you ever been in a fight?

joe stodge

well have you?
did you win?

Rubberchikken

You first.

Donald Trump

Yes!

me_irl

joe stodge wrote: »

well have you?
did you win?

Rubberchikken wrote: »

You first.

*shouts from sideline*


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH! SCRAP SCRAP SCRAP SCRAP SCRAP!

(Personally no, and I don't intend to)

joe stodge

Rubberchikken wrote: »

You first.

fight?

got hopped by a load of lads walking home from a late night garage, got hit with a bottle to the back of the head 2-3 times before I realised what was happening, luckily enough it didn't break. I fell down and copped a lot of a kicking.

a taxi man broke it up and the lads ran away.

more of a kicking than a fight.

so no, I didn't win.

Donald Trump

As the great philosopher Socrates once said

You've gotta fight
for your right
To Parrrrtttaaayy

valoren

I think you're forgetting the first two rules OP.

PMBC

joe stodge wrote: »

fight?

got hopped by a load of lads walking home from a late night garage, got hit with a bottle to the back of the head 2-3 times before I realised what was happening, luckily enough it didn't break. I fell down and copped a lot of a kicking.

a taxi man broke it up and the lads ran away.

more of a kicking than a fight.

so no, I didn't win.

You needed Lugs Brannigan not Zapp

me_irl

joe stodge wrote: »

fight?

got hopped by a load of lads walking home from a late night garage, got hit with a bottle to the back of the head 2-3 times before I realised what was happening, luckily enough it didn't break. I fell down and copped a lot of a kicking.

a taxi man broke it up and the lads ran away.

so no, I didn't win.

I wouldn't say that's a fight... technically.

My idea of a proper fight is where someone squares it up to you and you both duke it out. Not a surprise hopping.

Y'know, they take off their glove and slap you across the face. Then before you know it you're in a field back to back about to take ten paces.

U askin bud

U startin

Akrasia

I've spent my youth playing Monopoly, Scrabble and Cluedo.

Oh, I've been in fights!

Can't really imagine being male and getting through primary & secondary school without fighting.

Becoming an adult, fighting was much easier to avoid.

joe stodge

me_irl wrote: »

I wouldn't say that's a fight... technically.

My idea of a proper fight is where someone squares it up to you and you both duke it out. Not a surprise hopping.

Y'know, they take off their glove and slap you across the face. Then before you know it you're in a field back to back about to take ten paces.

they were fighting me with me just very one sided

me_irl

joe stodge wrote: »

they were fighting me with me just very one sided

War... war has changed.

Hammer89

Only one. It was outside a nightclub in Leopardstown when I was 17. We were squaring up to one another, face to face. I'd been in a bunch of these and somebody usually breaks them up before anything happens, but we were both quite tall and burly gentlemen for our age so I guess people around wanted to see a fight this time. Even the bouncers were standing there saying amongst themselves, 'This should be f*cking class!' That's not true.

So, we're squaring up, a bunch of cuss words exchanged, before he headbutts me. "Not cool," I think to myself. That wasn't in the script for what I thought a fight was. I'm a bit dazed and before I know it a flurry of punches rain down on my head and face. "How many f*cking arms does this bloke have?" I think to myself again. Turns out his little c*nt mates capitalised on my dazed state, like a pack of lions watching a limping gazelle, and started going to work on me. I needed the 'Ah heyoooor' lady to intervene but nobody did.

They scarpered eventually, leaving me with a head gushing with blood. Few minutes later I'm with the lads, waiting for the an ambulance when some bird goes, 'Jaysus is he alright?' I literally had more Jagermeister in my body than blood at that point, so it was quite a poor question.

So I lost the fight, but I won the.....actually I didn't win the war because I had to pay €100 in hospital fees while those people were never caught. But I got a scar, and a story to tell :cool:

HandsomeBob

I've never landed a dig anyway.

Got set upon by a wannabe scummer one night who had a wingman with him, the lad couldn't fight at all so once he established I could to a degree he made his excuses and left, his buddy didn't fancy it either. Wouldn't call that a fight though but I'd consider myself well able to go and would get stuck in if and when I had to I reckon.

Dr Turk Turkelton

Akrasia wrote: »

I've spent my youth playing Monopoly, Scrabble and Cluedo.

Oh, I've been in fights!

Can end the thread now,that's pretty damn ghetto.

elperello

Yes.
But I wouldn't recommend it.

Benildus

Only the one non-school/rugby pitch fight in my life

It was a resounding victory for my opponent

Mint Sauce

Not since I was in school. More grown up, and try to avoid them situations.

corner of hells

One fight as an adult with a family member.No good came of it apart from me being given a few hours to cool off in cell and I was lucky not to be prosecuted.

