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Access Issue

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  • 15-03-2017 12:54am
    #1
    GypsyByName
    Registered Users Posts: 308 ✭✭


    So lets say hypothetically I have been granted access to see my child by a judge. My ex partner refuses to hand over the child. What happens?


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    #2
    Loveinapril
    Registered Users Posts: 2,337 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    They are breaking the access order so you should return to court.


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    #3
    Big Bag of Chips
    Administrators Posts: 14,034 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    You should bring your access order to a local garda station (in the area where the child is) and have it stamped and dated each time you don't get access to your child. Then you go back to court showing each breach of the order. It may not make any difference, but a judge may not look too favourably on the other parent.


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    #4
    Applepie15
    Registered Users Posts: 19 ✭Applepie15


    The guards won't help as its considered "domestic", its a farce, she'll walk into court and lie and get away with it and you won't be any better for it, don't waste money on a solicitor/barrister, its only a breach of access. Its horrible that she does this to you and the child. Keep the head cool and calm.


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    #5
    cbyrd
    Registered Users Posts: 3,214 ✭✭✭cbyrd


    You can have a letter sent from your solicitor to hers after each breach or after a few highlighting the dates and times. it's a pain but can be presented in court as evidence.


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    #6
    Big Bag of Chips
    Administrators Posts: 14,034 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    The access order is a legal document. It is not 'domestic'. If it is breached the guards will stamp and date it to say it has been breached. They don't have powers to make the mother hand over the child, as far as I know, but they will definitely witness that the child wasn't made available and that can be presented to court.

    Now, getting anywhere with it in court is another story. I'm not sure if any mother has ever been penalised for withholding access. But to discourage the OP from going to the guards each and every time is just bad advice.


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    #7
    Applepie15
    Registered Users Posts: 19 ✭Applepie15


    No one said it wasn’t a legal document but It certainly is domestic and no one said they wouldn’t stamp anything, the will even log it on the computer or give you a card with their details etc BUT what use is it in court, I have NEVER found it any use and agreed the mother has never been punished for breach of access/withholding the child from access. The law is there use it for f*c*s sake.

    Fathers are just there to pay maintenance, it’s a horribly sad fact.


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    #8
    GypsyByName
    Registered Users Posts: 308 ✭✭GypsyByName


    So the judge ordered that me and my ex partner agree a location and someone to supervise access. We had 2 weeks to do this. I have sent suggestions through my solicitor to her solicitor and she has failed to reply to any of my suggestions. Therefore I have not seen my child in 6 weeks. Where do I go from here... I am back in court on April 24th to see how the supervised access has gone but there hasn't been any. What will happen?


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    #9
    nuckeythompson
    Registered Users Posts: 939 ✭✭✭nuckeythompson


    Think long term, keep bringing her back to court and keep copy of all court dates, then when the child is old enough you can show you did everything you did in your power to be there in their life


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    #10
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    Tell the judge what you've stated here. The mother did not seem to engage. You can't force her to, only request that she does.

    But I'd recommend trying an attempt of contact that isn't as heavy as a solicitors letter may be perceived. Give an opportunity for something a bit more casual/personal. Although I feel she's either blatantly ignoring your solicitor, or trying to avoid responding. Both scenario's mean you have to lead any challenge.


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    #11
    Applepie15
    Registered Users Posts: 19 ✭Applepie15


    GypsyByName wrote: »
    So the judge ordered that me and my ex partner agree a location and someone to supervise access. We had 2 weeks to do this. I have sent suggestions through my solicitor to her solicitor and she has failed to reply to any of my suggestions. Therefore I have not seen my child in 6 weeks. Where do I go from here... I am back in court on April 24th to see how the supervised access has gone but there hasn't been any. What will happen?


    Sorry to hear you haven't seen your child it's a horrible game these particular type of women play.
    Offer mediation through your solicitor, it's to late to get a summons for breach of access in time for your next court date as you need to give 3 weeks for it to be served.
    When you go to court show emails or letters requesting contact and let the judge decide or hope she doesn't turn up and get it your way.


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    #12
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    Applepie15 wrote: »
    No one said it wasn’t a legal document but It certainly is domestic and no one said they wouldn’t stamp anything, the will even log it on the computer or give you a card with their details etc BUT what use is it in court, I have NEVER found it any use and agreed the mother has never been punished for breach of access/withholding the child from access. The law is there use it for f*c*s sake.

    Fathers are just there to pay maintenance, it’s a horribly sad fact.

