Male Masseuse

pwurple

Pac1Man wrote: »

Oh come on now. Reasonable logic has no home in a place like this.

So, you have had men rub their erections against you, accidentally?

Please, share the circumstances. Were you nude at the time?

Maggiesm70

I'm fairly big chested, I had massages by males masseuses, i remember being asked if I wanted to leave my bra on, I found it easier to remove it to get the benefit of the massage.

I've had the sides of my breasts rubbed during the massage, if I need to move the massuse holds up a towel and turns his head away, I didn't think anything of it it's part of the massage

I had a massage in turkey where the male massuse That did make me feel uncomfortable

It's true those of us with big boobs do accidentally brush them off people now and again

Maybe change masseuse it seems like your going to have doubt about your current one and any massage you will be on edge

ted1

pwurple wrote: »

Seriously? You think breasts, those tisssues for feeding babies, are the same as sex organs? Aha. Someone slept through their education.


Can you rape someone with a breast?
Is it indecent exposure to breastfeed, or let children see any part of a breast?

Can you rape someone with a penis?
Is it indecent exposure to take out your erection, and show that to children?



Actually, I still want to know if a guy rubs his erection of another guy, who doesn’t invite it, are we all cool and the gang with that? Happens all the time, yeah? I mean, what’s a guy to do, erections just happen. Swimming around in the pool, bloke rubs his erect cock off you. Is that totally normal? Getting a massage, masseur has a stiffy. hey, let’s rub it off this other guy on the table. Every other week this goes on, is it? Give me a break. This is the only double standard here. It’s because she is a woman, she is expected to accept this. A fella would knock his block off.


She should take it as a compliment anyway, for being so sexy. He can’t help it, right?

Breasts are used by many women in a sexual manner. To imply that they are only used fir breast feeding is very naive.

If a man accidentally rubbed his erect penis off me, sure it might be awkward but I wouldn’t start a fight.
I guess we must have very different personalities, some people are naturally aggressive and confrontational where as other people are understanding.

John Sacrimoni

naughtysmurf wrote: »

To lose the ability to get a hard on, no but to be professional enough not to get one , yes. Do you seriously think that male gynecologists are wandering around with constant erections?

FFS, have you ever spoke to a man in your life?

AllForIt

This thread is very funny.

Pac1Man

John Sacrimoni wrote: »

FFS, have you ever spoke to a man in your life?

Any time I know I'll be in a professional setting I wake up, look down and declare:

"Not today penis,..."

I then repeat it for dramatic effect:

"...not todaaay."

Twenty Grand

John Sacrimoni wrote: »

FFS, have you ever spoke to a man in your life?

There seems to be a lot of women here who believe that erections are totally controllable and men can make them go up and down at will

Fann Linn

Twenty Grand wrote: »

There seems to be a lot of women here who believe that erections are totally controllable and men can make them go up and down at will

It's the gender fluid that does it!

B0jangles

Are you guys saying that men have absolutely no control over their penises and what they do with them? That if they get an unexpected erection, it's 'oh well just let it smack off whatever's in the way, I can't help myself?'

Would this apply if another guy just casually started letting his erection brush up against you in a sauna maybe, or is it only other people who have to be understanding of the mysterious and uncontrollable power of the penis? It's not an extra f*cking leg he's being expected to keep to himself, it's a relatively small body part.

OP paid a professional for a massage. If he can't manage to conceal the fact that he has an unexpected erection from his customers when he is fully dressed and they are lying there, probably with their eyes closed, he should probably get into another line of business. She'd never have even known about it if he hadn't been literally rubbing it up against her.

Fann Linn

B0jangles wrote: »

Are you guys saying that men have absolutely no control over their penises and what they do with them? That if they get an unexpected erection, it's 'oh well just let it smack off whatever's in the way, I can't help myself?'

Would this apply if another guy just casually started letting his erection brush up against you in a sauna maybe, or is it only other people who have to be understanding of the mysterious and uncontrollable power of the penis? It's not an extra f*cking leg he's being expected to keep to himself, it's a relatively small body part.

