Suicide

Lickin2me

There are a lot more suicides that are never recorded. This is due to family asking coroners court not to say suicide in its report because of stigma. i know personally of people who have begged for help only to be released hospital hours later. Its very sad. Also there is a huge increase in men young and old who have comitted suicide over gambling addiction but again its never recorded and covered up. The problem is getting so bad it needs to be probly addressed by ministers

fryup

^^^^^^^^^^^

yes, and a lot of car crashed are suicides as well....done by people who want to prevent the stigma & burden that a suicide would bring on their family and loved ones

Mint Sauce

marvin80 wrote: »

Powerful message/song by the Rubberbandits:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4WfDafHijY

JUst heard it my self in the last couple of hours. Yes its dark and distressing, but powerful, and hope raises more awareness.

McCrack

Simona1986 wrote: »

More people die from suicide here than die on the roads. When you consider the resourcing levels put into road safety and the publicity it garners, the investment in mental health is almost criminal.

How much exactly is spent on road safety and then on mental health services?

Mint Sauce

mzungu wrote: »

AH can sometimes rise to the challenge, look at the "Lets All Laugh at Depression" thread for evidence.

AHs can sometimes get bad press or negative comments around other forums on Boards, but for pressing issues, a lot of posters do find their serious and also sensitive sides.

Wanderer2010

I'm on this world long enough now to know that many many people are in utter despair behind their smile and that you can never really know what people are thinking. Ive noticed some trends though- woman complain more and yet fewer women die by suicide than men. Is that because they have a safety valve to vent to their family or friends and a problem that could lead to suicide becomes more manageable? Hard to know, but as to why more women don't actually die by suicide is a mystery.
Whereas men often bottle up a problem for months or years until they reach the point of no return and they commit suicide by violent means. Its very sad and until more high profile people admit that depression is very common and that you can get help, the problem will continue, its very sad.

BillyBobBS

Lickin2me wrote: »

There are a lot more suicides that are never recorded. This is due to family asking coroners court not to say suicide in its report because of stigma. i know personally of people who have begged for help only to be released hospital hours later. Its very sad. Also there is a huge increase in men young and old who have comitted suicide over gambling addiction but again its never recorded and covered up. The problem is getting so bad it needs to be probly addressed by ministers

It won't be addressed by ministers or the government as a whole. Best little country in the world etc.. got to keep the illusion going.

Mrs OBumble

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

....woman complain more and yet fewer women die by suicide than men. Is that because they have a safety valve to vent to their family or friends and a problem that could lead to suicide becomes more manageable? Hard to know, but as to why more women don't actually die by suicide is a mystery.
Whereas men often bottle up a problem for months or years until they reach the point of no return and they commit suicide by violent means. Its very sad and until more high profile people admit that depression is very common and that you can get help, the problem will continue, its very sad.

The last time I saw the statistics for attempts, they told the opposite story: women try more than men, but they choose methods that are less likely to succeed. (Don't know if this is still true, but it certainly was 20 years ago.)

Encouraging mentally unwell people to reach out and talk to someone is just victim blaming. We should be teaching the general population to be better at listening - to their own bodies and to other people as well. Sometimes listening should even be done with their ears.

We should also be teaching people to assume that there are helpful services available, that they simply have to keep trying until they find them. Comments about the lack of services simply discourage people from seeking help, and contributes to the level of self-harm.

7 Seconds...

When my Anxiety & Depression was really bad, I wanted to die. I stopped taking my meds, stored them up and wrote my good bye letters, set a date and decided that was it. My life was so bad that I felt even my son would be better off without me. Thankfully due to my son I live to tell the tale. But the feeling that all the sh*t was going to be over was absolutely amazing, even my counsellor said, when we discussed suicide my eyes would light up & I would actually get a new lease of life talking about ending this one. I wouldn't wish suicidal thoughts on my own worst enemy, but I can completely understand why many people choose that path.

BorneTobyWilde

Some people have nowhere to turn, and people don't see what is right in front of them.

pajor

One of the links in the OP sadly didn't surprise me, about Midleton. I went to secondary school for all 6 years in Midleton. Too many people knew somebody who knew somebody who had committed suicide in the town.

When we were in 5th year, the boyfriend of a girl in our year committed suicide. Probably better not to go into details. Really shocked us all though. Even as an angsty teenager myself I never could imagine what went through that guy's mind.