The bloke deserved the hiding he got but I'll regret it till my dying day.

DEFTLEFTHAND

A few when I was younger.

Would usually get my arse handed to me.

gifted

Loads when younger....a few in my twenties but always drink related...arguments in my thirties....and can't be bothering my arse in my forties...

valoren

In 2005, in Blarney while at a wedding I left the hotel itself and went to a near by garage 200m away at circa 10pm.
On the way back to the hotel in my suit, a couple of morons, about 16 or 17, were sitting outside the garage and between them unanimously agreed that I was a f*ggot.

So they called after me......f*ggot....f*ggot....f*ggot. I ignored them first then they kept at it laughing to themselves.
After one more call of f*ggot I turned, gave them the attention they craved and said come on then. To my dismay they took my taunt seriously and sprinted towards me. The first fella a skinny little prick, I saw coming a mile off, and he got a beauty of a right cross to the jaw for his troubles, he buckled, fell to his knees and covered his face.

His fatter, slower buddy arrived a second later and started punching at me like a maniac but was hitting absolutely nothing...I believe the technical jargon is 'slapless'. He looked like George Michael dancing except his arm thrusts were at shoulder height.

I grabbed 'George' by the shoulders and like throwing a bag of coal over a wall, threw him into the low wall to my right. That hurt him. I stood there poised to continue giving them both a hiding but they scarpered away and I went back to the hotel feeling like Chuck Norris and never told a soul what happened.

Moral of the story....don't call people f*ggot and not expect a hiding.

In prison, cigarettes and drugs that are the currency that keeps things going. In boarding school (a similar experience) it's tampons and facial wipes. I always had a good stock of both, because I'm annoying like that.

Someone in school was stealing from my stock of valuables and in the space of a month at least half of my wipes and tampons had disappeared, along with some AA batteries and a Nokia cellphone charger. I caught the culprit by accident one day and she tried to brush it off by saying she was only 'borrowing' the items and tried to push me out of the way to get out of the room with my stuff in her hands, assuming - as many do - that because I'm small that I'm easily pushed around. A mistake. This one had been annoying me with low-level bullying for some time, and I saw red.

I wrenched the contraband from her hands, and tried to kick her ass as she whirled around, she pushed me and I fell, then as she tried to escape I grabbed her ankle and took that thieving brat down hard. Our house mistress arrived on the scene, put two and two together and gave her a weeks detention, and I got a reprimand for fighting (but she obviously didn't mean it). The would-be master thief learned the most valuable lesson of her life; you don't wrestle with four foot eleven-and-a-half inches of pure Candie badassery and get away with it.

That story is so exciting I should probably write a screenplay.

No, I've never been in a fight in my adult life.

circadian

Plenty of times at school as it was par for the course. Won most of them, which in a way sets you up for more as people want to have a go.

Never instigated as I was too laid back but you got the occasional idiot who got egged on by his mates to throw some punches.

A few as adult, got jumped a couple of times and made it out with black eyes but nothing more serious. The times where it was 1v1 was usually someone in an awful state starting it and easy enough dealt with. I've been lucky considering I've had a few altercations but none in a long time thankfully.

1/10 would not recommend, terrible feeling after a fight.

Neon_Lights

me_irl wrote: »

*shouts from sideline*


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH! SCRAP SCRAP SCRAP SCRAP SCRAP!

(Personally no, and I don't intend to)

Pu55y

RoboRat

I spar 3 times a week, does that count?

I did get hopped one night when I was out by 5 blokes after trying to help a girl who I went to school with - 3 lads and 2 girls were kicking her on the ground. Busted my nose and a fair bit of bruising but nothing major... got her out safely which was what mattered.

Ironically about 3 years later whilst in work I saw one of the assailants working behind the hot counter in the cafeteria. I walked up when it was quiet and asked him if he remembered me, obviously he didn't so I reminded him that I was the bloke he and his mates kicked the **** out of 3 years ago... he went white so I smiled and said that I wasn't going to say anything followed by... 'now go make me a sandwich like a good boy'... needless to say, I didn't order anything else from him, didn't want some pubes in my sandwich. I felt immensely satisfied with that comment though.

Subcomandante Marcos

I've boxed and done Okinawan karate as a kid, I now practice Brazilian jiu-jitsu and train a bit of kick boxing. I've been in a few competitive fights.

Also been in the usual young lads beating lumps out of eachother scraps as a kid too.

In later years it's generally been avoided.

barney shamrock

Never been in a fight, not even at school.
I'm 51 now so chances are I won't be in a scrap anytime soon.
I wouldn't hesitate to use force to protect my family if required though.

