General gaming discussion

awec

The word “gamer” conjures up images of a socially inept stereotypical nerd type who does nothing else in life but play video games.

It is cringe inducing every time I hear it.

kunst nugget

Pac1Man wrote: »

How does one make sure one is not a man baby? Asking for a friend

Probably by not wrapping up your whole identity up in a hobby you have, by owning your failings and not blaming others for them and by interacting with the real world on a regular basis.

SeantheMan

Important to note...as someone pointed out on reddit of all places....is that it's not something you can self-diagnose.

Also....it has 3 important diagnostic features

1: "One is that the gaming behavior takes precedence over other activities to the extent that other activities are taken to the periphery," he said.

2: The second feature is "impaired control of these behaviors," Poznyak said. "Even when the negative consequences occur, this behavior continues or escalates." A diagnosis of gaming disorder, then, means that a "persistent or recurrent" behavior pattern of "sufficient severity" has emerged,

3: A third feature is that the condition leads to significant distress and impairment in personal, family, social, educational or occupational functioning, Poznyak said. The impact is real, he said, and may include "disturbed sleep patterns, like diet problems, like a deficiency in the physical activity."


For a diagnosis to be made, the negative pattern of behavior must last at least 12 months: "It cannot be just an episode of few hours or few days," Poznyak said. However, exceptions can be made when the other criteria are met and symptoms are severe enough.

So they are very similar to substance or other really addictive behaviors that completely affect your life.
It's not just ...I game for 4 hours a day...hence I'm an addict. I can see it being an issue of course, internet addiction is a real thing too.

https://edition.cnn.com/2018/06/18/health/video-game-disorder-who/index.html

kunst nugget

SeantheMan wrote: »

Important to note...as someone pointed out on reddit of all places....is that it's not something you can self-diagnose.

Also....it has 3 important diagnostic features



So they are very similar to substance or other really addictive behaviors that completely affect your life.
It's not just ...I game for 4 hours a day...hence I'm an addict. I can see it being an issue of course, internet addiction is a real thing too.

https://edition.cnn.com/2018/06/18/health/video-game-disorder-who/index.html

If you can game for four hours a day and it doesn't negatively impact any other aspect of your day then you're never going to have an issue. Plenty of people out there that would watch 4 hours or more of TV a night.

Pac1Man

kunst nugget wrote: »

Probably by not wrapping up your whole identity up in a hobby you have, by owning your failings and not blaming others for them and by interacting with the real world on a regular basis.

Dammit!

gimli2112

The behaviours required seems to describe someone who already has mental health issues but also like to play videogames.

Mickeroo

The criteria seem pretty sensible to me.

kunst nugget

gimli2112 wrote: »

The behaviours required seems to describe someone who already has mental health issues but also like to play videogames.

I think saying they like to play videogames is really understating the problem. It would be like saying a gambling addict just likes to place bets.

It's one of the reasons I hate loot boxes in games. They are totally unregulated and they are a pretty insidious way for publishers to make very easy money from people with addictive personalities.

gimli2112

No I just meant they set the criteria pretty well. When I first saw the comment I thought anyone playing moderately would be cast into the net of having a mental health issue but this is not the case.
Any addiction is a horrible thing, it's life wrecking.

KilOit

Played WoW from 6pm -1am weekdays and roughly 1pm to 3-5am weekends back on release of the main game and following 2 expansions. Caused a lot of problems in my life. That ship is long sailed, game 1 hour every 2 days or so now and the odd 2-3hour stint if something grabs my attention long enough

kunst nugget

KilOit wrote: »

Played WoW from 6pm -1am weekdays and roughly 1pm to 3-5am weekends back on release of the main game and following 2 expansions. Caused a lot of problems in my life. That ship is long sailed, game 1 hour every 2 days or so now and the odd 2-3hour stint if something grabs my attention long enough

How did you go about changing your behaviour in relation to gaming and was there a tipping point in terms of what caused you to stop gaming so obsessively?

