General life issues

PDoyle1465

Hello all! I'm a 20 years of age and currently in college studying computer systems management, recently I have had problems that have made me question myself

Firstly it's got to do with my family, I feel like they like to gang up on me and threat me like a child, for example making sly remarks on how I am doing nothing to support the family that I am lazy etc, mother telling me what I can and what I can't do, for example not allowing me to spend my own money that I earned, making me change cloths etc which in my opinion is stupid and is unfair, I feel like I'm the outcast of the family due to my older brothers and sisters moving on with there life being married and so on

Another issue is job hunting, in the past I had jobs as a valitor and a service advisor at a garage, but even with that experience I can't find a job anywhere!! Which again is causing problems with my family.
My friends all around me are getting jobs left right and Centre and it's really downgrading,

Everything rolled up, I just feel like I'm doing nothing and making no one happy, when I think about it, it worries me and causes me to stress, I tried talking to my family about it but there old fashioned and started to laugh and telling me to grow up, I just don't know what to do or think,
Thank you

Xterminator

Hi OP

First up, i hope you are enjoying the computer systems management course. There are more and more vacancies in this area, and its a good choice from an employment perspective.

Getting a job, summer part time etc, is a matter of luck and perseverance. don't get discouraged when you get no replies etc. Just keep trying. Have you signed up for the job alerts on irish jobs? have you got a bunch of cv's ready to go? always have a couple of cvs in a folder in your backpack, when your heading out.

If you feel they treat you like a child your best bet is to show them you are not. Try to be as independant as possible. Does mammy still make your dinner and do your washing? do you clean your own room and help around the house as much as possible? This time of year you can be out cutting the grass every second week. see can you help out with shopping, cleaning etc.

an self sufficient person can do all their own chores and help out at household chores too.

And when you are applying for jobs let your family know you are trying. if they know your applying for 10-20 jobs a week, they won't assume you're lazy.

Its a pity you cannot talk to someone in your family about your concerns, but perhaps a member of your extended family would be available to talk with, seek advice from etc? EG Aunt Uncle etc.

one thing i picked up on in your post was the comment

mother telling me what I can and what I can't do, for example not allowing me to spend my own money that I earned, making me change cloths etc which in my opinion is stupid and is unfair

You come across quite childish here.

Can you examine the situation from your parents perspective, ie put yourself into their shoes. If your not only living under their roof, but being subsidised through college too, (im making some assumptions here) then perhaps you can accept they feel they have a say in how you spend any savings? i think thats reasonable.

Should you have to be told when you change your clothes? should you not be changing them before your told? Again if your letting mum wash your clothes etc, then her having a say is not unreasonable.

good luck