Who is this forum for?

Sleeper12

vetinari wrote:

Newsflash for posters that have kids older than 5. Your advice on issues like burping or settling the baby is useful. Any advice related to the stress of being a first time parent is useless. Absolutely useless. I have friends with 18 month old babies who've completely forgotten the newborn experience. They've just moved onto a different set of problems.

I have to disagree with this part of your opening post. I'm 50 & my kids are in their mid 20s yet I remember how they stressful young babies can be. Especially your first. Even my own mam who's in her 80's would be very sympathetic towards new parents.

Look, posters on boards.ie tend to be very judgemental. For many it's not about giving advice but winning an argument.

I remember the sleepless nights, crankyness & a wee bit of post natal depression, a few nights in Temple Street hospital. I remember the joy of my mam taking our baby overnight. The joy of getting a full night's sleep!

You are not alone. Please don't let posters on boards.ie have you thinking that you can't get advice or support from someone older.

Young babies can be hard work. As they say it takes a village to raise a child

shesty

I didn't think you got that many grandparents!I thought it was mainly parents(ie those with no grandkids) who replied....
And those first few months are etched in your brain no matter how many years it's been.So etched in fact that when second and subsequent children arrive you dread the chaos and sleep deprivation and plan as best you can for just survival.But it doesn't last forever.

knucklehead6

I think I’ll hang around until a mod gets here and checks if their “Is poster being a dick-o-meter”

iamwhoiam

shesty wrote: »

I didn't think you got that many grandparents!I thought it was mainly parents(ie those with no grandkids) who replied....
And those first few months are etched in your brain no matter how many years it's been.So etched in fact that when second and subsequent children arrive you dread the chaos and sleep deprivation and plan as best you can for just survival.But it doesn't last forever.

Well I am a grandparent and my advice was to open up the channels with conversation . To ask his mum to take the baby for a walk , to ask his mum if she would hold the baby while the mum had a shower etc . But apparently this was judgemental and bitter ? I also suggested that just maybe his mum was anxious to get close to the baby because she would miss him too much when leaving . Apparently this is being bitter and unwanted advice . So much for the village helping out

nazzy

Sleeper12 wrote:

Look, posters on boards.ie tend to be very judgemental. For many it's not about giving advice but winning an argument.

I agree with this.

I think people need to take a step back and cut the op a bit of slack. The baby is 7 weeks old. I think we learn a lot about ourselves in the first few months of a baby's life. He might look back in six months and wonder why he made an issue of this, it might make more sense then.

And in six years, he might remember the tough first few months. Or he might not. I don't think every sentence of the post needs to be dissected or criticised. He was looking for some support and reassurance. Or understanding.

Parenthood is a huge learning curve. The smallest things can seem huge in these early stages. Even with all the support in the world.

Moonbeam

*mod note*

This thread has caused enough offence.

OP- I think many people here with kids over 5 know exactly what it is like to have a newborn a lot also had other kids close in age to mind too.
DO not open another thread on the same subject.