Weddings - a terrible day out.

Salvation Tambourine

Nettle Soup wrote: »

Weddings are a real chore. People only pretend to like them.

I don't agree with that at all. I've gone into some weddings expecting it to be a bit of a chore, my girlfriend's colleague's wedding for example. I knew nobody at the wedding and thought I'd be bored out of my tree. However, I talked to people, they talked to me, we had some drinks, we had a dance and in the end it was a fantastic night full of happy people. I've not met or thought of any of them since but that doesn't matter.

Last December I went to a wedding in a small village in Latvia, close to the Russian border. it was in a village hall, the food was very Latvian and not to my taste. Not many people even spoke English but it was brilliant fun.

I've only been to about seven or eight weddings, I'm 28 now and there's going to be more on the horizon but I'm looking forward to each and every one of them because pretty much everyone is in a good mood and ready for a fun night.

My brother's wedding was one of the best nights I've ever had, I didn't want it to end. I've recently got engaged and can't wait to have all my friends and family in one room hopefully having a great time.

But sure I'm only pretending apparently.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

iamwhoiam wrote: »

Exactly . People can be so judgmental of others because they don't enjoy the sane things . I would hate jazz or country music at mine but for heavens sake I am happy for others that they get music that they enjoy . I don't understand the hostility toward tradition or whatever the couple happen to want

The problem though is that some weddings now make huge demands of the guests in terms of time, money and convenience. So really people are entitled to comment if they find those weddings a bit of a trial. I am more than happy for Bob and Sarah to get married in the middle of nowhere and to spend 3 hours being photographed in front of the lake and so on. But if there's pressure on me to attend, using up 3 days annual leave, spending hundreds of euro, and hanging around bored on one of my precious days off work, then I think I am entitled to have a view.

iamwhoiam

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

The problem though is that some weddings now make huge demands of the guests in terms of time, money and convenience. So really people are entitled to comment if they find those weddings a bit of a trial. I am more than happy for Bob and Sarah to get married in the middle of nowhere and to spend 3 hours being photographed in front of the lake and so on. But if there's pressure on me to attend, using up 3 days annual leave, spending hundreds of euro, and hanging around bored on one of my precious days off work, then I think I am entitled to have a view.

Yes and thats fair enough . I just don't like people criticising every move a bride makes . Some brides are very reasonable and accomadating

LirW

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

The problem though is that some weddings now make huge demands of the guests in terms of time, money and convenience. So really people are entitled to comment if they find those weddings a bit of a trial. I am more than happy for Bob and Sarah to get married in the middle of nowhere and to spend 3 hours being photographed in front of the lake and so on. But if there's pressure on me to attend, using up 3 days annual leave, spending hundreds of euro, and hanging around bored on one of my precious days off work, then I think I am entitled to have a view.

This is pretty much how I think about it.

meeeeh

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

The problem though is that some weddings now make huge demands of the guests in terms of time, money and convenience. So really people are entitled to comment if they find those weddings a bit of a trial. I am more than happy for Bob and Sarah to get married in the middle of nowhere and to spend 3 hours being photographed in front of the lake and so on. But if there's pressure on me to attend, using up 3 days annual leave, spending hundreds of euro, and hanging around bored on one of my precious days off work, then I think I am entitled to have a view.

If only a word like 'no' would exist.

LirW

Nokotan wrote: »

I don't agree with that at all. I've gone into some weddings expecting it to be a bit of a chore, my girlfriend's colleague's wedding for example. I knew nobody at the wedding and thought I'd be bored out of my tree. However, I talked to people, they talked to me, we had some drinks, we had a dance and in the end it was a fantastic night full of happy people. I've not met or thought of any of them since but that doesn't matter.

It really depends hugely on the crowd. There are superb crowds that you could hang with days and then there are crowds being really stuck up and judgemental. I do look a little bit alternative and went to a wedding where the bride came from a very wealthy doctor family, a lot of her family was there and that was an incredibly uncomfortable and old crowd that was sitting around bitter and judging everything that doesn't remotely fit into their views. We then got seated on the table with one of the grooms cousins who was an incredible show-off and was only talking about his life achievements and where he travelled and then broke off an argument with another guest why they're vegetarian.
It's a bit of a lottery and you never know how this could turn out.

Seen both and it really can make or break the mood.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

meeeeh wrote: »

If only a word like 'no' would exist.

