Tinder weight filter

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Amaris Tasteless Smallpox wrote: »

Who cares what someone else finds attractive?
Nobody should be made feel bad cause they don’t fancy a fat girl no more than a girl should be made feel bad about not liking short guys it’s all subjective and nobody is wrong

As well, I don’t get people saying that it’s not okay to prefer tall guys because shortness is something that can't be helped, the subtext being “it’s not fair”. Life’s not fair! Should I be upset that a beautiful woman gets more male attention than me? I’ve heard people say in response to that “you can have plastic surgery!”. Yeah, most people can’t afford that or don’t want unnecessary surgery and the results are far from certain so realistically, most people have to accept that the beautiful people will more attention. Likewise, a short guy has to accept that some women prefer tall men and it’s something they can’t help.

How Soon Is Now

Uhhh im after going threw most this thread and i still dont know what the topic actually is!


Fat racist small dicks on tinder?

jimmycrackcorm

There is a fat filter.

Experienced this myself. Had a match with a beauty on tinder. Started chatting and it was like we were soul mates.

Asked her out after a week and we met up. Well, if it hadn't been for my ex, who I get on well with and who suggested that head only photos suggested hiding body issues, I would have gotten a shock when she walked in.

But I was hooked by our chats so now I'm going out with someone that I'd never have picked otherwise.

Turns out that looks aren't actually everything. Who'd have thunk it?

armaghlad

I’m not sure if this had been previously mentioned, but Tinder also needs a baby-mama filter.

Dalomanakora

jimmycrackcorm wrote: »

There is a fat filter.

Experienced this myself. Had a match with a beauty on tinder. Started chatting and it was like we were soul mates.

Asked her out after a week and we met up. Well, if it hadn't been for my ex, who I get on well with and who suggested that head only photos suggested hiding body issues, I would have gotten a shock when she walked in.

But I was hooked by our chats so now I'm going out with someone that I'd never have picked otherwise.

Turns out that looks aren't actually everything. Who'd have thunk it?

Looks aren't everything, but you can't shag a personality.

The whole deception of only posting her face would have turned me off too, but ultimately you've obviously seen something you like in her so happy days and I hope it goes well



I'm fat. I used to be an awful lot bigger, so as a size 14 now (too big for my height before anyone spouts on about average clothing sizes), I'm confident enough to post full body shots if I decide to try online dating (recently single too!). I really really hate to think how much a woman must dislike herself to only post well angled face shots. She knows she's setting herself up for disaster because of the deception but Jesus, imagine hating yourself that much?



People lie about lots of stuff with online dating though, not just weight. Age, height, job, relationship status, family status and name are some I've come across several years back.




So just carry on. If you don't like overweight women, don't ask someone on a date if they don't post full body pics. Simple really.

dartboardio

So so so glad I am in a long term relationship and don’t use these apps for absolute lowlifes ticking boxes about what you will accept or won’t accept in a partner when you’re struggling to ‘find one’ as it is

When in reality everyone is so different and a guy who claims ‘no fatties’ could end up with a girl considered fat just because he likes her. I can’t believe I’m stooping down to the level and having to justify a ‘fat girl’ but I remember being younger and I was quite overweight, I used to wonder why no one liked me, I’d see these fat girls like me and wonder why they had so many friends and people interested in them, turns out people didn’t dislike me because I was fat they disliked me because I wasn’t a nice person (negative self image so came through in my personality)

So really taught me it absolutely makes no odds. People will like or dislike for you. But how can they do that looking at a phone screen anyway

And there’s no point sayin you dislike fat girls bevause whats a fat girl? It depends on how she carries her weight I know some girls that are fat but are absolutely gorgeous and have many men that would usually go for slim girls, fancying them.

Where as when I was overweight no one was attracted to me because I didn’t carry my weight well, I looked frumpy and you could tell I didn’t like myself so that makes all the difference.

Depends on the girl, some ‘fat girls’ you disregard their weight as they seem gorgeous inside and out.

