Keeping him back a year - the effects?

Sinead Mc1

So my little boy is in junior enfants and his teacher called me in this morning to discuss his performance. I knew he was struggling with his reading and numbers but I have just found out that the teacher is actually spending more time with him than anyone else and he is definitely struggling more than anyone else in the class.
I am naturally devestated.
He is 6 in July so isn't even tje youngest in the class or anything.
She is still hopeful that things may yet fall into place.
He is a clever little boy. He loves learning about animals and space etc and has a great imagination but can't seem to grasp numbers or reading.
He also finds tasks like putting the right shoes on the right feet difficult but he does have a tendency to be a little lazy so I'm wondering is that all that is...
Anyway his teacher said she will keep an eye. She is hopeful that things will improve and he can carry on into seniors. She said if he continues to struggle we may need to look at extra lessons etc and if that doesn't help there is a possibility he may have to repeat seniors come Sept next year.
Our concern, herself included, is that there is only a year between my son and his younger brother. His brother will be starting juniors this Sept which means if my other little fella does repeat it'll eventually put him in the same class as his younger brother.
His younger brother is 5 in July and it is clear that he is more advanced.
Im so worried about what all this will do to my son's confidence. I would have no hesitation getting him to repeat but the unusual circumstances of putting him in the same class as a younger sibling has me, and his teacher concerned.
He dotes on his bro being younger (even though it is just a year)!!! but I would rather push ahead with him repeating than constantly having him bottom of the class.
Has anyone had similar circumstances? How did repeating effect your child?

Moonbeam

Has he done an assesment of need to rule out any issues like dylexia or dyspraxia?
Finding the root cause could help him catch up.
Could he repeat JI and his brother start school a year later?
2 of my cousins ended up in the same class because one was kept back and it never had an negative impact but one was male the other female.

anndub

My nephew has just been diagnosed with dyslexia at age 17. Also a very clever fellow so he managed to slip through as he excelled at maths etc but only really struggled with written English. Also loved space and geography almost obsessing over both at times. He also struggled with shoe laces and was often put down as lazy as he would take so long to do basic tasks like set a table. It sounds similar so it might be worth getting him assessed before making the decision to hold him back

December2012

Can he do those kumon classes? To help him.on school?

Sinead Mc1

Hi folks. Thanks for all the input.
So, yes, from my own crazy googling Dyslexia is looking extremely likely, although this was not mentioned by his teacher.
I see those who suffer from dyslexia often have hightened interests and knowledge of other things. This morning he was talking about Scorpions. He knew so much about these creatures I couldn't believe it!
He was also late to speak and attended Speech Therepy which is another sign. He is a little awkward when dressing himself, putting on shoes etc also.
I spoke to his teacher since and mentioned Dyslexia. She said she feels it is way to early to worry about this and I see that a child cannot be tested until they are 6.5 years anyway so the plan is to go ahead into Seniors and review Xmas next year. At that stage he will be 6 and a half and I can get the ball rolling if there is no improvement.
I've since looked up excersises we can do at home. I bought some supplies and have been attempting little Maths games with him.
I only see now how bad the situation is.
This morning I was showing him the number 2 and explained 2 means 2 ones, so to speak.
He still wasn't getting it and couldn't point 2 out to me after I had shown him.
Feel so sorry for him..
Raging that I hadn't spotted it earlier.
Homework was a bit of a struggle but he is my first born and I assumed everyone in Juniors finds it that hard.
We are getting over him possibly having to join his brothers class. If needs must..
Children are very resilient and there is a little less than a year between them so I will press that fact if he is upset.
A little worried my excersises are doing more harm than good to him. He is getting frustrated at getting things wrong. I don't want any more damage to his confidence...
December 2012, thank you for advice on the classes. I have never heard of them and I will defo look into them as I feel a professional hand may be better...

tretorn

The younger child is almost five moonbeam so he definitely needs to go to school this year.