We've already explained why sometimes a bald refusal isn't really an option without causing difficulties or hurt feelings.

Gannicus

You don't have to go at all OP. Most people send out x amount of invites for y amount of spaces knowing that people won't go but may still send a small wedding gift or a few quid to the couple.

I've been to a few weddings over the years and only enjoyed 2 of them. The biggest bug to bear is how the hotels and venues know they are going to sell a heap of drink and rooms so they auto up the price and you say your with the "blah wedding" and get a quote unquote discounted rate on the room.

Was at a wedding there 2 years ago and the hotel had the reception hall (and some rooms) across a decent sized courtyard to the rooms and main hotel and there was a difference of €1 more in the price of the pints compared to the main bar. Needless to say once word got out the whole wedding shifted over to the main building and there was murder between the wedding party, their parents, and the hotel manager. about it. AFAIK after the wedding, solicitors got involved.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

Gannicus wrote: »

You don't have to go at all OP. Most people send out x amount of invites for y amount of spaces knowing that people won't go but may still send a small wedding gift or a few quid to the couple.

I've been to a few weddings over the years and only enjoyed 2 of them. The biggest bug to bear is how the hotels and venues know they are going to sell a heap of drink and rooms so they auto up the price and you say your with the "blah wedding" and get a quote unquote discounted rate on the room.

Was at a wedding there 2 years ago and the hotel had the reception hall (and some rooms) across a decent sized courtyard to the rooms and main hotel and there was a difference of €1 more in the price of the pints compared to the main bar. Needless to say once word got out the whole wedding shifted over to the main building and there was murder between the wedding party, their parents, and the hotel manager. about it. AFAIK after the wedding, solicitors got involved.

In fairness I do think it makes sense, where possible, to accommodate wedding guests in a separate part of the hotel. I have spent many nights in hotels being kept awake by loud, drunk wedding guests shouting and singing at 2am and ignoring repeated requests by staff to keep the noise down.
Likewise it is really off putting, the following day, to have the lounge or bar area completely taken over by hung over, bleary eyed wedding guests, making other hotel residents feel like they're crashing a private event.

I actually hate staying in a hotel when there's a wedding on, and avoid it if possible.

Gannicus

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

In fairness I do think it makes sense, where possible, to accommodate wedding guests in a separate part of the hotel. I have spent many nights in hotels being kept awake by loud, drunk wedding guests shouting and singing at 2am and ignoring repeated requests by staff to keep the noise down.
Likewise it is really off putting, the following day, to have the lounge or bar area completely taken over by hung over, bleary eyed wedding guests, making other hotel residents feel like they're crashing a private event.

I actually hate staying in a hotel when there's a wedding on, and avoid it if possible.

I agree with you totally when it comes to the noise levels etc for non staying guests and it is a good idea to keep them in a separate building or wing of the hotel, but for the hotel to do what they do with the prices to try and further gouge people (who are already gonna spend a lot of money) of that much more money is reprehensible.

meeeeh

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

We've already explained why sometimes a bald refusal isn't really an option without causing difficulties or hurt feelings.

It's preferable to bitching behind their back in my opinion. I accept the wedding of close friends or family might be a bit hard to get out. There are not that many of those. Some complaints are understandable, if people are rude or ignorant, if service is not right or band too loud. But when you know advance where the wedding is and that you won't enjoy the travel or the location then just say no.

iamwhoiam

People are kind enough to invite you to their wedding and then get ripped apart for not " doing it as you would have done it "

qwerty ui op

iamwhoiam wrote: »

Yes and thats fair enough . I just don't like people criticising every move a bride makes . Some brides are very reasonable and accomadating

I completely agree but that's not the problem, the problem is that Irish people are already fully stocked up on weddings and it doesn't matter how you arrange the flowers, many of your guest in a large wedding really don't want to be there. If the couple were assholes it would make the situation a lot easier.

LirW

iamwhoiam wrote: »

People are kind enough to invite you to their wedding and then get ripped apart for not " doing it as you would have done it "

It goes both ways though: There are couples that make everything incredibly awkward for their whole party and treat them badly and then there are guests that you wouldn't wanna invite for tea, never mind such an important event.

