Ann Summers parcel

GuessWhoEh

Has anyone ever gotten deliveries from Ann Summers? What's the packaging like?

I don't want any awkward encounters if one of the parents has to open the door and I physically haven't the time to pop into Ann Summers plus, online is cheaper!

the_syco

Are you near a Parcel Motel location?

Macca07

http://www.annsummers.com/deliveryreturns/

They have a YouTube video explaining their packaging

VinLieger

Come on now OP.... what did ya get?

Your Face

Its a big pink parcel with feathers attached.
There's writing on it which reads -
'Ooer missus I'm a right kinky minx don't you know'

biko

It's a big brown box that says PORN on it.

vandriver

They turn everything on to test it,and sometimes forget to turn them off again.


Buzz,buzzz

fxotoole

Parcel Motel.

[/thread]

biko

Have it sent it to your gran's house instead.

bobmalooka

OSI wrote: »

There is no packaging. They just stick an address label on your giant pink dildo and shove it in the nearest post box.

Lies

It won't fit through, they leave it on the doorstep

suicide_circus

Buttplugs4u

Sue Pa Key Pa

C'mon OP, How big is your package?

Glenster

Boring answer, but its plain packaging.

No Ann Summers name anywhere.

2smiggy

Glenster wrote: »

Boring answer, but its plain packaging.

No Ann Summers name anywhere.

booooooooooo

whoopsadoodles

OSI wrote: »

There is no packaging. They just stick an address label on your giant pink dildo and shove it in the nearest post box.

Yip.

RhubarbCrumble

It's just a plain brown box OP, or it used to be anyway. I had an Ann Summers party a few years ago and all of the orders were delivered to my house afterwards. Everything was just in a brown box. I think any underwear was in one of those sealed opaque bags, same as you'd get if you order clothes from any store online. It shouldn't look 'suspicious' at all.

Jimoslimos

You could always ask the delivery company (DP...d) to drop it in by the back door.

Anyway AS strikes me as being tacky and its stuff has a reputation for being poorly-made.

Robsweezie

''special delivery for GUESSWHOEH THE DIRTY HOOR''

vandriver

Jimoslimos wrote: »

You could always the delivery company (DP...d) to drop it in by the back door.

Anyway AS strikes me as being tacky and its stuff has a reputation for being poorly-made.

Well done,sir

Arcade_Tryer

OSI wrote: »

There is no packaging. They just stick an address label on your giant pink dildo and shove it in the nearest post box.

What if it's too big?

Grandeeod

Plain packaging/box, but the delivery driver knows where it has come from.

corner of hells

A "friend" of mine is a delivery driver for them and any package delivered is completely unidentifiable.

However his truck , is a forty foot one is emblazoned in with Ann Summers products.He also has a large horn to announce his arrival... the horn is on the truck.

Cupcake_Crisis

It doesn't matter what the packaging is like, if your ma is anything like mine she'll open it either way.

kittensmittens

corner of hells wrote: »

A "friend" of mine is a delivery driver for them and any package delivered is completely unidentifiable.

However his truck , is a forty foot one is emblazoned in with Ann Summers products.He also has a large horn to announce his arrival... the horn is on the truck.

Exactly how long have you waited to tell that story? You must have known having a mate who delivers for AS would be a usuable anecdote at some point in AH? :P:D

OT, stuff is overpriced for the cheap quality, esp the underwear which is rubbish quality.

Discodog

Get a document tube from an Art shop. Fill it with sweets & print off the Anne Summers logo & attach it to the tube & send it registered delivery :pac:

Are Am Eye

Maybe give Ann a shout herself and specify how you want the stuff
delivered.

corner of hells

Jimoslimos wrote: »

You could always the delivery company (DP...d) to drop it in by the back door.

Anyway AS strikes me as being tacky and its stuff has a reputation for being poorly-made.

kittensmittens wrote: »

corner of hells wrote: »

A "friend" of mine is a delivery driver for them and any package delivered is completely unidentifiable.

However his truck , is a forty foot one is emblazoned in with Ann Summers products.He also has a large horn to announce his arrival... the horn is on the truck.

Exactly how long have you waited to tell that story? You must have known having a mate who delivers for AS would be a usuable anecdote at some point in AH? :P:D

OT, stuff is overpriced for the cheap quality, esp the underwear which is rubbish quality.

Do these answers mean you two have managed to wear out a "toy" from overuse ?

Hellrazer

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

It doesn't matter what the packaging is like, if your ma is anything like mine she'll open it either way.

Reminds me of the time when I used to keep Tarantulas as pets and I used to get them delivered to my job.They basically put a 24 hour heat pack in the box to keep them nice and warm and survive the journey from wherever.
Anyway the old receptionist knew never to open packages for me as Id told her what was in them.
So this new receptionist starts and I tell her not to open packages for me. She decides that shes going be smart about it and open all packages that come in regardless who they are addressed to.
So next delivery arrives with 2 tarantulas in it that are 8 inches long.

Well I never heard someone scream the way she did. But she didn't open packages addressed to anyone else again!!!

gerard2210

I had a registered package from China for a woman on my route, "9 VIBRATORS " was written in fairly large lettering and of course it was registered. The poor woman was mortified signing for it. Apparently they were for a hen party.

Fred Swanson

This post has been deleted.

mailforkev

A couple of years ago my parents were away so I was popping over to their house every couple of days to check up, collect mail etc.

Whilst there the postie called with a parcel for the retiree next door neighbours. They weren't in, he said, would I mind taking it for them. No problem said I.

