Have your kids ever injured you?

az2wp0sye65487

Playing with my 2 yr old daughter earlier. I was sitting and she was standing in front of me. Her head was under my chin..... when she decided to jump up in the air! My teeth chattered and for a minute I thought she might have done more damage. For a while afterwards my jaw was a little sore.

I can't count the number of times I've been jumped on, knees-first, and 90% of the time it seems that it's knees to the groin!

Obviously these are minor things, but I'm just wondering has anyone suffered serious injuries at the hands of their children?! (Unintentionally of course)

Mj2016

Belle Lazy Waiver wrote: »

Playing with my 2 yr old daughter earlier. I was sitting and she was standing in front of me. Her head was under my chin..... when she decided to jump up in the air! My teeth chattered and for a minute I thought she might have done more damage. For a while afterwards my jaw was a little sore.

I can't count the number of times I've been jumped on, knees-first, and 90% of the time it seems that it's knees to the groin!

Obviously these are minor things, but I'm just wondering has anyone suffered serious injuries at the hands of their children?! (Unintentionally of course)

This is a common in our house. I've got a busted lip twice, but my partner always ends up worse. She's got 3 black eyes and a fat lip to. Their heads go every where. With dead weight too.

I'm concious now as I think people might think I've actually physically harmed my partner. Defo not the case though.

NIMAN

Wee lad kicked the ball into the old crown jewels one time, does that count?

shaunr68

Not exactly on topic but I'll share anyway. When I was a baby my dad was lying on the floor playing, holding me over him, I giggled a bit and promptly vomited in his mouth. I also peed on a priest which is my proudest achievement.

pcuser

Knocked out cold. I was playing with my Eldest son when he was about 3. I was laying on the floor and cuddling him. He climbed up the side of the couch and jumped on my head. While he was jumping I lifted my head up only to have his weight land on it and cause it to hit the floor.

(He also took a ****e in the bath with me as a baby, That was worse)

oal22

Corneal abrasion courtesy of a 4 month old. At first it was your average finger-in-the-eye ouchy. 6 hours later I was in agony. One whole side of my face was throbbing. Was sick with the pain

az2wp0sye65487

Yikes!

I'll consider myself lucky to come away with just a couple of bumps!

harr

Few bumps and scratches worst was being almost knocked out by my then 3 year old...what ever way he dived on the bed he clocked me..I looked up just as he lowered his head, got me on the jaw near the ear..I was spinning for 20 minutes

Neyite

Scratched eyeball, bitten nipple, numerous head-butts, hair pulled out

jlm29

My then two year old gave me a fairly instantaneous and traumatic ingrowing toe nail one day that he stood on my foot.
I got two days off work, a minor procedure from the chiropodist and a course of anti biotics

pwurple

The front teeth knocked out is really common... when people have toddlers or babies on their laps, they can fling their massive skulls backwards and wallop you! 
So far so good here, only my last shred of dignity and nerves gone as yet.

wexie

not really seriously injured but hurt like hell

little razor sharp baby nails grabbing the inside of my nose.....got both nostrils!!

rizdub

my then 2 year old scratched the eyeball which took many days to heal..
headbutts are so common and once caused a lip cut...

jamesbondings

Brother in laws broken his nose twice by his 3 year old.... Generally due to tickles.... He deserved it if you ask me... Tickles are torture

supersheeps

Right now I have the remains of a black eye, the second that my almost 2yo has given me. He's also almost sprained my ankle by jumping on my leg, and has recently discovered biting. The worst is that he's put me in hospital...I have a port in my chest for getting chemotherapy, it's very small and doesn't protrude much. He headbutted me so hard in it that I was in agony and was admitted to a&e in case it had been cracked!
We're a bit afraid of what's ahead for him, he hasn't started torturing animals yet thankfully...

deisemum

I know a toddler who broke his mum's nose when he threw his head backwards and got her on the nose, he was 15 months at the time.

One of my friends broke her leg after one of her twins took his nappy off and pooped on the floor, my friend didn't see it, stepped in it, slipped and broke her leg.

ectoraige

One day when my daughter was three she was sitting on the stairs as my wife walked down them carrying our two-months old son. Our daughter, for whom the novelty of a younger sibling had worn off, decided to poked her foot out as my wife passed and tripped her. My wife managed to shield our son from hitting anything, but hurt her knee and shoulder in the process. The statute of limitations has now passed on the assault, but we still occasionally threaten that we'll have her charged for attempted murder.

fits

deisemum wrote: »

One of my friends broke her leg after one of her twins took his nappy off and pooped on the floor, my friend didn't see it, stepped in it, slipped and broke her leg.

Oh god. I’m imagining that scene.

Akrasia

My kids were always leading with their heads so I was always aware that they could strike at any moment so was ready to avoid them.

My wife on the other hand, seemed to be caught by surprise every time and got many many bangs to the face.

Brian?

So many punches to the balls and headbutts to the nose. Never anything that lasted though, thank god.

Neyite

Another one today.

His favourite way of getting me up is to bounce up and down on me. That was grand when he was two but when he's six and about 3/4 my own weight and height it's tougher on me.

This morning we were messing around with a tickle fight and bouncing on me and I had my leg at an awkward angle which he jumped on with his full weight. I honestly thought my hip had come out of it's socket and the pain was so bad my body was doing that white-hot-cold freezing thing. And I had to try to hide how bad it was because he'd get really upset and it was an accident anyway.

But while the hip is fine, the jolt or whatever buggered up my back, neck and down the arms somehow. I'm shuffling like an auld one about the place. If I've a dodgy hip in 25 years I know why.