Why people have children

DanielODonnell

I remember reading a comment on here a long time ago that said that your forefathers have been passing down the dna for centuries and you don't want to be the man who stops it but that is not the case because as long as you have siblings who have children then the dna is still passed on.

Children make me miserable plus I don't want to add to the human population as I think we need to eventually die out.

Arcade_Tryer

People have children because of a wonderful thing called sex.

People choose to have children so they can instil all of their healthy and not so healthy habits and beliefs in their children.

abdulabduler

wakka12 wrote: »

As far as I can see the British government is successfully providing its densely populated little nation with enough food ,water, heating, clothing, electricity, education and healthcare (within reason). Japan seems to be providing its citizens with extremely high quality of life despite the incredibly high population desnity.While one of the least populated countries on earth, Suriname has a poverty rate of nearly 50%. Other relatively poor but extremely sparsely populated countries include mongolia and Namibia. On the flip side, another two countries with very sparse population density but high quality of life include iceland and australia. Greenland is another example with very average quality of life. Clearly there is very little correlation between quality of life and population density

Over population, in numerical terms is a complete myth. Over population = not having enough resources to sustain a population. NOT the number of people residing in an area. Its very seldom that a place is literally over populated, as in its so densely packed that the population cant all seem to fit/live in the place. For example hong kong.

England, Netherlands, Ireland nor anywhere in Europe are in any way 'over populated'

If I can't go into nature such as forest or fields without seeing human activity everywhere then it's overpopulated. I would love to go to a place untouched by humans which gets harder and harder to find. And countries like England continue to breed faster than rabbits which will result in even more humans destroying the environment, nature, trees and animals to support the out of control population, just because there can be 15 billion people in this world doesn't mean there should. We are not alone on this planet and we need to leave some places untouched. Everywhere you go you see humans. Ireland is one of the least densely populated countries which makes it an exception however England, Germany, Italy, Netherlands, Belgium and most other European Union countries have very high density. Europeans make fun of China with their population but China is less densely populated than many European countries such as Belgium and Netherlands. I don't believe that humans should breed at such an extreme rate and consume the world by increasing demands, Earth is not unlimited.

Arcade_Tryer

DanielODonnell wrote: »

Children make me miserable plus I don't want to add to the human population as I think we need to eventually die out.

Safe to say humans are here to stay at this stage.

The great thing about children is that they have the potential to save the planet.

Tigger

DanielODonnell wrote: »

I remember reading a comment on here a long time ago that said that your forefathers have been passing down the dna for centuries and you don't want to be the man who stops it but that is not the case because as long as you have siblings who have children then the dna is still passed on.

Children make me miserable plus I don't want to add to the human population as I think we need to eventually die out.

Ho
Do
You mean the make you miserable? Do you mean all kids ?
If people
Want kids they should hav kids if they don't then they shouldn't
I understand people
That don't want kids they get in your stuff and they smell funny and they cost money and they are irrational
You have to worry about them and you therefore take life more serious
I think people that have kids and want them and people that don't have kids and don't want them are
Lucky cos I see loads of people who have kids and shouldn't have and people that would love be kids but are struggling to find a partner or fertility issues or they are in a same sex realationship and are finding it hard to get around that

I'm a dad and Itmakes me happy
I was a wild teenaged r and a crazy young man. But I've done that and I'm happy now to raise my son lienmy dad did and his dad did back to the apes

ChikiChiki

I'm pushing 30 now and would love a little mini me. My finances and career aspirations say differently though. Will revisit the matter at 35.

Bambi985

Richard Hillman wrote: »

I find it strange for men but can understand women because it's part of their biological make up. Men just want to mate and protect their children if they come. Women want to actually have the child part.