It was plain "discreet" packing but a seasoned perv like myself can spot a Lovehoney label a mile away.

Dropped it in a while later and gave the old lad next door a knowing smile and nod. Not sure how I kept a straight face.

Hope I'm still getting filth parcels delivered in my 70s!

GuessWhoEh

So basically I've to grin and bare it if the parentals decide to open the door to the delivery man?

That's my luck for attempting to treat myself to some undies. Relax, I couldn't bring myself to get anything else

Pac1Man

That's a treat? Would a five pack in Pennies not have done the same job?

whiskeyman

Discreet packaging they said...




:pac:

corner of hells

Pac1Man wrote: »

That's a treat? Would a five pack in Pennies not have done the same job?

A bloke I know told me you can't get crotchless undies in Pennies.

mikeoneilly

VinLieger wrote: »

Come on now OP.... what did ya get?

A penis extension

peckerhead

GuessWhoEh wrote: »

So basically I've to grin and bare it?

If you're already embarrassed about the parcel, I suspect that unsheathing yourself in front of your parents will only worsen matters.

Pinch Flat

Macca07 wrote: »

http://www.annsummers.com/deliveryreturns/

They have a YouTube video explaining their packaging

"So it Perfectly fits the
box"....fnar....fnar....

Pac1Man

corner of hells wrote: »

A bloke I know told me you can't get crotchless undies in Pennies.

Go to the counter and ask for 'Marlene'. Tell her Pacman with a 1 sent you.

GuessWhoEh

Pac1Man wrote: »

Go to the counter and ask for 'Marlene'. Tell her Pacman with a 1 sent you.

Marlene.

Got it.

Robsweezie

GuessWhoor....sorry

pontoonz

my wife buys all her "implements" from orion.de

Glenster

Vegetable aisle.

Problem solved.

kittensmittens

corner of hells wrote: »

A bloke I know told me you can't get crotchless undies in Pennies.

Same guy that drives the truck? And the only AS items I had were not battery related, thanks very much :pac:

Oh and OP, you should have started this thread before you made the order, if its lingerie you bought, you've been done(its so expensive for what it is and wont get a second *ahem* outing as will fall to pieces

kittensmittens

I have a mate, guy in his 30's(the anecdotes on here just made me remember it)who made an order for some "goodies" for himself and his partner as a surprise during last summer. There were quite a few exotic bits on the order and he was well looking forward to getting it delivered. He made the order and waited.
Good few weeks passed before he remembered about it. Thinks "Where the hell is the order?"

Goes online to check the status and freezes.
The same crowd he ordered them from, he had ordered a set of solar light things the last time he had used the site. He had ordered the lights for his MOTHER and had used her delivery address for the lights. Never checked when ordering his toys and had used his MOTHERS DELIVERY ADDRESS!!!
Item had been delivered the week before!!!

Thing was, his mother never said the package came. And he knew they had been signed for. By her.
So he tells us this ashen faced in the pub that there were 2 scenarios.
A: His mother opened it and was appalled at its contents and never said a word or
B : He now knew the reason his dad had a smile on his face the size of a cheshire cat and was complaining about hurting his back all week.

PandaPoo

I ordered stuff from playblue earlier today. I won't be here tomorrow so they'll drop it in next door.
They promise discreet delivery but last time the label said playblue ffs.

kittensmittens

PandaPoo wrote: »

I ordered stuff from playblue earlier today. I won't be here tomorrow so they'll drop it in next door.
They promise discreet delivery but last time the label said playblue ffs.

Maybe the neighbours will think its knock off cigarettes you've ordered?
John Playblue

Will you hand me my jacket?

Cupcake_Crisis

Hellrazer wrote: »

Reminds me of the time when I used to keep Tarantulas as pets and I used to get them delivered to my job.They basically put a 24 hour heat pack in the box to keep them nice and warm and survive the journey from wherever.
Anyway the old receptionist knew never to open packages for me as Id told her what was in them.
So this new receptionist starts and I tell her not to open packages for me. She decides that shes going be smart about it and open all packages that come in regardless who they are addressed to.
So next delivery arrives with 2 tarantulas in it that are 8 inches long.

Well I never heard someone scream the way she did. But she didn't open packages addressed to anyone else again!!!

I'd have been taken out in a body bag!!

fxotoole

kittensmittens wrote: »

I have a mate, guy in his 30's(the anecdotes on here just made me remember it)who made an order for some "goodies" for himself and his partner as a surprise during last summer. There were quite a few exotic bits on the order and he was well looking forward to getting it delivered. He made the order and waited.
Good few weeks passed before he remembered about it. Thinks "Where the hell is the order?"

Goes online to check the status and freezes.
The same crowd he ordered them from, he had ordered a set of solar light things the last time he had used the site. He had ordered the lights for his MOTHER and had used her delivery address for the lights. Never checked when ordering his toys and had used his MOTHERS DELIVERY ADDRESS!!!
Item had been delivered the week before!!!

Thing was, his mother never said the package came. And he knew they had been signed for. By her.
So he tells us this ashen faced in the pub that there were 2 scenarios.
A: His mother opened it and was appalled at its contents and never said a word or
B : He now knew the reason his dad had a smile on his face the size of a cheshire cat and was complaining about hurting his back all week.

"a mate"

riiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggghhhhhhttttt.......................................

kittensmittens

fxotoole wrote: »

"a mate"

riiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggghhhhhhttttt.......................................

If it was me I'd admit it :D

I'm not of the male variety either