New borns and gigs

the_sonandmoon

iamwhoiam wrote:

Thanks for the answer . Well I disagree about the under 4 month old needing only its mother as a loving grandparent is a huge bonus to any age . Unless you can proove that the baby who stays only with his mother has any benefit above the one who occasionally is hugged by a grandparent ?

Sorry, perhaps I'm not explaining myself very well.

Of course babies should be held, hugged, etc by other family members, especially dad.

4th trimester parenting isn't about keeping the baby away from others, just easing its transition into the world by keeping it close to mamma most of the time. But there's always a place for a hug from grandad!

NIMAN

KellyXX wrote: »

Maybe it's just me, but I'll say it.
I would consider that child abuse.
Your baby is 6 weeks old. Still very fragile. Imagine the stress on being at a concert for a six week old. Nuts.

Child abuse is maybe stretching it a bit, but to be honest when I read this thread I thought it had to be some sort of wind-up.

If its genuine, accept that you have a young baby OP, get over it and forget about the concert. It should be way down your list of priorities.

endacl

Not an outdoor gig, where people would be smoking. I'd say it'd be grand in the likes of Vicar St. where you could just pop the nipper into the cloakroom?

the_sonandmoon

NIMAN wrote:

If its genuine, accept that you have a young baby OP, get over it and forget about the concert. It should be way down your list of priorities.

Yep, as you've probably seen from my posts all morning, I've accepted over and over that I won't be going, due to the fact that I won't be able to ensure against damage to the baby's hearing.

Can you give me an idea if what my priorities should be? Other than keeping baby safe, warm, fed, clean, loved, all of which would have been covered.

xalot

To those giving the op grief - please get some perspective. She was just considering something and asked for advice, when she got lots of different opinions (mostly sensible) she realised that it wasn't the most practical or safe idea.

I always thought of this as a forum to come to for advice and guidance. It's possible to make somebody aware of possible dangers without calling social welfare!

Pregnancy and motherhood are hard enough without all the bloody judgement.

iamwhoiam

the_sonandmoon wrote: »

Sorry, perhaps I'm not explaining myself very well.

Of course babies should be held, hugged, etc by other family members, especially dad.

4th trimester parenting isn't about keeping the baby away from others, just easing its transition into the world by keeping it close to mamma most of the time. But there's always a place for a hug from grandad!

Thanks for the reply . ! I am still confused why then the baby cannot be minded while you go out ?

fits

iamwhoiam wrote: »

Thanks for the reply . ! I am still confused why then the baby cannot be minded while you go out ?

I agree with op in that I could not have left the babies for several hours until they were several months old. Two hours max with anyone.

iamwhoiam

fits wrote: »

I agree with op in that I could not have left the babies for several hours until they were several months old. Two hours max with anyone.

I am simply asking why not . What is the benefits ? Are there any proven benefits ? Lets say your toddler needs you more , is in hospital and you leave a newborn with family . Are they at a disadvantage to another who was never left ?

lukesmom

the_sonandmoon wrote: »

Yikes. Ill call the social worker, ask her if I should give up my kids

Okay the social worker will question your ability to provide basic needs to such a young infant.

Warmth
Food
Regular nappy changes
Shelter
Safety

If you can 100% guarantee these needs above being met, then go for it. But I would seriously question your ability to parent adequately if you come to the conclusion that an outdoor concert with a 6 week old is an appropriate situation to be trying to meet these needs.

fits

iamwhoiam wrote: »

I am simply asking why not . What is the benefits ? Are there any proven benefits ? Lets say your toddler needs you more , is in hospital and you leave a newborn with family . Are they at a disadvantage to another who was never left ?

Who said anything about disadvantage. Newborn babies are happiest with Mum. That’s all

lukesmom

iamwhoiam wrote: »

I am simply asking why not . What is the benefits ? Are there any proven benefits ? Lets say your toddler needs you more , is in hospital and you leave a newborn with family . Are they at a disadvantage to another who was never left ?

From a social work prospective, as was mentioned earlier. It is always preferable to have a baby with its mother, so long as its needs will be met. However in this case it would be far more suitable to have the 6 week old baby with an another family member/caregiver who can guarantee his needs being met at home, as opposed to an outdoor concert.

iamwhoiam

fits wrote: »

Who said anything about disadvantage. Newborn babies are happiest with Mum. That’s all

And equally happy for periods with its granny . No one will convince me otherwise .

bee06

iamwhoiam wrote: »

And equally happy for periods with its granny . No one will convince me otherwise .

Considering the baby will be breastfed and 6 weeks is the earliest a breastfed baby would be recommended to be given a bottle, there is no guarantee he/she would take the bottle if left. All the loving grandparents in the world are no use if the baby is screaming for her moms boob for hours.

eviltwin

I went to a gig when my son was about three weeks old. He didn't come. No way would I have coped with him there, it was to noisy, crowded and I was tired enough due to sleepless nights to be worrying about nappies and feeding. You won't enjoy it with a baby to care for and I agree it's not a suitable environment for a new baby. If you really want to go I'd go and get a babysitter.

iamwhoiam

bee06 wrote: »

Considering the baby will be breastfed and 6 weeks is the earliest a breastfed baby would be recommended to be given a bottle, there is no guarantee he/she would take the bottle if left. All the loving grandparents in the world are no use if the baby is screaming for her moms boob for hours.

The conversation was about babies until 3-4 months being happiest with the mother .And if the baby is six weeks old and breast fed and best with the mother then fine but that not at a gig in my opinion .