Not sure about that. My fella is way way more broody than me, would have them tomorrow if he had his way, whereas I'm a lot less so and although I'd like them some day, the thought of that day coming soon scares the bejaysus out of me. I like having disposable cash for one and enjoy a fair amount of personal space. Bye bye to those notions once the little gang come along.

chooey

I never wanted children in my 20s and was never that keen on them. Once I hit my early 30s I started thinking that having a family of my own some day would be nice. Here I am now at 35 with my five month old in my arms and I couldn't be happier. I wanted a child so we could have our family and it is the best thing I've ever done in my life. The first smile and laugh were unreal and it is so enjoyable.

JackTaylorFan

I think for a lot of people it's a vanity project - just look at the guy above who described his future offspring as "mini me"

But I would say hormones also play a huge role, not just in wanting sex but also wanting to be a parent.


Speaking from experience, I didn't want kids, till I started HRT, and now with healthy amounts of estrogen a maternal instinct has developed Still can't have kids, but there is certainly a regret attached to that reality that was never part of my mindset before HRT.

Geuze

abdulabduler wrote: »

Ireland has(still?) the highest birth rates in European Union. I was thinking why would anyone want to have children. Seems to me like a self inflicted torture. Screaming, shouting pooping, huge responsibility for absolute minimum of 18 years.

As a parent, let me tell that children bring unending joy into our lives.

Sure, you worry when they get sick, and okay, getting up at night during the first six months isn't great.

But they are the best thing I have ever done.

Zebra3

I suppose the plus side on having kids is that people expect the kids to clearing up their shyte in the long-run.

whoopsadoodles

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

I think for a lot of people it's a vanity project - just look at the guy above who described his future offspring as "mini me"

That's an awful thing to say about the other poster. It's just an affectionate term (s)he has used. It does not equate to a vanity project.

OldMrBrennan83

This post has been deleted.

whoopsadoodles

Patww79 wrote: »

Someone to look after you when you're old.

Also, people in Ireland think you're strange once you hit your 30's and don't have kids. There's an odd kind of fear in them.

I think that was more true in years past. I think it's becoming much more socially acceptable to choose now and a lot less judgement for it. Though there are always going to be some who cannot for the life of them understand why others don't want the exact same things as them - almost to the point of taking offence.

Your Face

Its the water additives that make people broody.

Its a clandestine government plan to breed out the Protestants and get back the 6 counties.

Irish water was set up to speed up the project.

Know the facts.

Wheeliebin30

Of course it's an act people do to bring joy for themselves. But that's human nature.

You can see it here.

I had kids to pass things onto them.

I had kids to have a family and they bring ME happiness.

I wanted kids for this that and the other.

At the end of the day it's just to bring something into your life but that's OK as it's what we all do.

Sam Kade

Cortina_MK_IV wrote: »

How did you get here?

Exactly what I was thinking, he hardly thinks that he dropped out of the sky.

namloc1980

Raelynn Mango Backside wrote: »

It's still very much the Irish way to buy a house, get married and have 3 kids so theres that too.

Yes, because that only happens in Ireland and nowhere else.

hairyslug

I always wanted to be a dad and wish I had had them when I was slightly younger, I was 29 when we had our 1st and 33 when our 3rd came along.

It is nice though to be able to hand back babies when new parents give them to you to hold.

pgj2015

how are your kids going to compete with robots for jobs?

No way am I ever having kids. I don't want the responsibility and I will be richer.

suicide_circus

I done it for the mickey money

LCD

Never wanted kids. Got married still didn't want kids. Routine medical exam through up some issues & discovered I couldn't have kids.

That changed things. We are approaching 40 now & yes have more disposable income & freedom. But you ask yourself, is this it for the next 40yrs? Just a bunch of material things & nice holidays. Sounds great, but when that becomes your reality you feel different about it.

I love my dog, he brings me so much happiness. He cost me nothing, does nothing except sleep & gives me nothing. So how can I love him, how does he bring me happiness?

fg1406

I could have written your post! I'm a little bit younger but, like you never wanted kids. Was told when I met the right person that I would want kids. Didn't happen. Got married, still don't want kids. Was told that after the "honeymoon" period wore off that we'd get broody. That hasn't happened.
I was hospitalised a few years ago and it was discovered I'd be very unlikely to conceive naturally. Didn't bother me in the slightest. The Obs Gynae Doctor was baffled by my reaction.