One eyed Jack

dartboardio wrote: »

So so so glad I am in a long term relationship and don’t use these apps for absolute lowlifes ticking boxes about what you will accept or won’t accept in a partner when you’re struggling to ‘find one’ as it is

When in reality everyone is so different and a guy who claims ‘no fatties’ could end up with a girl considered fat just because he likes her. I can’t believe I’m stooping down to the level and having to justify a ‘fat girl’ but I remember being younger and I was quite overweight, I used to wonder why no one liked me, I’d see these fat girls like me and wonder why they had so many friends and people interested in them, turns out people didn’t dislike me because I was fat they disliked me because I wasn’t a nice person (negative self image so came through in my personality)

So really taught me it absolutely makes no odds. People will like or dislike for you. But how can they do that looking at a phone screen anyway

That’s not justifying fat girls, that’s explaining why nobody liked you. Just from reading the above few sentences alone I can see your attitude towards other people hasn’t changed as much as you like to think it has, IMO.

And there’s no point sayin you dislike fat girls bevause whats a fat girl? It depends on how she carries her weight I know some girls that are fat but are absolutely gorgeous and have many men that would usually go for slim girls, fancying them.

Where as when I was overweight no one was attracted to me because I didn’t carry my weight well, I looked frumpy and you could tell I didn’t like myself so that makes all the difference.

There is of course a point in saying you don’t like fat girls, as much as there’s a point in me saying I like fat girls. What’s a fat girl? It’s a girl who’s fat. Very simple, and there’s only so much clothes can conceal, you’re kidding yourself if you’re gonna tell me you can’t tell the difference between a girl who is a size 8 and a girl who is a size 16. I’m not saying you would have to guess their sizes exactly, I’m saying that if you can’t tell the difference, you may well need a visit to specsavers, or stop telling people what you believe should be their reality, because one of us is deluding ourselves.

I too know plenty of girls who are fat and are absolutely gorgeous and they carry their weight well and all the rest of it. They’re still fat though, and they aren’t attractive to many guys. They aren’t trying to be attractive to any guys though, they don’t need the validation. They are just as picky about their choices when it comes to potential partners because they’ve never seen themselves as charity cases to be taken pity upon in the hope of a pity date and a five minute fumble between the sheets. They’re quite aware that first and foremost for most people is physical attraction, and the whole personality stuff is secondary in terms of a potential relationship.

Depends on the girl, some ‘fat girls’ you disregard their weight as they seem gorgeous inside and out.

It does indeed depend on the girl, but there isn’t such a shortage of girls that guys can’t whittle down their potential dating pool or that girls can’t whittle down their dating pool by filtering out the tyre kickers and time wasters and people they just don’t find physically attractive. You’d swear dating apps were some kind of charity initiative the way some people go on. I’m sure there’s a market for an app for social justice warrior dating if that’s your thing, but the likes of tinder, bumble etc probably aren’t it (unless they saw it as a business opportunity of course).

cannotlogin

Forget weight filters - all photos should be accurately dated stamped.

Tell me how

completedit wrote: »

It definitely is tbf. And it's not all okay, how the **** can it be all okay? Tell that to people who cry at home and want to ****ing step out on front of a train because they've been rejected outright and humiliated because of their dick size.:mad::mad::mad::mad:

If you genuinely feel this way, you need help. It is not something that you just have to deal with on your own. There was an article on the radio during the week where a clinical physiologist spoke about body dysmorphia, how difficult it can be and how to start getting help with it.

Body Dysmorphia


The podcast in question is from Tuesday the 6th November and is called "On the couch".

completedit wrote: »

I'm 9 per cent bf so I'm not some typical hippo. I think that shows how small I am tbh because averages take into account fatties who if they lost weight would gain a few inches. The kind of girls I know aren't getting with fat guys so I imagine the average they've experienced is like 6 inches or so.

I would strongly suspect that your attitude (and expectation that you are going to be rejected) is an infinitely bigger reason why you struggle with relationships than any of your physical attributes.