DaeryssaOne

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

The problem though is that some weddings now make huge demands of the guests in terms of time, money and convenience. So really people are entitled to comment if they find those weddings a bit of a trial. I am more than happy for Bob and Sarah to get married in the middle of nowhere and to spend 3 hours being photographed in front of the lake and so on. But if there's pressure on me to attend, using up 3 days annual leave, spending hundreds of euro, and hanging around bored on one of my precious days off work, then I think I am entitled to have a view.

Have you honestly taken three days of annual leave to attend a wedding in the middle of nowhere where you had to wait around bored for three hours waiting for the bride and groom to come and entertain you, you couldn't possibly speak to anybody else or realise that their wedding day didn't centre around one guest?

The amount of whinging in this thread is so ridiculous, having been to 20+ weddings in the last number of years I have never heard a single person complain like people are here. Yes - sometimes the speeches go on far too long, yes sometimes there noticeably isn't enough food / wine or the band may not be to my taste but you know what - the day wasn't organised for me and 99% of the time it's a lovely day out, I understand it can be a racket and some couples get carried away but the negativity here is just silly

topper75

jk23 wrote: »

Agreed. See flash mob dances at churches or singing by bride or bridesmaid after the initial one went viral at a reception!

These 'family emergencies'... they can come on at any time, can't they? :eek::o

dib

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

And you have to give 150 as a gift if you’re single, or 300 if you’re a couple.

HAHAHA! OP I think your Nephew found this thread!! €300 me hole!!

Mutant z

Only the very closest family members and friends should be there i dont see the logic with having guests which you dont speak to year to year it just makes the whole situation extremely awkward for both parties.

splinter65

meeeeh wrote: »

What is 'their own thing'. Going for some food after civil ceremony with small party? Plenty of people do that you just probably won't be invited because they are smaller. Civil ceremony in the venue - fairly standard but there are less humanist celebrants available so there won't be as many. Eloping is hardly original, destination weddings are common, I've been to few.

I enjoyed myself at my own. We had about 65 guests, around 80 were invited. It was traditional wedding, we just made sure there was plenty of food and booze was free everywhere. I got one comment that people were hungry waiting for dinner. About half of finger food that was provided before dinner wasn't eaten (and I know the person complaining likes the type of food that was there). I just shrugged my shoulders. We had one other complaint from a relative that they didn't felt a bit sick because they 'had' to eat too much food. You just can't please everyone. Once you make a decent effort to accommodate people you just have to accept that not everyone will be happy no matter what you do.

Personally I just don't like the constant bickering about the stuff people that they know in advance will happen. I don't like people who can't wait to complain about something just so they can say something bad about the others and make themselves feel better. If you don't want to go to traditional/small/destination/humanist wedding then don't go.

Anyone who makes a point of complaining to the host after any party is a **** anyway.
My grudge about Irish weddings is not personal it’s about the Irish wedding culture. I actually feel sorry for the couples either saving or borrowing a whole load of cash a little bit like sheep thinking that there is no alternative.

splinter65

DaeryssaOne wrote: »

Have you honestly taken three days of annual leave to attend a wedding in the middle of nowhere where you had to wait around bored for three hours waiting for the bride and groom to come and entertain you, you couldn't possibly speak to anybody else or realise that their wedding day didn't centre around one guest?

The amount of whinging in this thread is so ridiculous, having been to 20+ weddings in the last number of years I have never heard a single person complain like people are here. Yes - sometimes the speeches go on far too long, yes sometimes there noticeably isn't enough food / wine or the band may not be to my taste but you know what - the day wasn't organised for me and 99% of the time it's a lovely day out, I understand it can be a racket and some couples get carried away but the negativity here is just silly

Complaining about weddings in public is taboo. There’ll always be someone in the immediate vicinity currently or recently involved in the organizing of a wedding who’s going to take gross offence. What you get here is honest opinions.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

iamwhoiam wrote: »

People are kind enough to invite you to their wedding and then get ripped apart for not " doing it as you would have done it "

That is not what people are saying.

qwerty ui op

DaeryssaOne wrote: »

The amount of whinging in this thread is so ridiculous, having been to 20+ weddings in the last number of years I have never heard a single person complain like people are here.

AH has had several wedding threads and they are all just like this one, people anonymously complaining.

Nobody is going to pay half a fortune and start giving out at the actual event, having paid the money they may try and enjoy the day, most people would enjoy staring into the fire if they had enough booze on board. It doesn't change the fact that many people feel pressure to go to weddings and don't want to spend there money on them.