I have 2 wonderful rescue doggies whom I spoil. I have a niece and 2 nephews whom I also love and ruin but I have a limited tolerance level for them when they are under 5!

Noddyholder

Its great seeing your children reared & doing well for themselves, going out and living there own lives as they see fit & especially lovely when the grandkids come along, if I may say there even better than your own children as you can give them back later :-)

andekwarhola

batistuta9 wrote: »

For some it's part of a predetermined plan that they think is the only way to live life & you have to follow it.
College - job - partner - marriage - house - kids.

Others I think have kids to give them some sort of 'meaning' in their life.

So, in order to reach your true apex of individuality, you must be a single, homeless, unemployed person that has no kids and left school at 16?

Gotcha.

Arcade_Tryer

I don't want children until I want them.

OldGoat

Best source for organ transplants is a blood relative.
Just sayin'.

kunst nugget

I had kids because it became tiresome only being an embarrassment to my wife and I needed new victims. The embarrassment you can cause your kids by simply existing is truer and more pure than anything else. It's great.

sbsquarepants

abdulabduler wrote: »

For example Germany has lowest birth rate in Europe, can someone explain to me correlation between the birth rates of Ireland and Germany?

Yea, I can.
There isn't one.

Can you explain to me why you think there should be?

eviltwin

Why does anyone do anything? Because they want to. I love being a parent and always wanted children but I can't explain why. I guess I just wanted a family. I get more joy and fulfilment from my family than anything else in my life and while the early years are undeniably tough at times it doesn't last forever.

Winterlong

I dont think you can explain the want to have kids logically to be honest.

Pawwed Rig

hairyslug wrote: »

I always wanted to be a dad and wish I had had them when I was slightly younger, I was 29 when we had our 1st and 33 when our 3rd came along.

I had my first at 37. In hindsight I would have liked him at 28 or 29. Think that is a good age aa you are a bit more mature but not too old.

jimmycrackcorm

Dr Crayfish wrote:

I think you can be happy without them. I couldn't deal with not having any time to myself and being confined.

Combine teenager with PS4 and you'll soon forget that they exist in the same house.

JackTaylorFan

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

That's an awful thing to say about the other poster. It's just an affectionate term (s)he has used. It does not equate to a vanity project.

It may be the case that the other user used the term quite harmlessly as you suggest - and I agree: it probably was a throwaway comment on his/her/their part, but it still underlies an attitude some take to parenting and my point is still valid. How else do you explain children being raised in an environment where they are made to believe and follow certain things just 'cause their parents say so - i.e. religious beliefs, moral values, interest in sports teams, etc.?

suicide_circus

An individuals biological success is measured in grandchildren not children.

eviltwin

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

It may be the case that the other user used the term quite harmlessly as you suggest - and I agree: it probably was a throwaway comment on his/her/their part, but it still underlies an attitude some take to parenting and my point is still valid. How else do you explain children being raised in an environment where they are made to believe and follow certain things just 'cause their parents say so - i.e. religious beliefs, moral values, interest in sports teams, etc.?

I think it's just a case of doing what makes life easier. I don't bring my kids to church because I don't go, I'm not raising them non religious. Same as how I don't cook meat because I don't eat it, I'm not raising them vegetarian. When they reach the age of being able to think and do for themselves I don't care if they go to mass every day or live on meat once I'm not having to do it. You won't find many parents who don't see their children as individuals.

PARlance

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

It may be the case that the other user used the term quite harmlessly as you suggest - and I agree: it probably was a throwaway comment on his/her/their part, but it still underlies an attitude some take to parenting and my point is still valid. How else do you explain children being raised in an environment where they are made to believe and follow certain things just 'cause their parents say so - i.e. religious beliefs, moral values, interest in sports teams, etc.?