K.O.Kiki

I think the take-away from this is that, as we have all suspected, every single "streamer" "personality" is actually mentally unbalanced.

Maxpfizer

kunst nugget wrote: »

A woman texted into Sean Moncrieff saying her son played Fortnite from 3.30pm to 12.30am and screamed at her if she tried to stop him so she basically left him to it. It was completely ridiculous. I love my kids and we all get on great with each other but when it boils down to it, I'm their parent not their friend. You have to make decisions that are not popular with them sometimes but that are in their best interests. Letting them play Fortnite 9 hours a day is not doing them any good and letting them get away with screaming at you with no consequence shows you epically suck at parenting imo.

I think a lot of the problem also stems from parents simply not understanding the nature of exactly what their kids are playing.

Obviously the 3.30pm to 12.30am thing is ridiculous but also how long does a single game of Fortnite last?

I know in Destiny, for example, I wouldn't be able to just up and abandon my fireteam during a raid and I think it would be a ****tty thing to just pull a kid from their game if they are in the middle of it with their friends.

A lot of parents don't seem to even understand how games work. Or even really how seriously their kids are taking the game.

Is pulling your kid from a game of Fortnite when it's in full flow is not going to be good for them. Better to set limits like "you can play 10 matches" or "once this match is finished you need to log out".

I feel like of course they are going to be pissed off if their clueless parent comes bumbling into their room in the middle of a match insisting that they switch it off right now. That's dumb.

Who ever wanted to be the kid who's mum comes marching down to the park to drag them away from a game of football turning a 5 as side match into 4 vs 5?

Retr0gamer

That's well and good but you can't quit after losing a match!

Kiith

I had a summer where i pretty much just worked and played WoW. Did 2 nights shift work, and then i played at least 15 hours a day i'd say. It absolutely consumed those three months, but then real life made me stop playing anywhere near that much once i went back to college. I've still played on and off for the past 10 years, but nowhere near that level. I've no doubt that anyone could easily become addicted to it, or other games like it.

Parents using games as an excuse for their kids being assholes is laughable though. It's their jobs to not let that happen, and blaming games for their kids awful behaviour is just an excuse for piss poor parenting imo.

CatInABox

Yeah, a lot of parents just use video games or the tv as a "free" babysitter, one in which the parent doesn't have to have any investment. It's a pretty s***ty way of treating a child, to be honest.

If you are going to encourage your kids hobbies, then you need to take a legitimate interest. Go to any kids GAA match and you'll see plenty of parents who'd have no interest in the sport themselves, shouting and cheering their kids team. Then they'll chat about it in the car on the way home, and more at home too. This needs to happen with videogames as well, parents need to sit there and watch their kid play, get involved in it, even if it's just chatting about it.

KilOit

kunst nugget wrote: »

How did you go about changing your behaviour in relation to gaming and was there a tipping point in terms of what caused you to stop gaming so obsessively?

No tipping point as such, I knew my life was in the hole but I didn't care, I was totally consumed by it. So many missed nights out, occassions I didn't bother to go to, I had excuses to duck out of everything.
Grew out of it mostly, it was only that game that held my attention and friendship of fellow players gave me a sense of belonging. Going travelling back in 2007 forced me to make a clean break from it, even first few weeks of being a away I longed to find a computer to log in to the game but after 6 months I didn't miss it.
When I got back I played again but it didn't have the same pull really, travelling made me realize I'm happier doing other things with gaming on the side instead of taking all my time. Met my now partner in 2011 and if that didn't happen maybe I would of fell back into the gaming routine.

Dyr

K.O.Kiki wrote: »

A video with a point that has to be repeated:
There is no such thing as "all gamers".
Every time an internet article/discussion goes in the general direction of "well, gamers don't know what they want" because a subset of fans spoke out about something, I want to reach through my monitor & strangle that particular writer for making the wrong assumptions.

