Applying for new jobs

LegacyUser

I’ve been in my current role for 14 years and have built up a friendship with my boss. He has been incredibly generous to my family and I and has even helped us out financially ( out of his own pocket) when we got hit with some bad news.

I’ve been unhappy in my job for quite some time and although he knows this, he has encouraged me to stay. He is unhappy himself but has 4 years left to retirement so is happy to stick it out. I’m in my 30’s and eager to make a change so having been looking for another job. I’ve found a job I’m interested in which has a better pay scale and is pensionable, it is also closer to home. How do I tell him I’m planning on going for it or do I? Am I better to see how I prepares after applying for it? I feel I owe it to him to let him know but I know he will be devastated and if I’m unsuccessful in securing this role I don’t want him to treat me differently.

Any ideas folks?

Diziet

The time to have the discussion is if and when you have a job offer, not before. Discussing in advance only makes the working relationship harder.

LegacyUser

Do you think I should have a conversation warning them I’m going for other positions?

The role I want to apply for st the minute asks if they can contact my current employer - i double checked with them and reference checks will be done as part of the preliminary phase. If I tell them they can’t it looks bad and if I tell them they can my current employer will know anyway but I’d imagine won’t be happy that I didn’t tell them.

I’m out on leave at the minute but we talk every single day so I’m also looking at the friendship here as well as the professional relationship

_Brian

Years ago I was in a similar position with a most wonderful employer.

However, you still need to look after yourself and your career. If he’s so close to retirement you very well may find in a few short years some nutjob takes over and it becomes the job from hell. He may even retire a bit early and it could happen sooner.
You could also move to a new job and get that.

Just look at it coldly and judge the merits of each job and the opportunities they offer, choose which one fits best, there are no guarantees in life.

TheBlock

Are you in a position to take over his role when he retires? Could you get yourself into that position in the 4 years he has left? Would this be something both of you could work on and would that make you happier knowing that you have a career path?

Diziet

If they will contact employer as part of preliminary checks (which is not really standard, mostly references are taken up on offer), then I agree,  you should definitely have a chat with your boss. if he is aware you are unhappy, he should understand. And you can of course offer to make any transition as smooth as you possibly can.

dennyk

Most reasonable employers will understand if you don't want them to contact your current employer for a reference; it's a common request, as most people don't want to share the fact that they are job-hunting with their employer for obvious reasons. Insisting on doing so anyway is a red flag; if they don't respect your situation as an interviewee, they probably won't respect you as an employee either.

If you have any co-workers, or former co-workers/managers who now work elsewhere, that you trust, you could consider using them as a reference instead.

If you do get the offer, just make sure to give your current company the required notice as per your contract; that's the notice period they've requested, after all, and it wouldn't be reasonable of them to expect more.