Can't get baby to nap

Beanybabog

My 5 month old has been sleeping terribly for the last few weeks. We have managed to get him to fall asleep in his own bed at night and he has reduced his night awakenings to 2 and will go back to bed after (it was every 90 mins) but I am struggling getting him to nap. I tried for an hour and a half today and he got more distressed. I won't just leave him to cry but even my usual soothing techniques are starting to not work. I have a two year old so I can't leave her alone for hours at a time to try get him to nap nor can I go out in the buggy every time he needs a sleep. Any advice welcome!

Anne_cordelia

How long after he wakes are you trying to get him to sleep? Could he be overtired?

Beanybabog

Anne_cordelia wrote: »

How long after he wakes are you trying to get him to sleep? Could he be overtired?

I've been making an effort to get him down 1.5-2 hours after he wakes. It's kind of hard to know because he tends to feed and doze in the morning so I'm not always sure what his final wake time is

GreeBo

I wouldnt keep trying for 90 minutes, if they dont go off after 15-20 mins then its just not going to happen.


Is he showing signs of tiredness, rubbing eyes, yawning etc?
If he isnt then I think you arent going to get anywhere with a nap.

If he is, then (from what I am currently experiencing!) its always bloody trapped wind.

Are you napping him in his own bed or somewhere else? Is he roaring or just making noises to himself?

My daughter will often make a lot of noise when she first goes down, but its not full on crying, though sometimes she will shout out or whimper but she is basically self soothing.

Is there anything in the room that would be preventing sleep?
Equally, is there something in the room that would distract him enough to fall asleep?

We use a woombie sleep sack like this one, and other than making her look like a strange alter boy, it really helps her sleep. Without it she keeps waking herself by either startling or rubbing her face.
We also got a little light the projects shapes onto the wall/ceiling to keep her amused.

Beanybabog

I think you're probably right about the wind Greebo, he is quite farty and just did a big poo and always struggles to sleep when his poop is coming. Only problem he's still up now and I have a toddler to mind and I'm not quite sure what to do with him. He was used to breastfeeding to sleep / sleeping in my bed because what I thought was a mere growth spurt turned into the full grown sleep regression

ThunbergsAreGo

Beanybabog wrote: »

I think you're probably right about the wind Greebo, he is quite farty and just did a big poo and always struggles to sleep when his poop is coming. Only problem he's still up now and I have a toddler to mind and I'm not quite sure what to do with him. He was used to breastfeeding to sleep / sleeping in my bed because what I thought was a mere growth spurt turned into the full grown sleep regression

He was about 1 before we got ours to nap on his own.

Before it was a combination of singing/slinging/rocking/cuddling till we went down and the stealthy drop to the bed/cot.

Its a tricky thing to do, even trickier with a toddler. Could you use a baby sling and have him sleep on you?

Good luck!!!

Beanybabog

I don’t think a sling will work, he will hardly feed if he’s not in a quiet room lying down, his sister is very distracting!!
He also will no longer nap on people’s laps/ shoulder etc. The only other way he naps is the car seat or pram but again in limited- when my daughter was this fussy I used to just pound the streets with her but now she’s big she doesn’t want to sit in a pram for ages

GreeBo

I was going to suggest a sling alright, but some kids dont like being in it.

My daughter will hang in it for me and fall asleep but not for her mum!

She has had a few bad bouts of wind the last few weeks (shes 4.5 months) at night and she will just cry and cry even though she is tired.

Its *always* wind and 'just' needs to be worked out, which I find over my shoulder or face down over my lap the best approaches.

We focus on getting a burp or fart out of her and dont worry about trying to soothe her or get her to sleep, as soon as she pops she is out like a light anyway.
Have you tried the bicycle legs approach to getting farty wind out? Most nights I will spend a few minutes bringing both her feet up towards her mouth, if she starts grunting I know she has wind and it will usually come out in all its glory after a few mins of this!