Mean Laqueefa

barney shamrock wrote: »

Never been in a fight, not even at school.
I'm 51 now so chances are I won't be in a scrap anytime soon.
I wouldn't hesitate to use force to protect my family if required though.

LordSutch

joe stodge wrote: »

well have you?
did you win?

Oh yes, but only of the verbal variety with the missus, and she always wins

Don't argue with me or else? or else what?
Or else no "cuddles" for a year!

OK you win.

branie2

Nope

blackdog2

Life
is a daily fight
just get through

Junkyard Tom

The best way to avoid injury in a fight is to run away really fast before it begins.

retro:electro

No but I remember being about 16 and at one of the local discos. A group of girls came from a "rival" school and they were all standing around trying to intimidate a lot of girls. I was walking into a bathroom cubicle and one of the girls grabbed my hair and pulled me down to the ground. For some reason I thought she was joking so bizarrely my initial reaction was to burst out laughing. I think she thought I was a bit special so she just released her grip and left me alone.

I've never laid a hand on anyone in my life but have been tempted to deck someone in the face many a time.

Four Phucs Ache

Once with 2 pr1cks.

There was a shortcut through an old yard leading onto a housing estate.

It always had monster dogs that would look at you passing the gates.The look warned most from entering.The shortcut through the yard would cut 10mins off my journey.

I couldn't see the dogs today and 14yo me thought if I leg it, I should make it.

I climb the gate and land inside.Its about 100 feet to the estate wall.

I take a few pensive steps to get a feel for the place and I'm now 30 feet in.

Looking left and right, nothing.

50 feet in, halfway.

60 feet, relax.

70 feet, look behind.

71 feet.Oh balls.

Alsations are lovely dogs.This one was called kreuger according to everybody, after Freddy kreuger fame.

Kreuger was about 10 feet from me.Staring.Fooker silently followed me from the gate.

I didnt know what to do so for some reason I said calm now boy, calm.

Kreuger started to growl.

Dobermans are lovely dogs.I never knew this ones name so let's call him fear.

Fear was sprinting from the left.I literally sh!t myself on the spot and they new it.

Kreuger advanced and both dogs where in full flight.

So I'm now spinning around with a 50 kilo alsation hanging off my arm and while spinning the weight of kreuger tore the sleeve of my new xworx jacket.He landed with a yelp and continued to eat the sleeve.

Fear was straight in.As he was mid leap for my neck I put my other arm out.

While spinning around with 50 kilos of fear on my left arm, it also got torn off.Fear went flying into kreuger and both yelped.

No sleeves left.

I fookin legged it.Didnt look back.I was on top of the wall and over in seconds.

I looked back over and their​ playing tug of war with one sleeve yet they have two ffs.

MadDog76

More than I care to remember ......... I just hope my last one was my last one!

markc1184

I'm not really one for fighting but have been in a few. One in primary school which wasn't really a fight. I got a sucker punch from a traveller and ended up with a broken jaw. 2 in secondary school which were even enough until they were broken up. Another then when I got jumped by 3 scrawny whippets as I walked out of a nightclub. They thought I was an easy target by myself but I was just walking ahead of a group of mates that had stopped at the cloakroom. They regretted it afterwards.

dd972

Always get the feeling that people in their 30's or 40's who've never been in a fight must have grown up in Castleknock or Monkstown and be imbued with that middle class confidence created by agency over your life and not being hemmed in by your surroundings, I'm completely passive and unaggressive and never wanted to fight anybody but have had at least 10 fights and feel like a 'pussy' about letting people off the hook when they deserved a clout but didn't get one.

Burial.

I used to box at a pretty high level when I was younger so been in loads of proper fights so to speak and as many outside the ring too although haven't been in one in quite a while. Most recent one was a few years back...standard scumbag starts a fight outside the nightclub, a friend throws a punch back protecting himself before he gets jumped by all ya man's friends. We pelt ot across the street to help him as he'd getting his head kicked in. I knocked two of them out cold before getting tackled to the ground and getting the **** bate out of me before a mix of friends and security come to save me. Ended up with a broken nose and a huge deep cut by me eye as well as a split lip and brushes all over my body. Pales in comparison to my friend who fractured his skull. Nearly lost my job as well as a job I was going for due to the shades getting involved. We were nearly thrown out of college as well. Thankfully haven't had to jump in a fight like that since.

PowerToWait

Been in many scraps, some fairly hairy and have had to go to hospital twice.

I've not been in any since out of my teens. Many people will look askance at you if you admit to having been in any such situations. You're pegged as an oik.

I honestly couldn't have avoided any of the rows I was involved in, it was a almost a right of passage, and I'll admit, I sometimes found it exhillirating.

I actually find it odd that so many seem to have gone through life without having had to defend themselves from violence.

