Lahvlann: Now down the reek with a plastic yellow duck - 28th Sep forward

ButtersSuki

TWODAY'S De Brand NEW & IMPROVED so to speak 2-18 Joe Duffy Wurkday Calculator and dat:



Wurkdays in 2-18 and dat: 209
Joe Shows: 169
No Show Joe Shows: 40
Breakeens 4 Joe: 40
PBH (de full-time host of de show) Shows: 33
PBH guest appearances and dat: 1
D'Omen Shows: 5
AN Udder Shows: 0
Good Fryday No Show by nobody at all at all: 1
De Budget Day No Show by nobody at all at all: 1


NEW FEATURE SO TO SPEAK:
Fateen's Estimated Fees (De FEF Matrix so to speak) to date dis year:
AT LEAST €422,500*

(not including de EXTRA FEES for 3 days of De Beast From De East TV + Radio Simulcast Xtravaganza + likely "Danger Money" for travelling to and from wurk in de snow and dat nor d'expenses for driving, vittels and de overnightin' often mere days in advance of a FunnyFryday. Wurking class man wit de wurking class wurk ettic and dat.

*de fees are calculated at €2,500 per show x days dat Fateen is in so to speak. Dose fees are likely conservative and outdated as day are 2 years old so to speak.
I'm including Good Fryday as a Wurkday as it is not an official Bank Holiday/Holiday Day. Even Pat Kenny is in Newstalk FFS, but no-one in RTE of course of course.

Dare's nuttin' funny about a FUNNYFRYDAY.

sligojoek

Down 7,000

https://amp.independent.ie/entertainment/radio/jnlrs-rte-radio-1s-marian-finucane-and-sean-orourke-see-highest-gains-as-losses-dominate-at-today-fm-and-newstalk-37457694.html

Odyssey 2005

ButtersSuki wrote: »

I do. Unlike most I have actually listened to a full FUNNYFRYDAY, rather than bailing within 3minutes like most listeners. I did it purely for research purposes, and it was torture so to speak.

My comments were in relation to the horse****e we were served up today. A greater load of drivel you couldn't imagine....until tomorrow :rolleyes:

sligojoek

It was quare bad today too. I lasted about 20 minutes

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

Down 7,000

https://amp.independent.ie/entertainment/radio/jnlrs-rte-radio-1s-marian-finucane-and-sean-orourke-see-highest-gains-as-losses-dominate-at-today-fm-and-newstalk-37457694.html

Remember when O'Leary was on?
MOL: Ryanair transport 400,000 people a day
Joe: Yea? and I have 400,000 listeners.

You have 374,000 actually Joe.......and that's an increase on last year when you made your 400,000 listeners.

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

It was quare bad today too. I lasted about 20 minutes

Only on a Friday can you safely say "dat's de wurst Lahv Lahn dis week"; because no matter how boring, bad, misery-laden or grotesque a Monday-Thursday show is, there's still shows left dat week to be wurser, so to speak.

sligojoek

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Remember when O'Leary was on?
MOL: Ryanair transport 400,000 people a day
Joe: Yea? and I have 400,000 listeners.

You have 374,000 actually Joe.......and that's an increase on last year when you made your 400,000 listeners.

Pity O Leary wasn't quick enough to tell him that moving 400,000 people from country to country takes a bit more ingenuity than sitting on your hole spouting sh1te into a microphone to an audience that would be there no matter who was doing it.

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

Pity O Leary wasn't quick enough to tell him that moving 400,000 people from country to country takes a bit more ingenuity than sitting on your hole spouting sh1te into a microphone to an audience that would be there no matter who was doing it.

He wasn't even listening to Fateen at de time; he was texting the legal team to make sure they had pressed record and to have the draft libellous writ ready for him to sign when he got off de fone and dat.

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

Pity O Leary wasn't quick enough to tell him that moving 400,000 people from country to country takes a bit more ingenuity than sitting on your hole spouting sh1te into a microphone to an audience that would be there no matter who was doing it.