You can accuse these posters of being spineless etc but just because people are smiling on the day isn't really a good guide as to how they feel about being forced to go.

LirW

splinter65 wrote: »

Anyone who makes a point of complaining to the host after any party is a **** anyway.
My grudge about Irish weddings is not personal it’s about the Irish wedding culture. I actually feel sorry for the couples either saving or borrowing a whole load of cash a little bit like sheep thinking that there is no alternative.

That really. The industry behind it messes it up, that's often the real problem. There are millions and millions of gimmicks out there that everyone's raving about, new wedding dress collections hit the market every single year and shops are sprinkled all over the country like fairy dust, good money is made by vintage car hiring services and every hotel in the backsticks has their own open day for weddings just in time after Valentine's day.
To top it off, you'd have weight watchers and magic slimming powder merchants creeping around everywhere where anything wedding related is around.

The the crux, many people don't wanna buy into it but it's heavily pushed, because people spend money on it.
The single most common conflict couples have is because something isn't done a certain way. Some people genuinely enjoy it but some don't yet there are very high expectations from people close to them.
So in the end the couple ends up having more people than they're comfortable with because Mammy in law decided to pay for her 20 pals herself to have them around, finger food is too 80's according to all suppliers so you order a food truck, that's how you do it 2018.

That's the real thing that's sad about it, there are so many expectations, there is a lot of pressure doing things a certain way and there is an horrendous amount of emotional blackmailing (Then I won't be coming blah blah).

Everyone knows someone who had drama like that and it makes people somewhat cynical about the whole thing.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

DaeryssaOne wrote: »

Have you honestly taken three days of annual leave to attend a wedding in the middle of nowhere where you had to wait around bored for three hours waiting for the bride and groom to come and entertain you, you couldn't possibly speak to anybody else or realise that their wedding day didn't centre around one guest?

The amount of whinging in this thread is so ridiculous, having been to 20+ weddings in the last number of years I have never heard a single person complain like people are here. Yes - sometimes the speeches go on far too long, yes sometimes there noticeably isn't enough food / wine or the band may not be to my taste but you know what - the day wasn't organised for me and 99% of the time it's a lovely day out, I understand it can be a racket and some couples get carried away but the negativity here is just silly

It can be a lot more than 3 days if the wedding is abroad. Even in Ireland a wedding midweek a four hour drive away can necessitate travelling over the day before, staying the day of the wedding, and travelling back the next day, so three days in all.
And yes, I have often been left hanging around for three hours waiting for food. It's not that people want the bride and groom to stop having photos taken so they can come back and entertain their guests. It's that the meal can't start until they're back and people are starving.
No one is whinging. We are taking part in a discussion about modern weddings and some of the newer elements that we don't like because of the cost and inconvencience they put guests to.

NIMAN

OP is bang on.

Hate weddings, only attend to not offend the bride and groom. If I had my way, I wouldn't be at another.

One coming up soon, will have to laugh at the jokes I've heard 20 times already, the same best man speech, applaud the bridesmaids (aren't they looking lovely), applaud the priest, the hotel for a lovely meal (which they are getting handsomely paid for, they are a business after all), and listen to the same old songs for hours on end by the band.

gabsdot40

I like weddings. I've been to some really good ones.
Unfortunatly we're going to one on the same day as the Champions League Final.
They better have a TV in the corner.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

I'm beginning to think the world is divided into those who love weddings and those who hate them.

qwerty ui op

NIMAN wrote: »

OP is bang on.

Hate weddings, only attend to not offend the bride and groom. If I had my way, I wouldn't be at another.

One coming up soon, will have to laugh at the jokes I've heard 20 times already, the same best man speech, applaud the bridesmaids (aren't they looking lovely), applaud the priest, the hotel for a lovely meal (which they are getting handsomely paid for, they are a business after all), and listen to the same old songs for hours on end by the band.

My first wedding in my mid teens was just like this that was twenty two years ago and no sign of anything changing -depressing

jk23

splinter65 wrote: »

Anyone who makes a point of complaining to the host after any party is a **** anyway.
My grudge about Irish weddings is not personal it’s about the Irish wedding culture. I actually feel sorry for the couples either saving or borrowing a whole load of cash a little bit like sheep thinking that there is no alternative.

This is exactly it, when you hear of upwards of 20,000 being spent on one day it’s overboard.