Moonbeam

I am surprised that the PHN did not pick it up on his 3 year health check.
The poor thing, try to make it fun.
There are lovely number /letter jigsaws and magnetic letters and numbers and maybe even watching tv shows like Umizoomi might hep
I would probably still bring him to the gp and discuss an assessment of needs.

gabsdot40

It's very difficult to get permission for a child to repeat a year of school. It must be approved by the dept of Education AFAIK.
If I were you I would arrange a meeting with the teacher and the principal to discuss what can be done to support your child.
An assessment of needs is essential. That will make recommendations of what the school should do. Learning support time is important. Age 6 is a bit young for a firm dyslexia diagnosis. But that may come later.
My daughter has dyslexia and a global development delay. She is in 4th class but performs academically at around a 1st class level. She hasn't repeated any classes and the school never suggested she should. Staying with peers in the same age group is so important.
Basically the school is your best friend in this issue. It is their job to educate your child. Make sure they do.

seamus

It's probably already been done in school, but it's worth getting an eye test to rule that out.
Kids are incredibly good at "making do" - in hindsight our daughter needed glasses since she was about 3, but it really only began to manifest in school and then the in-school eye exam picked it up. We had suspected it, but any basic "how many fingers am I holding up", "what colour is that thing over there" tests she was able to bluff her way through because her vision isn't that bad, but bad enough to be an issue for trying to see blackboards and navigate through open spaces.

Lashes28

Moonbeam wrote: »

I am surprised that the PHN did not pick it up on his 3 year health check.
The poor thing, try to make it fun.
There are lovely number /letter jigsaws and magnetic letters and numbers and maybe even watching tv shows like Umizoomi might hep
I would probably still bring him to the gp and discuss an assessment of needs.

Sorry for derailing..but what exactly does other people PHNs do at developmentals? We have never gotten more than weight, height and how are they doing.

shesty

Sinead, ask his teacher are they any things you could do to help with his maths/letters etc.The games may be good, but if he is not able for them, they will leave him frustrated and confused.The teacher might be able to give you some ideas more aimed at specifically helping him out.

Lashes, our PHN does height/weight.She has a book of pictures that she shows them and asks them to tell her the word for what each picture is (animals/clothes/food type stuff).The two year one, she watches them with blocks, asks can they show her their nose/eye/ear etc, where mammy is (point to mammy), that kind of thing.The 3.5 year one, similar language questions, and also "what is your name", "what age are you" "what is your sister's name".As we had our 2 and 3.5 yr together, she wanted to know did the two year old copy the 3.5 yr old, do they draw, does the older do imaginative play.She has a checklist she works down.My kids are quite outgoing (ie....loud!!!!), so a few questions direct at me about did I have any concerns with their speech or anything were generally followed up by her saying "no, I can see there are no issues with that".Many of her questions were answered by simply watching them be distracted during the appointment, like giving them blocks to play with or paper to scribble on to keep them quiet for a minute!!!She did ask do they hug, do they look us in the eye, do they respond to affection, how do they interact with other kids, etc (although that may have been more aimed at the older one).

drunkmonkey

Is it possible he needs glasses.

twowheelsonly

+1 on the eye test.

Our 2nd fella was like this and his eyesight was only picked up on very late. He was also useless at sports as it turned out he has no peripheral vision as well as having poor eyesight in the first place !! (His eye problems weren't even detected until he was about 10 !!)

He's 29 now and doing very well for himself in a management role and is a great organiser, something I put down to having developed great listening skills in school. He had a lot of interests and was a little brainbox and chatterbox as well but practically everything he learned was by listening. His handwriting is still shocking though as he learned to write when he could barely see the page

Dravokivich

Lashes28 wrote: »

Sorry for derailing..but what exactly does other people PHNs do at developmentals? We have never gotten more than weight, height and how are they doing.

Skills with blocks, recognising pictures and their content, word play and basic comprehension.

byhookorbycrook

SEN teacher here;
Test vision and hearing first of all. A child that young cannot reliably be diagnosed with dyslexia- this is best done at 8 years or older. it seems more likely that there might be a touch of dyspraxia to me, so I'd get to an OT to get that counted out or in.

Repeating a class will often do more harm than good, it can impact very badly on a child's self esteem.
Don't over focus on "work" , if the school uses Jolly Phonics, you could download the app and use that- it's fun and children like it-it's multi-sensory too, which is great to help a child learn and retain.

Forget kumon. it's a franchise and isn't particularly helpful in any case. Get him pairing socks, helping set the table- we need two more knives etc. Read to him as much as you can, read for fun, don't get him "sounding out words."Let him see you read. Use nursery rhymes to help him with phonological awareness "Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall, Humpty Dumpty had a big- " and have a look here
http://www.pdst.ie/sites/default/files/Phonological%20Awareness%20Infants.pdf

Above all, keep it fun and if he is getting bored/frustrated, move on. Infants is a two year programme, some children take longer to settle in. I would suggest waiting until this time in senior infants to review what to do next,