Have you any requests for when you die?

fryup

i want to be cremated and i want this played in the background

Malayalam

fryup wrote: »

i want to be cremated and i want this played in the background

This will be even cooler if you pre-book outfits that look just like the ones in that video for the mourners and everyone has to jive and do pistol fingers in the aisles.

fryup

^^^^^^^^^^^

great idea, i'm adding that to my final requests

Irish Guitarist

I want to star as Bernie in Weekend At Bernies 3.

Yer Da sells Avon

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Are you planning a painful afterlife?

When I assume room temperature, they can bury me, burn me, bugger me, whatever. I just want those last days to be spent high on morphine.

fergiesfolly

Purgative wrote: »

I just said if its bin week, stick me in the grey bin.

Brown surely.
Or, aren't you compostable?

riffmongous

I dont get the song requests, why not just get the priest to remind everyone what a full time mad bastard you were during the eulogy?

Anesthetize

I want to be cremated. Then I want a batch of cocaine to be cut with my ashes, and the batch to be sold around Dublin.

ZX7R

I want to be buried upside down,
So the whole world can kiss my ass......

TheValeyard

Id like to bring ye all with me

ouxbbkqtswdfaw

I can't understand people who want stage manage their funeral, how they'd like to be remembered etc. A load of egotism. When you're dead, you won't care or know anything. Everything is irrelevant to you, whether you are a spiritual person or not.

ouxbbkqtswdfaw

It's interesting to see that young people are are more keen on cremation, seeing that it's not environmentally friendly.

Foweva Awone

Richard Hillman wrote: »

No to an open casket. I do not want my corpse paraded.

That's a big one for me. Ugh, the thoughts of people looking at me, and even TOUCHING me, and not being able to stop them ... just, NOPE!

(Not joking about the touching part - I've even seen people KISSING corpses at wakes - it's so not okay!)

freshpopcorn

Richard Hillman wrote: »

No to an open casket. I do not want my corpse paraded.

They did that at the side of the canal.
What did Gail do with you?

Conall Cernach

If ever I come into a pile of money it would be good craic to be buried like the Atlantean king in Conan The Barbarian (the Arnie one) just to mess with future archeologists.

redshoes15

Play the Goodbye song from Bear & the Big Blue House. I’m 39 and deadly serious. Would like to give the couple of mourners one final giggle. If I can do that, job done

RobbingBandit

DNR

jos28

Have a 3 day hooley and then put me in one of these

https://www.thelivingurn.com/pages/tree-zip-code

Bitches Be Trypsin

I'm an organ donor and it's something really important to me. It's likely I'll die in my 40s as my health is deteriorating quite quickly, so my organs may not be suitable for donation, so in that case my body will be given to RCSI. I definitely don't want anything religious or a funeral, but I don't mind if my family have a service for themselves.

I have no particular interest in where my remains will go when RCSI finishes with them.

Capt'n Midnight

ACADasltiv wrote: »

When I inevitably choke to death feeding my gummy bear addiction, I hope they say I was killed by bears and just leave it at that.

You should switch to the sugar free ones.

Sycamore Tree

Colonel Claptrap wrote: »

I have donated my body to medical science.

It's a very easy process. Just contact your local university, fill in some forms and get your next of kin to witness your signature. Once you pop your clogs make sure your family remember to contact the university and not the funeral home.

Assuming you're not mangled in a car wreck they will accept your remains as long as they are relatively in tact. Your cadaver will be assigned to a medical student for a year or two.

When they are finished with your remains, your family will be contacted. They will pay for a burial/cremation and hold a secular ceremony to honour your gift to the university. There is a communal plot for donors in Glasnevin cemetery I believe.

Do they pay all of the burial costs? I thought it was a percentage.

This is all good but can be quite difficult on the family. Firstly the university will claim the body quite fast (24-36 hours) and secondly the family will not get "closure" until they bury the body 2-3 years after death (time depends on the quality of the corpse). It's worth discussing why you want to do it with all close family members before you die.

KevinCavan

Rubberchikken wrote: »

Am donating body to science (heaven help them), and then cremation of whats left whenever theyre finished digging and poking around it.

Ohhh I would hate that myself.

KevinCavan

moonage wrote: »

I want to be sure my loved ones will never be short of pens when I'm gone.

Brilliant!

KevinCavan

Is it €5000 to bury somebody now, I mean the funeral services? Then you have to buy a grave plot, kerb it and put a headstone on it. Don’t know if I can afford to die!:-)

AndrewJRenko

I used to have a playlist for tunes for the non-religious party, but I let that slip. I found a nice reading from the Log Lady in the Twin Peaks Final Dossier this week, so I might fit that in.

Donate any organs (should be compulsory really), might give it over to the med students. I ran into a schoolmate who had done one year's dentistry in Trinity who asked me 'were you one of the ones that I brought in to the dead bodies?'.

Sprinkle the ashes on the top of Three Rock, with a view over the city. Missus isn't sure she'll make it up the hill. Her loss.

