if I, a straight male, started a thread anywhere here about looking for accommodation, where I would never cross paths with members of the LGBT community?
    That there would be a full blown meltdown, thread locked and me banned.

    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.

    For how much of your life have you been a target of ridicule, abuse or violence directly as a result of being a straight man?


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    #4
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭b_mac2


    hullaballoo wrote: »
    For how much of your life have you been a target of ridicule, abuse or violence directly as a result of being a straight man?



    Don't start with that shìte. I've never even so much as said a bad word to anyone, about their sexual prefrences.


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    #5
    Lovely Bloke
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,748 ✭✭✭✭Lovely Bloke


    Basically, it's ok to discriminate if the group you identify as being a part of has been discriminated against in the past.

    Am I along the right lines with that?


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    #6
    IITYWYBMAD
    Registered Users Posts: 1,035 ✭✭✭IITYWYBMAD


    hullaballoo wrote: »
    For how much of your life have you been a target of ridicule, abuse or violence directly as a result of being a straight man?

    Oh please.......

    I've plenty of straight and non-straight friends. I have a lesbian daughter. What you outline above is far from the default position. I know people who are bald or non-Caucasian who have had more abuse than I've seen with gay people.

    Some people are arseholes, welcome to Ireland.

    The OP asks a very legitimate question, and to try and hold up the lowest denominator as a retort is frankly weak. There's ridicule, violence and abuse all over the place. Sexuality is only one of the many many reasons.

    On the other hand, I've seen ream after ream of pleading for Gay, Bi and Trans people to be "accepted" into society and "normalised". Then I read the likes of the accommodation thread referenced, and my heart sinks.


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    #7
    OldGoat
    Registered Users Posts: 12,637 ✭✭✭✭OldGoat


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1

    Can't help but think that if I, a straight male, started a thread anywhere here about looking for accommodation, where I would never cross paths with members of the LGBT community?
    That there would be a full blown meltdown, thread locked and me banned.

    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.
    You've started a Feedback thread on a hypothetical situation. Until you actually post a similar thread and get subsequently banned for it then you are just spouting hot air.

    I'm older than Minecraft goats.



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    #8
    LLMMLL
    Registered Users Posts: 4,588 ✭✭✭LLMMLL


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1

    Can't help but think that if I, a straight male, started a thread anywhere here about looking for accommodation, where I would never cross paths with members of the LGBT community?
    That there would be a full blown meltdown, thread locked and me banned.

    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.

    Basically insults (whether intended to be insults or not) are worse when what's being insulted has led to traumatic experiences in the past. Example: growing up gay.


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    #9
    Tom Dunne
    Registered Users Posts: 23,212 ✭✭✭✭Tom Dunne


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1

    Can't help but think that if I, a straight male, started a thread anywhere here about looking for accommodation, where I would never cross paths with members of the LGBT community?
    That there would be a full blown meltdown, thread locked and me banned.

    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.
    MrBlack93 wrote: »
    Your post would be closed and you'd get berated for being a homophobe

    I have to be honest, you have a point. Both of you.


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    #10
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭b_mac2


    LLMMLL wrote: »
    Basically insults (whether intended to be insults or not) are worse when what's being insulted has led to traumatic experiences in the past. Example: growing up gay.

    Again, please don't generalise me with previous incidents you've had with straight males. I've never wronged anyone because of their sexual orientations.


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    #11
    LLMMLL
    Registered Users Posts: 4,588 ✭✭✭LLMMLL


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    Again, please don't generalise me with previous incidents you've had with straight males. I've never wronged anyone because of their sexual orientations.

    Being generalized about is not worthy of mod action though which is what this thread was about.


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    #12
    Sad Professor
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 22,678 CMod ✭✭✭✭Sad Professor


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1

    Can't help but think that if I, a straight male, started a thread anywhere here about looking for accommodation, where I would never cross paths with members of the LGBT community?
    That there would be a full blown meltdown, thread locked and me banned.

    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.

    I haven’t read the whole thread but in the first post they didn’t say anything about not wanting to come into contact with straight males. They just said they wanted a “queer friendly” house. So it would be more accurate to say that they don’t want to come into contact with a homophobe. They are new Ireland and not sure what the atmosphere towards LGBT people is like here.


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    #13
    MrBlack93
    Registered Users Posts: 1,041 ✭✭✭MrBlack93


    Sad Professor wrote: »
    I haven’t read the whole thread but in the first post they didn’t say anything about not wanting to come into contact with straight males. They just said they wanted a “queer friendly” house. So it would be more accurate to say that they don’t want to come into contact with a homophobe. They are new Ireland and not sure what the atmosphere towards LGBT people is like here.

    Nope they explicitly say they don't want any males in the house.


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    #14
    Lovely Bloke
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,748 ✭✭✭✭Lovely Bloke


    Sad Professor wrote: »
    I haven’t read the whole thread but...

    ...but you should read the whole thread before commenting, maybe.


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    #15
    Sad Professor
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 22,678 CMod ✭✭✭✭Sad Professor


    I read the post in which they say that now. They explain their reasoning pretty well. They aren’t discriminating against “straight males”, but for mental health related reasons they feel more comfortable living with other LGBT people. I don’t see the problem.


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    #16
    blackwhite
    Registered Users Posts: 8,817 ✭✭✭blackwhite


    Lovely Bloke wrote: »
    ...but you should read the whole thread before commenting, maybe.

    Take the comment about not being comfortable if a female housemate brought back a straight male boyfriend - then replace the words "straight male" with black, muslim, or any other minority you can think of.