Try to work on your own sense and self worth. The rest will then be more likely to happen.

Lia_lia

Some people are so picky when it comes to looks. I know plenty of overweight women who are absolutely stunning. Many women put on weight anyway after a few years in a relationship. I've put on almost 20KG (!!) since I started going out with my fella. But I was underweight to begin with and still not overweight after putting on 20KG.

The mens height thing I another one I don't understand. I've friends who are average female height (5'4"/5'5") who won't go out with anyone over 6 foot. And then give out they are are single My OH is the exact same height as me (5'9") and doesn't bother me in the slightest.

kerryjack

I turned down this big heafty lady one night about 20 years ago i think she was Canadian she was 6 foot tall and 3 foot wide. I do often think back and wonder what she would be like , its a regret i have . If ye are able lads go out tonight and grab one and let me know tomorrow how ye get on.

Dtp1979

kerryjack wrote: »

I turned down this big heafty lady one night about 20 years ago i think she was Canadian she was 6 foot tall and 3 foot wide. I do often think back and wonder what she would be like , its a regret i have . If ye are able lads go out tonight and grab one and let me know tomorrow how ye get on.

Looks like she dodged a bullet tbh

skittles8710

Lia_lia wrote: »

Some people are so picky when it comes to looks. I know plenty of overweight women who are absolutely stunning. Many women put on weight anyway after a few years in a relationship. I've put on almost 20KG (!!) since I started going out with my fella. But I was underweight to begin with and still not overweight after putting on 20KG.

The mens height thing I another one I don't understand. I've friends who are average female height (5'4"/5'5") who won't go out with anyone over 6 foot. And then give out they are are single My OH is the exact same height as me (5'9") and doesn't bother me in the slightest.

You can't put on 20kg and not be overweight... unless you were on deaths door beforehand ,!!!

completedit

Sounds like Lia_Lia has found her way to COPEnhagen.

Wibbs

completedit wrote: »

Sounds like Lia_Lia has found her way to COPEnhagen.

Jesus. Hardly. :rolleyes: While I have an issue with the "many women put on weight" in longtermers*, that's under three stone? Depends on hight and starting weight. A mate of mine is 5'10" and she was very thin. She put on about the same weight(cos she got healthy and into fitness. No bloke involved) and she looked better and was still within the realms of slim. And I say that as someone who favours thin and delicate of frame women.





*just as I would understand however hurtful it might be that if I bloated out and got lazy that a partner could and likely would find that a major turnoff.

Lia_lia

skittles8710 wrote: »

You can't put on 20kg and not be overweight... unless you were on deaths door beforehand ,!!!

Nope. I’m just over 5’9” and was 54 kg at my thinnest. Was too thin, but not on deaths door by any means. Now I’m 73-74 kg. I’m tall and a size 12 so definitely wouldn’t be considered overweight.

Bigbagofcans

Lia_lia wrote: »

Some people are so picky when it comes to looks. I know plenty of overweight women who are absolutely stunning. Many women put on weight anyway after a few years in a relationship. I've put on almost 20KG (!!) since I started going out with my fella. But I was underweight to begin with and still not overweight after putting on 20KG.

The mens height thing I another one I don't understand. I've friends who are average female height (5'4"/5'5") who won't go out with anyone over 6 foot. And then give out they are are single My OH is the exact same height as me (5'9") and doesn't bother me in the slightest.

But some people are just not attracted to overweight people no matter how much people try to convince them otherwise.
I'm not attracted to men who aren't in shape, I can't choose who I fancy.

Same goes for height. I'm just not into small/average height guys and there's nothing wrong with that.

Dalomanakora

Bigbagofcans wrote: »

But some people are just not attracted to overweight people no matter how much people try to convince them otherwise.
I'm not attracted to men who aren't in shape, I can't choose who I fancy.

Same goes for height. I'm just not into small/average height guys and there's nothing wrong with that.

Absolutely. Men and women have preferences.