Beanybabog

Thanks greebo, funny we have been struggling with wind too. I think it’s the teeth and I have to exercise him a lot to work it out. I think this morning was probably bad because of the poop coming (he’s breastfed so doesn’t poop very often) but normally he isn’t great at going down anyway. I really need to tackle it because I literally can’t manage, and I spend ages helping him asleep and then he wakes after 45 minutes!!

fits

Beanybabog wrote: »

Thanks greebo, funny we have been struggling with wind too. I think it’s the teeth and I have to exercise him a lot to work it out. I think this morning was probably bad because of the poop coming (he’s breastfed so doesn’t poop very often) but normally he isn’t great at going down anyway. I really need to tackle it because I literally can’t manage, and I spend ages helping him asleep and then he wakes after 45 minutes!!

I think you are nearly hitting the stage when they do one longer nap. Hopefully it’s just a transition period.

I still find it difficult trying to get one to nap when the other is not sleepy so you have my sympathies. There are good easy days and harder days too.

bee06

It could be the 4 month sleep regression as well. My baby is horrendous for get to sleep for naps during a sleep regression.

Beanybabog

bee06 wrote: »

It could be the 4 month sleep regression as well. My baby is horrendous for get to sleep for naps during a sleep regression.

It is but it’s been going on a while now. I just fed him in bed (my daughters down for her nap so o can) put him down and he gave out stink but I gave lots of kisses and now he’s calm. Fingers crossed! I haven’t got dressed or had my breakfast and my daughter watched waaaay too much telly this morning, it’s days like this I really feel I’m failing at this

Beanybabog

Sorry fits do you mean two naps? He said only 5 months

bee06

I know that feeling but you’re not failing! Just remind yourself that everything is just a phase and will change again at some stage. It’s hard not knowing when though.

mirrorwall14

Try first nap earlier. Our first lad barely managed an hour in the mornings for a good year. If we delayed it became a battle. First sign of tiredness he went straight down

Beanybabog

mirrorwall14 wrote: »

Try first nap earlier. Our first lad barely managed an hour in the mornings for a good year. If we delayed it became a battle. First sign of tiredness he went straight down

I have and it worked a bit some days but as the day goes on he gets harder and harder.. and today he’s still awake and now we’ll over tired. As am I!

mirrorwall14

Beanybabog wrote: »

I have and it worked a bit some days but as the day goes on he gets harder and harder.. and today he’s still awake and now we’ll over tired. As am I!

I imagine. If I were you I’d try putting him straight down after breakfast (30 mins awake). If it doesn’t work then back up after 15-20 minutes. That means you have time to try again at 60-90 minutes without having gone way past tiredness

shesty

24 weeks here Beany. (we were around the same time?). Admittedly no. 3 but yes, have vivid memories of this with no. 2. Wind was/is a massive battle for us, but having learned from no. 1, I started settling them in cots for their naps from 12 weeks. This little guy is a bit all over the place in the day, but the morning nap is cast in stone, so start by committing to one nap a day, to happen in the cot, even if it is just for 20 mins. I picked the morning one as it worked out best. He is up round 7ish, has a feed in our bed, then down he comes for breakfast. There is no snoozing!He was in his bouncer during breakfast, now he's in his highchair. He (sometimes barely) makes it to the playschool drop off at 8:45 and then he is back to bed straightaway almost exactly 2 hours from when he wakes. At weekends, I just watch the clock and give him 2 hours. He is better now because he is used to it but the first few weeks of it were torturous....could be up to an hour of grunting, writhing, mad finger sucking, farting etc. Lying him on his side definitely helps.


Easiest thing is to bite it off in small chunks. Start with one nap and once he gets into that habit, he will be better for the others. All of mine are catnappers, 40mins, but he is actually starting to stretch for me. I've discovered he likes a full tummy, so if he has a bottle right before sleep, he does an hour or even more. Not something I've had with the other two - they really are all different! I wouldn't be rocking or anything, just pop him in his cot, close the curtains and wait him out. If no joy after about 40 mins, take him up, try him again 30 mins later....a week or two of that hell and you should have him in better habits.


That's the problem with the second and subsequent you see ..... they have way more to look at and you are frazzled, so you can't keep the good habits going so easily!!!But he and you need the sleep to happen.:DWe are having nightime sleep regressions too here, it's tough going.

fits

It’s all a bit of a blur but I think it was around the five months we had the three naps a day and the middle one started to get longer. If you get him up at 7 and back down around 9. Might be something to try?

I always put them in the car and went for a drive for the third nap because the evenings sucked! ( usually to macdonalds drive thru! ).