OP paid a professional for a massage. If he can't manage to conceal the fact that he has an unexpected erection from his customers when he is fully dressed and they are lying there, probably with their eyes closed, he should probably get into another line of business. She'd never have even known about it if he hadn't been literally rubbing it up against her.

I'm gonna go the George Hook route here and if the OP isn't happy with the masseuse, 'take her business elsewhere'

naughtysmurf

John Sacrimoni wrote: »

FFS, have you ever spoke to a man in your life?

Yeah, everyday & I'm male too, some posters on here must have awful trouble controlling themselves.

Have had loads of massages over the years but only in reputable places, don't find them erotic, never once got turned on, why, because that's not what I'm there for, I'm there for the relaxation, stress relief, wellness etc aspect of it all, if the Mrs & I are having massage night in, then that's a different situation

Just checked with the Mrs, she has never had her breasts massaged while on her back, on her front, the side of her breasts would come in contact with the therapists hands, she'd consider that ok during a full body massage

All of the places we've visited over the years use the draping technique where everything is covered except the part been massaged at the time, in my experience, I doubt many therapists would notice if a male got an erection as they all tend to put plenty of towel cover in that area I assume because they are not interested in seeing it but I'm sure there probably are other massage type places that have lower operating standards for a different clientele

If I was male or female in a reputable spa & I was 100% certain a male therepist had an erection during a treatment with me, I'd report it, I'm also pretty sure that they would be managing him out the door pretty quickly

pwurple

Twenty Grand wrote: »

There seems to be a lot of women here who believe that erections are totally controllable and men can make them go up and down at will

Pretty sure hips are controllable and they can move back the half inch required to not rub erection against the client.

:rolleyes:

Twenty Grand

pwurple wrote: »

Pretty sure hips are controllable and they can move back the half inch required to not rub erection against the client.

:rolleyes:

Maybe the guy didn't notice? Maybe hes a creep?
I'm not defending him, I'm confused over some of the comments here where people show a total ignorance to male biology.

pwurple

You see, now, the discussion is skirting close to being an example of rape culture. Social attitudes that normalise or trivialise sexual assault.

The impression given is that men can’t help themselves around women. No matter what the situation, must rub cock off it. Erections rubbing against people (wait, still women only so far) are completely uncontrollable.


We all know that’s not the case. But this banter crap normalises it.

John Sacrimoni

pwurple wrote: »

You see, now, the discussion is skirting close to being an example of rape culture. Social attitudes that normalise or trivialise sexual assault.

The impression given is that men can’t help themselves around women. No matter what the situation, must rub cock off it. Erections rubbing against people (wait, still women only so far) are completely uncontrollable.


We all know that’s not the case. But this banter crap normalises it.

You are expecting men to not get an erection when massaging a womans naked body, do you even know what you are saying?

No one here is defending the guy touching off the woman with his erection.

ted1

pwurple wrote: »

Pretty sure hips are controllable and they can move back the half inch required to not rub erection against the client.

:rolleyes:

Are you saying no female masseuse has ever rubbed her hip accidentally off a customer ?

It’s like banging a toe off a piece of furniture, not intentional but it happens

ted1

pwurple wrote: »

You see, now, the discussion is skirting close to being an example of rape culture. Social attitudes that normalise or trivialise sexual assault.

The impression given is that men can’t help themselves around women. No matter what the situation, must rub cock off it. Erections rubbing against people (wait, still women only so far) are completely uncontrollable.


We all know that’s not the case. But this banter crap normalises it.

You are the only one who ever said that they can’t rub of men. You actually suggested violence if it was to rub off a man.

I don’t see any sexual assault here. A masseuse got a involuntary erection. ( it happens) and it accidentally brushed off a client. Maybe he thought he could hide it. Maybe he felt uncomfortable with saying “ excuse me I need to take a break , because I have an etection and I’ll be back shortly “

pwurple

John Sacrimoni wrote: »

No one here is defending the guy touching off the woman with his erection.

That would be slightly more convincing if the following two posts after yours weren’t doing exactly that...

And ‘touching off’ is trivialising again. She wouldn’t have noticed that.

Fann Linn

Just shows how quick some are when crying 'sexual assault'.

pwurple

Fann Linn wrote: »

Just shows how quick some are when crying 'sexual assault'.

