I feel so alone

whattodo1

Hi everyone, Please bare with me as im not very good at wording things.

So long story short I moved to a new town 2 years ago and made "friends" pretty much straight away im 30 and live with my 3 children.

I feel like a teenager again with the people I befriended one in particular, when we'd have tea and a chat this person would bitch about all her friends like a 12 year old I never got involved as I liked the others.

Something happend with her and I was there to support but as soon as she "fixed" it I got ignored again and it seems to be the norm to get used by this person..........I tried to make an effort to do things but I got shut out, she goes through so many people and takes and takes and thinks its ok.

I know I did nothing wrong and this person seems to have turned people against me even to the point she puts up stupid posts on facebook.

I try to ignore as im a grown woman but its funny when people do wrong they make themselves look like the victim.

During the days Im off I spend them alone also nights on my own, I feel so stupid that im letting it get to me but I've just my family around and Ive a lovely partner but Ive no friends around here like normal people should have and its getting me down.

So im just wondering has anyone gone through something similar?

Clampdown

You have a partner and three kids, you're far from alone! Maybe be grateful for that and focus on them, it's a lot more than what some have, and there really is no 'normal' amount of friends to have.

Friendships are not something that can be forced, they usually occur naturally due to shared interests or activities or proximity to each other. Sometimes it can be hard to meet people especially in certain areas in Ireland where there isn't a lot of stuff to do other than go to the pub.

Is there a class or something you could join? Beginners yoga for example would be full of women around your age, is not too strenuous, and would be good for your mind and body.

Airyfairy12

I just moved on from a 25 year friendship like the one you described bar the stupid facebook posts she constantly moaned and bitched about other friends and their personal lives, contacted me when she had no-one else then dropped me when it suited her, I made all the excuses under the sun for her behaviour but really we all need to take responsibility for ourselves and if she's at that age and still carrying on like a bitchy teenager then she's not ever going to change. She's so used to using people and stuck in her ways she'll never be the good friend you want her to be, id rather have no friends than fake ones.. you can guarantee she talks about you behind your back so your better off leaving her behind.
Ive also been left in the position where I had no other friends, its lonely but youre not alone, you have your family and you should focus on them.
Friendships take time to build and you have to make an effort to meet new people, beginner yoga/aeriel classes/pilates classes will help you to meet people in your area, volunteering in second hand shops, events and festivals that take place around the town, often small towns have courses and classes run by members of the community, my own town where nothing ever happens has classes in flower arrangement, Céilí's, meditation, mosaic, arts and crafts, so look on facebook or ask around, you could even take the initiative and start your own evening or morning class. Getting involved in the community should help you to make good acquaintances at the very least which can develop into friendships over time.