"OK, people. I'd like to start this session with a question: When is a party not a party? A party is not a party when it is plural. There she is, the party, singular. She thinks like you, she votes like you, she is not you
and yet of course she is you."

You've just gone full Stuart Pearson.

Potential-Monke

Let's reclaim the term Gamer! Gamer and proud. Eventually, non-gamers won't even be allowed to say/write it, just like that other reclaimed word... Ginger. Wait... Same letters...

Anyway, I do consider myself a gamer. It's my only real past time and hobby, and I play a hella lot of games. I'm not into sport but I'll watch Limerick in the hurling (unless they keep playing like Sunday!!), I was keeping up with the highlights of the NBA, and I'll watch the odd highlights of NFL. But my true passion is gaming. I love it. Right now, i'm in so much debt due to trying to be a 'normal' person in society with a mortgage, and having to sell it and take a 5 figure loss, which I will be paying back for the next 15 odd years (strangely, i'm one of the few who actually sold my house and took a loss instead of expecting society to pay for it and let me stay).

Anyway, I have no problem with playing 8+ hours a day when i'm off. When I finish work, I usually play another 4 or so hours before a few episodes of Fairy Tail before bed. I visit friends, but I limit it to gaming friends as we have the same interests. Society wants me, at 35, to go to the pub every weekend and feed the alcohol problem we have in this country. Society wants me to gossip with other patrons in the pub. People still judge me because of my gaming, but I don't care anymore. It's not affecting anyone else. I do go to the gym to keep fit(ish), I do go to weddings, funerals, birthdays, etc, but outside of that, I spend most my time gaming.

That may take a bit of a dip soon, as I intend to work on creating my own anime, but i'll still be gaming until I die.

So, do I have an addiction? Looking from the outside in without knowing the above, people would probably say I have, but I have even my old-school parents on my side, as they see all the drama and lies that comes with being a 'normal' member of society doing what everyone else expects you to do.

Meh, doesn't matter anyway. Really don't care what other people think anymore.

TerrorFirmer

There's a big difference though between addiction, passion and simply just how you chose to spend your time in a logical way. Addiction would be when it's seriously affecting other aspects of your life, as well as your own personal health, etc.

You just sound like someone who is passionate about gaming. It's not really any different to people I know who live, breath, eat, drink sports from morning until night (mostly from the metaphorical sidelines eg. the couch).

I do play a lot of games, single at the moment, and most of my friends have moved abroad, so I've a fair bit more time on my hands than I would've hand in times past. It wouldn't be unusual for me to play games for 2 hours a day, and for 6/7 hours on a day off....but only if I've nothing better to do, no different than sitting down and binging on a TV show or movies or whatever, and it certainly wouldn't take precedent over normal social engagements.

There is a strong stigma surrounding it though, plenty of people don't understand how complex games are or even how adult orientated the market generally is - I tell my parents I've spent 8 hours playing Halo with the lads and I can see it in their eyes - they still have this image of grown men huddled together in a darkened room taking turns playing Sonic the Hedgehog.

Like virtually everything else in the world though ultimately....moderation. I did see some interesting articles about this on various news outlets though.

On the very same website - one article was pretty fair and the opening line was more or less something to the effect of "Gaming is a perfectly legitimate pastime and no, your children playing Fortnite for a few hours is nothing to be concerned about."

The other (keep in mind it was the same website) was written Daily Mail style, about how kids are becoming addicted and astonishingly, can now battle against other, real life people in games like Fortnite....as if online multi-player was a revolutionary new concept, rather than one that's been around in mainstream gaming since the 90's.

Really boils my blood when 'journalists' haven't a clue about the topic they're writing about.

Robert ninja

kunst nugget wrote: »

I'm forty years of age. To call myself a gamer would feel extraordinarily juvenile. Playing some games is just one of the interests I have and far down the list in terms of how I’d describe myself.