Absolutely!

Dangerous world out there lads if you like to rub your genitalia against your customers. Best practice is to avoid it I’d say.

Fann Linn

pwurple wrote: »

Absolutely!

Dangerous world out there lads if you like to rub your genitalia against your customers. Best practice is to avoid it I’d say.

Don't think so. It's actually getting to the stage now that when 'wolf' is being called out, more and more are beginning to question it. Sexual assault and rape is being trivialised by the twitter mouthpieces.

I'm going myself for a haircut this morning. I just hope I'm not sexually assaulted by the hairdresser reaching across me.

pwurple

So, you’re saying your hairdresser normally rubs his erect penis off you while he is cutting your hair?

And this is totally normal.

Fann Linn

pwurple wrote: »

So, you’re saying your hairdresser normally rubs his erect penis off you while he is cutting your hair?

And this is totally normal.

No. She's a nice Polish woman.

KevinCavan

Ah come on please, getting a man to massage your baps and expecting him not to get an erection? Why didn’t you get a female to massage you, is this the kind of thing you wanted to happen?

harr

It sounds totally unprofessional on his part , I have a few male friends who have done massage courses in college as part of sports degrees and I have a few female friends who do it in a hotel spa setting. Was discussing this topic last night on a night out with them and others. The general consensus was that touching of breasts during any massage is pointless and that most agreed this certain individual was simply doing it for sexual gratification.

seamus

pwurple wrote: »

How so? It’s a real court case. Where men put their dicks has criminal results when unwanted, at all sorts of levels.

Suggested action of not rubbing penis against customers or strangers is mad altogether is it?

You're comparing a court case where some dirtbird sexually assaulted a woman in public with his exposed penis, against the incidental case described in the OP where a man's (clothed) groin area came into contact with her during a massage.

It's ridiculous. Getting an erection is perfectly normal. Close-contact services like massage result in unavoidable scenarios where parts of the body of each may come into contact (the masseur is clothed, of course).

It would be different if he was grinding up against the client or something. But that's not what happened here.

What do YOU think he should have done? And "not allowed his penis to touch her" is not an answer, unless you think he should have excused himself and left.

sullivlo

Mod Note

The standard of posting has to increase, otherwise the thread will be closed or infractions will be handed out. Some posts are bordering on personal abuse.

Final warning.

ted1

pwurple wrote: »

So, you’re saying your hairdresser normally rubs his erect penis off you while he is cutting your hair?

And this is totally normal.

Go back to the op and you’ll find that he doesn’t normally accidentally brush his penis off her. It was s one off

harr

Reading the first post it’s clear he rubbed himself against her on a few occasions during that massage ... once or even twice you might consider an accident but for it to happen a number of times seems deliberately done.

Of all the sports rub downs I have gotten and massages in spas both from men and women I can honestly only think of maybe a couple of times where you might feel a breast rub against you but never has a Male masseuse gotten so close he accidentally rubbed his cock off me...
I can believe people think what happened was ok...of course he might not of been able to control it but he should have been professional and excused himself and gotten another person to take over...

seamus

harr wrote: »

I can believe people think what happened was ok...of course he might not of been able to control it but he should have been professional and excused himself and gotten another person to take over...

This is unreasonable though.

It would mean that male masseurs would frequently have to avoid massaging women completely. "Professional" would be more like ensuring that you're not wearing loose clothing (like tracksuit bottoms or shorts), excusing yourself if you need to "adjust" and avoiding bringing attention to it. But not walking out in the middle of a massage because you've got an erection.

This is more about the squeamishness of the client than anything else. It's one of the few burdens that men have to carry; highly visible external signs of arousal; and you're saying that they should be obliged to hide themselves away because it might make someone uncomfortable?

Surely we can all be adults and accept that these things happen?

harr

seamus wrote: »

This is unreasonable though.

It would mean that male masseurs would frequently have to avoid massaging women completely. "Professional" would be more like ensuring that you're not wearing loose clothing (like tracksuit bottoms or shorts), excusing yourself if you need to "adjust" and avoiding bringing attention to it. But not walking out in the middle of a massage because you've got an erection.