Bambi985

MagicIRL wrote: »

It is 100% perfectly normal and natural not to be OK and to not feel good about yourself from time to time. It happens to everyone. Even here on boards you'll find a monster of a thread with people from all walks of life discussing their own mental health.

While I appreciate the good intention of this post, I'd say a fair percentage of people who choose to die by suicide are beyond "not feeling good about themselves from time to time." Without having any statistics to hand I'd say there's a strong likelihood that many suicides are from a deep clinical depression which has shrouded someone in darkness and despair for more than just a few hours or days.

I've heard it described by friends who have been suicidal and I've also battled my own demons and someone telling me "we all feel bad sometimes" would only have resulted in me isolating myself even further. Same with the people-left-behind stuff. I struggle to understand the mindset of someone who wouldn't be stopped by that - it'd always be at the forefront of my mind - but for a mind that has been darkened and tortured for so long, sometimes suicide seems like a way of not being a burden on those around them.

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

TALK TALK TALK .
Who truly wants to go out of their way to help someone.
It's easy afterwards to claim they would have helped.

This is painfully honest. There are a lot of inane platitudes out there when it comes to mental health, "it's ok not to be ok" and the "talk to someone" and "there's help out there" but that can often run contrary to what you see in real life too.

When my sister got ill, I could count on one hand the amount of people who picked up the phone or knocked on the door or even simply bloody asked about her, mentioned her name, asked about me, how are you? How is she? And really were prepared to hear an honest answer. I recall so many awkward silences, so much avoidance, so many friends and even relatives that just seemingly disappeared. That's not finger pointing, mental health issues are really deeply misunderstood at a societal level, there's still something of a hush-hush attitude towards them and they make a lot of people anywhere from inconvenienced to uncomfortable.

And "just talk to someone" or "get help" can feel like climbing a mountain in your bare feet when you've already isolated yourself from the world and are still struggling with the basics like simply getting out of bed.

corner of hells

It's worth doing a suicide prevention course called ASIST , it's recognized by the HSE and the National Office for Suicide Prevention is involved.

It's free and open to everyone with it run over two days.Lots of professionals are trained in it .

It's quite raw and and there's a three hour preparatory course called safe talk you must do first.

It's well worth doing , lots of frontline people will have it too.

I couldn't agree with you more bambi. Plenty of people aren't able to manage being around those who are going through a rough time. They don't know what to do, how to be. This I believe comes from their own fears. It's like looking in to a mirror and seeing what they can't face inside themselves reflected back. If you can't tolerate your own darkness there is no way in hell you will tolerate others.

A number of years ago at one of my lowest points I broke down in front of my closest friends. They just stared at me. No attempt at comfort, no hand to take mine. I'll never forget how lonely I felt that night and their complete inability to be there for me. We are no longer friends.

mikemac2

fryup wrote: »

^^^^^^^^^^^

yes, and a lot of car crashed are suicides as well....done by people who want to prevent the stigma & burden that a suicide would bring on their family and loved ones

A bit unfair to speculate though. Car crash on a straight piece of road could well be a worker finished a long night shift and falling asleep at the wheel. If there is no note then you can't say what happened. Will there be unfair chatter outside the church?

How the hell did they crash there say the locals? Scalded with spilt coffee on their lap or probably these days messing with a mobile. I've seen your statement a few times on boards and sure it happens but the coroner decides

idnkph

<snipped>

Sometimes the brightest of smiles hides the darkest of hearts....
I hate hearing about anyone committing suicide and my deepest condolences to you and if you ever need to ramble just PM me.
Not enough people listen to ramblings and I think if everyone did then maybe a life or 2 could be saved from this devastation.

fryup

Widdershins wrote: »

The news that antidepressants have now been shown to be effective for depression and anxiety, after it was thought that they're little more than a placebo, might encourage people to look for treatment. There's too much stigma and fear around antidepressants.

well there shouldn't be...i went through hell and i mean hell 10 years back...it was either a case of going to my GP or ending it all

thankfully i choose my GP, i told her how i felt and she advised me to go on AD's, at first i was reluctant to go on them but my GP simply said.."if you had a headache wouldn't you take an aspirin?" and with those simple words i accepted her prescription

but the thing about AD's you have to find the ones that suit you and your particular ailment they will take a week or so to kick in, i remember saying to myself this is a waste of time and then one morning i woke feeling stress free and relaxed for the first time in years and it was bliss:) ...it wasn't till then did i actually realize the way i felt previously was no way to go through life because you're just suffering in silence (a cliché i know but its true)

so if there's anyone out there reading this and feeling sh!t and your mood over time never improves ...you need help..go to your GP and don't leave it on the longfinger, OK

Dyr

OSI wrote: »

Truly wonderful how you've characterised your relative and the problems they've faced.

