18 month old getting impatient and upset at food being prepared

ally_pally

Hi all, my 18 month old girl is a fantastic eater. She loves all food and will eat anything we give her so she has a wide and varied diet. You would think that would lead to easy happy mealtimes but unfortunately that's not always the case.

She will happily go hours without looking for or asking for food. But the minute she sees someone else with food, she gets really upset. Even if she's just had a meal, she will get upset if she sees food that she doesn't immediately get to have. This is at its worst when either me or her dad is getting her food ready for her. It might take two minutes to get her milk and porridge ready in the morning but she'll cling onto our legs crying while we're doing so and sometimes she ends up really upset and crying during mealtimes as she's gotten so upset beforehand.

We try to calm her and go through a reassuring routine of getting her into her high chair, getting her bib on, giving her a drink - all things that she knows mean her breakfast or lunch or dinner is on its way. But it's generally to no avail.

I don't think it's the case that she's starving when it comes to mealtime as she would very rarely indicate that she's hungry. Even in the mornings, she would be so content to play in her cot or in her room for a while after she wakes and we have lovely happy mornings together getting her dressed, playing, singing songs. It's when she sees food that she goes crazy!

Has anyone gone through anything similar and would you have any suggestions? I know it's not the biggest problem in the world and maybe it's the kind of thing that will improve when she understands more and more what we're telling her, that her food is on its way very soon etc. But we hate seeing her get so upset so would love any advice.

shesty

Don't wait for her to show signs of hunger firstly Just have your meals at set times, so you can manage her hunger!.Toddlers go from ok to starvation in the blink of an eye, and as I heard said once, they are often the last ones to realise
they are hungry.

I find giving them a cracker or breadstick to have while you are making food helps a lot.Also don't sit her in her chair until you are literally ready to set the plate on the table (they have zero patience).At 18 mths, I would not expect her to sit and wait long for a meal.I should add some are more impatient than others (I have one!) And for your own sanity, it's better not to sit them up until the meal is right there.

Toddlers should be eating every two-three hours.Small healthy snacks between meals are key.Going hours without asking for food means she's probably just distracted, and once she sees the food she realises she's starving.They don't know what the pain in their stomach means, they just know they don't feel right.

As for wanting what other kids have, that's just a feature of being a toddler I'm afraid.You could say "no that's X's food', or offer her a couple of raisins or something instead if you wanted.She will still have her meltdown but it will get better as she gets older.

loadwire

Ours is coming up to 18 months, she does the same leg pulling thing when i'm getting her food ready. Maybe I'm a walkover but I generally lift her up and cook one-handed and explain whatever it is I'm doing. If I've to do something dangerous or that I need two hands for I'll tell her I've to put her down for a minute. I take it as a healthy interest in how her food is made. Then when it's ready I bring the food over and put her in the high chair at that stage.

ally_pally

Thanks both, really useful advice. We don’t wait until she’s hungry to feed her and we definitely have set meal times. But we probably haven’t been giving her enough snacks. She’s on the 98th percentile for weight and at every check up I have the PHN giving me a serious talking to about her weight. I shouldn’t take it to heart but I do. We give her such healthy food, she eats very well but we’ve probably been too cautious in not giving her enough snacks.

shesty

Excuse me for asking this but does she look overweight?Is she a tall child?From what you're saying, has she always been in the 98th percentile for weight?

ally_pally

She’s 50th percentile for height so she’s not especially tall or short. She doesn’t look overweight, no, at least not to me. She’s always been around that centile for weight although I think she might have dropped down to the 91st based on weighing her at home recently (first time I’ve done it, I’m not obsessed with her weight despite how I sound here). She’s always comfortably fitted into clothes that are for her actual age - she’s never been one of those babies who was 6 months old wearing 12 month clothes. To me, she’s healthy and in proportion and a very very active child.

shesty

Fair enough-what I was going to say was unless she's actually overweight, I don't think you can "underfeed" her to drop down to a lower percentile-not that I think you were doing that.PHNs can get hung up on percentiles.But she does need some healthy snacks in between meals, we would do a mid-morning snack and a mid-afternoon one...Also if you don't, you will probably notice her behaviour deteriorate a bit as she gets hungry, especially as she really hits the toddler years!!!