Beanybabog

Jaysus Id love a Mac Donald’s right now lol!! I survive on toast and coffee.

fits

Beanybabog wrote: »

Jaysus Id love a Mac Donald’s right now lol!! I survive on toast and coffee.

It was usually coffee I got in macdonalds ! ( still do)

Anne_cordelia

mirrorwall14 wrote: »

I imagine. If I were you I’d try putting him straight down after breakfast (30 mins awake). If it doesn’t work then back up after 15-20 minutes. That means you have time to try again at 60-90 minutes without having gone way past tiredness

I agree with this

Anne_cordelia

We moved to 2naps around 6 month and 1 nap at 11 months

shesty

But see if they are only doing 40mins, that doesn't work.You end up chasing three-four naps a day for ages, it's a nightmare.My first stretched to long naps at six months, so we dropped the (hellish)4/5pm nap (I hate that one), my second didn't stretch til 9 months and himself is just beginning to stretch but still does three in a day.At lest.

Beany, the first one should be easiest to absolutely commit to, because in theory they are the least tired then so should settle easiest.If you can get that, and your daughter still sleeps in the day, then you can work on the second once she's asleep.Himself was doing the evening one in the sling til recently but now he just won't settle in it once the others come in.He's up in his bed for them all now.

dori_dormer

45 minutes would be normal as its 1 sleep cycle. When they start sleeping beyond that you can kinda drop to 2 naps. My first was a terrible sleeper and needed to go down after 1 hr awake. Even tho you think sling might be distracting you'd be surprised. The warm body, mum's heartbeat , upright more comfortable and legs in m shape so less pain from wind might really help. And the bouncing as you walk.

Marz66

I agree with the try for 15-20 mins. If it doesn’t work give them 20 mins up again and try again for another 15-20 mins. They are more likely to have a long nap if they fall asleep by themselves so persevere with that if you can.

If that’s not working, u could try the buggy in the house if u have any long room or long corridor. I used to wheel the buggy over and back for 5 mins (give it the full 5 mins) and it’s how we did naps for a while. If u don’t have a long corridor, over and back on the door saddle can work too.
If they wake at 45 mins, you can try pushing the buggy again to see will they go back to sleep.

Also sleep books can be good. Sounds like you know what you’re doing but they’re good for giving you ‘instructions’ so that you’re not doubting yourself.

You’re not failing, this is a notoriously bad age for naps. And it doesn’t get easier until they’re on 2 good length naps.

A good bit of advice I got was try as hard as you can to get them good naps. But if it doesn’t work, don’t let a bad nap ruin your day, u’ve done all u can and they will get better at napping as they get older.

GreeBo

GreeBo wrote: »

I wouldnt keep trying for 90 minutes, if they dont go off after 15-20 mins then its just not going to happen.


Is he showing signs of tiredness, rubbing eyes, yawning etc?
If he isnt then I think you arent going to get anywhere with a nap.

If he is, then (from what I am currently experiencing!) its always bloody trapped wind.

Are you napping him in his own bed or somewhere else? Is he roaring or just making noises to himself?

My daughter will often make a lot of noise when she first goes down, but its not full on crying, though sometimes she will shout out or whimper but she is basically self soothing.

Is there anything in the room that would be preventing sleep?
Equally, is there something in the room that would distract him enough to fall asleep?

We use a woombie sleep sack like this one, and other than making her look like a strange alter boy, it really helps her sleep. Without it she keeps waking herself by either startling or rubbing her face.
We also got a little light the projects shapes onto the wall/ceiling to keep her amused.

Oh god I remember these days.

Lately my ~7 month old has taken to doing 30 minute sleeps all night long...its torture for whichever of us is on duty but we are really trying to teach her (again!) to self settle and not rely on holding, rocking etc.

She was sick for a week or so just after having some jet lag so she got used to being nursed to sleep, to the point where she would be roaring and then you pick her up and within 2 mins she is snoring, only to continue roaring the second she is put back down.

So, OP, if you are still suffering, know that its not just you, most babies go through these sleep regressions at some stage and you *just* have to stick with your routine.

It can be very hard, but try to avoid getting your baby dependent on sleep crutches or everytime they (naturally) wake during the night at the end of a sleep cycle they will expect the same crutch to be available and will roar if its not.

Good luck!