I'm raising my without passing on any of my beliefs or knowledge... the poor feckers can't talk, dress themselves, use the toilet or interact with others but hey... at least they're not going to Mass in a United jersey.

It's ironic that you say that having kids is a vanity project for some. There are a lot of people that are just too damn cool to have kids.

scamalert

awaiting thread where some one has 4-5 kids, pi$$ broke on welfare,and everyone giving their opinion how parents should be neutered.

its not only in Ireland but can be seen across many more developed countries,Japan is good example.

people focus more on career future to secure it,not like old days where families would pop 5-7 kids to have someone to plow fields for them.

kunst nugget

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

How else do you explain children being raised in an environment where they are made to believe and follow certain things just 'cause their parents say so - i.e. religious beliefs, moral values, interest in sports teams, etc.?

Generally, parents are going to instill the same values and beliefs in their children that they themselves have. It's generally not in a bid to make them a 'mini me' but it's because that's what they believe is the best way to live life. I'd have pretty opposite political views to my parents but I'd still share the basic morality that they raised me with - treating people with respect, not holding grudges, being thankful for the positive things in my life and not letting the negatives drag me down - which I'm thoroughly glad they taught me. It wasn't like they were going to raise me in a lifestyle completely incompatible with theirs for the craic.

beans

Where do you think the tax revenue to keep the plates spinning when you retire is going to come from?

osarusan

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

How else do you explain children being raised in an environment where they are made to believe and follow certain things just 'cause their parents say so - i.e. religious beliefs, moral values, interest in sports teams, etc.?

I wish my kids wouldn't be interested in my sports team anyway. Not yet at least.

They like the idea of being fans so they want to go, but then have no interest in actually watching the game. Much more enjoyable for me when they are not there.

osarusan

Also, to answer OP, so I have somebody to play Nerf wars with.

1 point for a body shot, 3 for a head shot, first to 10 points wins. Armchair turned on its back makes a great base.

We played 3 games last night - I told him to 'prepare for death' and he loaded his bullets right in front of me and said 'I'm preparing for your death'. He won the last game by climbing up on his armchair to get more elevation and getting me with a head shot when I thought I was safe.

astrofool

abdulabduler wrote: »

If I can't go into nature such as forest or fields without seeing human activity everywhere then it's overpopulated. I would love to go to a place untouched by humans which gets harder and harder to find. And countries like England continue to breed faster than rabbits which will result in even more humans destroying the environment, nature, trees and animals to support the out of control population, just because there can be 15 billion people in this world doesn't mean there should. We are not alone on this planet and we need to leave some places untouched. Everywhere you go you see humans. Ireland is one of the least densely populated countries which makes it an exception however England, Germany, Italy, Netherlands, Belgium and most other European Union countries have very high density. Europeans make fun of China with their population but China is less densely populated than many European countries such as Belgium and Netherlands. I don't believe that humans should breed at such an extreme rate and consume the world by increasing demands, Earth is not unlimited.

Why? Earth is one of countless planets in the universe, each of which will be as unique as the next one. Whether we're here or not, the planet will keep spinning, and eventually be burned to a crisp, we're as much part of nature as the rest of the planet, and driven in the same way as any other life on this planet. Nature will figure out a way to survive no matter what we do (however, I'm not saying that we shouldn't try and maintain our environment for as long as possible and keep it in as good condition as possible, but if we destroy it for ourselves, other life will come along and take over instead).

PARlance

scamalert wrote: »

awaiting thread where some one has 4-5 kids, pi$$ broke on welfare,and everyone giving their opinion how parents should be neutered.

its not only in Ireland but can be seen across many more developed countries,Japan is good example.

people focus more on career future to secure it,not like old days where families would pop 5-7 kids to have someone to plow fields for them.

While they mightn't be needed to plough fields they are needed for a healthy economy. How Germany is being put forward as some sort of target is a laughable. Germany is absolutely f'ed due to decades of low childbirth rates.

They had to flood the place with migrants to keep the economy ticking over and will have to continue to do so.

