Urban legends

Iseedeadpixels

So I just heard this old urban legend in work today


https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055299771


Almost the same story, co worker doesn't know the person, friend of a friend etc happened in Amsterdam same as above, she refuses to believe it is a urban legend :pac:


What other good urban legends are doing the rounds?

Allinall

How come you never hear about rural legends, apart from Marty Morrissey of course?

razorblunt

The pet snake that was "cuddling" up to its owner at night being being flat out on the bed alongside them. Turns out this behaviour a snake does when it's measuring potential prey to see if the carcass would fit ... or something.


Also, the fell who had a liathróid get caught in the hip socket while it was being put back into place following a dislocation on the sports field.

Dramatik

Never to buy citrus fruit in places like spar or centra on Thomas street in Dublin as some of the junkies will stick their needles into the citrus fruits in an effort to clean the dirty needles :eek:

Outlaw Pete

Couple in a restaurant and see Bono eating with a guy and when Bono goes to the toilet they ask the guy to get Bono's autograph for him, which he does, and then as they are leaving and paying their bill they're told: "Mr Springsteen has paid your bill".

Must have been told it a dozen times or more now. A taxi driver once told me this (with him apparently being the one who had asked for the autograph) while he was driving me to see the Boss at Croker. A guy in the Graham Norton 'red chair' also once told it to a huge round of applause.


EDIT: here's the chap on the GN show.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kkf9n-WQ5Ik

McMurphy

Woman/Man eats kfc burger, loads of mayo.

Next day severe stomach cramps.

Rushed to hospital.

Established that there is semen from several different sources present in stomach.


Have heard that story, concerning about 8 different local KFC branches in my time.

1 of which was in Holland.

corner of hells

Dramatik wrote: »

Never to buy citrus fruit in places like spar or centra on Thomas street in Dublin as some of the junkies will stick their needles into the citrus fruits in an effort to clean the dirty needles :eek:

Apt username.

Outlaw Pete

The semen one reminds me of one I was told back in the late 80's of someone smuggling a KFC takeout into Savoy One and as they are eating it feel liquid filling their mouth and spilling down their chin. So they go into the toilet and see that their face is covered in blood and it turns out they were eating a warm mouse in batter.

facehugger99

None of your fancy stuff, just horse it into me.

Omackeral

I don’t know about any of these stories but as I was coming to work on the bus some black one tried to get on with her buggy. The driver said “sorry love, I’ve two buggies on here already, you’ll have to wait for the next bus”. The lady just took the kid out and left it at the bus stop and said “it is fine, the social welfare will give me another”.

the beer revolu

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

The semen one reminds me of one I was told back in the late 80's of someone smuggling a KFC takeout into Savoy One and as they are eating it feel liquid filling their mouth and spilling down their chin. So they go into the toilet and see that their face is covered in blood and it turns out they were eating a warm mouse in batter.

That's true.
Except it happened in Cork and it was a rat.

seamus

Woman makes a Slim-fast shake but then gets a phone call and has to rush off somewhere.

Arrives home hours later to find that there are "worms" swimming around in it, and that's how slim-fast works.

angryIreGamer

seamus wrote: »

Woman makes a Slim-fast shake but then gets a phone call and has to rush off somewhere.

Arrives home hours later to find that there are "worms" swimming around in it, and that's how slim-fast works.

not worms, maggots. the maggots eat your fat.

is slim fast still a thing?

Snakeweasel

Omackeral wrote: »

I don’t know about any of these stories but as I was coming to work on the bus some black one tried to get on with her buggy. The driver said “sorry love, I’ve two buggies on here already, you’ll have to wait for the next bus”. The lady just took the kid out and left it at the bus stop and said “it is fine, the social welfare will give me another”.

A teacher of mine told us this one in school about 15 years ago! think in her version it was someone on the dole rather than any ethnicity.

fixXxer

seamus wrote: »

Woman makes a Slim-fast shake but then gets a phone call and has to rush off somewhere.

Arrives home hours later to find that there are "worms" swimming around in it, and that's how slim-fast works.

That reminds me of the time in work we got a 3 foot long tape worm from a patient. Pretty cool seeing a real one.

realdanbreen

Iseedeadpixels wrote: »

So I just heard this old urban legend in work today


https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055299771


Almost the same story, co worker doesn't know the person, friend of a friend etc happened in Amsterdam same as above, she refuses to believe it is a urban legend :pac:


What other good urban legends are doing the rounds?

I think you might be mixing your Urban Legends up with your Urban Myths ?

FFred

Just after 9/11 a mysterious ‘foreigner’ returning a favour to someone, warns that person not to be on Grafton Street at a certain date and time as there is a terror attack imminent.

Ragnar Lothbrok

Girl arrives home on the night of her 18th birthday to find an empty house. She's feeling a bit frisky, and gets her pet alsatian to give her oral pleasure on the couch, at exactly the same time as the doors open wide to reveal all her family shouting "SURPRI................."