I read books as well - not as many as I'd like to because life gets in the way - but I'd never feel the need to proclaim myself a reader or to belong to some sort of reader culture.

No need to proclaim yourself as a reader? First of all, who, out of nowhere just proclaims these things? They come up in conversation. Like if someone asked are you a reader you'd say yes but maybe you don't read as much as you'd like. If asked are you a gamer, would you go on as much of a spiel about how it's a horrible, juvenile definition as if you were a real-time kotaku article? Because that is ridiculous and way more embarrassing. Also, it's just one out of many labels a person might have. It's not defining but it's still there. "I'm a worker" doesn't mean your person can be described as a worker, you can be a parent and other things too.

I'm convinced that this hostility to a such a simple word is from the press. They've demonised 'gamers' especially back during the height of gamergate with all those 'gamers are dead' articles.

Adults worried about seeming mature and avoiding juvenility is ironically an immature thing. Only kids think being old is cool.

When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty, I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.

C.S. Lewis

Retr0gamer

I play videogames but I'm not a gamer is my response.

I wouldn't be asked the same about watching TV.

Zero-Cool

Retr0gamer wrote: »

I play videogames but I'm not a gamer is my response.

I wouldn't be asked the same about watching TV.

Retr0NOTAgamer

CatInABox

CatInABox wrote: »

Yeah, a lot of parents just use video games or the tv as a "free" babysitter, one in which the parent doesn't have to have any investment. It's a pretty s***ty way of treating a child, to be honest.

If you are going to encourage your kids hobbies, then you need to take a legitimate interest. Go to any kids GAA match and you'll see plenty of parents who'd have no interest in the sport themselves, shouting and cheering their kids team. Then they'll chat about it in the car on the way home, and more at home too. This needs to happen with videogames as well, parents need to sit there and watch their kid play, get involved in it, even if it's just chatting about it.

Spot on. Join them and play together. If you can't then at least watch them playing and take a genuine interest in it. I have a great bond with my lad through video games. Also, if something is not suitable I'm right there with them and because I'm totally reasonable (compared to their pals parents) when I say sorry this isn't suitable turn it off then there are no arguments whatsoever, it gets turned off.

Parents should also get familiar with parental controls on their choice of device. Only problem I have with this is screen time on the xbox will cut a game dead, it doesn't take into consideration the kid could be one kill away from a victory royale! I'll always try to be ready when screen time is up to see where he's at and if he's in the middle of a game I'll extend it to let him finish. Handy that it can be done remote and without interruption through the Microsoft account website. Nintendo on the other hand will give an alarm but not cut the game dead, the negative here of course is they just keep playing

Robert ninja

As long as you don't come across like this I think you're grand

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A21wxZKiao8

Sieghardt

Retr0gamer wrote: »

I play videogames but I'm not a gamer is my response.

I wouldn't be asked the same about watching TV.

Would you say:

I read but I'm not a reader? :pac:

Billy86

Sieghardt wrote: »

Would you say:

I read but I'm not a reader? :pac:

I've heard "I read" a whole lot more than "I'm a reader". Off the top of my head the only instance I can recall of reader is "I'm not much of a reader" or "I'm an avid reader", e.g it's treated as more like what someone DOES as opposed to what someone IS, which appears to be the case dar more often with gaming.

Likewise people who like their TV aren't asked "are you a watcher" - ever. At most that would be about a specific show.

The use of 'gamer' is cringe, but thank feck for the balls between my legs because the way 'gamer girl' rolls off the tongue even worse again.

Skerries

that has put The Killers in my head

I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier…

Best advice I could give any kid or their parent: if you are in a game and someone friends you, picture a big fat balding 40 year old man in his y fronts playing games pretending to be a 10 year old. Do you really want to be his friend?


And before someone says it, no it's not me

RobertFoster

Skerries wrote: »

that has put The Killers in my head

I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier…

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.