Because sugarcoating always helps get a point across

RoisinClare6

I suffered pretty bad from December '15 until fairly recently. Still not 100%.

Most nights I cried because I felt nothing and absolutely everything at the same time other the nights I cried because all I wanted to do was live. It's complex and sometimes you honestly can't even begin to string your feelings into a sentence that you feel some body else might understand.

I am extremely thankful for the Samaritans, they were there for my lowest ever points and sometimes when I just needed to talk to another human being. I was on my own an unhealthy amount of time and they were there when it felt like nobody else was. I would have been in an awful worse place if it wasn't for there help.

It's a long road to go get our services where they need to be, I think we need to all learn how to listen better. We can tell people to talk more but sometimes those you speak with aren't listening all to well. The stigma is there still unfortunately.

It's something everyone needs to work on together. Look out for each other a little better.

Spider Web

Widdershins wrote: »

There's too much stigma and fear around antidepressants.

When people would sooner get plastered drunk and/or hoover a load of powder up their nose to ease their pain (and then face into even more of a hell with the hangover/comedown) rather than take what might only be one pill a day, it's bad.

Widdershins

fryup wrote: »

well there shouldn't be...i went through hell and i mean hell 10 years back...it was either a case of going to my GP or ending it all

thankfully i choose my GP, i told her how i felt and she advised me to go on AD's, at first i was reluctant to go on them but my GP simply said.."if you had a headache wouldn't you take an aspirin?" and with those simple words i accepted her prescription

but the thing about AD's you have to find the ones that suit you and your particular ailment they will take a week or so to kick in, i remember saying to myself this is a waste of time and then one morning i woke feeling stress free and relaxed for the first time in years and it was bliss:) ...it wasn't till then did i actually realize the way i felt previously was no way to go through life because you're just suffering in silence (a cliché i know but its true)

so if there's anyone out there reading this and feeling sh!t and your mood over time never improves ...you need help..go to your GP and don't leave it on the longfinger, OK

Spider Web wrote: »

When people would sooner get plastered drunk and/or hoover a load of powder up their nose to ease their pain (and then face into even more of a hell with the hangover/comedown) rather than take what might only be one pill a day, it's bad.

I hope it helps anyone reading this to know that you don't *have to* go into great detail with your GP if you want to try medication but don't want to 'pour your heart out'. It was enough for me to tell mine that I believed I was suffering from an anxiety problem and briefly outline how I felt and that talk therapy just wasn't 'me' at that time. If you do want counselling a GP should be accommodating and refer you for that too.

I noticed an improvement in my insomnia on the same day I started taking anti depressants. Insomnia was very tangled up with anxiety and they were exacerbating each other. I'd spent a fortune and a lot of effort on trying to get myself mentally back on track before I went down that route, and I now realise I should have started with medication for 'breathing space' instead of struggling all the time.

You're not necessarily going to be stuck on medication long term either. I only needed mine for a year. I could've come off them in half that time but wanted to be sure. And I didn't develop a biological dependence on them so I had no withdrawal symptoms or anything horrible like that.

valoren

It's admirable the amount of people who are willing to lend an ear, to listen to someone having a tough time.

Perhaps an idea for an app would be for those who are having a tough time to use it to reach out to such people.
Kind of like Uber where you use it and the nearest Uber verified car picks you up and takes you where you need to go.

If you signed up to this as an approved user and a notification is received, time willing, you would contact the person and arrange a meet up or to call to them as practical as that would be possible. Other's in the immediate area using the service would get a notification.

Nothing is better I think for someone going through a tough time than to have someone just listen to you. To be there in a non judgemental way and just get anything off your chest.

Obviously such an app is open to abuse but I'm sure there would be a means of blacklisting such people who abuse it as a means of 'crying wolf'.

<snipped>

With bi-polar and manic depressions that is often that case. Many people are left shocked not just by suicide but by _who_ committed suicide. It is so often the people who seemed to us the _most_ fully of joy and happiness and passion for life.

