Socialising at Work

slovakchick

You a dentist davo10?

davo10

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Why didn't you try and force them together for drinks, that might have worked? Doesn't sound like you did much to help them for a guy so particular about how perfect your employees are and how great you are to invest in them. I thought you could spot these people a mile off?

You can't force people together. And I certainly did try to retain that employee, but the situation was irretrievable. Had they made more of an effort to sort out the issue earlier it might not have got so far but by the time it was brought to my attention it had boiled over. This was an example of an older and younger coworker clashing, it has not happened since they have made more of an effort to get to know each other..

davo10

slovakchick wrote: »

You a dentist davo10?

Yip. Owner of a large dental and medical practice with both dentists, Doctors, nurses and admistrative staff. As I said, we all rely heavily on each other in a high pressure enviornment where personality clashes make it difficult to run the business effectively. That is why I have said that this approach is particular to my business and would not work in a large IT, manufacturing or sales business. I didn't want to divulge my business because, in principle it shouldn't matter but perhaps it sheds more light on my situation. An unhappy Doctor/Dentist/nurse/administrator is not in the publics nor the employees interest.

Wanderer2010

davo10 wrote: »

You can't force people together. And I certainly did try to retain that employee, but the situation was irretrievable. Had they made more of an effort to sort out the issue earlier it might not have got so far but by the time it was brought to my attention it had boiled over. This was an example of an older and younger coworker clashing, it has not happened since they have made more of an effort to get to know each other..

Who stayed in the end? Why didnt both go if they were causing trouble?

davo10

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Who stayed in the end? Why didnt both go if they were causing trouble?

Because they were both excellent and one left, they weren't causing trouble to me, they just couldn't work together. You would be amazed (or not as the case may be) what kicked off the incident. An off the cuff remark that had they known each other better, would have been passed off as relatively innocuous but because they didn't, offense was taken and it got blown out of proportion. That is when I said at a meeting that we all needed to work together and get to know each other better so that these things don't happen again.

Wanderer2010

davo10 wrote: »

Because they were both excellent and one left. You would be amazed (or not as the case may be) what kicked off the incident. An off the cuff remark that had they known each other better, would have been passed off as relatively innocuous but because they didn't, offense was taken and it got blown out of proportion. That is when I said at a meeting that we all needed to work together and get to know each other better so that these things don't happen again.

Or you could have just put that down to a personality clash which happens every single day of the week in every workplace. You do know thats normal and can never be fully eliminated right?

ZeroThreat

Mountainsandh wrote: »

The way you are presenting it comes across as very passive-aggressive. I'd hate to work in such an atmosphere.

OP I'm the same. I think it's ok, and I respect that in others, I also respect people who love to spend their breaks gossiping. Work is work, private life is private, and I consider lunch breaks to be my own time. No one would bat an eyelid if someone said they're going for a quick run at lunch, or playing tennis for half an hour or something, so really, if you wish to read a book in your car or even take a power nap, that should really be treated in the same manner. Interactions about work take place in work time.




It seems strange that you don't seem to understand that people may like their job, be happy doing that job, and "like" (ie be perfectly friendly with and able to communicate with) colleagues without the socializing aspect. Tensions may arise and resolve within a work environment, without a need to spill that into the outer realm.

It strikes me too, that your employees may simply have understood that a certain veneer of social "happiness" is required in your work environment, and they simply play along for the sake of their career.
I would personally hate to play-pretend for my entire professional career, although I understand that is how some people choose to live their life.

I think I may know who davo10 really is...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=J4FwrBk-QD0

slovakchick

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Or you could have just put that down to a personality clash which happens every single day of the week in every workplace. You do know thats normal and can never be fully eliminated right?

Davo10 you should have your own AMA

the_syco

slovakchick wrote: »

The miserable ****s with social anxiety as discussed previously?

I'd mark that down as the can't. Strangely enough, the won'ts are often extroverts in the office.

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

That's not how unions work. You don't just ask for one. Theres a Mandate, a Trade Union agreement and it lays down terms and conditions for how workers are meant to be treated, including procedures for complaints etc.

13 years ago, I found that most unions need at least 60% of the workforce to join the union (I think the only one who would speak to us was SIPTU). Couldn't get one at the time due to the amount of part-timers who were easily replaceable.

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Id love to hear from your staff as to how they really feel about being forced to socialize 4 times a year outside of company hours.

Four times a year is not really that much. Considering one will probably be the xmas do, it's three events throughout the year.

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Or you could have just put that down to a personality clash which happens every single day of the week in every workplace. You do know thats normal and can never be fully eliminated right?

Unless I read it wrongly, Davo10 didn't sack them; one left.

davo10

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Or you could have just put that down to a personality clash which happens every single day of the week in every workplace. You do know thats normal and can never be fully eliminated right?

A personality clash which led to a valued employee leaving. Of course you cannot fully eliminate the potential for conflict, but you should not be so critical of someone who does their best to try and limit it. Better communication leads to better understanding and my staff often don't have time during work hours for the personal interactions which make the working day easier for all concerned. These are highly paid individuals who don't need me to pay for their drinks, but they appreciate the gesture and the effort mprovement in atmosphere is palpable.

Stheno

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