    That may have been the case for you but judges certainly don't look favourably on breaches of orders and either party can land themselves in serious trouble for repeated breaches.

    Your last line simply isn't true. It isn't easy and it can take time but do it right and eventually you'll have the access you and your child/children deserve.

    @ the OP, make note of everything. Show how you tried to engage with your ex. Letters, emails and even texts, print them all out. Keep everything. Show the judge how you tried and request that they decide on a time and place as your ex is unwilling to engage.

    Again, keep note of everything. Every small detail.


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    #13
    Applepie15
    Registered Users Posts: 19 ✭Applepie15


    KERSPLAT! wrote: »
    That may have been the case for you but judges certainly don't look favourably on breaches of orders and either party can land themselves in serious trouble for repeated breaches.

    Your last line simply isn't true. It isn't easy and it can take time but do it right and eventually you'll have the access you and your child/children deserve.

    @ the OP, make note of everything. Show how you tried to engage with your ex. Letters, emails and even texts, print them all out. Keep everything. Show the judge how you tried and request that they decide on a time and place as your ex is unwilling to engage.

    Again, keep note of everything. Every small detail.

    I can only go on my own personal experiences having been in front of many different judges over the years.

    Kids deserve good parents who want them and that should be all that matters, kids happiness.


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    #14
    Owryan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,024 ✭✭✭Owryan


    GypsyByName wrote: »
    So the judge ordered that me and my ex partner agree a location and someone to supervise access. We had 2 weeks to do this. I have sent suggestions through my solicitor to her solicitor and she has failed to reply to any of my suggestions. Therefore I have not seen my child in 6 weeks. Where do I go from here... I am back in court on April 24th to see how the supervised access has gone but there hasn't been any. What will happen?


    I ve seen judges order parents to engage a private agency to supervise access where the parents were unable to come to an arrangement. Its no cheap but if either side breaks the agreement then the judge will act on it.


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    #15
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    Applepie15 wrote: »
    I can only go on my own personal experiences having been in front of many different judges over the years.

    Kids deserve good parents who want them and that should be all that matters, kids happiness.

    I don't think anyone would disagree with that.


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    #16
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    Owryan wrote: »
    I ve seen judges order parents to engage a private agency to supervise access where the parents were unable to come to an arrangement. Its no cheap but if either side breaks the agreement then the judge will act on it.

    One such agency is Springboard. I think it's about €50 initially to set up and €25 per hour after that.


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    #17
    Owryan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,024 ✭✭✭Owryan


    KERSPLAT! wrote: »
    One such agency is Springboard. I think it's about €50 initially to set up and €25 per hour after that.

    There are a couple of them, AFAIK they only take cases where there is no child welfare/protection issue.

    It might seem expensive but there is a need for such services. At the moment social workers are being asked to supervise access and neither the staff nor the resources are always available.


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    #18
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    No child welfare or protection issue should not require access to be surpervised.


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    #19
    Vicxas
    Registered Users Posts: 15,365 ✭✭✭✭Vicxas


    Its horrible that you needs the courts to see your own child.


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    #20
    Owryan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,024 ✭✭✭Owryan


    Dravokivich wrote: »
    No child welfare or protection issue should not require access to be surpervised.


    In my experience supervised access is only ordered where a concern exists but where that concern doesn't require social work involvement.


    For example, 1 case where supervised access was ordered was because the father had been absent for some time and it was felt that supervised access was appropriate as a means of reintegration into his kids lives


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    #21
    GypsyByName
    Registered Users Posts: 308 ✭✭GypsyByName


    So she didnt turn up today for court hearing on access. Case was put back until next month. Judge said if she doesnt turn up he would issue a bench warrant. Would gardai act on this?


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    #22
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    GypsyByName wrote: »
    So she didnt turn up today for court hearing on access. Case was put back until next month. Judge said if she doesnt turn up he would issue a bench warrant. Would gardai act on this?

    I don't see any reason why they wouldn't. She's been ordered to court and not turning up is contempt of court. What eould happen after that I have no idea but the judge would.not be impressed with wasting the courts time and it'll work in your favour. Unfortunately it means it drags on a little longer.


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    #23
    Owryan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,024 ✭✭✭Owryan


    GypsyByName wrote: »
    So she didnt turn up today for court hearing on access. Case was put back until next month. Judge said if she doesnt turn up he would issue a bench warrant. Would gardai act on this?

    They have, but it wouldn't be the ideal course to take as if often just makes things worse for all sides.

    Ideally there should be some sort of communications to get her to turn up.


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