The problem with such forms of depression is that when they are on their "up" they are compelled to go out in the world and when they are on their "downs" they can often not even get out of bed. So we the "normal" people never see that side of them so it is truly a shock for us when they die in this way.

Most of us do not know what to look for in our friends or family as warning signs. If you ask people around you who is most likely to kill themselves in your/their family - or work place - or circle of friends you will likely find their minds instantly go to the people who always seem down or stressed or worried. They rarely think of the people who always seem full of life and jokes and laughs. Try it sometime - bring it up and see who guesses who.

Worse - when such people are "down" they themselves do not often ask for help because they start feeling like they are not worth helping and not worth the effort or that they do not want to be an imposition. When they are "up" they do not ask for help because they are so full of the joys they do not want to think about the dark places and life seems to great to be concerned with such things.

It would be wonderful if we had a list of warning signs that we could teach children in school. But I do not think we even have such a thing to teach yet. But for me I do not keep an eye out for people just seeming "down" - rather I tend to keep a close watch on people who seem to have _any_ extremes of emotion or behaviour. Even ones we might otherwise consider "positive".

And for me at least once this has paid off. There was one guy in our circles who was one of those "life and soul" guys when he was at my house parties or out for the night. Full of extreme energy and the like.

But I also noticed there were periods of time he would never been seen - would not really respond to any emails or messages - and I felt this was classic Mania behaviour. Turns out it was and I helped him on his way to seeking help and thinks right now look good.

Could just have easily _not_ been right though and I could have offended or embarrassed him - or made him uncomfortable. There really is no way to know.

So when I read people saying we need more work on depression - more awareness - and so forth I wholly agree with them. But I also fear that actually doing that is massively more complex than they seem to realise.

It is a minefield alas - and we the people walking through it are not even all that sure what a mine looks like - how it works - or what it even does.

Assetbacked

mzungu wrote: »

Rates of women dying by suicide are rising fast. So it is an issue for both men and women.

Of course it is but looking at the statistics in Ireland, the ratio of men to women is anywhere from 8-10 times higher. That, to me, would signify that there should be a gender-specific focus when it comes to assessing the problem and clearly there is something to do with men in Ireland, either physiologically or externally, resulting in such a disparity.

Perhaps, rather ironically, the lack of focus on male rates being significantly higher than female rates could possibly be related to the cause (that men are more likely to bottle up their issues whereas women are more prone to expression).

sashafierce

This post has been deleted.

Widdershins

sashafierce wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Sorry to be that person but I'm the opposite. My ex liked to offload onto me and I'd be a bottle-it-up and process it later person.

pilly

In my local area this week there was a girl of 34 found dead and rumour has it she committed suicide but yet no-one will actually say if she did or not. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. Surely the conversation is opened up if people just come right out and say "yes she did commit suicide".

sashafierce

This post has been deleted.

Hector Savage

valoren wrote: »

To be blunt, I've thought about committing suicide in recent months. I would never do it but I certainly wouldn't be arrogant enough to say I'm strong minded enough to stop it from ever happening. A redundancy, a criminal conviction or something along those lines could possibly have the potential to deeply affect me.

I even have it all planned out in my head. I would walk into the sea, we live near the beach, very early in the morning, fully clothed and just drown myself.

I think in a period of mental fragility I might just be capable of going through with that but then I think of the consequences, I have a wife and daughter, and like snapping my fingers the thoughts vanish. It's not that I'm depressed, it's more fantastical thoughts of what if, curiosity of what would happen. It's hard to describe but my guess is that it's that control someone has, the choice of being able to actually kill yourself is that which overwhelms someone and spurs them to turn that thinking into actual doing.

It's not that I am unhappy. I'm not. But there are times when things become so stressful that your mind thinks such extreme thoughts and I hope I'm smart enough to think that if they become pervasive and frequent, or if something happened to trigger those thoughts that I would ask for help. Personally, I would be embarrassed to say that to anyone. Maybe it's the need in men to not show weakness that prevents that, that it allows that process to follow through without support.

You are mirroring what I feel, but what would always stop me is I know my son would be absolutely devastated - couldn't do that to him.

mzungu

Assetbacked wrote: »

Of course it is but looking at the statistics in Ireland, the ratio of men to women is anywhere from 8-10 times higher. That, to me, would signify that there should be a gender-specific focus when it comes to assessing the problem and clearly there is something to do with men in Ireland, either physiologically or externally, resulting in such a disparity.