All the things that type of money could be used on while still have a nice wedding for a whole lot less.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

jk23 wrote: »

This is exactly it, when you hear of upwards of 20,000 being spent on one day it’s overboard.

All the things that type of money could be used on while still have a nice wedding for a whole lot less.

Except that nowadays, much of that 20,000 comes from the guests 'covering their plate'.

jk23

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

Except that nowadays, much of that 20,000 comes from the guests 'covering their plate'.

Absolutely crazy! There does seem to be an emotionally driven pressure for the guests to give money. Seems to be 150 for a couple minimum 😳 150 euro x 150 guests = 22,250 euro

c68zapdsm5i1ru

jk23 wrote: »

Absolutely crazy! There does seem to be an emotionally driven pressure for the guests to give money. Seems to be 150 for a couple minimum ��

Yes, wedding presents were originally about guests rallying around to provide young couples setting up house together for the first time with all the basics - pots and pans, crockery, cutlery, bed linen and so on.

Nowadays it seems to be about covering the costs of an extravagant wedding that the couple can't afford, or an expensive holiday in the Maldives.

Times have really changed.

Steve F

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

I'm beginning to think the world is divided into those who love weddings and those who hate them.

Bang on!!!:D

LirW

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

Yes, wedding presents were originally about guests rallying around to provide young couples setting up house together for the first time with all the basics - pots and pans, crockery, cutlery, bed linen and so on.

Nowadays it seems to be about covering the costs of an extravagant wedding that the couple can't afford, or an expensive holiday in the Maldives.

Times have really changed.

That mentality is really awful. It really doesn't sit right with me and I'd find it financially unwise to speculate with presents to cover the cost of my wedding.
Main thing why I'm having a small thing is because I couldn't justify spending more than the amount we are going to. That's what we can shoulder ourselves without help, so we're not going to be in debt or a financial predicament when the whole thing with presents doesn't pan out :pac:

Steve F

Fred Swanson wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

A castle in Co Louth

Steve F

_Dara_ wrote: »

One thing that amazes me is the level of analysis some couples put into planning their wedding. I kinda get it. It's costing a lot of money and you are asking people to spend time and money to attend. So I can understand the fretting. But looking at the wedding forum can be eye-opening (well, when it was busier a few years back at least) in how analytical people can be about a day that people will enjoy well enough but quickly forget about if it's not somebody really, really close to them.

It's 18 months of rigmarole for what?.... 18 hours at most?
And don't get me started on the total cost of a wedding
Divide the total cost by 18 to get the hourly rate :pac:
Madness

meeeeh

jk23 wrote: »

Absolutely crazy! There does seem to be an emotionally driven pressure for the guests to give money. Seems to be 150 for a couple minimum �� 150 euro x 150 guests = 22,250 euro

Well if it's 150 per couple and you had 150 guests then it's 75 x 150 = 11,250

Just in case you are planning to organize your wedding like that because you might end up with a bit of hole in your finances.

Then again I shouldn't comment because our planning included just paying bills and I haven't got a clue what our total cost was.

jk23

meeeeh wrote: »

Well if it's 150 per couple and you had 150 guests then it's 75 x 150 = 11,250

Just in case you are planning to organize your wedding like that because you might end up with a bit of hole in your finances.

Thanks for that! Maths was never my strong point :L

qwerty ui op

jk23 wrote: »

Absolutely crazy! There does seem to be an emotionally driven pressure for the guests to give money. Seems to be 150 for a couple minimum �� 150 euro x 150 guests = 22,250 euro

This is true and people who want to bury their heads in the sand and say "if you don't want to go then just don't go " or " you don't have to put X amount in the card" are just not facing up to the issue here.
This threads OP has 115 thanks and counting! why would so many people say they are under pressure to go along with this madness , if they weren't

LirW

qwerty ui op wrote: »

This is true and people who want to bury their heads in the sand and say "if you don't want to go then just don't go " or " you don't have to put X amount in the card" are just not facing up to the issue here.
This threads OP has 115 thanks and counting! why would so many people say they are under pressure to go along with this madness , if they weren't

What issue exactly? That the couple decided to get married in a super fancy location that puts them out of pocket in the first place? I don't really see why the guests should be expected to pay for the couple's choices.
If you can't afford getting married in Castle X, then there are a lot other, more budget friendly options or save for it.