This is more about the squeamishness of the client than anything else. It's one of the few burdens that men have to carry; highly visible external signs of arousal; and you're saying that they should be obliged to hide themselves away because it might make someone uncomfortable?

Surely we can all be adults and accept that these things happen?

Why should she have to accept someone else getting sexual pleasure from touching her body ?
She felt uncomfortable and should have said something.
You would really have to question why he needed to touch her breasts at all.

seamus

harr wrote: »

Why should she have to accept someone else getting sexual pleasure from touching her body ?

That's a leap to make. There's nothing in the OP to suggest that he was "getting sexual pleasure", certainly not intentionally or maliciously.

She felt uncomfortable and should have said something.
You would really have to question why he needed to touch her breasts at all.

Perhaps. It's a separate question though. I'm not a masseur so I don't know if this is a "known" massage area.

There's a level of trust required here; I've gotten massages where it felt like my shoulder was going to pop out of the socket. Should I have said something? No, I trusted that the masseuse knew what she was doing.

Likewise here, the OP has trusted that the masseur knows what he's doing, therefore should she say something? Well no, he asked if she wanted a massage in that area and she said "yes".

So what is there for her to say? "How dare you get an erection in my presence! Despite the fact that you have no control over it you should be ashamed of yourself!"

pwurple

seamus wrote: »

This is unreasonable though.

It would mean that male masseurs would frequently have to avoid massaging women completely. "Professional" would be more like ensuring that you're not wearing loose clothing (like tracksuit bottoms or shorts), excusing yourself if you need to "adjust" and avoiding bringing attention to it. But not walking out in the middle of a massage because you've got an erection.

This is more about the squeamishness of the client than anything else. It's one of the few burdens that men have to carry; highly visible external signs of arousal; and you're saying that they should be obliged to hide themselves away because it might make someone uncomfortable?

Surely we can all be adults and accept that these things happen?

Erections happen, no bother whatsoever.

Rubbing it against other people... now you're crossing the line.

No one's suggesting he hides it in some abnormal way (other than keeping his pants firmly on obviously). Just don't rub your erect cock off your customers... and if you can't manage that, step away.


Seriously, how exactly is that unreasonable?

seamus

pwurple wrote: »

Erections happen, no bother whatsoever.

Rubbing it against other people... now you're crossing the line.

No one's suggesting he hides it in some abnormal way (other than keeping his pants firmly on obviously). Just don't rub your erect cock off your customers... and if you can't manage that, step away.


Seriously, how exactly is that unreasonable?

Go read the OP again. There's no suggestion that he was "rubbing his erect cock" off her. Rather,

"I could feel his erection anytime he moved against me".

A masseur/se cannot maintain a distance where only the required body parts touch the customer. The customer is lying down, many of the therapies require bodyweight behind them, or at the very least reaching.

It is unavoidable therefore that the therapist's lower body (i.e. anything below the chest) will sometimes come into contact with the customer's in the course of a massage. It would be impossible to do a massage otherwise.

If the masseur happens to have an erection, then that may be tangible to the customer, but it doesn't mean he's rubbing his penis against the customer for the sake of personal gratification. That's the leap you've made.

More likely at that moment he wants to die because he's worrying if the customer can feel it while trying to maintain professional composure.

Suggesting that he "step away" is therefore unreasonable. Like I say, if this was the "standard practice", it would for all intents and purposes make it impossible for men to become masseurs, because they would have to "step away" for a large portion of their sessions, even with male customers on the table.

If such a possibility makes you uncomfortable, then any massage place will allow you to state that you want a female masseuse in favour of a male. There is no, "I want a male who cannot get an erection" option.

pwurple

Heh. I like the way you snipped the OP, removing this part of what she wrote. "It was extremely uncomfortable! I did not know what to do. "


Seamus, in your life, have you experienced this? I haven't, and I don't think I know anyone else who has. I've had plenty of massages. I don't know what kind of massages you are getting, but there is no requirement at any point to rub your crotch off the client, either erect, or flaccid.

I've asked every contributor here defending this have they ever encountered this. I see zero responses saying either they do this to customers, or that they have experienced it themselves. Which further defends my position from my own experience, it simply isn't the norm.