It's just sad that people on boards seem to hone in on women who are overweight - there's fcuk all said about overweight men, whereas according to many posters on boards, you're a lazy, fat, unmotivated slob if you're 10lbs overweight.



If posters on boards who hate fat women saw me out and about, they'd think the same of me. She's fat, she's lazy, she's a slob. Little would they know by looking at me that I've worked my arse off over the last year to lose 4.5 stone, despite being literally bedbound from serious illness for a chunk of time.


They'd just make nasty, unkind assumptions as to who I am just because I'm not at THEIR ideal size YET.


The vitriol towards women who are overweight is fcuking vile.

completedit

What are you on about? Men are absolutely crucified for everything, remember a man is only as good as his worst flaw. Men get absolutely abused for everything, hair, hairline, height, dick size, fat just isn't that high on the list for men.

Dalomanakora

completedit wrote: »

What are you on about? Men are absolutely crucified for everything, remember a man is only as good as his worst flaw. Men get absolutely abused for everything, hair, hairline, height, dick size, fat just isn't that high on the list for men.

Please, show me all of the threads on boards where men are crucified for their penis size, hairline etc.

Once you've found them, compare them to the sheer number of threads about women's weight.



You've consistently projected your on insecurities on people in this thread and I really think you should talk to someone. It's not normal or healthy to hate yourself so much and you deserve happiness.

givyjoe

Dalomanakora wrote: »

Absolutely. Men and women have preferences.


It's just sad that people on boards seem to hone in on women who are overweight - there's fcuk all said about overweight men, whereas according to many posters on boards, you're a lazy, fat, unmotivated slob if you're 10lbs overweight.



If posters on boards who hate fat women saw me out and about, they'd think the same of me. She's fat, she's lazy, she's a slob. Little would they know by looking at me that I've worked my arse off over the last year to lose 4.5 stone, despite being literally bedbound from serious illness for a chunk of time.


They'd just make nasty, unkind assumptions as to who I am just because I'm not at THEIR ideal size YET.


The vitriol towards women who are overweight is fcuking vile.

That's more than a little OTT and not at all representative of this thread, there's no vitriol.

I may have missed it, but I didn't see anyone calling saying someone who is fat, is lazy and/or a slob.

Dalomanakora wrote: »

Please, show me all of the threads on boards where men are crucified for their penis size, hairline etc.

Once you've found them, compare them to the sheer number of threads about women's weight.



You've consistently projected your on insecurities on people in this thread and I really think you should talk to someone. It's not normal or healthy to hate yourself so much and you deserve happiness.

Pot, kettle, black there to be fair.

Dalomanakora

givyjoe wrote: »

That's more than a little OTT and not at all representative of this thread, there's no vitriol.

I may have missed it, but I didn't see anyone calling saying someone who is fat, is lazy and/or a slob.

Have a look through the numerous AH threads on women's weight then get back to me

givyjoe

Dalomanakora wrote: »

Have a look through the numerous AH threads on women's weight then get back to me

Read my post and get back to me. I'm referencing this thread, the one you're posting on.

Feel free to to share a link to a thread containing the vitriol you speak of.

Feisar

Have Tinder installed a weight filter yet?

givyjoe

Feisar wrote: »

Have Tinder installed a weight filter yet?

Try POF, they have one, sort of!

Feisar

givyjoe wrote: »

Try POF, they have one, sort of!

Oh I'm out of the game fortunately.

I used to use POF back in the day and got some slagging from my mates, they're all on Tinder now, well the single ones are.

Floppybits

Filters don't work because folks are going to lie to get round them, simples.

I could never understand why people restrict themselves to certain types, like some guys only like skinny blondes and wouldn't even consider a skinny dark haired woman or god forbid a skinny ginger:) or women who only want blokes who are over 6ft with blue eyes or some other such feature. Just think of all the different types of people you are missing out on, could never understand it.

Feisar

Floppybits wrote: »

Filters don't work because folks are going to lie to get round them, simples.