And also that O'Leary can move 400,000 peeple internationally cheaper dan RTE can move de FUNNYFRYDAY "talent" and RTE support staff 30mins down de road to Draw-da and dat. They're all being wined and dined as we speak one suspects wit a little lie-in in de morning to prepare dem for the 75mins "wurk" tamarra and dat.

thecretinhop

at dara o briain had a good snipe at joe. lol nearly fell of my chair well done darra well done! (sees wat i did there)

ButtersSuki

thecretinhop wrote: »

at dara o briain had a good snipe at joe. lol nearly fell of my chair well done darra well done! (sees wat i did there)

Two questions:
1. Wat did he say?
2. Is he available for a nixer tamarra in Draw-da at 1:45?

thecretinhop

wont ruin joke
but said: imagine being in a car trapped and having to listen to joe duffy! christ almighty!

close to biggest laugh of night and some guy (not me) sais hes rubbish and a big cheer went up. made my night!

sligojoek

thecretinhop wrote: »

wont ruin joke
but said: imagine being in a car trapped and having to listen to joe duffy! christ almighty!

close to biggest laugh of night and some guy (not me) sais hes rubbish and a big cheer went up. made my night!

Where was this? He's in Sligo tomorrow or Saturday night. I probably won't be able to go as I've to see a few different bands over the weekend. My brother, who I haven't met in 6 months, is arriving and we've a lot of catching up to do. We'd probably get thrown out for talking.

thecretinhop

sligojoek wrote: »

thecretinhop wrote: »

wont ruin joke
but said: imagine being in a car trapped and having to listen to joe duffy! christ almighty!

close to biggest laugh of night and some guy (not me) sais hes rubbish and a big cheer went up. made my night!

Where was this? He's in Sligo tomorrow or Saturday night. I probably won't be able to go as I've to see a few different bands over the weekend. My brother, who I haven't met in 6 months, is arriving and we've a lot of catching up to do. We'd probably get thrown out for talking.

tonight caller in de luvely sligo hes in de uuuuk 2mrw

thecretinhop

he also did a spoof phone call to joe impression
about Bernie who was complaining about the crash

sligojoek

thecretinhop wrote: »

tonight caller in de luvely sligo hes in de uuuuk 2mrw

You should have called for tay and coddle. I thought he was here over the weekend.

SEPT 23 1989

sligojoek wrote: »

Down 7,000

https://amp.independent.ie/entertainment/radio/jnlrs-rte-radio-1s-marian-finucane-and-sean-orourke-see-highest-gains-as-losses-dominate-at-today-fm-and-newstalk-37457694.html

his target audience are not turning off they are dying

sligojoek

Of old age and boredom

Rock Lesnar

Im right beside the D Hotel now and theres not 1 person here waiting for the stars to arrive, all i can say is wow

zell12

Rock Lesnar wrote: »

Im right beside the D Hotel now and theres not 1 person here waiting for the stars to arrive, all i can say is wow

Say it like Joe says it!

HeidiHeidi

Rock Lesnar wrote: »

Im right beside the D Hotel now and theres not 1 person here waiting for the stars to arrive, all i can say is wow

Ah, but you're there, aren't you?


Ya little groupie! :D

zell12

HeidiHeidi wrote: »

Ah, but you're there, aren't you?
Ya little groupie! :D

Little camping chair, sleeping bag and cup of soup

Rock Lesnar

Unfortunately i cant wait around, i'd love to but i have a life

ButtersSuki

Rock Lesnar wrote: »

Im right beside the D Hotel now and theres not 1 person here waiting for the stars to arrive, all i can say is wow

Arrive? They checked in at 3:45 yesterday afternoon! They’re still in bed.

HeidiHeidi

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Arrive? They checked in at 3:45 yesterday afternoon! They’re still in bed.

Dey must have taken de Gubbermint Jet to get there that quick :eek:

sligojoek

thecretinhop wrote: »

tonight caller in de luvely sligo hes in de uuuuk 2mrw

Turns out he was in my local afterwards. I'd normally have been there but I'm sparing myself and my shillings for the weekend.

ButtersSuki

HeidiHeidi wrote: »

Dey must have taken de Gubbermint Jet to get there that quick :eek:

Leave Montrose at 3:00:01 yesterday, East link followed by port tunnel, M1, check in by 3:45 no problem. Not much traffic at 3pm, Draw-da is down de road Heidi so it is so to speak. Fateen doesn’t do rush hour.

