Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all! We have been experiencing an issue on site where threads have been missing the latest postings. The platform host Vanilla are working on this issue. A workaround that has been used by some is to navigate back from 1 to 10+ pages to re-sync the thread and this will then show the latest posts. Thanks, Mike.
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

How often do ye rattle the wife

2»

Comments

  • #52
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,750 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    archer22 wrote: »
    You ruin the field doing that...ploughing comes before the harrowing...as any good (and some bad) farmers could tell you :cool:

    Well spotted.... well spotted.

    I’m afraid they don’t react too well to that kind of expression.

    I used to refer to foreplay as getting the lass ‘shovel ready’.

    Didn’t go down well.


  • #53
    Dr Crayfish
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,960 ✭✭✭Dr Crayfish


    The only place you'll get honesty about sexless marriages, which seems to be most of them, is anonymously in the relationship issues forum


  • #54
    Purple Mountain
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,308 ✭✭✭✭Purple Mountain


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Every night unless sick

    After Luke goes to sleep.

    To thine own self be true



  • #55
    Dakota Dan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,772 ✭✭✭Dakota Dan


    Avatar MIA wrote: »
    Santa, that you?

    Santa has to empty his sac now and then.


  • #56
    Avatar MIA
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,750 ✭✭✭Avatar MIA


    Dakota Dan wrote: »
    Santa has to empty his sac now and then.

    Must be a heavy sac after 364 days, leap year's must feel like a cruel joke - the rumours of Mrs Clause and the elves can't make it any easier. :pac:


  • #57
    Rumpy Pumpy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,048 ✭✭✭Rumpy Pumpy


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Hmmmm, I tried “I’d have you wet as an otters pocket” and only got four responses.

    Not sure if they respond to that stuff.

    Did you get to have a ‘fish supper’ at ‘granny’s oyster bar’?

    :confused:


  • #58
    Hector Bellend
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,667 ✭✭✭Hector Bellend


    It's become something of christmas tradition to have a really good ride on christmas morning.

    I'll give her a proper good boning first thing in the morning.

    We'll go back to bed for a couple of hours and then I'll try shafting her again in the shower.


  • #59
    Fann Linn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,821 ✭✭✭Fann Linn


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Well spotted.... well spotted.

    I’m afraid they don’t react too well to that kind of expression.

    I used to refer to foreplay as getting the lass ‘shovel ready’.

    Didn’t go down well.

    Thats your problem....'Didn't go down well.'


  • #60
    PeterParker957
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,177 ✭✭✭PeterParker957


    Hector Bellend wrote: »
    It's become something of christmas tradition to have a really good ride on christmas morning.

    I'll give her a proper good boning first thing in the morning.

    We'll go back to bed for a couple of hours and then I'll try shafting her again in the shower.

    Ah I love Jane Austen!!!


  • Advertisement
  • #61
    fergus1001
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,625 ✭✭✭fergus1001


    Gigidy gigidy goo


  • #62
    SuperSean11
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,555 ✭✭✭SuperSean11


    lanomist wrote: »
    About once a year, but the good thing is TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT.

    How'd it go?


  • #63
    Barncom
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 11 ✭Barncom


    I'm challenging myself this year to not ejaculate in 2018, so far so good, was tempted a couple times however.


  • #64
    Avatar MIA
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,750 ✭✭✭Avatar MIA


    Barncom wrote: »
    I'm challenging myself this year to not ejaculate in 2018, so far so good, was tempted a couple times however.

    Unless you're a female or a prepubescent male this, i think, will be impossible with a high likelihood of a "wet dream".


  • #65
    Barncom
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 11 ✭Barncom


    Avatar MIA wrote: »
    Unless you're a female or a prepubescent male this, i think, will be impossible with a high likelihood of a "wet dream".

    I'm 33, I'll give myself a pass if that happens, but don't think I've ever had a wet dream im my life.


  • #66
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,750 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Barncom wrote: »
    I'm challenging myself this year to not ejaculate in 2018, so far so good, was tempted a couple times however.

    Bad for your bag, bro.

    Need to tip cement now and again, or she'll clog the pipes.


  • Advertisement
  • #67
    Rumpy Pumpy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,048 ✭✭✭Rumpy Pumpy


    Barncom wrote: »
    I'm challenging myself this year to not ejaculate in 2018, so far so good, was tempted a couple times however.

    Not even if Fr. Seamus Marmody gives you a reacharound?


  • #68
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,750 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Rumpy Pumpy wrote: »
    Not even if Fr. Seamus Marmody gives you a reacharound?

    Lad would't hold out against that Rumpy,sack would spit like a taximan on Aston Quay..

    Never hold out there.