Perhaps, rather ironically, the lack of focus on male rates being significantly higher than female rates could possibly be related to the cause (that men are more likely to bottle up their issues whereas women are more prone to expression).

Four times higher I think, but like I say, that figures for suicide in women are on the rise and may reach more or less even in the no so distant future. I am not so sure that male suicide rates can be explained by stoicism either. That seems to be put out there a lot. I would be hesitant to see it as a separate issue for either of the genders.

Assetbacked

mzungu wrote: »

Four times higher I think, but like I say, that figures for suicide in women are on the rise and may reach more or less even in the no so distant future. I am not so sure that male suicide rates can be explained by stoicism either. That seems to be put out there a lot. I would be hesitant to see it as a separate issue for either of the genders.

Four times higher is a conservative ratio based on my reading of the stats. "Hesitant to see it as a separate issue for either of the genders." Pull your head out of your ass and accept it is a bigger issue for men and a greater focus needs to be made on men who commit suicide. Stoicism was just a musing rather than an actual suggestion. My point, which I fail to see what you are refusing to accept (perhaps you have a selfish agenda?), is that suicide rates in Ireland are significantly higher among men than women and therefore gender specific focus should be considered to address the causes.

mzungu

Assetbacked wrote: »

Four times higher is a conservative ratio based on my reading of the stats.

One of the most common assumptions about suicide is that men are more likely to take their own lives than women and that idea is resoundingly supported by the data. Men are between four and five times more likely to die by suicide than women are. In 2013, the most recent year for which figures are available, the rate for men was five times higher

https://www.rte.ie/news/investigations-unit/2015/0309/685748-suicide-the-figures/

A lot less than 8-10 times higher, I think you will agree.

Assetbacked wrote: »

Pull your head out of your ass and accept it is a bigger issue for men

What are you talking about? I stated that the suicide rate was four times as high, and then provided the link above as evidence. Granted, one year it was five times as high, but that is still a long way off your 8-10 figure. Nevertheless, I never denied that more men took their own lives.

Assetbacked wrote: »

and a greater focus needs to be made on men who commit suicide.

My point is that if we are seeing increases in the number of women taking their own lives, then we shouldn't ignore that either.

Assetbacked wrote: »

Stoicism was just a musing rather than an actual suggestion.

I have heard it mentioned a lot, I am not saying there is nothing to it, but it is more likely to be a myriad of factors.

Assetbacked wrote: »

My point, which I fail to see what you are refusing to accept (perhaps you have a selfish agenda?), is that suicide rates in Ireland are significantly higher among men than women and therefore gender specific focus should be considered to address the causes.

No, there is no selfish agenda. I pointed out your mistake when you said the male suicide rate was 8-10 times higher. Thankfully, there has been a lot of mental health initiatives recently for men, so I would be interested in what your "gender specific focus" entails?

I don't wish to see either left out at the expense of the other. If suicide rates among women are rising then that too, needs to be looked at urgently IMO. They both do. It is an problem faced by both genders, and we are all in this together, are we not?

Baron Kurtz

mzungu wrote: »

A lot less than 8-10 times higher, I think you will agree.




What are you talking about? I stated that the suicide rate was four times as high, and then provided the link above as evidence. Granted, one year it was five times as high, but that is still a long way off your 8-10 figure. Nevertheless, I never denied that more men took their own lives.

My point is that if we are seeing increases in the number of women taking their own lives, then we shouldn't ignore that either.

I have heard it mentioned a lot, I am not saying there is nothing to it, but it is more likely to be a myriad of factors.

No, there is no selfish agenda. I pointed out your mistake when you said the male suicide rate was 8-10 times higher. Thankfully, there has been a lot of mental health initiatives recently for men, so I would be interested in what your "gender specific focus" entails?

I don't wish to see either left out at the expense of the other. If suicide rates among women are rising then that too, needs to be looked at urgently IMO. They both do. It is an problem faced by both genders, and we are all in this together, are we not?

C'mon, don't let this thread go the way of the general AH style of two posters arguing endlessly about something trivial from page 10 to 67.

Let it flourish. Don't make it toxic to a point where others just won't post anymore.

Assetbacked

mzungu wrote: »

A lot less than 8-10 times higher, I think you will agree.