Was told that this happened in Dublin, so it must be true

saintsaltynuts

Will Smith. The hit the floor one.

Are Am Eye

The babysitter and the clown statue....

AnnaSophia

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

Couple in a restaurant and see Bono eating with a guy and when Bono goes to the toilet they ask the guy to get Bono's autograph for him, which he does, and then as they are leaving and paying their bill they're told: "Mr Springsteen has paid your bill".

Must have been told it a dozen times or more now. A taxi driver once told me this (with him apparently being the one who had asked for the autograph) while he was driving me to see the Boss at Croker. A guy in the Graham Norton 'red chair' also once told it to a huge round of applause. Cunts.


EDIT: here's the chap on the GN show.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kkf9n-WQ5Ik

I met Springsteen a couple of years ago, and the AMOUNT of people who tell me that story if I say anything about it is ridiculous.

jim salter

I'm an Urban Legend

Allinall

Omackeral wrote: »

I . ........The lady just took the kid out and left it at the bus stop and said “it is fine, the social welfare will give me another”.

Bloody hell. The social give out free babies now.

What’s the world coming to?

the beer revolu

Allinall wrote: »

Bloody hell. The social give out free babies now.

What’s the world coming to?

Only to foreigners.

NickNickleby

jim salter wrote: »

I'm an Urban Legend

No, no,

I'm an urban legend,



and so is my wife!


(its The Life of Brian.before the wisecracks start:pac::pac::pac:)

mikemac2

The yanks on bus eireann who passed Bunratty Castle and remarked it was clever the castle was built so close to Shannon airport

Meh, the Brits have the same about Windsor castle and Heathrow

NickNickleby

The time one of the guys came back to the canteen early , only to find the cleaner removing his socks from the Burco boiler (used for making tea, for those who never heard of it - the boiler , not the socks).
I was going to embellish it a little and say it was his jocks. But then it would lose ALL credibility.:D

Boom_Bap

mikemac2 wrote: »

The yanks on bus eireann who passed Bunratty Castle and remarked it was clever the castle was built so close to Shannon airport

Meh, the Brits have the same about Windsor castle and Heathrow

Or the one about how Americans comment about how many athletes there are in Ireland on account of all the undesirables using tracksuits as their uniform of choice.

RhubarbCrumble

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Or the one about how Americans comment about how many athletes there are in Ireland on account of all the undesirables using tracksuits as their uniform of choice.

Or the American who drove his hire car all the way from the airport into town (any airport, any town) in first gear because he'd never driven ' a stick' before.

corner of hells

NickNickleby wrote: »

The time one of the guys came back to the canteen early , only to find the cleaner removing his socks from the Burco boiler (used for making tea, for those who never heard of it - the boiler , not the socks).
I was going to embellish it a little and say it was his jocks. But then it would lose ALL credibility.:D

Erm , I worked on a building site years ago where an apprentice was caught boiling eggs in the Burco , he was only caught because of the taste of the water.

Birneybau

I worked with a bloke years ago who would constantly spew urban legends/myths at me either with himself or a mate as the protagonist.

He really must have thought I was a thick (I'm not THAT thick)

Yester

corner of hells wrote: »

Erm , I worked on a building site years ago where an apprentice was caught boiling eggs in the Burco , he was only caught because of the taste of the water.

I caught a fellow at work shaving out of the kettle.

Joe prim

Omackeral wrote: »

I don’t know about any of these stories but as I was coming to work on the bus some black one tried to get on with her buggy. The driver said “sorry love, I’ve two buggies on here already, you’ll have to wait for the next bus”. The lady just took the kid out and left it at the bus stop and said “it is fine, the social welfare will give me another”.

The same thing happened to my cousin by marriage's next door neighbour, except that the black woman then paid everybody's fare and it turned that she was Beyoncé on her way to a gig in Croker.

angryIreGamer

Yester wrote: »

I caught a fellow at work shaving out of the kettle.

how the **** did he fit in a kettle?

NickNickleby

angryIreGamer wrote: »

how the **** did he fit in a kettle?

for crying out loud, angry, he only had to fit his face in.
and his hand
and the razor.

edit: it was his face he was shaving wasn't it??

Your Face

This one has happened everywhere to everyone ever:

A family moved into one house of a row of attached houses.
Every morning they wake up and the place looks a little bit different. Sometimes food is missing.

Then one night, one of the children says they saw a man in the kitchen but the parents don't believe him.
Weeks pass when the father needs to put stuff up in the attic.
He gets up there and first thing he notices is there is no wall between the attics in the houses.
He then sees that the place is kitted out to be a home. Someone is living up there and sneaking into the house at night to steal food.

DaeryssaOne

saintsaltynuts wrote: »

Will Smith. The hit the floor one.

What is that one? I've heard most others on here and am now intrigued?

Are Am Eye wrote: »

The babysitter and the clown statue....