ZiggyBean

No real advice to be given here, to each there own and all that. I personally wouldn't bring a small baby to a concert. But then I dealt with my 6 week old a little differently to most due to a traumatic birth.

I'm mainly curious as to what the gig is that has you even considering bringing the baba along?? Someone likely not to be here again??

the_syco

the_sonandmoon wrote: »

I can't imagine, even at a gig, that somebody would be so drunk that they would push against me so hard that it could hurt a baby snuggled right in on top of me in a sling.

Intentionally, no. But if they tripped, and and fell on top of you whilst you were walking, baby would probably suffer injuries.Heck, add a bot of rain, and the chance of someone slipping and knocking into you would probably increase.

Also, the noise would probably damage the babies hearing; but you won't realize the damage until a few years later.

fits

Yeah I couldn’t imagine going to a gig at six weeks. Either with a baby or without. But I didn’t leave my twins for longer than two hours until they were eight months!

XsApollo

Bring a 6 week old baby to a stadium gig?
How are you even contemplating it never mind actually questioning it if you can?
Madness.

the_syco

Also the child won't have any of it's vaccinations, so if it comes in contact with any feral unvaccinated people, it could get a serious illness and die.

waterfaerie

iamwhoiam wrote: »

I am simply asking why not . What is the benefits ? Are there any proven benefits ? Lets say your toddler needs you more , is in hospital and you leave a newborn with family . Are they at a disadvantage to another who was never left ?

I think you're overdoing it pushing this so much. There are many different parenting styles and the OP is entitled to have a different one to you. They have explained their point and don't need to justify it any further.

If you want to know the "proven benefits", of which I can assure you there are many, then why don't you google attachment parenting and find that out for yourself?

The original question was about the gig. The OP has decided not to go as they know their baby is better off with them. The other posters accusing the OP of being selfish are out of order. I follow a similar parenting style to the OP and I would view leaving a 6 week old baby with someone else in order to attend a gig as selfish. The OP was looking for information, found it and decided not to go because they wouldn't leave their baby. Selfish is the last thing I would call them.

waterfaerie

iamwhoiam wrote: »

And equally happy for periods with its granny . No one will convince me otherwise .

I take it you're the granny...

waterfaerie

iamwhoiam wrote: »

The conversation was about babies until 3-4 months being happiest with the mother .

I thought the conversation was about attending a concert?

salmocab

I was at a big rugby match in the Aviva last year and a couple came in with a baby a few weeks old, they weren’t sitting together she was a row behind him and a few seats to the side with the baby as he sat quite chivalrousaly I thought with his friends. Anyway there was a spare seat with his friends so there was a big deal made of moving with drink bag and baby passed forward as she mooched out to the aisle and back in, whilst he proclaims to everyone around ‘who would have thought bringing a baby to a match would be so much hassle’ I had to stop myself saying well I would have you knob. I know it’s not exactly the same but still far too much hassle.

I think you'd be very noticeably shunned by fellow attendees anyway. Ridiculous idea. Glad you came to your senses.

the_sonandmoon

I'm sure you will be glad to know that, when I mentioned the gig to my husband, he told me there was no way that we could go with such a tiny baby. I just got excited when I heard that James Taylor was supporting Paul Simon, and was trying to convince myself that it could happen.

At least our babies will have one unselfish parent in their daddy.

iamwhoiam

waterfaerie wrote: »

I think you're overdoing it pushing this so much. There are many different parenting styles and the OP is entitled to have a different one to you. They have explained their point and don't need to justify it any further.

If you want to know the "proven benefits", of which I can assure you there are many, then why don't you google attachment parenting and find that out for yourself?

The original question was about the gig. The OP has decided not to go as they know their baby is better off with them. The other posters accusing the OP of being selfish are out of order. I follow a similar parenting style to the OP and I would view leaving a 6 week old baby with someone else in order to attend a gig as selfish. The OP was looking for information, found it and decided not to go because they wouldn't leave their baby. Selfish is the last thing I would call them.

Look at some of the replies to the OP and then you decide to pick on my posts ?
Yes i know what the original post was and it meandered into another conversation . I asked about the " fourth trimester " and the OP politely answered my query . It was a polite conversation . I will certainly google it too thank you

iamwhoiam

the_sonandmoon wrote: »

I'm sure you will be glad to know that, when I mentioned the gig to my husband, he told me there was no way that we could go with such a tiny baby. I just got excited when I heard that James Taylor was supporting Paul Simon, and was trying to convince myself that it could happen.

At least our babies will have one unselfish parent in their daddy.

Aw . James Taylor and Paul Simon in one pot ! What a gig that will be ! Maybe baba would be ok for once with a nana or auntie ? Its not like its every day , its only one occasion ? I am sure he will be ok just the one time

The Infinite Fart

Aw! Sounds like a cool gig... Know that feeling...had tickets to Coldplay last summer and was definitely touch and go whether we could go or not. Baby arrived just under 3 weeks before and we said we'd go ourselves. Left wee one at home with granny and grandad and she was happy out. Was a lovely night of celebrating how happy we were after her safe arrival and we were all the better for it, even though of course we missed her like mad. You could always get tickets and decide closer to the time if ye want to go yourselves. See what suits! Each to their own and all that...

straighttohell

Yes, you would be nuts to bring a 6 week or a 6 month old to any gig. Baby arrives things change. The worst advice a mother told me was 'just bring them whereever you're going, it's great'. It's not right for a whole load of reasons....