The OP is perfectly correct in her instincts that it is a bit off.

seamus

pwurple wrote: »

Heh. I like the way you snipped the OP, removing this part of what she wrote. "It was extremely uncomfortable! I did not know what to do. "

That's not relevant though. The fact that she's uncomfortable doesn't mean it was intentional on his part. He's not a mind reader, he doesn't know that she can feel it or that she's uncomfortable.

Seamus, in your life, have you experienced this?

I have had many, many, many unwanted and uncontrolled erections in my life.

I have not had a massage from a male, but I have from a female, and I can say with absolute certainty that their lower body came into contact with me in the course of that massage.
So I can quite reasonably put the two together and imagine that this is a frequent issue for male masseurs, such that "excuse yourself and step out" is impractical, and taking practical measures to limit the obviousness of it are more reasonable.

The OP is perfectly correct in her instincts that it is a bit off.

She may very well be, and I have previously advised that she should talk to another masseuse for advice/clarity.

I'm discussing here the implication that you are making, which is that he assaulted her sexually. When there is nothing in the OP to suggest he did. Your continued use of the word "rubbing", is you throwing a spin into the story, which doesn't exist at all.

meeeeh

I think it's perfectly normal for op to feel uncomfortable. She didn't consider her massage sexual and the person doing the massage did. Personally I would go to someone else next time that doesn't make you uncomfortable.

Those (men) who think it's completely normal would you feel comfortable if man massaging you would brush against you with his errect penis every so often?

seamus

meeeeh wrote: »

I think it's perfectly normal for op to feel uncomfortable.

Absolutely.

She didn't consider her massage sexual and the person doing the massage did.

Even that's unfair. Just because he has an erection doesn't mean that he thinks the massage is "sexual", or that there is in any way a non-professional tone to it.

Those (men) who think it's completely normal would you feel comfortable if man massaging you would brush against you with his errect penis every so often?

Genuinely, if I was aware that's what it was (I'm naive, I'd probably assume it was a phone or something!), but I was also satisfied that he wasn't deliberately rubbing it against me, then I wouldn't care.

ted1

meeeeh wrote: »

I think it's perfectly normal for op to feel uncomfortable. She didn't consider her massage sexual and the person doing the massage did.

Really? You are jumping to a conclusion there.
Random unwanted erections happen. I don’t find driving into two sexual but I do get an etection the odd time while doing it

ted1

meeeeh wrote: »

Those (men) who think it's completely normal would you feel comfortable if man massaging you would brush against you with his errect penis every so often?

It’d be awkward but I’d just ignore yet. Years of playing second row in rugby and water polo make you not really care about genital rubbing against you

.......

I cannot believe some of the posts on here.

Ive had many massages (deep tissue and otherwise), some by men, some by women.

At no point has anyone massaging me ever touched me with their groin. I fail to see how any type of massage would require contact with the persons penis, erect or not.

They work on you from either side. Why would their nether regions be in contact with your body AT ALL?

pwurple

seamus wrote: »

He's not a mind reader, he doesn't know that she can feel it or that she's uncomfortable.

Hey guys, is my penis in your ear bothering you?
How was I supposed to know, is this not normal?
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

lmfao.

seamus

pwurple wrote: »

Hey guys, is my penis in your ear bothering you?
How was I supposed to know, is this not normal?
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

lmfao.

If you're not going to engage with this honestly, then you're just wasting both our time.

Or if you genuinely think your post is analogous to the OP, then I don't know what to say. You might as well say that touching someone is a type of rape and get it over with.

Pelvis

seamus wrote: »

I have not had a massage from a male, but I have from a female, and I can say with absolute certainty that their lower body came into contact with me in the course of that massage.

If I was giving a massage that required this much contact and I happened to have an erection at the time, then I, being a logical human person, would probably go ahead and not do that thing which would result in me pushing up against an unwilling naked woman with my erection. In fact if this particular type of massage often gave me an erection, then I wouldn't offer to do it at all.

Getting one is normal of course, can't be helped. But I don't believe that the guy couldn't have done anything to stop it coming into contact with his client on multiple occasions, that seems a little weird to me.

One eyed Jack

seamus wrote: »

If you're not going to engage with this honestly, then you're just wasting both our time.