Jesus that properly freaked me out for weeks after I heard it as a young teenager! I got the heebie jeebies even now thinking about it, daft and all as it is!

NickNickleby

Your Face wrote: »

This one has happened everywhere to everyone ever:

A family moved into one house of a row of attached houses.
Every morning they wake up and the place looks a little bit different. Sometimes food is missing.

Then one night, one of the children says they saw a man in the kitchen but the parents don't believe him.
Weeks pass when the father needs to put stuff up in the attic.
He gets up there and first thing he notices is there is no wall between the attics in the houses.
He then sees that the place is kitted out to be a home. Someone is living up there and sneaking into the house at night to steal food.

better one:
(told to me as absolute indisputable fact even down to identifying the specific house.....I suggested that with such detailed knowledge, he must be the perp.)
Three young teenage girls share a bedroom. One night after lights out they hear something in the attic, and there seems to be a crack of light coming in beside the ceiling light fitting. Dad investigates and finds hole knocked out of attic wall to next door and a mattress, lamp and porn mags stored over the girls' bedroom.

My granny's house was like that, actually, no dividing wall in the attics. Never heard any stories of shenanigans though.

Stigura

realdanbreen wrote: »

I think you might be mixing your Urban Legends up with your Urban Myths ?

Allinall wrote: »

How come you never hear about rural legends, apart from Marty Morrissey of course?

Leitrim is a Rural Myth

Theboinkmaster

DaeryssaOne wrote: »

What is that one? I've heard most others on here and am now intrigued?

just google it - not true and joke has been around since 70s, was eddie murphy, then will smith etc.

_Dara_

saintsaltynuts wrote: »

Will Smith. The hit the floor one.

Someone related the ‘hit the floor’ one to huge applause on Graham Norton once!

_Dara_

It’s always funny when someone gets indignant when you tell them they’ve just told you an urban myth. Huffing and puffing and insisting that they know the person it happened to. But they never can give a name...

Iseedeadpixels

The removed rib to suck his own dick myth, in my day it was Prince but I've heard Marilyn Manson too.

youtheman

Fellow goes into a milking parlour only to find his friend with one hand on the machine and one foot off the ground, shaking violently.  Reckons he is getting electrocuted, so being smart he decides to free yer man without touching him.  So he gets a large plank and hits him on the arm, thus releasing him from the machine.  Broke his arm though, but what the heck, he saved his life!. Turns out yer man had a stone in his wellington and was too lazy to take it off, so he just grabbed the machine for balance and shook his foot to drive the stone to the toe of the boot.

iamwhoiam

A neighbour of my friends sister in law was driving down a country road in Waterford one dark November night . She pulled into a garage to get a drink . As she pulled out a car followed her flashing lights and blinding her in the mirror . The car followed her far too close for comfort so as she got to the main road she pulled into a garage . The car followed her and the driver jumped out and pulled her out of the car .
He was an off duty Garda and had seen a man get into her back seat and lie low . When he was pulled out he had a knife and a rope in his rucksak



Same thing happened in Galway , Cork , Longford and Mayo

harry Bailey esq

Stigura wrote: »

Leitrim is a Rural Myth

It actually does exist. But Paul Williams mentions Leitrim at least seven times every morning on newstalk, hence a lot of people make the easy mistake of assuming it's existence is bull****.

realdanbreen

Yester wrote: »

I caught a fellow at work shaving out of the kettle.

What! Was he standing in the kettle?

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

iamwhoiam wrote: »

A neighbour of my friends sister in law was driving down a country road in Waterford one dark November night . She pulled into a garage to get a drink . As she pulled out a car followed her flashing lights and blinding her in the mirror . The car followed her far too close for comfort so as she got to the main road she pulled into a garage . The car followed her and the driver jumped out and pulled her out of the car .
He was an off duty Garda and had seen a man get into her back seat and lie low . When he was pulled out he had a knife and a rope in his rucksak



Same thing happened in Galway , Cork , Longford and Mayo

I heard that one in Mayo but people actually named the person who was apparently arrested. They probably just attached an existing myth to a local person who was known as being unstable or dangerous.

_Dara_

A popular late 90s-early 00s one was the person pulling in to the petrol station and the worker waving frantically at them. The driver goes to the worker who tells them there’s a man hiding in the back behind the driver seat.

EDIT: Oops, sorry, iamwhoiam!

I heard this one SO many times with people swearing that it was true.

The snake one was also one I got sick of hearing about.

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

The lad drinking liquid LSD from a naggin bottle at Oxegen and going mad.

ArnoldJRimmer

This one was very common during the Celtic Tiger. A couple are getting married and get a call from Ashford Castle/ Castle Leslie where they have booked their reception. They are asked if they can move their wedding date as David & Victoria Beckham/ Paul & Heather McCartney are renewing their vows/ getting married, and want the hotel for that exact date. But they are willing to pay for the couple's wedding in full, including honeymoon. Happened to many friends of friends, so a lot of free weddings round that time