JackTaylorFan

eviltwin wrote: »

I think it's just a case of doing what makes life easier. I don't bring my kids to church because I don't go, I'm not raising them non religious. Same as how I don't cook meat because I don't eat it, I'm not raising them vegetarian. When they reach the age of being able to think and do for themselves I don't care if they go to mass every day or live on meat once I'm not having to do it. You won't find many parents who don't see their children as individuals.

kunst nugget wrote: »

Generally, parents are going to instill the same values and beliefs in their children that they themselves have. It's generally not in a bid to make them a 'mini me' but it's because that's what they believe is the best way to live life. I'd have pretty opposite political views to my parents but I'd still share the basic morality that they raised me with - treating people with respect, not holding grudges, being thankful for the positive things in my life and not letting the negatives drag me down - which I'm thoroughly glad they taught me. It wasn't like they were going to raise me in a lifestyle completely incompatible with theirs for the craic.

I never said every parent raises their kids with an attitude of "it's my way or..." but it certainly happens - people do raise their kids in rigid environments and force their ideas of morality onto their kids, be it veganism, or christianity or dressing them in a certain coloured jersey or whatever - it happens, and it's because some see their offspring as reflections of themselves in society and for anyone to argue that this is not the case, is quite frankly, talking out of their bottom.

PARlance wrote: »

I'm raising my without passing on any of my beliefs or knowledge... the poor feckers can't talk, dress themselves, use the toilet or interact with others but hey... at least they're not going to Mass in a United jersey.

It's ironic that you say that having kids is a vanity project for some. There are a lot of people that are just too damn cool to have kids.

Bless you.

osarusan wrote: »

I wish my kids wouldn't be interested in my sports team anyway. Not yet at least.

They like the idea of being fans so they want to go, but then have no interest in actually watching the game. Much more enjoyable for me when they are not there.

I'm not exactly sure what your point is - are your team **** or something?

Potential-Monke

When i was younger, i thought that one day i might want them. I'm 33 now and as the time is passing, i'm more and more sure that i don't want them. And it's an honest reason. I wouldn't have the patience. It annoys me when the siblings kids are visiting and are asking me this and that, they seem to love me. I reckon they can't get the smell of kids off me, so that's why they gather around. So i can put up with them for about 15 minutes, situation depending, and it's great to be able to walk away and not have to worry about them.

seachto7

Chainsaws

Chiamonkey

The same reason people have pets

Dravokivich

abdulabduler wrote: »

Ireland has(still?) the highest birth rates in European Union. I was thinking why would anyone want to have children. Seems to me like a self inflicted torture. Screaming, shouting pooping, huge responsibility for absolute minimum of 18 years. I was thinking maybe Ireland has highest birth rate because abortion is illegal? So people who don't want children are still forced to have unwanted children which results in abuse and children growing up and resorting to crime (proven by studies). For example Germany has lowest birth rate in Europe, can someone explain to me correlation between the birth rates of Ireland and Germany?


Old article from Irish times
I doubt much has changed


IRELAND HAS the highest birth rate in Europe, according to the latest statistics from the Economic and Social Research Institute (ESRI).

The birth rate of 17 per 1,000 of population, up from 14.4 per 1,000 in 2000, was the highest of any of the 27 countries of the European Union in 2009, according to the Perinatal Statistics Report 2009 published yesterday.

Ok, but what's wrong with it? Contraceptives and Condoms are available now. And I'd expect have reduced the birthrate over the last 40 years. Mortality rates have improved also. Why are you focused on ceasing a pregnancy, over reducing the potential of one in the first place when discussing Birth Rates?

Shenshen

PARlance wrote: »

While they mightn't be needed to plough fields they are needed for a healthy economy. How Germany is being put forward as some sort of target is a laughable. Germany is absolutely f'ed due to decades of low childbirth rates.

They had to flood the place with migrants to keep the economy ticking over and will have to continue to do so.

As opposed to Ireland who had to send droves of them overseas because there was no work for them once they left school?