If I can only afford 50 quid and a tin of biscuits, that's what I can afford to give them.

splinter65

LirW wrote: »

That mentality is really awful. It really doesn't sit right with me and I'd find it financially unwise to speculate with presents to cover the cost of my wedding.
Main thing why I'm having a small thing is because I couldn't justify spending more than the amount we are going to. That's what we can shoulder ourselves without help, so we're not going to be in debt or a financial predicament when the whole thing with presents doesn't pan out :pac:

Over on the weddings forum I remember a poster telling of being in the bridal suite the morning after a wedding as the B&G desperately tore open the accumulated envelopes desperately trying to gather together the cash to pay the hotel bill which was to be settled of course at departure.
The foul language at the sight of a solitary €50 was in stark contrast to the demure couple standing at the alter not 24 earlier.

jk23

splinter65 wrote: »

Over on the weddings forum I remember a poster telling of being in the bridal suite the morning after a wedding as the B&G desperately tore open the accumulated envelopes desperately trying to gather together the cash to pay the hotel bill which was to be settled of course at departure.
The foul language at the sight of a solitary €50 was in stark contrast to the demure couple standing at the alter not 24 earlier.

I am sure there are brides and grooms who have it all sorted in advance financially. However behavior like that would put you off weddings.

A lot is to do with the pressure on the bride and groom to have certain things at weddings seen in the media or at friends weddings I think!

LirW

I've just read about a bride going on a horrible rant towards their venue that she's paying 140 quid per head for the party but would have to pay 5 euros supplement pP for Steak if she wanted it on the menu, she's oblivious. I don't get how people can get so worked up over that.

Grand when you have all the money or a tight savings plan, but I don't get why you'd put up such a huge gamble on such an important day for yourself.


Just reminded me of that lady that tried chancing her arm with a hotel by threatening them into knocking costs down because a few people couldn't show up because the GAA team made it to some important game unexpectedly. Why. Would. You. Do. That.

LirW

A lot is to do with the pressure on the bride and groom to have certain things at weddings seen in the media or at friends weddings I think!

I constantly get to hear what cake we need to have, what shoes I need to wear and the list goes on. Now I can easily tell people off, no problem, but I know a lot can't and might even get blackmailed into doing things.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

LirW wrote: »

What issue exactly? That the couple decided to get married in a super fancy location that puts them out of pocket in the first place? I don't really see why the guests should be expected to pay for the couple's choices.
If you can't afford getting married in Castle X, then there are a lot other, more budget friendly options or save for it.

If I can only afford 50 quid and a tin of biscuits, that's what I can afford to give them.

I think Qwerty was actually agreeing that guests are being put under undue pressure to attend extravagant weddings and put a minimum amount of cash in a card.

LirW

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

I think Qwerty was actually agreeing that guests are being put under undue pressure to attend extravagant weddings and put a minimum amount of cash in a card.

My bad then, but the point stands! It's all going hand in hand really.
I find it hard to hear about people (even here on boards) that give their presents according to how fancy the wedding is.

meeeeh

I found that if you don't discuss the wedding then you don't have to suffer other people's opinions about what you should do.

LirW

meeeeh wrote: »

I found that if you don't discuss the wedding then you don't have to suffer other people's opinions about what you should do.

You'd be surprised how many people involve themselves in the planning.
Weddings are these occasions that bring the crazy out in people and slumbering conflicts to the surface.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

LirW wrote: »

I constantly get to hear what cake we need to have, what shoes I need to wear and the list goes on. Now I can easily tell people off, no problem, but I know a lot can't and might even get blackmailed into doing things.

Yes, I imagine a lot of brides start out wanting a smaller, more personal wedding and then get brainwashed by friends or sisters into believing that their wedding will be a disaster if they don't have it in a proper hotel, with a sit down meal, and a loud band, and a burger van for the 'afters' and a photo booth and a load of other gimmicks that might have been unusual and quirky the first time somebody thought of them but not after they've been copied a million and one times.

meeeeh

LirW wrote: »

You'd be surprised how many people involve themselves in the planning.
Weddings are these occasions that bring the crazy out in people and slumbering conflicts to the surface.

Only people I had some issues with were my parents and even that was mostly about what restaurants to pick for people travelling outside the wedding. I ignored them on just about everything and after the wedding they were among those who commented the most how much they liked the wedding.

My reply to questions how the planning is going on would be usually 'fine' and that was the end of discussion.