That one thing from your past that makes you CRINGE!!

rawn

At a house party a few years ago. I was chatting to a girl there, she had really brightly dyed red hair piled up on top of her head, Amy Winehouse style. Anyways was chatting to her and she reached up to fix her hair and whatever way she did it her entire head of hair moved from side to side, drunken me loudly exclaims "oh is that a wig?!". Room went dead silent, she just looked at me in horror and said "NO". She was utterly disgusted with me and refused to speak to me again, but continued to sit beside me glowering. She was so utterly utterly offended that it still makes me cringe

Cee-Jay-Cee

Strabanimal wrote: »

I never mentioned sitting around telling them how good and helpful the police force are here. I talked about this incident in Belfast where I have lived the past 10 years.

More assumptions. Try again though.

Nope, you said and I quote "...I know from others telling me how they deal with situations. Far more helpful"

Maybe you didn't realise (as you were stoned/drunk at the time) but that means you were discussing how good and friendly they are.

Strabanimal wrote: »

I have friends in the PSNI, I know from others telling me how they deal with situations. Far more helpful.

Username exists

greenspurs wrote: »

Reminds me of my father in law - can be a bit blonde....

Away in spain on holidays - went into restaurant for grub.
Order our food, waiters comes to him ... Can I have breast of chicken? Waiter hasn't a clue - a breast of chicken my f.in l repeats... Still nothing from the waiter.

F in Law grabs his chest and motions squeezing, whilst saying Breast.... a breast of chicken.....

He ended up ordering a burger...

Thank god he wasn't looking for sausages.

StabiloBoss

Back in college many years ago I went over to my then girlfriend in the library. She was leaning forward on her chair and the top of her underwear was sticking out. I reached down and tweaked them and whispered 'very nice' in her ear.

Yeah. Wasn't her.

The Pheasant2

Thargor wrote: »

This poor cnut though, I often think of him, imagine having to go back and finish your course for another couple of years after this happening to you:

Had the privilege (?) of experiencing this live - poor bastard; he did actually transfer college as far as I'm aware (well that was what everyone said anyway)

jasonb

I can sometimes say something before my brain has filtered it...

Years ago I was in a chipper, I gave my order and then told them I'd be back in a minute. Went to leave the chipper and a woman with a lot of kids (I'd say 5 or 6) was coming in. It took a minute or two for them to come in, as they were young and easily distracted and she was trying to get them to get a move on. I caught her eye and we gave each other a knowing 'ah, kids' look, and after a minute they were all in and I got out.

So, a few minutes later I was coming back into the Chipper, and sure enough she and her family were coming out. Again it took them a minute or two to get themselves out the door, and once again we caught each other's eyes. This time she said 'I'm sorry about this, I should look into a baby-sitter or something' in a friendly way. I smiled and laughed and said, in an friendly way too, 'Yeah, or contraception!'. I could see her face fall as I walked into the chipper and my own fell a second later once I'd realised what I'd said. I'd honestly meant it in a laughing way, but it so didn't come across that way at all.

fussyonion

Sitting in my parents kitchen and my Dad was cooking a fry.
Instead of saying 'I'm hungry', I said 'Dad, I'm horny!'.

Foggy Jew

xabi wrote: »

nope

Yep. The bit about the student. Nope that I've never done anything cringeworthy. Friends of mine own a pub on the Main Street of a small town. 3 or 4 of us were getting ready in an upstairs bedroom for a 21st being held in the pub. We didn't have an ashtray, so we used a half full 7Up bottle for our ashes & butts. Fast forward several hours & we are in bed. My friend had stepped out of her lovely purple silk dress & it was lying on the floor. I reached for a drink in the middle of the night & took a swig out of the ashy, butty 7Up bottle. I puked. Down on top of the purple silk dress. I picked up the dress & took it and myself into the en-suite shower, where I did ran the shower, doing a little dance on the dress to try to wash the puke off it. Delighted with myself, I took the pukey sodden mess over to the window, outside of which there was a flag pole conveniently located. I dangled the dress off the flag pole in the hope it would dry & nobody would be any the wiser. It was spotted by my friends Dad early the following morning. You might say it all came out in the wash after that. Sad times. Sad times.

andreoilin

There's not enough paper in the world to make a list, but I'll give you this one. I went out with a lad when I was younger, things ended, grand. I was in town months after and spotted him so decided to go up and have a friendly chat. I was chatting away to him, asking how he was, what he was up to etc etc. He was being polite but acting kinda strange so I figured he must be finding it awkward. About 10 minutes into the conversation I realise it's not him I am speaking to but his twin. Quickly wrapped things up and legged it out of the shop. Mortified.

anewme

Doing up my first house...was on a blue binge....blue wall tiles, blue floor tiles, blue kettle, blue toaster, blue microwave, blue mugs, blue chairs, blue cushions.