I could never understand why people restrict themselves to certain types, like some guys only like skinny blondes and wouldn't even consider a skinny dark haired woman or god forbid a skinny ginger:) or women who only want blokes who are over 6ft with blue eyes or some other such feature. Just think of all the different types of people you are missing out on, could never understand it.

I for one was always an equal opportunities employer!

Unfortunately this earned me the title man whore.

Reading this thread I'm so glad I did all that dating stuff back in the day ( sixties actually!!)

Recently looking through old photos I found ones of my secondary school days and graduation. It struck me how the really gorgeous girls were few and far between. Most of us (me included) were pretty plain! Some a bit everweight, some with crooked teeth (pre- braces days), some with weird haircuts, our clothes were pretty unflattering too. I had the cheapest glasses my mother could get.

The lads in the graduation ones were much the same. Hunks were scarce, a lot of the lads were either wimpy or overweight or spotty.

But the vast majority of us found matches, - and most of us are together still.

I'm aware I could get a lot of slagging here...........

One eyed Jack

Floppybits wrote: »

Filters don't work because folks are going to lie to get round them, simples.

I could never understand why people restrict themselves to certain types, like some guys only like skinny blondes and wouldn't even consider a skinny dark haired woman or god forbid a skinny ginger:) or women who only want blokes who are over 6ft with blue eyes or some other such feature. Just think of all the different types of people you are missing out on, could never understand it.

If they wouldn’t want to be with those people, then they’re not missing out on anything. Your argument kinda reminds me of the ‘argument’ that some straight guys will make to lesbian women - “Just think what you’re missing out on”.

Actually probably a better example would be to use my own preferences as an example. I prefer as I mentioned already fat girls, or at my age it’s perhaps more appropriate to refer to fat women. That, from my perspective anyway cuts out a lot of women. I’m not suggesting that slimmer women aren’t attractive, of course they are, but they just don’t interest me, or rather I’m just not interested in them. I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything, and they’re certainly not missing out on anything :pac:

But my point is simply that trying to manufacture interest in something I’m not interested in would be difficult first of all (not impossible, but difficult to sustain any kind of facade like that), pointless second of all, and thirdly it would just be unfair on the other person to be wasting their time trying to build a foundation for a relationship on nothing. The best either of us could hope for in those circumstances would be a great friendship.

DivingDuck

Floppybits wrote: »

Just think of all the different types of people you are missing out on, could never understand it.

If you don't find someone sexually attractive, you're not missing out on anything except making someone else feel ugly through your undisguisable lack of passion, and making yourself feel like a disappointed idiot. Where is the value in that for anyone?

Remember: we're not talking about being open to being friends with someone with different values, or being open to marrying someone whose culture is different to your own. We're talking about having sex with someone you don't fancy.

Why would anyone— assuming they were even technically able. that is, which in a lot of cases would be a literal issue, too.

ginandtonicsky

Floppybits wrote: »

Filters don't work because folks are going to lie to get round them, simples.

I could never understand why people restrict themselves to certain types, like some guys only like skinny blondes and wouldn't even consider a skinny dark haired woman or god forbid a skinny ginger:) or women who only want blokes who are over 6ft with blue eyes or some other such feature. Just think of all the different types of people you are missing out on, could never understand it.

Attraction isn't negotiable, that's the thing.

I do think the dating app culture we're living in has changed things, not necessarily for the better. IME in real life people aren't really hard and fast with their rules, they just know in general what their "type" is but are pretty flexible around that depending on whatever chemistry may or may not exist in person.

If I were to put it down on paper, I'd want a guy without too much baggage who's above a certain height, probably dark-haired and has a great sense of humour.

The most recent guy I dated was below that theoretical height, was a divorced single father, fair-haired and more on the intense than funny side. I was hook, line and sinker regardless. What was most attractive to me was that he had his sh1t together, was a really good father and took care of his health/fitness. Physically I loved his eyes and that he was "well put-together" as my mother would say. But on a dating app I probably wouldn't have looked twice.

