Looking for thoughts/experiences

VandC

Hi All,

Bit of a strange one, and I suppose ultimately I'm hoping to be considerate of the 2 y/o feelings and mitigate against potential upset/jealousy/territorial issues.

So at the moment the 2 y/o (2 years and 3 months just to give you a better idea of where she is at) is in her own room in a cot. There is another bedroom that I want to move the 8 m/o in to as she is currently in my room. Over the next few months I want to do up the room that the baby will be in, but do it up for the 2 y/o – with a view to moving her in to a bed at this point and then move the baby in to the room the 2 y/o is currently in. Basically, it’ll just be for convenience, as the room the toddler is in is done up for a baby and the cotbed can then be the baby’s and the new room will be child friendly.

What I’m worried about is that although the room will be done up with the toddler in mind, and she is getting the bigger room, big person bed etc etc that she won’t see it like that. I’m afraid that she’ll feel put out of her room and that she will become territorial and jealous of the baby – at the moment she loves the baby and I would love for it to stay that way (they obv have their moments ) – partly because I don’t know if she’s at the stage to understand and if she will feel that the nursery is “her” room.

What are other people’s thoughts/experiences etc? I want this to be a happy move for the toddler from the box room nursery with cot to the big room with bed, but ultimately I’m not closed to the idea of keeping her in the smaller room and changing the bed if that is what will be best for her.

Thanks in advance.

ncmc

I think you’re probably over thinking it a bit to be honest. If she so far has shown herself to be accepting of the baby and not jealous, then I doubt this will put her over the edge! The baby is 8 months so your daughter doesn’t remember life without him. If you are worried, you could move her into the big room first and then leave a gap of a few weeks before moving the baby in to her old room. That way it’ll feel less like she’s being ‘kicked out’

Just make a big fuss of the new room, maybe let her help pick colours, furniture, bed covers etc. She’ll love being involved and it will make her feel special. Good luck, it’s great that you’re being so considerate of her, I’m sure she’ll be just fine.

painauchocolat

We did exactly this (toddler moved from cot in small room to bed in big room; baby moved from our room to vacated cot). I DEFINITELY overthought it, but I reckon there's no harm in that

We spent a good while gathering bits for the toddler's new room (duvet cover, stickers for walls, lampshade etc) then did the room all in one afternoon, letting her help with the stickers. Explained loads of times that this would be her big girl room. Didn't move her in though! Let her play in there, snuggle in the bed and start taking her naps there, but didn't let her "move" in properly for a couple of weeks until she was begging to be let spend the night there!

Once she was well settled, we moved the baby - couple of weeks later. Similar procedure: baby started taking naps in the cot, toddler could see this happening and we chatted about how the baby would be able to use this room now that toddler was in her big girl room.

Took a month, I went way overboard ensuring no noses would be out of joint, but it did work!

pwurple

I think they are oblivious at that age.

We moved our eldest about six times before she was three. We were moving house a lot.

Then, when we had two children, we renovated and both of them moved another few times to various family members. Then, back home, and moved twice more as we painted the rooms. Had to upend again when we lost power after the storms for 9 days. Shared, not shared, in with us for a week. Didn’t make a tap of difference.

Never gave them an option or choice, that was just the way it is.

The bit they cared about for consistency remained constant. Here is your bed, toothbrushing, story, and mammy and daddy there to kiss goodnight.

It’s only an issue if you make it into one.

shesty

Depends on your child I suppose.I think if you include her in the decorating and chosing things for it, and discuss it with her, maybe draw some pictures of what she might like in it, I think she would be fine with it by the end of it all.
My older girl, I would have to take an approach like that.She understands more than she should for her years and things need to be well flagged and discussed in advance.Even though I know she'll generally be fine once something is done.

VandC

Thanks for all the feedback. Sounds like it's more me that needs to chill I'll get her involved somehow, prob the best. I think she'll like getting a new bed so could be a start getting her involved in that. And sure who doesn't like testing out new beds!