2smiggy

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Leave Montrose at 3:00:01 yesterday, East link followed by port tunnel, M1, check in by 3:45 no problem. Not much traffic at 3pm, Draw-da is down de road Heidi so it is so to speak. Fateen doesn’t do rush hour.

will he make it back to Dublin for Tuesday's show ?

ButtersSuki

2smiggy wrote: »

will he make it back to Dublin for Tuesday's show ?

Which Tuesday?

Rock Lesnar

Just left the shopping centre and ders a few old boys and girls there now

ButtersSuki

Heidi, Fateen just said Draw-da is "turty foyve minutes from Dubalin" so if you leave now you'll be dare in plenty of time for de show and dat.

Promo was brutal. I'd really love to tell de tool who duz de impressions dat dat's not an Eddie Murphy impression, it's a donkey from Shrek impression. To use a couple of Fateen-isms, dat's not his real voyis and he doesn't do dat accent all de toyme so to speak.

ButtersSuki

Rock Lesnar wrote: »

Just left the shopping centre and ders a few old boys and girls there now

Sounds like a good place to re-enact some scenes from cult movie, Death Race 2000 (original, not de remake). I did see it as a chisler and I'm still scarred Joe.

HeidiHeidi

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Heidi, Fateen just said Draw-da is "turty foyve minutes from Dubalin" so if you leave now you'll be dare in plenty of time for de show and dat.

I've a kettle here that needs urgent descaling all of a sudden. Oh dear.

zell12

LOIVE on RTÉ1 TV 21:45 Saturday
Joe Duffy tells Ray D'Arcy about making his Panto debut as the Magic Mirror in Snow White at the Tivoli Theatre.

HeidiHeidi

zell12 wrote: »

LOIVE on RTÉ1 TV 21:45 Saturday
Joe Duffy tells Ray D'Arcy about making his Panto debut as the Magic Mirror in Snow White at the Tivoli Theatre.

Well it'll be LOIVE-er than Joe's actual "appearance" in the panto, that's for sure.

ButtersSuki

zell12 wrote: »

LOIVE on RTÉ1 TV 21:45 Saturday
Joe Duffy tells Ray D'Arcy about making his Panto debut as the Magic Mirror in Snow White at the Tivoli Theatre.

RTÉ, supporting the Arts RTÉ employee's contractor's nixers and dat.

So basically Dis Panto will get tens of thousands of euro worth of FREE ADVERTISING on Prime Time on a Saturday Night by virtue of de fact dat Fateen is involved - and for no udder reason. It seems Sammy Sausages and Karl are savvy enough when they "just happened to think of Joe", never of course thinkin g about deeze ancillary benefits so to speak.......

ButtersSuki

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Sounds like a good place to re-enact some scenes from cult movie, Death Race 2000 (original, not de remake). I did see it as a chisler and I'm still scarred Joe.

It's a movie Joe would most certainly not approve of......

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGhu5Zl5ry8

ButtersSuki

https://twitter.com/joeliveline/status/1055730745602379776


And de circle jerk continues....as well as de puns.

ButtersSuki

Dare's camp and dare's camp.......

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ow1M2smr2Nc

WARNING: You can't un-see dis.

ButtersSuki

HeidiHeidi wrote: »

I've a kettle here that needs urgent descaling all of a sudden. Oh dear.

Do you need a hand?

somesoldiers

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Rock Lesnar wrote: »

Just left the shopping centre and ders a few old boys and girls there now

Sounds like a good place to re-enact some scenes from cult movie, Death Race 2000 (original, not de remake). I did see it as a chisler and I'm still scarred Joe.

Or Mr Mercedes

Oops69

Has the man any dignity left ?

zell12

Oops69

He sounds like June Rogers before the menopause in that sketch

buried

FAHHK

Dan Jaman

"92, Joe. And I remember the first time I heard Syl Fox's routine."

HeidiHeidi

Aaaaaaaand, that's me out.


Byeeeeee!!!

zell12

It's LOIVE via webcam?

JMNolan

Funny Friday, is it? Ah well, spotify for me so.

Dan Jaman

<desperately grabs for off button>

Ah, daz betterer.

That crap was enough to drive me out of the house and down to the polling station.