Toddler waking screaming

VandC

Hi,

Looking for some advice on getting my nearly 2 year old to stay asleep.

Her bedtime routine for the last year and half has been give the soother (don't judge me cos she still has it), quiet playtime, upstairs, brush teeth, get changed, kiss and cuddle in to bed and then sleep.

This has been working fine for over a year and she used to sleep then for at least 12 hours straight but the last month she has turned in to an inconsolable screeching machine!

She has a new sister about 3.5 months old but dotes on her. Baby is in bed by then so it's not like she wants to get up cos baby is downstairs.

2 yo gets lots of attention, is not teething. She's usually exhausted and goes to bed about 7/7.15. She has lots of activity during the day. Eats well, no junk. Has 1.5 to 2 hour nap during day.

She generally doesn't protest bed, even falls asleep but then 30 min to an hour later wakes up screaming the house down. No one has made a noise (I could have had a party previously and she wouldn't wake - now we're afraid to move but silence doesn't work either). She is totally inconsolable but will fall back to sleep anywhere between 30 min to three hours later.

Even with missing this sleep she still wakes at 7 the next morning but is shattered by nine!

I dunno what's caused it or why it continues. Any tips or advice especially now as it's starting to wake baby and we're left trying to settle both of them, the younger one only awake cos of the screams of the older one!

Thanks

bp

It could be night terrors. So if she usually wakes 30 minutes into sleep go into her room 25 minutes after sleep and shift her position. Don't wake her fully but break the sleep cycle.

73trix

We had this for a while with our son somewhere between 18mths and 2. I read at the time that it could be night terrors and it was always without fail within the first hour of sleep. Somewhere it was said it could be connected to being overtired. I can't really rem the when and the how but they stopped. Haven't had this any more than once or twice now in almost a year - fingers crossed.

mulbot

We had this for quite a while-It seemed to be night terrors. We found they started after we made a few house moves incl. a move back from abroad. We have wondered if it's possible that a major change in routine can cause them.

Dtp1979

Any chance it's the heat? Dress the child less going to bed. Rooms are probably around 24 degrees this weather and that's hard to sleep in if youre wrapped up

MysticMonk

Make sure the room is ventilated,maybe leave a window open

VandC

Thanks all. I think she is cool enough, she's wearing less to bed than normal and the we have a window on vent and she doesn't seem warm.

I'll try to shift her twenty five min in to sleep and see if that works.

If it is night terrors is there anything else I can do to prevent

_Brian

Sounds like night terrors.
Our eldest had them and would only go back to sleep if she was in her mothers arms afterwards.

It went on for maybe 6 months few nights a week but she grew out of it.

Oh, don't ever feel you have to excuse something like using a soother. It's your child and you do what you see fit.

73trix

[QUOTE=_

Oh, don't ever feel you have to excuse something like using a soother. It's your child and you do what you see fit.[/QUOTE]

+1 We still give our lad a soother at night.

shesty

+1 both ours have them.Santa or the tooth fairy will remove when they are old enough to understand....it's only for sleeping anyway.Whatever works.

VandC

Hi all, thanks for the additional feedback. I just spent a little time reading up on night terrors. They all seem to say that the child isn't awake when they're having them. She defo is awake and is standing up in her cot. Could it be something else? Think tonight I'm gonna start a diary to see if I can get a definite pattern.

mulbot

VandC wrote: »

Hi all, thanks for the additional feedback. I just spent a little time reading up on night terrors. They all seem to say that the child isn't awake when they're having them. She defo is awake and is standing up in her cot. Could it be something else? Think tonight I'm gonna start a diary to see if I can get a definite pattern.

Our little one appeared to be fully awake,either sitting or standing etc,but always would seem to just look right through us, some nights a soothing voice would calm her,but the same technique would only aggravate the situation he next night-Our GP was positive they were night terrors. It is very frustrating at times-you feel helpless- but hopefully it will pass for you

autumnbelle

Identical situation going on here- would love any advice.. almost certain its night terrors too as it its always about an hour after he goes down

happywithlife

I agree probably night terrors - my second lad is also going through it at the moment. And it's easy to think they are awake too but they're not really - I liken it to sleepwalking. It's a dose but they outgrow it.

