Sleeping

bot43

I have an almost 3 year old. He slept great up until recently, but all of a sudden he wakes at 4.15 almost on the button every morning after not going to bed until almost 9.

I have left my ipad in with him so he can watch that when he wakes up and so he doesnt wake us too early but instead he just wants one of us to come in and watch with him, or bring him into bed with us.

We are both knackered and do not know what to try next. Any ideas?

ShiverinEskimo

Have you tried dozol? Really knocks them out for the night. Everyone wins.

bot43

Someone had mentioned that to me but I am unsure about pumping chemicals into him at such a young age.

bee06

bot43 wrote: »

Someone had mentioned that to me but I am unsure about pumping chemicals into him at such a young age.

Dozol isn’t recommended for routine use. It’s for when the child is sick and can’t sleep as a result.

http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/medicines/aches-and-pains/a7986/dozol-paracetamol-and-diphenhydramine/

ShiverinEskimo

Be grand. Those recommendations err on the side of caution thanks to the modern litigation culture and a prevalence of over-cautious parenting.

big syke

I don't think leaving an iPad with a child is the best thing to do.

Kids need to learn to sooth themselves back to sleep not rely on an ipad.

Do they watch much Television before bed? Do they watch the iPad or TV once they wake in the mornings?

What is there routine like for the day/evening?

bee06

ShiverinEskimo wrote: »

Be grand. Those recommendations err on the side of caution thanks to the modern litigation culture and a prevalence of over-cautious parenting.

Each to their own but I don’t take sleeping pills when I can’t sleep and I wouldn’t medicate my child when they aren’t either. Better to deal with the reason behind it.

bot43

big syke wrote: »

I don't think leaving an iPad with a child is the best thing to do.

Kids need to learn to sooth themselves back to sleep not rely on an ipad.

Do they watch much Television before bed? Do they watch the iPad or TV once they wake in the mornings?

What is there routine like for the day/evening?

We are all home about 6. Bedtime is usually slated for 8pm. Usually play around for a bit, there is some TV some nights, only TV others, none others. There is no fixed routine as such. I find osmetimes if he doesnt want a story that he will be quite happy to watch paw patrol or peppa or the likes instead.

As I mentioned we have started leaving the ipad in the cot so he can play with that when he wakes at that hour. So far not so good.

big syke

ShiverinEskimo wrote: »

Be grand. Those recommendations err on the side of caution thanks to the modern litigation culture and a prevalence of over-cautious parenting.

Its not about erring on the side of caution.

You are suggesting long term use of diphenhydramine and paracetamol.

Short-term memory problems , reasoning, and confusion, drowsiness, urine retention, liver failure and constipation are some of the long term issues that can happen.

The only "modern culture" thing is over medicating.

bee06

bot43 wrote: »

We are all home about 6. Bedtime is usually slated for 8pm. Usually play around for a bit, there is some TV some nights, only TV others, none others. There is no fixed routine as such. I find osmetimes if he doesnt want a story that he will be quite happy to watch paw patrol or peppa or the likes instead.

As I mentioned we have started leaving the ipad in the cot so he can play with that when he wakes at that hour. So far not so good.

I’d start by implementing a bedtime routine, no TV an hour before bed. Get a Gro clock and get rid of the iPad.

big syke

bot43 wrote: »

We are all home about 6. Bedtime is usually slated for 8pm. Usually play around for a bit, there is some TV some nights, only TV others, none others. There is no fixed routine as such. I find osmetimes if he doesnt want a story that he will be quite happy to watch paw patrol or peppa or the likes instead.

As I mentioned we have started leaving the ipad in the cot so he can play with that when he wakes at that hour. So far not so good.

Set a routine and stick to it. Kids thrive on routine.

E.g. Bath at 7 after a snack, bit of a play, read a story, hugs and kiss goodnight.

Do not leave an iPad out for him its asking for trouble.

If he wakes bring him back to bed and don't interact with him. You will have to repeat this numerous time and over a potentially long period (week+).

It will work eventually.