What are you talking about? I stated that the suicide rate was four times as high, and then provided the link above as evidence. Granted, one year it was five times as high, but that is still a long way off your 8-10 figure. Nevertheless, I never denied that more men took their own lives.

My point is that if we are seeing increases in the number of women taking their own lives, then we shouldn't ignore that either.

I have heard it mentioned a lot, I am not saying there is nothing to it, but it is more likely to be a myriad of factors.

No, there is no selfish agenda. I pointed out your mistake when you said the male suicide rate was 8-10 times higher. Thankfully, there has been a lot of mental health initiatives recently for men, so I would be interested in what your "gender specific focus" entails?

I don't wish to see either left out at the expense of the other. If suicide rates among women are rising then that too, needs to be looked at urgently IMO. They both do. It is an problem faced by both genders, and we are all in this together, are we not?

Sorry, 4 times is more accurate, I misread the chart (somehow viewing the male figures as slightly above twenty as opposed to slightly below twenty).

A gender-specific focus entails a study of how men and women are traditionally perceived in Irish society and in families as one aspect. Another aspect would be to look at economic factors and whether these are factors. If so, then perhaps biological considerations may assist determining why men resort to suicide as a result of economic factors more than women. I think understanding the differences between the sexes (i.e. that men and women are entirely different) would assist in understanding causes of suicide.

greenspurs

I wish people would stop referring to it as "COMMITTING suicide " - as it is not an Illegal act, punishable by law.
The wording of "Committing" also has a stigma , and adds to the grief of those left behind.
I much prefer to say "took his/her own life" ....
As did my workmate , 10days ago.

philstar

Widdershins wrote: »

The news that antidepressants have now been shown to be effective for depression and anxiety, after it was thought that they're little more than a placebo, might encourage people to look for treatment. There's too much stigma and fear around antidepressants.

* people should note that antidepressants on their own can only do so much... you have to make an effort to get out and about and mix with people in which anyway you can, living an insular life is unhealthy to ones mental health

dense

What I am going to say may be hurtful or offensive to some people. It may also demonstrate my ignorance of the issue, not having first hand experience of family members committing suicide.

So, lets state the obvious.
This life may not be for everyone.

Worry and depression may be exacerbated by not only being unsure of how to progress in the world but how to step off it.

Often, theres no recollection of the person who committed suicide ever being depressed, the last person you'd suspect.

The pace, the competitiveness, the requirement (propogated on social media) for faster and more impressive successes than our peers.
The relationships, the financial strains.

Why should it be that it is our feelings that come first? The ones not contemplating ending it?

How much business of ours is someone else's decision? Why do we reject their decision and not respect it?

It does seen to be respected in some circumstances.

To demonstrate that, look at what's always said after a family murder/suicide: why didn't he/she just kill himself/herself instead of taking the children with them?

The implication being that had they done that, their decision would have been respected instead of reviled.

Many also claim to understand and respect chronically ill patients supppsed right to end their physical suffering.

How many of us would avail of an out in those circumstances?
How many would stay hanging on, on someone saying hold out it, may get better.

I often wonder should we, the ones left behind by suicide, instead of thinking of our feelings most, not respect the wishes of the person who committed suicide more.

We appear to now have a pro choice nation regarding abortion, so why is the choice to end one's own life seen as so absurd?

sashafierce

This post has been deleted.

Dravokivich

OSI wrote: »

Truly wonderful how you've characterised your relative and the problems they've faced.

You should look directly into what they've said.

The mental health act, excludes people with addiction issues. The stereotype is used against them, when I'd expect the addiction issue is a result of metal health issues (anecdotally from what I've seen).

dense

Simona1986 wrote: »

More people die from suicide here than die on the roads. When you consider the resourcing levels put into road safety and the publicity it garners, the investment in mental health is almost criminal.

I'm guessing that suicide musnt cost the exchequer as much as road collisions?


One of the reasons the RSA was established and why funding goes to prevent road collisions was because of the enormous annual financial cost to the state, (the other being because of tightening EU transport legislation which the Department of Transport (seen as part of government, rather than independent) probably wasn't capable of/terribly interested in implementing.)

Burial.

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

TALK TALK TALK .
Who truly wants to go out of their way to help someone.
It's easy afterwards to claim they would have helped.