All great at the time but after 7 or 8 years the blue is driving me mad and I hate it.

My sister and her husband came for dinner and I was moaning about the blue.

“What kind of fcking eejit buys a fcking blue microwave”

My sister stood up, looked at the microwave and proceeded to peel the protective blue film from the microwave, leaving a white microwave.

A few years later my bro in law saw article of Facebook or somewhere where a woman did that same with a fridge. She was getting slagged to bits. They kindly reminded me that I did it years earlier and did not cop it for seven years.

It was bittersweet cringe, after seven years I got a lovely new white microwave without having to spend a cent.

I’ve done quite a few cringey things actually, lost my car in the airport and indignantly rang up and said “it’s stolen” only for them to say - are you sure-- OF COURSE I’m sure, I’m not stupid ...only for the security guy to come out to find it at the opposite end of the very same row.

Another time I rang the clampers and said- how dare you clamp me - they said you are not clamped- I was, there was a yellow yoke on my wheel. Clamper was sent out and duly pointed out the yellow brake calipers on all 4 wheels. I’d had the car months and not noticed them.

Lorelli!

andreoilin wrote: »

There's not enough paper in the world to make a list, but I'll give you this one. I went out with a lad when I was younger, things ended, grand. I was in town months after and spotted him so decided to go up and have a friendly chat.

Ugh that reminds me, i know its bad but I was young. I kind of ghosted someone I'd been out with a few times when I was around 17

About a year later, my parents were only in their early 40's at the time and we went out for dinner and stopped by at a pub and it was near where he lived but I didn't think anything of it. My dad knew these lads that were there so we sat with them but it turned out one of them was friends with him and he came in about a half an hour after us. I had to sit there for about 3 hours directly across from him with my mam nudging me every five minutes saying "what's wrong with you Lorelli? Why are you so quiet tonight?"

mordeith

I worker at a public desk for a few years and there was this old lad who used to come in regularly. He was always making jokes and chatting away. I was transferred to a different department and didn't see him for a couple of years. I was back at the old desk for a random day some while later and said man comes in. Nice greeting, lots of 'good to see you again'. I ask him if he's any news and he said his son died. Naturally I think he's joking and burst out laughing into his face before saying 'good one' and walking off into the back office where a colleague informs me it's true. I couldn't go back out to face him.

ERG89

Hector Bellend wrote:

My most embarrassing school moment was recorded and broadcast on national TV.

Anyone here ever on Quizone?
Now those are war stories I need to hear :pac:

griffin100

Giving a lecture to a couple of hundred Ag. students, a pretty tough bunch at the best of times. Was speaking for about 20minites, going well I thought, when I turned back and realised that whilst I could see the slides on my laptop in front of me I hadn't turned the projector on so the screens behind me were blank. None of the b@stards had said anything and let me ramble on. I was mortified, had to try and recover and make it look like I knew all along they couldn't see the slides and I preferred to lecture without PowerPoint as 'PowerPoint is boring'. Cringe.

jimmycrackcorm

In the late eighties I wore tartan jeans and thought they were cool.

sunnysoutheast

When I was about 13 I was at a friend's house for a Sunday afternoon and they had a really lovely 2/3-size snooker/billiards table.

I wasn't exactly great at cue sports. In front of my friend, his parents, his younger sister and her friend I managed to make a foot-long tear in the cloth, right on the D. His parents were all "never mind" but I could see the anguish and regret in their eyes.

What made it even worse is that we then had to sit through Sunday dinner.

the purple tin

In the dim and distant school days, getting my backside whacked at different times over the years in front of the class, you would be left with a red arse and a redder face.
A nun bared my butt and put me across her lap once, but thankfully that was during playtime and not in front of witnesses

Foggy Jew

the purple tin wrote: »

In the dim and distant school days, getting my backside whacked at different times over the years in front of the class, you would be left with a red arse and a redder face.
A nun bared my butt and put me across her lap once, but thankfully that was during playtime and not in front of witnesses

Geez. You should ring the Lahv Line. 1850 715815. Joe Duffy has been getting his rocks off in recent days with this sort of thing.

'Performed' a solo concert at a mid-90's Battle of the Bands. Necked a tonne of vodka beforehand. The five-minute set consisted of an angry version of 'Ask' (Smiths) and me screaming "Jocks! Rednecks! Jocks" in an act of rebellion against my middle-Ireland surroundings. I had to be almost dragged off the stage.

More than 20 years later, and I still cringe. Thankfully it occurred in a pre-smart phone era.