    What's more shocking is that not only is this attitude deemed acceptable - the only mod actions on the thread are to sanction anyone who points out that this attitude is problematic.


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    #17
    Lovely Bloke
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,748 ✭✭✭✭Lovely Bloke


    blackwhite wrote: »
    Take the comment about not being comfortable if a female housemate brought back a straight male boyfriend - then replace the words "straight male" with black, muslim, or any other minority you can think of.

    What's more shocking is that not only is this attitude deemed acceptable - the only mod actions on the thread are to sanction anyone who points out that this attitude is problematic.

    yes, I have no idea why you are quoting me, but I agree with the premise of this thread.


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    #18
    blackwhite
    Registered Users Posts: 8,817 ✭✭✭blackwhite


    Lovely Bloke wrote: »
    yes, I have no idea why you are quoting me, but I agree with the premise of this thread.

    Clearly hit the wrong post to quote!


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    #19
    D0NNELLY
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,387 ✭✭✭D0NNELLY


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057698370/1
    Why the blatant double standards here? I mean, the OP in that thread came out straight and said that they don't feel comfortable about the possibility of coming in to contact with a straight male.

    Probably down to compassion for the life he's lived to have to put that in an add.


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    #20
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭b_mac2


    D0NNELLY wrote: »
    Probably down to compassion for the life he's lived to have to put that in an add.

    Go back and actually read the thread, the OP was a woman.


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    #21
    D0NNELLY
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,387 ✭✭✭D0NNELLY


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    Go back and actually read the thread, the OP was a woman.

    take it easy, it was a typo.


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    #22
    D0NNELLY
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,387 ✭✭✭D0NNELLY


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    Go back and actually read the thread, the OP was a woman.

    Probably down to compassion for the life she's lived to have to put that in an add.


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    #23
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭b_mac2


    D0NNELLY wrote: »
    Probably down to compassion for the life she's lived to have to put that in an add.

    *House wanted* Preferably somewhere there won't be any refugees housed nearby, as me and my family are just after moving away from Calais because SOME of the migrants made our lives hell there.


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    #24
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭b_mac2


    Don't think I'd be shown too much compassion if I were to post that.


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    #25
    _Kaiser_
    Registered Users Posts: 28,865 ✭✭✭✭_Kaiser_


    I read through the thread in question, and I think the OP's biggest issue is going to be the cultural differences between the US and Ireland. For the most part, no-one here CARES what sexuality you are anymore (and that's a good thing!) but the OP is already starting off on the defensive and allowing/using terms like "CIS male" that have no relevance (outside maybe certain corners of social media) in this country, to color her perspective.

    With regards the accommodation aspect, many people in Dublin are lucky just to have a roof over their heads at this stage, never mind getting to decide the sexual preferences of their housemates (or who those housemates can bring home??)

    She'd be better off looking deeper into the community (gay AND straight) that she's thinking of becoming part of and then deciding if this is really for her IMO. As David Bowie sang: "this is not America"


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    #26
    LLMMLL
    Registered Users Posts: 4,588 ✭✭✭LLMMLL


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    Don't think I'd be shown too much compassion if I were to post that.

    Yeah because refugees face a fair bit of discrimination. Straight guys dont.


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    #27
    b_mac2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭b_mac2


    LLMMLL wrote: »
    Yeah because refugees face a fair bit of discrimination. Straight guys dont.

    Really? I must go around and tell all the homeless men that I see to stop spoofing so.

    Ffs, just listen to yourself.


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    #28
    LLMMLL
    Registered Users Posts: 4,588 ✭✭✭LLMMLL


    b_mac2 wrote: »
    Really? I must go around and tell all the homeless men that I see to stop spoofing so.

    Ffs, just listen to yourself.

    No need for the ffs stuff.

    The homeless man isn't homeless because he's straight...... Was that what you were trying to say?


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    #29
    Mr. FoggPatches
    Closed Accounts Posts: 681 ✭✭✭Mr. FoggPatches


    LLMMLL wrote: »
    No need for the ffs stuff.

    The homeless man isn't homeless because he's straight...... Was that what you were trying to say?
    The one b_mac was referring to is.

    I think the poster has issues. But maybe once she arrives, she'll get over them. Is any straight man really offended by the thread? Honestly? I say no.


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    #30
    LLMMLL
    Registered Users Posts: 4,588 ✭✭✭LLMMLL


    Mr. FoggPatches wrote: »
    The one b_mac was referring to is.

    I think the poster has issues. But maybe once she arrives, she'll get over them. Is any straight man really offended by the thread? Honestly? I say no.

    I don't see him talking about any homeless person who is homeless because they are straight?

    Even if they are offended, being offended is a completely different thing to persistent discrimination.


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    #31
    Boards.ie: Niamh
    Boards.ie Employee Posts: 12,597 ✭✭✭✭✭Boards.ie: Niamh
    Boards.ie Community Manager


    This thread is not Feedback for how Boards.ie in general, is run.
    While I can see that there is a discussion happening, discussing a specific poster here is very unfair to that new user.

    If you wish to continue the general discussion about whether it's prejudiced/not prejudiced to have a preference for a house mate of a particular gender or sexual orientation, I'm sure there is a more suited forum than Feedback.

    Unforunately, on the Friday afternoon of a long week I can't think of one off the top of my head. Perhaps Humanities but check with the mods there first. If anyone does open a new thread and wants me to post the link here, please PM the link to me. Cheers.

    How can I? User's guide to some features on the new site



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