Yeah. Especially in Ireland I have found. Obviously suicide occurs for different reasons but the nature of Irish people, how we're clumped together in rigid cliques, our weird delight in hearing bad news about someone, our be grand attitude to things, our unease at a stranger trying to start a conversation, our unwillingness to be open and vulnerable at all... I think it has an impact for sure. Frankly we don't give a f*ck about others until it's too late.

BorneTobyWilde

Irish families take joy in the unhappiness of other family members. It's an Irish thing, keep everyone down, keep everybody weak.

retro:electro

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

Irish families take joy in the unhappiness of other family members. It's an Irish thing, keep everyone down, keep everybody weak.

That's a very sweeping statement statement not to mention grossly inaccurate.

ChikiChiki

Whats disheartening is this has been a crisis for many years now and I can absolutely say no progress has been made, if anything the epidemic is worsening. There is no political will to tackle it akin to the campaign to reduce road deaths which by all accounts was a success.

I've lost too many friends and family and still I'm not sure how we can fix it. Personally I felt the need to escape from it all and spent the night before I left the country at the wake of a friend who took their own life that morning. :-( Everyone at the wake told me to get on that flight. Our road had 3 suicides in a couple of years including my own father.

BorneTobyWilde

anna080 wrote: »

That's a very sweeping statement statement not to mention grossly inaccurate.

It's just me then eh .

Widdershins

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

Irish families take joy in the unhappiness of other family members. It's an Irish thing, keep everyone down, keep everybody weak.

My mother was like that. If I'd been less of an optimist I'd be a real mess, psychologically.

Ace2007

Thankfully I haven't experience the pain of it nor can imagine losing a loved one/friend in that manner, but I think one of the biggest issues is that there is still a stigma attached to it. Folk say more die by suicide than on the roads, but not nearly the same about of money is being provided by the government to tackle the problem.

The problem I see here is that when I was growing up you would see on news Monday morning - 10 people killed on Irish roads this weekend or more and why they died (drink/seat belt, etc.) - so slowly but surely people were educated, laws were changes and money was made available to sort out the problem, there is of course still an issue as 1 death is too much.

I like probably most - wouldn't have a clue how many died by suicide last weekend, for all I know it could be 3 or 33. Perhaps if it was reported more then more might be done to help those who need it - even say look into possible reasons. Again I don't know much about the issue - but online gambling has an affect on a lot of men - they are simply betting numbers on a screen and don't realise how much money there are losing until they are in a hole - stuff like that is very easy to hide from love ones. Indeed it might be months after a suicide that a family realises that a brother/father/son has lost a fortune gambling when they realise they have nothing in a will or are in debt.

If it was a mental health issue - again studies could be done, there is some Chinese thing, that you should visit a doctor when healthy and not when sick as - there is some truth in that - prevention is better than the cure attitude.

Simply sweeping it under the carpet, and not reporting it, or reporting it as something that it's not (single car accident (if there's a letter left for instance)), will never solve the problem, being honest and open - seeing the pain if has on people, understanding the reasons may help.

sashafierce

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Ace2007

sashafierce wrote: »

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Like most things, the solutions are not in the short term - find out how many died, what the reasons where - mental health, gambling, debt, marriage issues whatever the reasons and then educate people.

You teach kids/young adults not to take drugs, sex education, teach people how to look after their bodies - gym/food etc. Who teaches you to look after your mental health, you don't just become depressed over night - there are triggers - if you teach people what they are - then perhaps you can prevent them - but as a substitute to medication as medication has side effects etc.

For instance, maybe more people would go to the doctor for help if it wasn't going to cost then €50 a pop, they see that as a waste of money whereas if could save your life.

Again as I said I'm no expert, but I don't believe folk are born with the trigger already in them, things happen, but then they don't know what to do. Everyone has reason to do something, therefore everyone has a point at which them may talk - it's finding that connection that is the hard part and maybe the part that studies can help.

bernard0368

sashafierce wrote: »

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The impossible! A functioning, accountable mental health service.

My Son killed himself a couple of years ago.
He had tried 5-6 times before hand unknown to us as he lived in another town. He was always full of chat on the phone and when he came home

His friends didn't want to be the ones to break his confidence by telling the family.
When it was discovered, we eventually got him help with the HSE, a mistake.

He did not get on with the counselor appointed to him and asked to be referred to another. That is when they abandoned him, The attitude was tough luck there is no one else your on your own.

A local charity provided him with the best help they could.
I believe we came to know to late, though I don't blame his friends they should have shouted out to all who knew him especially family.