Fallen for a girl at work

khaldrogo

A Pint of Goo wrote:

She spends her free time at work with me. She suggest we hang out after work. She laughs at my jokes Seems genuinely interested in what I get up to.

Lay it out. Tell her you like her and would like to see her if she is ever single in the future.

riffmongous

If you do it drunk there is a good chance she will regret it immediately after or put it down to the alcohol, or chicken out of breaking up with her bf.. as you'd say yourself, man up and say it to her sober

Ultimate Seduction

Even txt her if you know you can't say it to her face. Drink a few pints then text her if you have to. It could end up embarrassing for you if she rejects you though. I wouldn't ever go near a bird I work with.

retro:electro

Honestly from what I can see she has shown zero inclination towards liking you. So she laughs at your jokes and takes interest in what you get up to? Guess I must fancy all my mates so.
If you pounce on her while drink you run the risk of not only ruining your friendship, but totally mortifying the girl. If she thought you were worth ending her relationship over she’d have already done it. I think you’re being incredibly silly.

A Pint of Goo

retro:electro wrote: »

Honestly from what I can see she has shown zero inclination towards liking you. So she laughs at your jokes and takes interest in what you get up to? Guess I must fancy all my mates so.
If you pounce on her while drink you run the risk of not only ruining your friendship, but totally mortifying the girl. If she thought you were worth ending her relationship over she’d have already done it. I think you’re being incredibly silly.

I get on really well with a lot of the girls in the office but none of them ever say 'want to see this band tonight?'. Look I'm not a total fool, I know when a woman is into me.

Also I know full well that if we carry on like this much longer she'll lose interest and see me as just a friend.

Verity.

A Pint of Goo wrote: »

I know she likes me too.

Well if she doesn't take your bait, she's a girl worth keeping as far as her boyfriend is concerned. If she takes the bait, quite frankly you deserve each other. Bonus points for the boyfriend because he will have dodged a bullet. With a bit of luck she'd do the same thing to you some day.

If you really must take a girl in a relationship out, then at least have the gallantry to 'win her over' while she is sober enough to make sensible decisions for herself.

A Pint of Goo

Verity. wrote: »

Well if she doesn't take your bait, she's a girl worth keeping as far as her boyfriend is concerned. If she takes the bait, quite frankly you deserve each other. Bonus points for the boyfriend because he will have dodged a bullet. With a bit of luck she'd do the same thing to you some day.

If you really must take a girl in a relationship out, then at least have the gallantry to 'win her over' while she is sober enough to make sensible decisions for herself.

Why am I the bad guy in all this? She is not an innocent teenager. Considering she has got me drunk with before I'd say she knows what she's doing.

MEGA BRO WOLF 5000

A Pint of Goo wrote: »

I am 30. Why would I care about his feelings? He's not my friend. Ive never met him.

I have met a woman who seems to be perfect for me, who actually gets me. If you met someone who seems perfect for you, would just let them go?

You sound like a catch.

Mrtestosterone

Whatever the case, you should move quickly or you'll get friendzoned and won't have a chance. You have to go straight to the point.

Verity.

A Pint of Goo wrote: »

Why am I the bad guy in all this? She is not an innocent teenager. Considering she has got me drunk with before I'd say she knows what she's doing.

You've portrayed yourself the bad guy as you put it, due to your questionably low morals and the tactics in which you would use to win this one over.

If she is doing the same thing as you, perhaps you should make a move sooner rather than later. The boyfriend deserves better than her.

Arrival

A Pint of Goo wrote: »

Very defeatist attitude. I like her and she likes me. What if I never meet one like her again?

God above, give it a rest. Respect her relationship. Put yourself in the shoes of the boyfriend, would you be cool with what she's doing? Let's say you end up "winning her over" (just lol at this) and she leaves him for you, what then? Do you not draw the reasonable, common sense conclusion that this person is capable of emotionally cheating in a relationship and so disloyal that they'll leave a partner for somebody else? It's monkey branching and you want to stay away from anyone that does it. You need to get out more, there are so many other good women out there that'll be easy to connect with

Mrtestosterone

Arrival wrote: »

God above, give it a rest. Respect her relationship. Put yourself in the shoes of the boyfriend, would you be cool with what she's doing? Let's say you end up "winning her over" (just lol at this) and she leaves him for you, what then? Do you not draw the reasonable, common sense conclusion that this person is capable of emotionally cheating in a relationship and so disloyal that they'll leave a partner for somebody else? It's monkey branching and you want to stay away from anyone that does it. You need to get out more, there are so many other good women out there that'll be easy to connect with

She's going to cheat with someone else anyway.

A Pint of Goo

Arrival wrote: »

God above, give it a rest. Respect her relationship. Put yourself in the shoes of the boyfriend, would you be cool with what she's doing? Let's say you end up "winning her over" (just lol at this) and she leaves him for you, what then? Do you not draw the reasonable, common sense conclusion that this person is capable of emotionally cheating in a relationship and so disloyal that they'll leave a partner for somebody else? It's monkey branching and you want to stay away from anyone that does it. You need to get out more, there are so many other good women out there that'll be easy to connect with

As I have said before I am love with her. If I just wanted sex I wouldn't do this but I am going ahead with it this Saturday and we will see what happens.

Maybe the boyfriend is a great guy or maybe he's a scumbag. I don't know. I do know sometimes you have to be selfish and do what's right for you.

Rekop dog

You're coming across very juvenile for 30 If you're not on the wind up here.

This is lose/lose in the long run. If you read the signals wrong and she turns you down because she has a boyfriend you look like a twat and have to still work with this person.

If something does happen and she ends it with her boyfriend and gets with you, you still look like a twat but there will also come a day/many days when she's out with her friends when you're not there and you'll question what a girl that's cheated before can do when you're not around. You'll never be able to fully trust her.

Now have some respect for yourself/her/her relationship and don't be that guy.

fin12

The op said she was leaving the office soon.

SusieBlue

Sorry but intentionally going after someone who is in a relationship is despicable.

And it’s worth noting that if a woman posted a thread saying she was planning on doing the same to a man in a relationship, she’d be ripped to shreds, and rightly so.

Is that really a positive, stable foundation for starting a relationship with someone? Lack of respect aside, it’s so messy.
Leave her alone. Find someone single.

A Pint of Goo

Rekop dog wrote: »

You're coming across very juvenile for 30 If you're not on the wind up here.

This is lose/lose in the long run. If you read the signals wrong and she turns you down because she has a boyfriend you look like a twat and have to still work with this person.


Now have some respect for yourself/her/her relationship and don't be that guy.

She is leaving the office soon so it won't matter.


I'm not trolling and this is a serious issue for me. It's been wrecking my head for a month now. Most people here are telling me not to do it and maybe you're right. Maybe I'll chicken out in the end.

dudara

@unattendedbag & MadYaker - if you think a post is trolling then please use Report Post. Do not reply on thread adding empty noise to the discussion

dudara

dudara

@anewme - post deleted as it was off topic. Please use Report Post and let the mods decide.

Closing this thread for now to let emotions cool down. We will revisit tomorrow.

dudara