  • #69
    Reati
    Registered Users Posts: 1,926 ✭✭✭Reati


    Barncom wrote: »
    I'm challenging myself this year to not ejaculate in 2018, so far so good, was tempted a couple times however.

    Never got that nofap crap. You only live once lads, rip the stomach outta your self every second you can. Might get hit by a bus tomorrow.


  • #70
    Rumpy Pumpy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,048 ✭✭✭Rumpy Pumpy


    Reati wrote: »
    Never got that nofap crap. You only live once lads, rip the stomach outta your self every second you can. Might get hit by a bus tomorrow.

    He might have an addiction to trying to pull the skeleton out of himself though? Going at himself like he’s starting a petrol lawnmower after a cold winter.

    :confused:


  • #71
    Reati
    Registered Users Posts: 1,926 ✭✭✭Reati


    Rumpy Pumpy wrote: »
    He might have an addiction to trying to pull the skeleton out of himself though? Going at himself like he’s starting a petrol lawnmower after a cold winter.

    :confused:

    Shur more power to him. He's not going to pull it off like. The practice will do him good when he nerds to start a lawnmower in the spring.


  • Advertisement
  • #72
    KellyXX
    Registered Users Posts: 365 ✭✭KellyXX


    Is this thread men only?
    I came in to post about the frequency of my own rattle but I'm scared now :)


  • #73
    Barncom
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 11 ✭Barncom


    Reati wrote: »
    Never got that nofap crap. You only live once lads, rip the stomach outta your self every second you can. Might get hit by a bus tomorrow.

    Exactly, only live once so want to feel energetic and full of life. **** routinely and too much sex kills that drive in me.


  • #74
    Dakota Dan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,772 ✭✭✭Dakota Dan


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Bad for your bag, bro.

    Need to tip cement now and again, or she'll clog the pipes.

    Not dumping your load is great for hair though.


  • #75
    Raven_k42
    Registered Users Posts: 358 ✭✭Raven_k42


    RayM wrote: »
    Avatar MIA wrote: »
    Listen, I'll be ploughing what you've harrowed!

    The phrase "like throwing a cocktail sausage down O'Connell Street" springs to mind.

    "........on a wet day" to properly complete the saying (well that's how I always knew it).

    K


  • #76
    Barncom
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 11 ✭Barncom


    Dakota Dan wrote: »
    Not dumping your load is great for hair though.

    Yea apparently when you ejaculate prolactin levels raise which does something to DHT or PGD2 which causes baldness. Can't remember exact details.


  • #77
    Reati
    Registered Users Posts: 1,926 ✭✭✭Reati


    KellyXX wrote: »
    Is this thread men only?
    I came in to post about the frequency of my own rattle but I'm scared now :)

    No, but you do need to be rattling your or someone else's wife.


  • #78
    Reati
    Registered Users Posts: 1,926 ✭✭✭Reati


    Barncom wrote: »
    Exactly, only live once so want to feel energetic and full of life. **** routinely and too much sex kills that drive in me.

    Jaysus you must have some serious **** sessions if that kills any drive in you.


  • #79
    Barncom
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 11 ✭Barncom


    Reati wrote: »
    Jaysus you must have some serious **** sessions if that kills any drive in you.

    I wouldn't say anything out of the ordinary, but definitely feel much better since I stopped a couple weeks ago.


  • #80
    Rumpy Pumpy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,048 ✭✭✭Rumpy Pumpy


    Barncom wrote: »
    I wouldn't say anything out of the ordinary, but definitely feel much better since I stopped a couple weeks ago.

    Be careful you don’t get a case of blue balls.


  • #81
    XsApollo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,495 ✭✭✭XsApollo


    Well it is pretty much agreed that if you abstain from pulling the plod off yourself you tend to be happier and have more energy and more drive.


    Edit:
    Not that I have had any success in that matter.


  • Advertisement
  • #82
    Reati
    Registered Users Posts: 1,926 ✭✭✭Reati


    XsApollo wrote: »
    Well it is pretty much agreed that if you abstain from pulling the plod off yourself you tend to be happier and have more energy and more drive.


    Edit:
    Not that I have had any success in that matter.

    Would love to see the data that backs that?


  • #83
    poo poo
    Registered Users Posts: 68 ✭✭poo poo


    I have no-one to rattle :(


  • #84
    kerryjack
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,580 ✭✭✭kerryjack


    Barncom wrote: »
    I'm challenging myself this year to not ejaculate in 2018, so far so good, was tempted a couple times however.

    I wouldn't do that,the priests deprived themselves for years and look how fucooked up they are now, its completely natural and a sign of good health, the day I don't wake up with a horn is the day I will go and see a doctor.


Advertisement