Or if you genuinely think your post is analogous to the OP, then I don't know what to say. You might as well say that touching someone is a type of rape and get it over with.

It’s a bit rich for you to claim someone else isn’t engaging honestly seamus when you come out with this -

seamus wrote: »

Even that's unfair. Just because he has an erection doesn't mean that he thinks the massage is "sexual", or that there is in any way a non-professional tone to it.

Genuinely, if I was aware that's what it was (I'm naive, I'd probably assume it was a phone or something!), but I was also satisfied that he wasn't deliberately rubbing it against me, then I wouldn't care.

Really? While an erection may well be an involuntary response, rubbing or brushing up against something knowing that they will be able to sense that you have an erection, is an entirely voluntary action.

And being unable to discern the difference between a phone and a penis? There’s Joey levels of naive, and there’s the 90’s called and wants it’s candybar phones back :pac:

I absolutely would care if a man became aroused while giving me a massage. There’s nothing inherently sexual about a sports massage, it’s a completely different context to a sexual massage, or a massage for any other purposes such as relaxation. I’ve received and given massages in various contexts over the years, and I’ve never become aroused while massaging anyone of the context wasn’t sexual. I’ve given full body massages and not once have I ever needed to use the full weight of my penis against a persons body while giving them a massage.

It just doesn’t happen unless it’s entirely intentional on the person giving a massage. If you’re aware of being touched, they’re even more aware of how and where they’re touching you. In the OPs case, the masseuse shouldn’t have been becoming aroused in the first place, and secondly should absolutely and without a doubt have excused himself and discontinued the session, both for the OPs sake, and for his own. He was obviously taking advantage of a situation where he thought the OP either wasn’t bothered, or was as naive as seamus.

That’s not a mars bar in his pocket either seamus :pac:

seamus

One eyed Jack wrote: »

the masseuse shouldn’t have been becoming aroused in the first place

And you call me naive :rolleyes:

One eyed Jack

seamus wrote: »

And you call me naive :rolleyes:

I didn’t call you naive seamus, you did. On the basis of what you wrote, I happen to agree with you, on this occasion at least - one would have to be incredibly naive to think a mans penis coming in contact with them during a massage is nothing to be concerned about, let alone imagine that it’s par for the course for men to become aroused while giving anyone a massage.

I know you said you have only ever received a massage from women, so you can’t really say one way or the other whether a man becoming aroused while giving a massage is normal. It isn’t, there’s no reason they could become aroused - their penis would not be coming in contact with anything (or shouldn’t, at least), and they should be of the mindset that they’re giving physiotherapy or massage therapy or a sports massage or whatever you want to call it. In a professional context it’s simply inappropriate and the masseuse could well have opened himself up to an allegation of sexual assault.

.......

seamus wrote: »

If you're not going to engage with this honestly, then you're just wasting both our time.

Oh come on seamus.

seamus wrote: »

Or if you genuinely think your post is analogous to the OP, then I don't know what to say. You might as well say that touching someone is a type of rape and get it over with.

We are talking about touching someone WITH YOUR PENIS. Not just touching someone.

Its not some uncontrollable rogue body part that goes touching people by itself.

ted1

....... wrote: »

Oh come on seamus.



We are talking about touching someone WITH YOUR PENIS. Not just touching someone.

Its not some uncontrollable rogue body part that goes touching people by itself.

no it’s talking about brushing the groin area of a customer. You are implying that they are naked and intentionally holding out the penis to touch it if someone

.......

ted1 wrote: »

no it’s talking about brushing the groin area of a customer. You are implying that they are naked and intentionally holding out the penis to touch it if someone

The customers groin wasnt touched.

The person giving the massage pressed his erection off the customer.

There is absolutely no need for a person to touch someone with their groin while giving a massage.

Lets be very clear here, a massage is not a full body contact activity. Its someone lying on a raised table with someone else leaning over them. If you had an erect penis and you were massaging a partially naked person, would you not endeavour NOT to touch your groin off them? I mean, even more so than normal? Would you not actively be scooting your groin away from the person (if you hadnt had the sense to excuse yourself I mean?).

Its borderline sexual assault IMO. I would be reporting it.