You can't legislate for attraction, literally everyone is different. And that can cause a lot of angst and bitterness and agro in the online world because people will naturally try to define and control the uncontrollable - and they'll go for the obvious things that every man / woman would say they want. For women, height and career will be the big ones. For men, being goodlooking and slim will win out.

I'm, in theory, a "goodlooking slim woman", it hasn't brought love to me on these apps any easier than it would for anyone else. What it did bring me was lots of dates with men that fancied me "theoretically" but ultimately there was something missing and I was the casualty as they tried to figure that out. Or guys that just wanted sex. Or guys that weren't over their exes. Or guys that liked me but I didn't feel the same, and vice versa.

I'm no victim here - that's just dating! It's extraordinarily difficult and I would say somewhat reliant on a certain amount of undefinable "magic" to find someone that won't just be your friend, but your life partner, someone you feel both sexually and emotionally attracted to, and having those conventional things that people bleat on about might get you through a few more doors, but won't guarantee anything like this easy path that some around here would imagine they do.

bloodless_coup

It never ends.

I've got this same fat one liking me over and over, she must keep deleting and recreating her account.

I get a notification of a like and get all excited then see that yoke again, unbelievable.

completedit

Hahahahahahhaha ah man that's brutal tbh...why do you swipe on her though? I'm photogenic so Tinder is easy but I can't be bothered.

doylefe

doylefe wrote: »

It never ends.

I've got this same fat one liking me over and over, she must keep deleting and recreating her account.

I get a notification of a like and get all excited then see that yoke again, unbelievable.

that really bugs me, I reset it now and again when its all quiet or bored and its the same one, w as I went on a date with her about a year ago and she was on the aggressive side, deleted her on it and I kinda flick yes to everyone and she keeps adding me

Yer Da sells Avon

completedit wrote: »

What are you on about? Men are absolutely crucified for everything, remember a man is only as good as his worst flaw. Men get absolutely abused for everything, hair, hairline, height, dick size, fat just isn't that high on the list for men.

At 5'7" and a bit, I'm relatively short in stature (although I've been blessed with a terrific hairline and a huge dick) and I've never felt 'crucified' for my lack of height. I even mention it on my Tinder profile and still get swiped right on, including by women who are taller than me. My profile contains no reference to, or pictorial evidence of my aforementioned lengthiness, because I'm a very modest man, so they're not swiping right because of 'the big D'.

completedit

5'7'' is bad but not terrible if you make up for it in other ways.

Gimme A Pound

I really don't see how 5ft 7 is bad. It's not tall for a man but it's hardly short.

Yer Da sells Avon

Adam Massive Druggist wrote: »

I really don't see how 5ft 7 is bad. It's not tall for a man but it's hardly short.

It's not very short, but it's not exactly 'owner-occupier of enchanted beanstalk' either. I mean, apart from my boyish good looks, lustrous hair and charming personality, my relative shortness is probably my most distinguishing feature (at least when fully clothed). And yet no woman has ever slagged me about it. Plenty of men have.

completedit

Yer Da sells Avon wrote: »

It's not very short, but it's not exactly 'owner-occupier of enchanted beanstalk' either. I mean, apart from my boyish good looks, lustrous hair and charming personality, my relative shortness is probably my most distinguishing feature (at least when fully clothed). And yet no woman has ever slagged me about it. Plenty of men have.

Shock. The best looking guys always are 5'7'' if you have the face, height don't matter

givyjoe

completedit wrote: »

Shock. The best looking guys always are 5'7'' if you have the face, height don't matter

Not according to at least a third of the dating profiles I swipe on.

Bigbagofcans

Average height for a man is 5'10 and for a woman is 5'5.
I'd call 5'7 quite short for a man but not that short.

Gimme A Pound

doylefe wrote: »

It never ends.

I've got this same fat one liking me over and over, she must keep deleting and recreating her account.

I get a notification of a like and get all excited then see that yoke again, unbelievable.

Life's tough.

Yer Da sells Avon wrote: »

It's not very short, but it's not exactly 'owner-occupier of enchanted beanstalk' either.