Madam Oblong

Having the same issue here so I feel your pain!

superman28

Check the temperature in the room ,, we bought a fan it helps cool the room and they like the soft sound in the background. Also,, night terrors can be made worse from being over tired.. the little one may need longer more naps during the day,, or to be put to bed earlier.. (although it sounds like she sleeps plenty)

Also, it might be time to consider a soft light in the room (you can get it in ikea) this plus a little teddy blanket (its a little blanket with the head of a teddy).. I find that when the baby wakes they can sooth themselves back to sleep.

The only other thing I could suggest is to give her a drink and a quick nappy change. - this could at least shorten the time awake.. I feel your pain.. this is me up every night.

screamer

14 month old here and has been like this for ages. I agree with the others a small plug in night light near where they sleep stops them going into a really deep sleep and I think lessens the night terrors. Also if they awaken the light is reassuring until you can get to them to comfort them. My guy screams his head off if he wakes in a dark room.

VandC

Hi all, just wanted to say thanks for all the feedback and to give a bit of update. So after all the messages I read up on night terrors, monitored her more and not entirely sure that she was having NT as you could communicate with her. It was almost like she was starting to drift off but decided that sleeping was not for her and wanted to protest bedtime.

What I have found works, at least for now, is that I am controlling her nap times during the day. I used to be let her nap when she wanted to nap, ie if she wanted her nap to start at three that was fine and she slept for as long as she wanted within reason but no more than 2hrs-but in this scenario she would be up by five and I was trying to put her to bed 2 hours later at 7. Now my rule is that she is no longer allowed sleep past three and she can only sleep 1.5-2hrs max - more towards 2hrs if she is particularly tired and tbh if this was the case when I go in she is usually just chilling lying with her teddy by this time. If I find that she hasn't indicated that she is tired by 1.45, she is put up for a nap and if she does go down, which she usually would, then she is woken by 3. This allows 4 hours between wake up and bedtime. But whatever happens she is always up from day time nap by 3.

Now she seems to want to nap naturally around one o'clock more, sometimes as early as half eleven! But I'm happy to go with this flow. And by bedtime she is waving up the stairs and can sometimes be looking to go to bed by six! Happily singing and talking to her teddy in her cot till she falls asleep, which usually happens in about 5-15 minutes after we leave the room, must depend on how deep that conversation is

73trix

VandC wrote: »

Hi all, just wanted to say thanks for all the feedback and to give a bit of update. So after all the messages I read up on night terrors, monitored her more and not entirely sure that she was having NT as you could communicate with her. It was almost like she was starting to drift off but decided that sleeping was not for her and wanted to protest bedtime.

What I have found works, at least for now, is that I am controlling her nap times during the day. I used to be let her nap when she wanted to nap, ie if she wanted her nap to start at three that was fine and she slept for as long as she wanted within reason but no more than 2hrs-but in this scenario she would be up by five and I was trying to put her to bed 2 hours later at 7. Now my rule is that she is no longer allowed sleep past three and she can only sleep 1.5-2hrs max - more towards 2hrs if she is particularly tired and tbh if this was the case when I go in she is usually just chilling lying with her teddy by this time. If I find that she hasn't indicated that she is tired by 1.45, she is put up for a nap and if she does go down, which she usually would, then she is woken by 3. This allows 4 hours between wake up and bedtime. But whatever happens she is always up from day time nap by 3.

Now she seems to want to nap naturally around one o'clock more, sometimes as early as half eleven! But I'm happy to go with this flow. And by bedtime she is waving up the stairs and can sometimes be looking to go to bed by six! Happily singing and talking to her teddy in her cot till she falls asleep, which usually happens in about 5-15 minutes after we leave the room, must depend on how deep that conversation is

Well done!