RabbleRouser2k

Cremation, no ceremony.

My beliefs are my own, and that's fine and all. But I've lost pets, and animals I've care about... And it's heartbreaking to lose em.
But in the end, we're all going into the ground. And I just don't want to be remembered, I just want to go in the earth.
Maybe spread my ashes somewhere close to my childhood home.

DEFTLEFTHAND

Sycamore Tree wrote: »

Do they pay all of the burial costs? I thought it was a percentage.

This is all good but can be quite difficult on the family. Firstly the university will claim the body quite fast (24-36 hours) and secondly the family will not get "closure" until they bury the body 2-3 years after death (time depends on the quality of the corpse). It's worth discussing why you want to do it with all close family members before you die.

Is it that quick? I knew somebody who had their funeral before being taken away to be used as a cadaver.

This was about 2010.

Sycamore Tree

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Is it that quick? I knew somebody who had their funeral before being taken away to be used as a cadaver.

This was about 2010.

Funeral mass you mean? That can be organised fairly fast depending on time of death. It doesn't leave much time to let people know. Yeah they usually want the bodies before 36 hours for decomposition reasons. The undertakers can take the coffin straight from the church or home to the university.

2-3 years later, people tend to have another mass before the actual burial. I imagine it's an odd experience for the family.

Gael23

Cremation then black bin.

DEFTLEFTHAND

Sycamore Tree wrote: »

Funeral mass you mean? That can be organised fairly fast depending on time of death. It doesn't leave much time to let people know. Yeah they usually want the bodies before 36 hours for decomposition reasons. The undertakers can take the coffin straight from the church or home to the university.

2-3 years later, people tend to have another mass before the actual burial. I imagine it's an odd experience for the family.

Yeah that's what happened with the person I knew. The undertakers took the body to the University directly from the church.

Everybody stood outside the church and the hearse slowly drove out the gate with family and friends waving goodbye. I found it quite moving.

freshpopcorn

KevinCavan wrote: »

Is it €5000 to bury somebody now, I mean the funeral services? Then you have to buy a grave plot, kerb it and put a headstone on it. Don’t know if I can afford to die!:-)

It all depends on what you choose to be honest.
I know of you have a grave the funeral home, coffin, church, engraving of the headstone(because one was already in place) came to about €3000 a few years ago.

corner of hells

I'm planning on having a trial run funeral just to see who turns up.

The ones that don't bother their hole turning up will be left nothing in the will.

worded

Id like to be catapulted into the sea or put in a rocket and blasted off into space, either will do.

If money isn't an issue, then my body shot out into space would be rather sweet. A cosmic journey. Nice.

If money is an issue (which is more likely, tbh), cremation with the ashes thrown into the Atlantic.

freshpopcorn

corner of hells wrote: »

I'm planning on having a trial run funeral just to see who turns up.

The ones that don't bother their hole turning up will be left nothing in the will.

That sound like a story line in Coronation Street a few years ago.

PlaneSpeeking

Bitches Be Trypsin wrote: »

I'm an organ donor and it's something really important to me. It's likely I'll die in my 40s as my health is deteriorating quite quickly, so my organs may not be suitable for donation, so in that case my body will be given to RCSI. I definitely don't want anything religious or a funeral, but I don't mind if my family have a service for themselves.

I have no particular interest in where my remains will go when RCSI finishes with them.

I work here - they're cremated and we have a lovely service to thank the family members of those who donated.

Thank you, it's a lovely selfless gesture that.

PlaneSpeeking

freshpopcorn wrote: »

That sound like a story line in Coronation Street a few years ago.

Ross in Friends did a hilarious one!

One of the rare times Friends was funny.

I have stolen my death request from another boardsie because it would so work on some people I know.

I use my phone. A lot. So I want to be buried with it. I want it to be specifically noted in fact that I am being buried with it. I will not however be buried with my SIM Card. Which no one else will know.

My lawyer however - being the only other person in on the whole thing and the one actually in possession of my SIM Card - will 48 hours later start to text and phone people on a list I have prepared.

bnt

Rhyme wrote: »

Bury me with some acorns so that in a few hundred years when the tree blows down, they find my skeleton tangled up in the roots. Awesome.

I'm thinking something like that - plant a tree over my head, though acorns might do as well. That would mean no embalming, since the chemicals could pollute the ground.

Greentree_uk

turn off the immersion

DEFTLEFTHAND

Natural burials seems to be getting popular these days.

No coffin in the grave, just a shroud, and obviously no embalming or anything like that. Just wash the body. Burial I presume within two days of death if that's feasible.

A return to nature in a sense.

Feisar

Organs donated, after that I don't care what they do with the scrap meat.

Yester

My body will never be found.

Oink

When I was a kid I saw them take my grandfather’s bones out and put them respectfully in a bin-shaped, bin-coloured container, so they could bury my grandmother.

So my main request is: when I’m dead please don’t put me in a fuccking bin like Granda.

Just take whatever spare parts you want and cremate me.