Mousewar

Yeah routine is key.
Every kid is different but 8pm seems late to be going to bed depending on what time he gets up at (I mean before the difficulties).
My own three year old needs at least 12 hours at night and will often take a 1 hour nap during the day as well. Ours was a difficult sleeper as a baby so we trained him.
The key is that he should not be rewarded when he wakes up. At the moment he is being rewarded with an ipad. That needs to go. Secondary reward is being brought into your bed. That should stop too. The final reward is having your presence in his bedroom. You probably need to do that to avoid him screaming the house down but you should minimise it as much as possible. Very occasionally, my fella will wake like this and I will go into him but I refuse to engage with him. He is told he needs to lie down and be quiet as it's night time. He's not allowed up, he's not allowed to talk. You'll have a long wait with this the first night and probably subsequent nights but eventually when he gets the message that there's no worthwhile reward, he'll go back asleep himself without bothering you.

DavyD_83

More sympathy, than advice.

We are Struggling with our 3.5 year old waking during the night at the moment too.
She wakes, calls us, then says she is scared of sleeping on her own (or any complaint/excuse she can) until I go in, and then won't let me leave. Full blown tantrum, presented like she's terrified when I try.
I di think she was genuinely scared at first, but have discovered that when wife goes in and is stern, she's allowed to leave and daughter goes back to sleep.
So, I'm at least partially responsible based on my own reactions.
We also have 1 yr old, who is now being woken by all of this, and it is having knock on effects on all 4 of us in terms of tiredness and moods in general.

I have no real advice, but am interested in any that is available.
I will try to implement MouseWar's method above, I'll report back with results in a couple of days (I'm sure it won't be a one-night fix)

copeyhagen

bot43 wrote: »

As I mentioned we have started leaving the ipad in the cot so he can play with that when he wakes at that hour. So far not so good.

4 year old in a cot? is he big in the cot? we just moved baby number two (18 months) from cot to ikea expandable bed a few weeks ago, one or two nights of getting out and hes settled in now.

way comfier and hes sleeping better now too.

could be an option? time to put in bed?!

shesty

Get rid of the ipad.How many articles are there out there about blue light, screens and the effect they have on sleep.Would you like to watch the ipad at 4am?He must be like a demon by 9am, is he?!!
His body is just suddenly in the habit of waking at this time, it's a period of light sleep for everyone.You need to encourage that habit to break.As someone else said, groclock (or equivalent) and lots of returning him to his bed to sleep.It's really lousy for you and the OH but it will pay off long term (and I speak from a couple of years of experience on this one).No getting out of bed until the sun is "up' on the clock, and make it clear that's time for sleeping.Nobody in the house will be getting up at that time,make that clear.Everybody is sleeping and that's just how it is.Start small, aim for 6am (I know!) And shift the time on by about 15 mins regularly when things improve.Do it now before the sun starts rising at 4am!!!!!Expect it take a couple of weeks.

Also if he's in a cot maybe consider a bed?unless he's in a cot bed, is it??

And what's his napping situation?if he is still doing big long naps he may suddenly not need them so much and they could possibly be reduced a bit???

beertons

I'd limit the iPad for a start. I might give mine 30 minutes on the iPad, then nothing for days. Change the password frequently, so they can't unlock it themselves. I got both of mine clocks, and said they're not allowed out till 7 at least. Except for a toilet break. Weekends, they get up early, and go into the sitting room. I took a peek in a few times, they were watching match of the day.

MonsieK

We're going through the same thing with our nearly 3 year old son. From 'googling' the issue it seems like it's a stage that they go through as it's quite common for that age. My husband goes into my son's bed whenever he calls him at night. We have a baby so we couldn't let him scream at night cause he'd wake the baby. Like the OP said I think the first night or 2 he was genuinely scared. Maybe it has something to do with their development. Maybe they are scared of sleeping on their own. I don't think saying 'it's night time, be quiet and go to sleep' is a nice approach. How would anyone feel if they woke up in the middle and somebody said that to them. I certainly wouldn't like it just like I don't like sleeping on my own. We're treating it as a stage. Looking at my nieces and nephews I know it'll pass. If getting him into bed means a good night's sleep for all of us then so be it. They are small for only a short time so we might just enjoy the cuddles (or kicks in the face). I sleep with the baby and love it. Each to their own - this is just my opinion.

Best of luck!