Well obviously - but I don't get why people refer to 5ft 7 or 8 as midget-like for men. Where did this notion come from? It's not tall, but "not tall" doesn't automatically mean "small".

B0jangles

Adam Massive Druggist wrote: »

Well obviously - but I don't get why people refer to 5ft 7 or 8 as midget-like for men. Where did this notion come from? It's not tall, but "not tall" doesn't automatically mean "small".

Because for some people it's easier to blame all their problems on one, specific, unalterable characteristic than deal with the fact that it's not their height, it's their personality and the attitude they give off, that are the real problems.

In this case, because some women say they only want to meet men over a certain height, that means men under that height can give up any hope of ever meeting anyone, and anyone who claims otherwise is either deluding themselves or secretly a billionaire movie star (because those are the only other things women care about).

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy that allows for a lot of complaining and no actual effort.

professore

Bigbagofcans wrote: »

Average height for a man is 5'10 and for a woman is 5'5.
I'd call 5'7 quite short for a man but not that short.

Average height for a man most definitely IS NOT 5'10". In Holland it might be.

ohnonotgmail

professore wrote: »

Average height for a man most definitely IS NOT 5'10". In Holland it might be.

the average height for a man in holland is 5'11 to 6'. The average for europe is 5'10'.

professore

B0jangles wrote: »

Because for some people it's easier to blame all their problems on one, specific, unalterable characteristic than deal with the fact that it's not their height, it's their personality and the attitude they give off, that are the real problems.

In this case, because some women say they only want to meet men over a certain height, that means men under that height can give up any hope of ever meeting anyone, and anyone who claims otherwise is either deluding themselves or secretly a billionaire movie star (because those are the only other things women care about).

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy that allows for a lot of complaining and no actual effort.

In fairness other than taking flattering pictures and working out forever, on Tinder there isn't anything personality wise you can do to improve yourself.

That only kicks in in person.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

B0jangles wrote: »

Because for some people it's easier to blame all their problems on one, specific, unalterable characteristic than deal with the fact that it's not their height, it's their personality and the attitude they give off, that are the real problems.

In this case, because some women say they only want to meet men over a certain height, that means men under that height can give up any hope of ever meeting anyone, and anyone who claims otherwise is either deluding themselves or secretly a billionaire movie star (because those are the only other things women care about).

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy that allows for a lot of complaining and no actual effort.

Totally agree. Generally find self described nice guys are the worst, I’d stay well clear of them. They’re usually the ones who get quite aggressive with a girl they feel they’ve been nice to, and therefore that obligates her to date him. He’s a nice guy but women are shallow bitches, women prefer arseholes, women don’t deserve nice guys being nice to them.
There is nothing - not height, weight, grey hair or baldness, crooked teeth - more off putting than a man who feels like he’s owed a relationship with a girl he finds attractive but she is not afforded the same courtesy because she’s vain or shallow or a bitch.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

skittles8710 wrote: »

You can't put on 20kg and not be overweight... unless you were on deaths door beforehand ,!!!

Well, let’s say Lia Lia is 5’9”. 20kg is around a 3 stone gain. To get to BMI 25 at 5’9”, you’d need to be in the low 12 stones. So a tall woman could easily be 9 stone and gain 3 stone and still not be overweight. And 9 stone would also see her being a healthy weight.

I have no idea if Lia Lia IS that tall but what she describes isn’t crazy if she IS tall. I’m just demonstrating that what she says is possible.

B0jangles

professore wrote: »

In fairness other than taking flattering pictures and working out forever, on Tinder there isn't anything personality wise you can do to improve yourself.

That only kicks in in person.

Oh absolutely - online dating is fundamentally shallow at the start, no question -it's tough.

I just don't see the point of complaining about people who publically list what I might think are nasty or unreasonable requirements - how would it be better if they didn't list them, but they still had them privately? I might end up actually meeting up with them, all hopeful and excited, only to be flatly rejected to my face.