PowerToWait

dd972 wrote: »

Always get the feeling that people in their 30's or 40's who've never been in a fight must have grown up in Castleknock or Monkstown and be imbued with that middle class confidence created by agency over your life and not being hemmed in by your surroundings, I'm completely passive and unaggressive and never wanted to fight anybody but have had at least 10 fights and feel like a 'pussy' about letting people off the hook when they deserved a clout but didn't get one.

Have just seen this. Eloquently put.

Beanntraigheach

Indeed I have, just last night as it happens.

I was relaxing in the sitting room watching television (a rather fascinating documentary on the mating habits of the great apes) when Grandad comes zimmer-framing out of his room: "Would you keep the sound down, I'm trying to sleep".
"You'd wan't to keep yer feckin' mouth shut, ye scabby aul' bollix ye!" I roars back at him.
But no, he starts flapping his gums off again, so quick as a whip I spring up off the couch and biff! baff! boff! leave him out cold on the floor.
He made some feeble attempts to defend himself but was no match for me! I can't say I came through entirely unscathed however - I cut one of my knuckles on his glasses.

It's probably wrong of me to say, but I must admit to feeling a wonderful sense of accomplishment afterwards as I settled down to resume my documentary.
Like a victorious hero of yore, returned from the fray to the comforts of home, his wounds a testament to his valour.
It was glorious.

razorblunt

Got jumped once, punched my way out with a few bruises.

Plenty of handbags in rugby games, punches rarely land you'd swing and hope teammates were arriving or if he was getting the better, tackle him to the floor. Once in a semi final myself and a giant from the other team were wrestling at the back of the ruck. We thought the teammates would pile in, but there was 10 mins left and they were all concentrating on the game. We had to sheepishly walk off after getting sent off, black eyes, torn collars and coaches shouting at us. His Mam gave me awful abuse walking into the club house. We both burst out laughing. I'd say we were lucky not to catch colds from the wind of all the missed punches.

HalloweenJack

A lot. Been a while since I've been in one, thankfully.

I was a hot-headed prick when I was younger, especially with a few drinks in me. I'm glad I've calmed down.

Avatar MIA

First year living in Limerick, my girlfriend and I were on the way to college and we walked around a building and an oldish guy walked in between us brushing off me. We both looked at each other and he threw a slap and ran off and my (always the more sensible) girlfriend held me back.

I saw the same lad around Limerick for a few years afterwards, a homeless guy. Felt more sorry for him than anything. Haven't seen him in years, but it was my introduction to Limerick. Haven't had a sniff of trouble since though.

Galwayguy35

No never hit anyone but I was nutted by someone years ago, wrong place at the wrong time I suppose and when it happened there wasn't much I could do about it.

Roger Hassenforder

razorblunt wrote: »

Plenty of handbags in rugby games, punches rarely land you'd swing and hope teammates were arriving or if he was getting the better, tackle him to the floor.

Don't know why, but my biggest memory of a "fight" in rugby was in a match years ago V Boyne. A Donnybrook was on the cusp of erupting when one of our lads threw a slap over some transgression, to get in the biggest Louth/Meath accent
"Hee-yor why ya hittin me hai, I've wuk in de mornin"
Play was stopped for a few minutes from laughter *

*you might have had to be there

Mark25

HalloweenJack wrote: »

A lot. Been a while since I've been in one, thankfully.

I was a hot-headed prick when I was younger, especially with a few drinks in me. I'm glad I've calmed down.

That's like me X 10.

Got into a fair few fights at secondary school - all boys and rough enough so there would be fights most days. Won some and lost some. Ended up in hospital after one - definitely lost that one and got suspended from school over that and got a few slaps at home too.

Then took up boxing for a while and didn't get into many fights. I enjoyed it but gave it up around 18 when I left school and started college and was doing a part time job and drinking. As somebody once said - drink doesn't agree with me it brings me out in handcuffs. I probably got arrested 10 times for public order, criminal damage and assault. If you knew me then I was a right scumbag. I got a good few chances in court - fines, community service, suspended sentence and eventually 2 years in prison.

That one was for a bad assault. I remember being interviewed for that and seeing the CCTV and I hated myself and what I had done. Seeing it after a night in a cell and when you are sober is very different.

Being in prison was rough for me and my family but off the drink i was an OK guy. I did AA and anger management when I was inside and that did help. I think for me the shame of prison, getting off the drink, having a son and getting older meant I was a different person when i came out and glad to say i haven't been in a proper fight since. I've come close but walked away and have said stupid things but nothing physical.

But being the way i was messed up my 20s. Since getting out I got a chance to go back to collefe as amature student and amnow in my final year of a degree and working part time and not really drinking. I know mine is an extreme case but hopefully I'll not get into another fight again because I know what can happen.-